Excerpts from the journal of Arkolio de'Averlain

[Pseudonym]

Following are excerpts from the journal of Arkolio de’Averlain;

Arrived in the township of Hlint with Charlotte today - it’s a strange
place. Seems some sort of way-station for all sorts of adventuring folk.
Within an hour I had met a greater range of races, nationalities and
professions than all my previous years! Charlotte was as wide-eyed as me I
think although she did her best to act worldly and cosmopolitan. The whole
place, whilst really not much bigger than a hamlet, contains more sights and
wonders than I had previously dreamed possible.

Being new to town and short of funds I asked about the place where someone
like myself, handy with a blade, might find some employment. Well, the job
offers rolled in! Recovering stolen tax records, collecting goblin ears,
delivering mail and finding an array of pelts for a fur trader to name a
few. Seems easy money - my favourite kind!

[Pseudonym]

I met a fellow by the name of Tempartiar Gayle earlier today heading into
the Hlint cemetery. I had briefly considered relieving him of his money
purse but there was something in his stance, some confidence and assuredness
that made me hesitate. Anyway, he must have noticed me noticing and we got
to chatting. He was headed down into the crypts under the cemetery searching
for skeleton knuckles of all things! He invited me to join him - I was
reluctant at first but after his assurances that it would be 'worth my
while’ I decided to go along. It was great and I’m very glad I did.
Tempartiar or 'Temp’ as he asked to be called wasn’t such a bad sort for a
priest - nothing like my brother Haugrim. He had a sense of humour and
didn’t try and sell his religion to me the whole time. All in all a decent
fellow. He even laughed when I explained my theory on the gods - that they
were all a bunch of old seniles carrying out cosmic jests on us mortals to
relieve the boredom of their dotage. Somewhat different to my brother who
would quickly become enraged when I touted my theories in public. Temp even
let me keep all the gold we found down in the crypts - saying these
creatures had departed the great cycle and had no need for material wealth.
Whatever. I was several hundred gold coins the richer after our little
excursion - he could keep the knuckles!

[Pseudonym]

Today I received a mission from a little half-man named Ronar to fetch a
goblin chieftan’s head to him. Didn’t seem like such a hard ask - several
times I have ventured into the lands east of Hlint and hunted the goblin
scum that seem to infest the place without a problem. As I traveled the
short distance to the caves where the goblin chief was reputed to reside I
met up with a ranger by the name of Roy Ainsworth who had also received a
charter to kill the goblin chief. He too was a recent arrival in Hlint. What
a disaster! Immediately after we entered we were beset on all sides by
goblins, these much fiercer than the ones we had encountered previously.
Fighting our way deeper into the caves I was forced to use my entire stock
of healing potions that I had bought from a priestess in Hlint. After
sharing the tenth and last (expensive) potion with my new acquaintance we
decided we were outmatched by the goblin scum and decided discretion was the
better part of valour and we retreated - our tails between our legs. 500
gold coins worth of potions the poorer Roy and I parted ways. Hmmmmm.

[Pseudonym]

This afternoon I was wandering around Hlint with my sister Charlotte and we
encountered a paladin (paladins, self righteous, high and mighty, bast .
.mumble, mumble) by the name of Tarradon something-or-other searching for
companions to accompany him on some mission involving rooting out a nest of
bandits. I figured bandits = gold, and I convinced Charlotte to come along
too. Also joining us were a cute lass named Myrr and my high maintenance
ranger friend Roy from a few days ago. I cannot remember exactly where we
travelled over the course of the next few days - it was a blur. Through
forests, mountains, deserts and swamps we wandered high and low. Tarradon
the golden and mighty paladin might have been searching for bandits but,
whatever - the gold we found was great! That was my only concern. If only
shining-light, my-way-or-else holy warrior knew I was but one step removed
from the bandits he was hunting . . .

[Pseudonym]

Today I tried to make myself a batch of arrows. I had picked up some falcon
feathers and some hickory sticks and thought how hard can it be? By the
senile gods - what a trial! I resolve from this point on to never begrudge
the merchant who asks for his three gold coins in exchange for 99 arrows!

[Pseudonym]

Met up with a group today gathered around the local inn at Hlint who were
headed for a place called Haven mines. There were about eight of us altogether
and although the place sounded dangerous I figured I could just hang out
near the back of the group out of harm’s way. I seem to have developed quite
the knack for firing arrows into melee when my foe is least expecting it and
catching them in particularly vital spots. It’s a bit sneaky but effective!
I remember the names of Beli Tenker, Gelden, Finola (and her bear!), two fellows by the
name of Erik plus a couple of others accompanied me into the mines. Never
had I expected that many ogres to exist in the whole wide world let alone in
one place! We battled our way deeper and deeper into the mines eventually
confronting a chieftan that seemed to be running the place. A mighty battle
ensued and although our group was eventually victorious, three of my new
companions fell in in the chaos of combat. Sad. Sadder still was the lack of
opportunity to loot their corpses. It was the first time I have learnt about
the interesting workings of life, death and the void between in these lands
of Layonara.

