New Character Submission - (Brother) Khalem

[Mr. Erth]

Character: Khalem
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Class: Cleric
Race: Human
Alignment: Lawful Good
Deity: Toran
Domains: Protection War

Biography:

((I'll start out simple and short))
How did a lowly novice of Toran end up as an adventurer, you ask? Well, if one is to protect the weak, show the strength of The Great Leader and bring evil to justice, then sitting at home won't suffice, now will it?

Khalem had a childhood that was both special and strangely normal. A caravan, traveling through the woods near the a small town in the northern part of Mistone, was ambushed by bandits and managed to kill several of the travelers before being repelled by the guards. Khalem's mother was among the casualties. His father, a caravan guard, who couldn't bear the thought of raising him alone, left the 2-year-old Khalem outside the local temple of Toran, said a prayer and left him.

The priests, bound by their vow to guard the weak and help wherever possible, took him in and raised him as their own.

Khalem never managed to make a lot of friends aside from the clergymen and so spent most of his time behind the safe walls of the temple. He was an eager learner, striving to prove himself able, and, when he was old enough, became one the brothers himself.

18 years after the day he was brought to the temple, Khalem was ready to depart from his home. Determined to prove his worth, serve The All Watching, improve upon himself, fight evil and to see the world, Khalem set out as a rookie adventurer; a cleric of Toran.

___


OOC Stuff:
Alright, I don't know a whole lot about the locations in Layo so I figured I'd start with a character who comes from high up north and who, like me, will have a lot to learn about the world. If you have a suggestion for a specific location then I'm all ears.

Buildwise he's starting out as a cleric, possibly aiming for Paladin later on (if the circumstances allow it). In the end it is my goal to do my best to make him a Champion of Toran, but I know that takes CDQs and such, so I'll try out for that later. Nothing is really certain though, as I'd like to just "let him" develop and see how he ends up. I guess time will tell.

Now, the part about him being a cleric:
1. I (and Khalem) have read the dogma and expectations of Toran and I (= Khalem) intends to follow them.

2. Khalem was brought up with the teachings of Toran but he has yet to "test" them, or his conviction in them for that matter, in the real world. He believes that it is his duty to help out where he can, spreading the word of Toran both by speech and through actions. As he idolizes the Paladins of his order, he tries to follow the Paladin code somewhat but not as zealously as a Paladin himself would.
Does that suffice for now?

3. Khalem wears an ankh as a necklace but travels in a traveler's robe rather than a silver/blue/gold one. It is his goal acquire such a robe to reflect the glory of Toran. He wields a mace as it is less likely to kill or maim people than a sword. He desires to learn how to wield a longsword effectively, as it is the favored weapon of his deity. He will also seek to save up enough money for a proper armor (full plate, silver colored if possible).
He does what is expected of a cleric of Toran (though perhaps more information than available on the wiki would be nice to have. Is that possible).

Good enough?

[darkstorme]

Hi there!

This is a great start. I'd just like to see a little bit more between "taken in by the Toranites" and age 18 - a little bit to flesh Khalem out as a character.

As for location - in the north-central region of Mistone is the town of Fort Llast, the principal centre of worship for Toran on Mistone. It would probably be a good place to drop him off. (If you'd prefer a smaller temple, you can have a look at the Map of Mistone to get place names.)

As a bit of additional information, until 1420 (when Khalem was 6), the skies were blacked out by a nuclear winter effect generated by the destruction of a mountain range in the ultimate battle with Bloodstone. Famine, crop failure, population decrease, despair - the whole nine yards. This would be additional hardship heaped on Khalem's father to provoke his leaving his son in the church's care.

As for information about Toran Himself - what kinds of information were you looking for? Post any questions to this thread or to the Ask A Gamemaster forum, and we'll see what we can do to help.

Anyway, once you've expanded your story a bit to flesh out Khalem as a character, post again to this thread and it will be reviewed again.

Thanks!

[Mr. Erth]

((Attempt #2))
How did a lowly novice of Toran end up as an adventurer, you ask? Well, if one is to protect the weak, show the strength of The Great Leader and bring evil to justice, then sitting at home won't suffice, now will it?

Khalem had a childhood that was both special and strangely normal. A caravan traveling through Silkwood near Fort Llast in the northern part of Mistone, was ambushed by a band of bandits and brigands. In the initial attack, the bandits managed to kill several of the travelers before the caravan guards got hold of the situation and repelled the attack. Khalem's mother, a servant woman to one of the wealthy merchants, was among the casualties. When the wounded caravan proceeded and came through Beirun, Khalem's father, a caravan guard who couldn't bear the thought of raising him alone in a dark world of despair, went the temple of Toran with his 2-year-old son, said a prayer to the Great Leader and left him.

The priests, bound by their vow to guard the weak and help wherever possible, took him in and raised him as their own.

Khalem never managed to make a lot of friends aside from the clergymen and spent most of his time behind the safe walls of the temple. He was educated by the priests, both in mundane and divine subjects and proved an eager learner, striving to prove himself to the clerics and to make himself useful. However, growing up in a temple left Khalem a little naive as to what kind of place the world really is. The first time he experienced this was when he was sent to the market to shop alone for the first time and he returned with both an assortment of useless trinkets and overpriced groceries. He could not believe that the merchant would trick him just for the sake of profit and learned his lesson the hard way.

While not quite as naive as then, Khalem still has a lot to learn. When he reached the age of 20, he was sent on an educational journey to see the world and to show the world Toran.

Determined to prove his worth by serving The All Watching and improving upon himself by fighting evil where he meets it, Khalem sets out as a rookie adventurer; a cleric of Toran.

-----

I've tried to flesh it out somewhat, but I realize that it's still a bit short and thin for a biography, but I'm not quite sure what else to write. His life at the temple was somewhat eventless aside from the day to day stuff and Khalem is supposed to be a simple character to start me of with. His adventures should like to flesh him out more, both to others but also, especially, to my self.

Should you require more information about his personality, I'm perfectly willing to answer any questions but I'm not quite sure how much better I can do the biography at present. My writing skills need improvement, but I hope to learn that along the way.

I plan to do a lot his journal as letters to his temple, describing what he experiences and learns. This should be another source of information on his personality, but I hope you will bear with me for now as I just don't have all the much more to write.

[Rowana]

Hello Mr. Erth,

Thank you for looking at this and putting in the extra work. As far as Mistone goes, the only temple to Toran is in the city of Ft. Llast. It is significantly larger then Beriun, unfortunately, but it is the only place that meets your need in a Lore sense.

Also one other point of clarification, while some of Toran's devout may refer to fellow clergy members as 'brother' and 'sister' neither are official titles offered by the church. It is used only in a familial sense by a relatively few.

Thank you for your work on this!
~row

[Mr. Erth]

Okay, I've edited that and will keep both things in mind. Anything else I need to do before Khalem can be approved?

[darkstorme]

The White Horn forest is some four hundred miles, as the crow flies, from Fort Llast. (And that crow would have to fly over mountains.) This is clearly a hangover from Beriun, though, and not enough to hold this submission back. (Just remember, Silkwood. Or the Hammerbound peaks. )

Anyway, with all that said...
Your character has been approved.

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