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Character Approvals The characters on this board have been approved by a GM and may be played online, in the world.


Welcome to the Layonara forums!

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Old 07-19-08, 04:13 PM #1
Tai'dashar
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Default New Character Submission - Zidjian

Character: Zidjian
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Class: Paladin
Race: Aasimar
Alignment: Lawful Good
Deity: Toran


Biography:

Description
Zidjian is 6,3 ft. tall with broad shoulders. His silvery blonde hair and fair complexion gives him an almost otherworldly beauty, and he looks like righteousness personified in his shiny armor with his sword hanging at his hip.

I was born in the year 1415, when the world was still in the Dark Ages. The name of my mother, which I found out as I grew older, was Liara. My mentor met her as he was travelling through the lands of Mistone. Since he was a paladin it was his duty to seek out evil wherever it roamed instead of letting it come to him. He stopped in that small nameless village after days of riding to find some shelter from the night. There was a slightly larger building in the village, something he would assume to be the council hall or inn of the village, sometimes it worked both ways. It might have been a fine building once but the traces of time had begun to show it's mark on the building, in fact the whole village.It wasn't a strange sight to Malcom who had seen countless of these places. He went insdie the inn and found it alsmot empty. There were some patrons in dark corners of the inn, but still in looked depressingly empty. He noticed a thin girl cleaning an old, worn table. She couldn't have been older than tweenty and might have been a real looker, but famine had marked her with hollow cheeks and restless eyes.

- Do you have any rooms for the night milady?
- ...Yes, but we can't server any food, only ale, sir, she said with a tired tone in her voice
- I see, well then I...

Malcom was interrupted by a child screaming behind the bar disk, and looked behind it. His eyes grew large as he saw the infant cying on the floor. th child couldn't be more than one yean and looked awfully pale and thin for a toddler. But that wasn't what caught Malcoms attention. The child had silvery strains of hair on it's head and crystal blue eyes that struck him with awe. He had only seen a handful Aasimars in his life but he knew one when he saw it. That intense look, no question about it. As he looke into the eyes of the toddler he had a revelation. A revalation that he must save this child from the gruesome fate it would meet in this village. The woman came and picked, what seemed to be her child, up and started to rock him in her arms.

- Shh, little Zidjian, shh
- May I ask... who is the father of this child?
- Father? His father is the most handsome man I've ever met, a bard with the sweetest voice. But he isn't around and I doubt that he knows that little Zidjian even exists. Poor thing, he' not getting enough food these days, and I'm beginning to doubt he'll survive the winter, she said with tears in her eyes.
- I see, Malcom said, I might be able to change that. If you let me take care of the child I promise you that he'll survive under the shelter of Toran.

The woman looked stunned at the propsition of leaving her child to this unknown man. But she then looked closer and saw and golden chain hanging around his neck with an ankh attached to it.

- Let...let me think about it...

That night Liara couldn't sleep. She thought all night of what that paladin had said. She didn't want to hand over her child, but she also knew that his chances of surviving the winter were slim, especially when the food was so scarce. In the morning she went to the man's room with her child sleeping in her arms and wrapt in a blanket. She explained the situation to the paladin and she there learnt that his name was Malcom and that he would foster the child to be a paladin.

~13 years later~

I had been out of the temple for two months now new world that had opened too me were still amazing. I knew that Huang Jin was an interesting town, but it's nothing like being out in the open world. I still remember how excited I was when Malcom said it was time for me to follow him. He said he would return with me to Mistone, to a place called Fort Llast. Apparently there was another temple there that he was stationed at, and so I would be. My mind drifted in old memories as we rode on.

During the past years since Malcom left me at the temple, the clerics and the other paladins stationed there, had taught me what they could, but still I saw Malcom as my mentor. even though he only spent two months in Huang Jin each year, I was more familiar with him than any of the other paladins. he taught me how to hold a sword for the first time and how to draw my first letters. He was more like an introduction into both of these areas, and he was the one I wanted to make proud.

The days at the temple were good enough I guess. I had got to know many other paladins to be, two of them named Samuel and Lauf. samuel were a tall boy, but he didn't quite reach up to my height, with reddish hair and that used to play pranks and practical jokes when we were younger. But he'd gotten rid of that habit since he knew I was a far to honest soul to play along, and I alwasy told on him to the clerics. Lauf on the other hand was quite short silent boy with dark hair and arms and legs like young trees. I har been at the temple longer than any of them but they had been there long enough for it to not matter anymore. They knew I was diffrent than them, but they didn't mind. My since of justice had often gotten us in trouble. One time, when we where at the market, i saw a boy stealing from an older gentleman, but I was not going to let the boy get away with it just because he was young. The whole thing endedwith me returning the gold to the old man and the boy getting a smack in the face from him. He should be grateful that I took him instead of the guards. Now he just got a smack on the face instead of losing a hand. The previous year, Samuel and Lauf both left with their mentors to travel with, just as I did now.