[Pseudonym]

Haugrim, Charlotte and I met a young - well young by elven standards anyway - priestess by the neame of Serissa a couple of weeks ago. She wanted an escort to her home of Pranzis and Haugrim was keen to visit anyway and see firsthand the damage supposedly sustained in the city. Charlotte and I decided to tag along, having little better to do. I had spent most of my accumulated funds in the last couple of days . . . I really can’t remember where it all went. All I remember through the haze is lots of alcohol, scantily clad women of loose morals , dancing on the bar, more ale and wine, more women and . . . where did all the money go?

Anyway, the journey to Pranzis was pleasant enough. We encountered little trouble, nothing that the four of us could not handle. Haugrim insisted we rout every group of bandits we encountered including a dangerous group of bird-men that crossed our path. We set sail to Pranzis, via Fort Himlad where I still had some mail to deliver for Postmaster Vale, and found the city in smoking ruins. The temple to Rofirien still stood, albeit somewhat worse for wear, and it was there we met two colourful characters in whose company we were to spend the next couple of weeks. Barion, a warrior and Rakay, a half-orc barbarian. I especially like Rakan, a simple enough fellow but with a good sense of humour and a direct and simple approach to life that I understood and to which I could relate. The chasm between our relative intellects was not a barrier for a newly formed friendship. We spent the next couple of weeks battling various tribes of nasties including ogres and giants. I personally have no trouble with either race . . . the loot was great!

[Pseudonym]

I finally completed the task set for me by Mage Dalton of Fort Llast. He had been onto me for weeks trying to get some Will-o-Wisp essence for who-knows-what reason. I'd been putting it off - mainly due to laziness - but made my way out there yesterday with a bard by the name of Karn I had met a week or so earlier. We had to fight a few lizardmen in the swamps but retrieved the essence without too much bother.

More importantly, for the last few days I find myself in a state of . . . flusteredness? to which I am very unaccustomed. I have never had too much trouble attracting the attention of the fairer sex. I'll be the first to admit there are many men getting about out there that are better looking than my good self, however I've never lacked a female companion when the desire to have one struck me. Simple farm girls were always easily impressed with the 'bad-boy' image I had perfected. Town ladies, bored wit hthe lack of attention paid by their merchant husbands were no more difficult to woo. It has always been just a matter of finding the right bait for the hook.

A week ago I met a woman by the name of Muireann, a priestess *sigh*. However, she was as different to my boorish clerical brother as black is to white, or more appropriately, white to black. Fiesty, funny, a whirlwind in battle, men tripping over themselves to obey her every whim, she is gorgeous beyond mere words . . . suffice to say, I had a new target for my rakish charms! I decided on the brash, confident, never-do-well persona which had worked effectively numerous times on priestesses in the past. Any joy? Nothing! Every witticism I summoned she bested. Every lewd comment I made was either thrown back in my face or worse, it was made obvious she was far from tempted. I found myself thinking about her firstly at odd times during the day. I was almost opened from sternum to groin by a sword-wielding orc in the woods when I found myself day-dreaming about Miss Muireann! Then the thoughts were upon me at night as well. I had lured a barmaid at the Wild Surge inn back to my room there and was in the process of . . . well, in the process and bam . . . there's the face of this woman floating in my minds eye again! I ended up ushering the confused barmaid out of the room and spent the rest of the night formulating ideas to win this priestess - this vision of beauty - to my bed.

Yesterday, my opportunity presented itself. I had decided to accompany Muireann and Eghaas Treebringer for a short trip to a lake Muir knew for a bit of a dip. During the walk there, as had become standard practice during the last week, Muireann was having fun at my expense and letting me know how very far I was from wooing her when I had an inspiration! I had a new plan. I had been going about this the wrong way the whole time. She had seen her fill of arrogant adventurers and over-confident rogues . . . the way to get this woman into my bed was going to be through a totally different tact. I quickly decided what Muireann really wanted - at a subconcious level at any rate - was an innocent. I think she has become so jaded from her own . . .waywardness in the past that interaction with an 'innocent' would open up that part of her heart that had left such innocence behind years ago. I think she remembers her own innocence lost many years ago and longs to connect with it again. It was perfect. All I had to do was convince her my brashness of the past week was really only a clumsy mask for my innocent, glossy-clean inner-self and she would lap it up . . . and it worked a charm.

Within 5 minutes, I had her convinced that my behaviour from the last week was some kind of 'macho' shield I had erected to hide my real self behind. She swallowed it all up! The clumsier and more boyish I got with my advances and flatteries, the closer she got to me. Within an hour Eghaas had been dismissed - her thinking his brush-off was her idea no less - and we were alone. We spent the rest of the day together, me gradually - not so quickly that she became suspicious - opening up my 'real' self to her. I would have bet any amount of gold that she would have been warming my bed that night . . .

Ii is at this point that I found myself a little flustered and confused. At the end of a brilliant day with a beautiful woman swimming in a perfect lake setting, I suddenly found myself not wanting to . . . wham, bam, thank-you maam . . . as had been my intent. Had my deception become so involved and convoluted that I had started to convince myself that I wanted more than just sleeping with this woman? At the end of our day together Muireann told me that she didn't want to rush our burgeoning relationship, and I found myself nodding in agreement!!!

