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08-20-05, 05:26 AM
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#1 | | |  Telioun Trewind
Name: Telioun Trewind
Age: 172
Class(es): Druid
Race: Elf
Subrace: N/A
Alignment: True Neutral
Deity: Folian S’pae
Background:
Born in 1215, Telioun was born to an Elven household living in Mistone. He led a happy life up until he’s 4th birthday, when he’s parents decided to travel to Liken. To reach Liken they would have to go through 'The High Forest’. All was going well until they ran into a huge group of Ogres chopping down trees. The Trewind family attempted to sneak past, but to no avail. A small group of wood elves who hadn’t escaped to Voltrex arrived to protect the forest. Telioun’s parents were caught in the cross fire.
While the wood elves checked for survivors, they stumbled across young Telioun. Walking up to the crying and distraught Telioun, one fo the wood elves pulled out a knife. Staring for a few seconds then thrusting the knife towards the infant. That would have been the end of Telioun if it were not for a panther biting the wood elf’s arm. The wood elves were shocked that a creature of nature would attack them, the defenders of nature. The panther and the wood elves stared at each other for what seemed a very long time.
The Wood elves turned and left. Maybe it was true that Wood elves could talk to animals... Telioun, shaking with fear stared at the panther. The panther rubbed he’s head against Telioun, showing the young boy that he was not going to hurt him. Then something weird happened. Telioun heard a voice in he’s head. It wasn’t very clear at first, but after a few minutes it became as clear as day.
The voice said “Do not worry young one, you are safe now. My name is Kray. Do not be afraid. I will look after you.”
Telioun has grown into a strong Druid, protecting high forest. The panther that had saved him had died many years ago, but there was always one son of Kray that would always stand by Telioun. Krays son, Terrauq was the first, then Terrauqs son Torran. Telioun has always been guided by he's close bond with the panthers. Telioun has a way with the creatures of the forest, and he’s skills with a bow is as swift as a panthers pounce.
It was in this year of 1387 that Telioun decided that the forest no longer needed him. A small group of wood elves had returned to 'The High Forest’. It was on one dark night, when a strange shadow covered Layonara that Telioun and Terrath finally decided to leave 'The High Forest’, wandering the grasslands aimlessly, Telioun and Terrath stumbled upon a small village called Hlint....
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08-21-05, 06:05 AM
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#2 | | Mind Flayer Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: In Hollow Halls beneath the fells
Posts: 1,188
Thanks: 3
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
| RE: Telioun Trewind
Characters are not allowed any claims to nobility, so maybe you could simply change it so that his parents were relatively rich?
Also I'm not sure how I feel about a panther living for hundreds of years. I would ask you to change it so that the panther would live as long as panthers normally do and Telioun's companion would always be the child of his previous companion? You can come up with other solutions too or attempt to justify the long lifespan somehow.
__________________
Make your choice, adventurous Stranger;
Strike the bell and bide the danger,
Or wonder, till it drives you mad,
What would have followed if you had.
- C.S. Lewis
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08-21-05, 07:43 AM
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#4 | | Mind Flayer Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Pontefract, West Yorkshire, UK
Posts: 1,053
Thanks: 27
Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
| RE: Telioun Trewind
Hmmm sorry about this but there is one more problem that I can see and that is all this was supposed to happen when Telioun was only 4 years old is that right? Well personally I think thats pretty young for even a human kid to think about pulling out a knife and standing upto a bunch of woodelves who he's just seen slaughter his parents...even if he fully understands what has just happened it still seems pretty unrealistic to me. If you consider that elves don't reach adulthood til around 110 or so, 4 is really still a baby. I'd ask you to increase his age so that the story fits better. If you do I'm sure he'll be approved.
__________________
Steve
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
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08-21-05, 07:59 AM
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#6 | | Mind Flayer Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Pontefract, West Yorkshire, UK
Posts: 1,053
Thanks: 27
Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
| RE: Telioun Trewind
Approved. Welcome to Layonara.
The server IP is 64.127.106.68 and Layonara can be found under Roleplay on Gamespy.
The server password is layoplayer
__________________
Steve
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
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