I was to some degree spared from the influence of the Dark Ages since I was born five years before it ended. I couldn't see the sky, but neither could anyone else. The day the sky cleared I was to young to comprehend what really happened, I just remeber that life seemed to become easier for the people and the darkness that always was around had cleared. I then thought, in my young and simple mind, that it was the working of Toran. In some was I still do.

The temple always seemed to have food so I wasn't starving, unlike the vast majority of the people. I was always very excited and happy whenever Malcom came to visit, but he also told me about the worl outside. Ohh, how I longed and ached to be out there cleansing the world from evil and bringing hope to people. It was as if my whole being was drawn to doing the bidding of Toran, the bidding of good. I thought it strange that I reacted that way when, but then again maybe this was a sign from Toran that this was the path for me.

I looked up again an saw that we had reached the ship that would take us to Fort Llast andthe continent of Mistone. As the ship slowly drifted away from the docks, I found myself shivering, something I almost never do, even though it's cold. But then it came to me, I was shivering with excitment. Ecitment that my road to become a paladin had finally started.

~4 years later~

Malcom seemed to be excited as I stood before the cleric in the temple of Toran in Fort Llast. the day form to take up my sword in the name of Toran had finally come. As I swore the the oaths I glanced at Malcom, His hair had started to go grey, but it was nowhere near my silvery mane. The old walrus moustache still clung to his upper lip like an old, dear friend. My mind drifted and i though of the time after I came to Fort Llast. When i had arrived i had shivered for this moment, now, two years later i was completly calm. During these four years I had grown, not just physically, but mentally as well. My devotion in Toran was greater than ever before and he had helped me and Malcom face the evils under these years. It was also during this time Malcom told me of my true heritage. I'd always known that I was diffrent, but this came as a chock to me. That I possessed divine blood, that would certainly explain a thing or two, when i look back at it. But nevertheless, I am who I am and i will follow toran no matter what. After I had found out about my heritage we visited the village at where Malcom had came across me. I saw her, my mother, but I didn't dare to approach. I akso saw to youngster a boy and a girl, looking to be fifteen and thirteen years old. I turned away away from the scene. There was no real reason for me to visit anyway. I had my devotion to Toran and was happy with that. I didn't want to interrupt my mother's "new" life with my presence, so I left.

I found myself taking the last oath and realised that I was now a member ofthe order. Malcom came and gave me a big bear hug.

- Congratulations m'boy, you're now a member of the order, he said with a grin.
- Thank you Malcom, for everything...

~2 years later~

I've recently arrived at the town of Port Hempstead after being on the road for two months. Under my two years as a paladin I only met Malcom once. His hair and moustache was completly gray but he seemed to be in good spirit. I pray to Toran that he watch over that old man. As for me...a paladins work is never done.

// 1. I, the player, have read the dogma of Toran and intend to follow it to it's full extent with my character.

2. Zidjian is to the full belief that he shall smite evil and fight injustice wherever it lurks and help those that are in need whenever he can. A promise is a sacred bond that only can be broken under extreme circumstances, as to save the life of another person. It's in times of good deeds that he really feels that the work of Toran is done.

3. He is usually dressed in a silvery fullplate with a blue cloak, with an ankh hanging around his neck, or in simple robes. He uses a longsword, the weapon of his deity and also wears the colours of his deity gold, silver and blue.

Feel free to come with pointers if anything is missing or seems out of place.

Last edited by Tai'dashar : 07-21-08 at 06:33 AM.
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Old 07-20-08, 04:09 PM #2
darkstorme
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Default Re: New Character Submission - Zidjian

Hi there, Tai'dashar.

You've got the first statement down there, but we need to see all three of the numbered dogma statements before a formal review can take place.

You can find an example of these statments here.

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Old 07-20-08, 04:51 PM #3
Tai'dashar
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Default Re: New Character Submission - Zidjian

Edited the dogmas.
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Old 07-21-08, 10:14 AM #4
osxmallard
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Default Re: New Character Submission - Zidjian

Your character has been approved.

Server address is west.layonara.com
Password is layoplayer

Some final notes on character creation:
  • Please note that racial adjustments for players with subraces are skin based and thus get applied after getting in game.
  • Only two ability scores can be less than 10 and only one can be less than 8 after racial adjustments
  • Brownies, when selecting a head, the head you choose on the halfling selection will correspond to that numbered head for elves (for example, clicking right 6 times on the head selection during character creation will take the 6th head when clicking right on the elf creation)
  • Half-giants and ogres, please ask for a GM (type /dm Anyone here?) if you would like to change to a custom skin.


Welcome to Layonara.

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