What am I doing!?!?

[Pseudonym]

Next day . . . another day spent thinking about Muireann . . . this is not good. I think I might have to hit the road for a little while, clear my head and get my sense of perspective back . . .

[Pseudonym]

Another day of confusion. I had decided to keep clear of Muireann for a couple of days in order to get my head straight for the continuation of the grand seduction, however, of course who should I run into by the pond in Hlint, but the woman herself. She saw me before I had a chance to make myself scarce. It’s funny, one moment I was minding my own business, walking down the main street in Hlint - founding member and current President of the hedonistic, selfish, womanising, Arkolio de’Averlain Appreciation Society and the next . . . blushing, bumbling idiot - fawning all over her. That would be fine, a bit of fawning was going to be part of my seduction plan . . . only problem, I wasn’t acting.

She mesmerises, hypnotizes, enchants me. Is it an enchantment? Have I been the subject of some sort of charm? I followed her to her temple in Leilon like a little puppy -panting at her heels. At one point on the road to Leilon we were attacked by the biggest wild boar I have ever seen. Arkolio a month ago would have been running for all he was worth in the opposite direction - an approach to combat that has held me in good stead my entire life. Did I do that this time? No, I threw my self between Muireann and the beast like the lovestruck fool I fear I am becoming. I was lucky to survive this rash of nobilty/stupidity.

We eventually arrived at the temple of Mist in Leilon . . . what a sight. Muireann is the perfect mortal representative of this Goddess. Fiery, chaotic, temperamental, beautiful, powerful . . . she, and her Goddess, are all these things. I found myself enjoying being at the centre of this tempest with Muireann at my side. I have never had much time for any of the Gods but this was . . . dare I admit, exciting. Thrilling. Momentous. Every one of my senses was alive and throbbing both with the power of the Goddess in the air and the presence of Muir next to me. It is getting harder and harder to remind myself that it is my goal to bed this woman and then be on my way. Arkolio de’Averlain wasn’t made for love. It is not my thing. Love leads to pain. What am I going to do? I’m going to go and find a nice, plump, docile farmer’s daughter or wife that doesn’t challenge me, or my idea of me, in the slightest way.

I wonder what Muireann will be doing tomorrow? I saw some flowers as we headed into Leilon by the side of the road that she might like . . . NO. No flower picking. That’s not me. Drinking, whoring, debauchery. That’s me. That’s right.

[Pseudonym]

A little bit of 'normality' . . . Haugrim had some business that he needed a hand with. Turns out he needed some help dealing with some ogres outside of Krandor. It was a bit of mindless killing . . . just what I needed. I saw Muir earlier today but we chatted only briefly before I had to meet up with Haugrim. She looked lovely.

Lovely?
When did Arkolio de'Averlain start using words like lovely?
When did Arkolio de'Averlain start referring to himself in the third person?
Arkolio de'Averlain is going to have a lie down now.

[Pseudonym]

I grow weary of starting each journal entry with “Another day of confusion . . .”
Is it love with Muir?
Do I desire her body or her heart?
Am I deceiving her into believing I feel love when it is only lust, or, am I deceiving myself into believing I feel lust when it is really love?
What a tangled web I have woven . . .

I left her today after her declaration that she does not love me.
So?
What do I care?
Onto the next maiden. Charade over. Great. Good.
I can stop wasting my time. Fare well. See you later. Whatever.

I had a wander through the red light caverns near Hlint with Karn after leaving Muir. I enjoy the bard’s sense of humour and irreverent approach to this mortal coil that is a mirror to my own. I fear I was not as stimulating and amusing a travelling companion myself however . . . my thoughts were still in turmoil. The goblins which I had routed some weeks ago had slunk back into the cavern complex and clearing them out again was a welcome diversion. Karn and I met a young half-ogre (?) or half-something down in the caves by the name of Hoss. He proved to be of limited intellectual discourse and amusement to Karn and myself but was undeniably useful cannon fodder for goblin archer attack as I collected the spoils of his kills! I love newcomers to Hlint, they have no idea how much gold some creatures carry and I can normally skim at least double my rightful share from any looting in a dungeon foray!

From the goblin caves we wandered around the Sielwood Forest for a bit, fighting the various nasties that tend to lurk in the vicinity. My heart really wasn’t in it however. Her face was constantly before me. Every minute in the forest was a minute I could instead have been by her side . . .

Seeking further distraction, I parted company with Karn and Hoss and wandered over to the township of Krandor. I knew Muir was in Hlint and I was wanting to avoid her . . . I didn’t need the aggravation. I was loitering near the crypts - sometimes grieving relatives will leave coins or trinkets at a loved one’s grave site - when I encountered a woman who introduced herself as Dalvenus. Seemed okay, my sister would have liked her. Dalvenuw was taller than I, muscular, clad in plate armour and wielding a maul that looked heavier than me too! She explained that she was heading into the crypts to retrieve some ashes for a local boy in Krandor. Whatever. It was unlikely that I was going to bump into Muir down there so I came along.

Lesson in humility. What we encountered in the Krandor Crypts was unlike anything I had ever seen in my venturings into the cemetery in Hlint. Ghouls,’Burning Men’, Skeleton Chieftans that threw fireballs and acid storms like archmages! My knack of firing arrows into an opponent’s vulnerable parts availed me little. The undead we encountered seemed immune to my 'special’ way of attacking. We eventually retrieved the ashes for the Krandor boy, more through luck and good fortune in battle than by skill and strategy. Whatever . . . I found more than 2,000 gold coins in the crypts! Hooray! - a fortune by anyone’s standards for a couple of hours 'work’ . . . Hooray! . . . why then, don’t I feel happy?

Muireann . . . .

[Pseudonym]

. . . . Muireann

Well, it’s happened. I’ve finally bedded her. Had my way. It . . .she . . . was amazing. She truly is like the Goddess she serves, Wild, tempestuous, unquenchable. It was like nothing I had experienced in my times with countless other girls and women before. The world ceased to exist outside the space of our entwined bodies. For the first time in my life, a foe could have snuck upon me unawares and I would have been blissfully ignorant. But, it is done. Time to hit the road again, no strings attached. See ya later. Nothing more to be done here . . .

Great theory.

One little problem. I have fallen in love. For real.

Last night, for the first time, as I held Muir in my arms, the words I whispered in her ear were not calculated and planned. They were not spoken with an agenda. These words of love were also words of truth.

How do I feel?

One, elated beyond any joy I have known before. I feel like singing at the top of my voice and shouting my happiness to the heavens. Raise the senile Gods from their slumber with the echoes of my laughter.

Two, I still feel confusion. Now that I have won my 'prize' I feel a . . . guilt? . . . that it was obtained through such cunning planning and manipulation. I feel as if I have sullied something that should be so clean and pure and shining. Guilt from Arkolio the remorseless?

What is becoming of me? This morning I passed on the chance to a trip to Haven mines, always a profitable venture for the . . . possibilty . . . not even the likely probability . . . of spending more time with Muireann. A woman over adventure and gold for Arkolio the Carefree?

Also, for the first time in my life, I have offered a prayer to the Gods. As I lay in Muir’s arms, I invoked a silent prayer of thanks to the Goddess Mist for the opportunity to share a place in the heart of one of her priestesses. A prayer to a Goddess!!?! A prayer from Arkolio the Agnostic?

With whom can I share these concern? My friends, Roy, Eric, Karn? I fear they would make a joke of my feelings and worries. My brother? Not likely. Asking a priest of Rofirien for his views on my relationship with a priestess of Mist? Hmmmm.

Why do I so fear these effects of love?

To be completely honest, for the entirety of my life there has been little love and concern for anyone else other than myself.
Is this selfishness a habit I have to break, or is it . . . the real me?

[Pseudonym]

Earlier today I ventured into the goblin infested red light caverns near Hlint. It was the first time I had been back since I was part of the group that slew the goblin leader weeks ago and the first time solo. My foray was without notable incident, my skills have improved enough over the last few months to the point that the goblin warriors that I encountered posed little problem . . . up until I found myself on the lowest level suddenly surrounded by about twenty of the little savages! It was the first time in weeks that I thought to myself - uh oh - in over my head here. I eventually escaped . . . half a dozen healing potions and one (very expensive) stoneskin gem later. There wasn’t even much gold to be found as compensation, maybe a couple of hundred coins at most and I would have had to spend at least that to replace my healing potions.

Perhaps the most valuable thing I took out of the caverns this venture was a lesson . . . I am a . . . capable warrior at best. Where I truly shine is as a support to other fighters. Does this 'limitation’ bother me? Not really. What’s the appeal about standing in the front line of a battle going toe to toe with someone or something that desires nothing more than seeing you splattered on the end of it’s club? I have confirmed I am more than comfortable up near the back of the party - out of harms way - firing my arrows into the melee. Let the brave (and stupid) paladin have the glory and the bard’s songs - i’ll be content with the gold . . . and the girl.

Speaking of which, saw Muireann in town after my little adventure. Again, one thing lead to another and before too long we couldn’t get out of Hlint quick enough and as soon as we were in a secluded spot we were all over each other. This time we coupled on top of a windswept mountain near Haven . . . why she prefers these exotic locations I don’t know. I don’t feel the need to ask such questions! I don’t question my fortune. Perhaps it has something to do with her devotion to Mist? Whatever!

[Pseudonym]

I had to run an errand for package master Freya today . . . package master? Seems a somewhat grandiose title for a pretty mundane sort of job in my opinion! Anyway, I headed off to Fort Hope with a delivery for somebody named Larry. Muir came along for the trip which passed without notable incident. A bit of a shame really, she sure is something to watch in the heat of battle. Almost as thrilling as watching her in the heat of the bedroom . . . note the usage of the word 'almost’. As my mother used to say, it’s a little-big word!

Spent the night with Muir again, this time by a waterfall. Was amazing and wonderful although I did wake in the morning feeling as if I had come off second best in a fight with a Malar tiger. The first time she started up with the scratching and the biting I must confess I was a bit taken aback. Now, i’m quite getting into it!

Only other thing of note, while Muir and I were reclining by the waterfall . . . afterwards . . . a man she addressed by the name of Shamur happened by. Was definitely some awkwardness between the two of them. I was tempted to ask about it but refrained. Already I know that nothing raises that girl’s hackles like an insinuation of possessiveness or jealousy on my part. Actually, referring to her as a 'girl’ does so as well!! Anyway, I left it alone. I had tasted Muir’s fiery nature in a very, very positive way already that day and really didn’t need to be on the receiving end of it’s flip side!

[Pseudonym]

I’ve ruined everything.

Today, I told Muireann the truth. What in the hells was I thinking? I was looking at her . . .I was awash with an immense love . . . I was happily afloat on a sea of warmth and togetherness, then . . . I capsized the ship.

One moment I was looking into Muir’s eyes, the next thing I knew I was telling her of my plan of seduction. If we are . . .if we were to continue to be together, I had got it into my head that I had to be totally honest with her - no matter the consequence.

So I did. I told her that initially it was her body that drew her to me and I only had the intention of bedding her and then being on my way. I told her that I felt jealousy towards other men in her life, both of the past and the present. I told her it was difficult for me to 'feel’ more love for her than I knew she felt in return for me. I told her of my fears and insecurities regarding her Goddess. I told her it was important, no matter the consequences, that she knew the truth of my 'wooing’, so that if we were to have a future it was a future that started with a clean slate.

She didn’t take it well.

[Pseudonym]

// Just a post to get me off the rank of goblin welp . . . Goblin welp? Why doesn’t Leanthar just slap me across the face and be done with it!?!! *looks indignant, mutters* Goblin welp indeed . . .

[Pseudonym]

Saw Muir again. It was not a planned encounter, after a sleepless night I decided to go spend some thinking time over by the lake near Blackford Castle . . . the site of our first kiss. Who knows if it was fate but that’s there she was at that time.

I shall try to the best of my ability to recollect the conversation . . .
There she was, never more beautiful to me than right then and there.
Me: May I . . . interrupt?
She nodded, not looking at me.
Me: Muir, all night I have been searching for words to say . . . words of apology, words to explain how I feel . . . searching for justifications for my behaviour . . .
Muir: You owe me nothing
(as if you’re going to let me off that easily)
Me: There are no words that lessen the . . . baseness of my behaviour . . . no words that make my lies to you easier to bear . .
Muir: No
(I wasn’t getting a good feeling at this point)
Me: You deserve a greater apology than I can manage to put into words, yet . . . I say to you I am sorry.
Muir: And your jealousy of Mist?
Me: I am 19 years on this world, I cannot be perfect . . . but I can promise you I can try.
Muir: Didn't you promise that once already? And yet . . .
Me: Aye, I made a promise . . . I made a promise to an unknown woman who was fair of face and fair of form . . . now I make a promise to the woman I love.
Muir: Do you actually love me?
Me: Yes Muir
(there it was, all out on the line)
Me: Whether it be a love that is destined to be forever one-sided . . .
(let’s hope not)
Muir: You could live with that?
(let’s hope not)
Me: Life without you is not an option, I have been asleep for 19 years Muir . . . with you, I feel as if I have finally awoken . . .
(nice one Ark!)
Muir: I can't help but wonder how many times words such as these were spoken without truth, I trusted you against my better judgment. I expected you to leave after the first time.
Me: Aye, I betrayed that trust, that was my intent.
Muir: I would have killed you for using me.
Me: And then, then I discovered who the woman was beneath that form. . you Muir. I set out to woo a nameless woman, one who was nothing to me . . . I was not planning on love.
(It would be simpler without it)
Muir: Yet you told me that is what it was...
Me: Aye, I told that woman whatever I thought she needed to hear
Muir: What do you want from me Ark?
Me: I want to see your smile Muir. I want to hear your laugh. I want to be the reason.
Muir: You did and you were, but it wasn't enough for you...
Me: I want that to be the case . . . with no secrets.
Muir: You questioned me
Me: Aye. I had no right. I think of you with another man . . . and I think of . . . violence against that man.
(Shamur, Eagle, Kiva, her other suitors, they may be warriors but that was no defence against the crimson smile I would give them as they slumbered unawares)
Muir: There has been no man since you, There easily could have been if I wished it.
Me: Do you not think that is obvious to me with every man that looks at you?
Muir: No, I didn't, I have never really been of interest to men until after I left the Temple. I am not used to it.
Me: Well, you are making up for lost time
(I can’t help myself sometimes, was I trying to get her started?)
Muir: Was that a dig?
Me: No
(yes)
Muir: Because what I did before you is not of your concern...
Me: You are not accountable to any man, least of all me, for your actions, but . . . These admirers . . . it burns me to see them look at you with the same look that I once had . . . It is not fun to watch . .
Muir: Should I hide myself? Scar myself? Would that help?
Me: No Muir, it is not your problem. It is mine.
(Could you wear a veil, that might help?)
Muir: And you, when you flirt. Do you not think it bothers me? Or are you the only one who matters
Me: Muir, there is only you.
Muir: So you say...Yet you flirted with Akki without even asking me how I faired that day. Or did you think I failed to notice that? Karn tried to gently point out to you what you'd done...
(Thanks Karn! If I were attracted to other men maybe I’d notice such things too!)
Muir: Will that happen often Ark?
Me: Akki? I honestly would not be able to point her out in a crowd . . .
(She was naked in the Mist temple when I last saw her. I have no recollection of her face...)
Muir: Don't lie to me
Me: It is truth, There is only you Muir.
Muir: I'm sure you have an excellent memory for womens faces!
Me: I truthfully cannot even remember the conversation with this Akki . . .
Muir: It is second nature to you no doubt . .
(she was sneering)
Me: If it bothers you. you will never have to suffer from it again . .
Muir: I told Jaleel, and half of Hlint we were togther....and it wasn't enough for you.
Me: I cannot be perfect. I can only try to be perfect. Jaleel? I imagine he told the other half anyway . .
Muir: But no, I did not tell Shamur, I had not had chance
(Of course not)
Muir: And yes, he is interested in me
(no kidding)
Me: You never acknowledged me as yur man when I was there . . .
Muir: Nor did you me Ark, I aasumed that is what you wished.
Me: You do not invite such possessive actions Muir
Muir: Is it possessive to express affection for the one you claim to love, or to at least acknowledge them past a common aquaintance
(ouch)
Me: Muir, speak not like that . . . you know that is not true.
Muir: Maybe
Muir: You didn't act like it
Me: Would you have me beg? I would but I know you would treat such an action with scorn . . . yet I would anyway.
Muir: If, and I say if I trust you again and you lie to me I will flay the flesh from your bones as you still live
Me: You would not ever need to . . .
Muir: Will you trail in my wake? Where ever my goddess sends me? Will you live in her shadow?
Me: Mist's shadow? I am a rogue Muir. I like shadows
Muir: You know if she wished you dead I would kill you don't you?
(stop rubbing it in, i get it. And you’d try to kill me, there’s a difference)
Muir: Even if I did love you
Me: Then let us hope I do not offend her.
Muir: I've been told you will destroy me, even if that isn't your intention
Me: Destroy you? How so?
(Karn again? No, I bet it was from another suitor - completely objective i’m sure!)
Muir: By making me choose, By not accepting I am hers first and always.
Me: I know already how that choice would be made . . . It is part of you Muir . . . I would have you no other way.
She looked at my face then, for the first time in the entire conversation. Ifelt brave enough to reach out and caress her cheek.
Muir: Fine Ark....Have it your way....But this is truly it
Me: I have just spoken words Muir . . . little noises that blow away on your Goddesses wind (nice!) . . . but you will see the truth of what I say in my every action.
She nodded, still silent.
Muir: Maybe in time.....
Me: You will see the truth of my words.
Muir: You know that will take time also....
I brought her hand to my lips then and she returned the gesture. Her lips against my skin felt like heaven.
Me: Muir - I touched the place above her heart - You. In here Muir. You are beautiful in here . . . That is the important thing Muir. What is inside . . . and I will show you what's inside Arkolio de’Averlain.
I kissed her then again, very gently upon her cheek.
Me: Goodbye Muir
Muir: Be safe Ark

[Pseudonym]

I'll see if I can make journal entry without making a refernce to Muir . . . oops, just did. This journal is becoming more about her than me. Funny though, I don't mind a bit.

Met a fellow who went by the title of Pendar the Hooded One in Hlint today. What happened to good old fashioned surnames like Smith and Brown? Anyway, somehow one thing led to another and we were trading insults in the middle of main street! I used a couple of my old favourites. Slurs against his mother, a questionable sexuality and his personal hygiene. He did make it easy, he was wearing robes that looked suspiciously like a dress. Eghaas and Muir (oops, did it again!) dived for cover but the taunts were mostly good natured. After trading insults for a little while a group of us, led by Pendar the Skirt Wearer, went to a small cavern complex not far from Hlint to retrieve some Bodak teeth. Everything went pretty well without too much risk to my handsome self (mostly thanks to Muir's (that's three times now!) wards against the negative energy attacks of the undead that infested the place).

We all made our way out without too much mishap and some 500 gold coins the wealthier to boot. Only other thing to report from today involves she who will not be named (for a fourth time at least) which I will save for another day.

[Pseudonym]

Saw Muir in Hlint today. As was her wont, she was seated in the middle of town talking to a couple of others, Barion, whom I had adventured on Rilara a while ago, included. I snuck up on Muir and blew softly on the back of her neck. It was then that another man, Donnchadh by name I was to learn, threateningly put hands to his sword hilt at my approach. Supposedly Donnchadh was newly arrived in Hlint and was a Mist worshipper himself and now self appointed guardian of Muireann. Whatever. Did she stop Donnchadh and say 'No, this is Ark whom I told you about’. Did she acknowledge me as any different to the host of other men that constantly clamber for her attention? Did she give me any sign that she held me in any regard?

I think it was maybe Roy Ainsworth who said 'Never fall in love with a priestess’...

Or Jaleel. No, actually, probably Roy, Jaleel would be more specific and say never fall for a priestess of Mist.

Muir has been telling me for weeks now that she has no place in her heart for love of any man. She has been telling me this in both words and deeds. A few days ago I heard of a fight between Muir and Jaleel, something to do with Jaleel abusing Karn and his preference for members of the same sex. I’m not entirely sure, but anyway, as Jaleel wasn’t around at the time I heard of this confrontation, I wrote a letter to Jaleel warning him to be very careful about with whom he picks his fights.

// Copy below

Later, after I was gone, Jaleel tracked down Muir and wanted to pass on a threat of his own to your truly. Muir said to Jaleel that the letter I wrote had nothing to do with her and if I wanted to go and get myself killed by Jaleel’s blade it was nothing to her. Today as she recounted this confrontation with Jaleel to me I looked in her eyes and saw the truth of her words. Were I to die, it would mean nothing to her.

Only a fool falls in love with a priestess.

Only a ...ed fool.

[Pseudonym]

// Copy of letter to Jaleel.

Jaleel,

A word of warning. When you choose friends and enemies in this life, consider carefully the friends of those you choose to name as foe.

Some of us will not feel the necessity of restricting the thrust of our blade to within the confines of an arena.

As I stated, consider these words very carefully when next you speak to Muireann.

signed,
Arkolio de'Averlain

[Pseudonym]

Two things of note to report from the last couple of days.

I finally recovered the Oil of Vukas for Juanita the horse trader from where she lost it in the Grey Peaks. I accompanied a group of like-minded adventurers from in and around Hlint including Tarradon Duvall, my sister Charlotte - why were they together when I arrived? hmmmm- Grulwz, Jake Saltpetre and a likeable enough dwarf named Alokki. I had heard from various sources that I would find it difficult to retrieve this oil for Juanita as she lost it deep in lands infested by various ogre tribes. I don’t know if we were just lucky or our skills have developed to a point where we have become . . . formidable, but regardless of which, the ogres we encountered fell like so much wheat before our scythes. I survived the entire trip without so much as a scratch! The worst incident I had was I chipped a tooth on some corn bread I had found on one of the ogres bodies . . . serves me right.

The whole trip, over within a couple of days, was very profitable. Between the reward and what I looted off the ogre corpses, I added about 1,500 gold coins to my bank balance! The other good thing about this venture is it gave me some time and perspective to think about the Muir . . . situation.

My grandmother used to tell me story when I was a little boy. The story involved a little boy who used to look after a rich merchant’s flock of sheep. One day the rich merchant invited the little shepherd boy inside his grand manor home. This was very exciting for the boy for though he had worked for the merchant for many years he had never seen inside the man’s home and it was reputed to be filled with wondrous treasures gathered from the far flung corners of the world. The rich merchant allowed the little boy to look through his house of treasures but his permission to do so came with one condition. He gave the boy a chicken egg to carry on the end of a silver spoon as walked around the house with the instruction that he must not drop the egg at all costs. Eager to impress the great and wealthy merchant the shepherd boy made his way around the house, concentrating very carefully on not letting the egg fall from it’s precarious position on the spoon. After several hours the merchant found the shepherd standing in the great hall of his home, the egg intact on the end of the spoon. The boy had not let it fall during his journey through the house. The merchant asked the boy, 'What did you think of my house? What about the great treasures I have on display in my home?’ The shepherd boy answered, 'Sir, I did not see any of these treasures, I was concentrating on not letting the egg fall from the spoon.’

My (long-winded) point? During my excursion to the Grey Peaks I realised I was the shepherd boy. I was concentrating so intently on my goal of winning the heart of Muireann I was blind to the treasures before me.

Maybe she didn’t love me now? Maybe she never would.
Did that change the fact that she was beautiful?
Did it change that she chose to spend time with me?
Did it change the fact that I enjoyed the time I spent with her?
When had I turned into such a worrier that I could not tear my eyes away from some elusive goal and not just enjoy the here and now?

We may end up together for a long time. We may part company tomorrow. Who knows?

I found Muireann in the temple of Mist in Leilon - I really need to buy a warm coat! - she was beautiful and here before me and it confirmed my realisation. I spoke to her at length and it was . . . good. We reached an understanding. Where it goes from here, who can say?

I will not worry and I will enjoy all the treasures I see in the great house as I journey through. If I 'drop the egg’, so be it.

// With apologies to Paolo Coelho!!

[Pseudonym]

Again, a couple of things of note from the last few days.

Some few weeks ago, whilst talking with Muir, she told me of the destruction of the village in which she was born and raised. In the raid her parents were both slain and her sister now missing, possibly murdered, more probably sold into slavery. Muir told me that her Church was conducting investigations and, at the time, I offered to Muir that I could make some enquiries through various sources of my own. When one chooses to lead a . . .shady life . . . one of the benefits is that one tends to make acquaintance all sorts of people who make it their business to know the business of others - reputable or . . . otherwise. I put out the feelers amongst some contacts and spread a little gold to get the wheels turning.

Then, as occasionally happens to those blessed with towering intellects, I had a brilliant idea. On several occasions I have had opportunity to travel with a paladin by the name of Tarradon Duvall. As a general rule, I normally don’t have a lot of time for paladins, however this one is . . . not too boorish. I did grow up with Haugrim, the original Mr Preachy himself after all - I have built up a tolerance over time! Anyway, often I have travelled the wild lands around Mistone in the company of my brother and sister and Tarradon has joined us. He is a proficient bladesman and I have always welcomed another body between my foes and myself in any battle - so he has been welcome each time! On our travels I have noticed a certain . . . fondness developing between Charlotte and Tarradon . . . nothing untowards but often I will see them sharing a secret smile. That’s the good thing about having a paladin interested in your sister - (a) he won’t touch her before there’s a ring on her finger, and (b) no-one else will touch her while he’s around!

So, my brilliant idea is this - I hinted to Tarradon that Charlotte is heavily influenced by what I have to tell her and things could go better for him if he was to help me out with some investigations into the disappearance of Muir’s sister - a win-win situation for all. Between his amusingly furious blushing attacks, he agreed to make some enquiries into the matter through his Church contacts. Now there was not only the Church of Mist investigating and my own somewhat less repuatble network, but also the Church of Roirein! Am I the first genius in history to get these two faiths working towards the same goal!!? I am, just a little, impressed at my own cleverness! In return for his investigations, Tarradon also required me to perform some 'good deeds’ with him in addition to speaking to Charlotte, so we spent the rest of the day ferreting out various bandit nests and lairs of nasties that plagued the common folk . . . I personally think if they are stupid enough to grub out an existence on a farm their entire lives, they deserve little better. However, if that was part of the price to pay, so be it.

The other matter of note is . . . Jaleel. I may have made an enemy there. I wrote a letter when I was in a temper (and had had a little bit too much ale to drink I might add) and he seems unwilling to let it pass . . . Muir and Jaleel seem to have reached some sort of truce or arrangement but Jaleel seems not quite so ambivalent towards yours truly. Today he threatened me and informed me it would bring him no pleasure to inform my brother and sister the news of my death at his blades. I almost laughed in his face. The fool. Does he not realise I am a thief, a liar, a cheat, a bully , a rogue and I do not fight fair. I prefer to engage my challenges as my opponent blissfully slumbers! Jaleel would never even wake to draw his blades . . . When someone picks a fight with Arkolio de’Averlain it won’t be an honourable arena battle with the best swordsman the victor. Also, someone doesn’t fight just one child of Averlain, it doesn’t work that way. If you swing a blow at one of us, you’d better be prepared to receive three blows in return. If Jaleel and I ever do 'battle’, it might not even be my poisoned dagger that takes his life - equal chance it will be the sword of Charlotte or the mace of Haugrim. Maybe even the holy blade of Tarradon Duvall if Charlotte gets dragged into a conflict! Sad part of all this is I don’t even mind Jaleel. The fellow and I used to get on quite well. What does one do? I fear it is maybe too late to resolve this with mere words . . .

Well, that has been my last few days. My last few nights? They have been filled with hours of bliss with Muir . . .

[Pseudonym]

Rather mundane entry today. Usual stories of slaying monsters, accumulating wealth and just generally saving the day for one and all.

One... interesting point I suppose. I happened to meet a fellow by the name of Kiva yesterday by Lake Palden. I'd never met him before but Jaleel had told me once before that he was one of Muir's ex-partners. With my newfound perspective on my . . . relationship with Muir, I was willing to speak to the man in a civil manner and be as pleasant as could be. He verbally attacked me, threatened for me to stay away from Muir and drew his blades when I told him to mind his own business. He certainly didn't have a very high opinion of me and my intentions with Muireann. Now where could he have garnered such an opinion? Only one possible source. Which begs the question, why is she painting such a negative picture of me to a former flame? Hmmmmmmm.

[Pseudonym]

** Journal filled with drunken, illegible scrawl. Only here and there can a reader make out any words.

Muir . . .
Kiva . . .

. . . and at the bottom of the wine soaked page, underlined twice and written twice as large as any of the other text,

LIAR

[Pseudonym]

Well, amazing what a difference a couple of weeks can have on the direction of one’s life . . .

Where to start?

Adventuring? Plenty of it. I have had lots of time on my hands for a hundred and one assorted quests, adventures, forays and explorations. I’ve mined topaz after slaying ogres, travelled the length and breadth of the Berhagen Mountains, crossed the Blood Desert a couple of times, sailed the high seas, collected venom sacks from spiders in the dire woods and battled lizard men in the aptly named fens. I’ve fought alongside wizards, paladins, priests, half-giant druids, elven archers, dwarven berserkers and brownie sorcerors. I’ve collected a king’s ransom in gold and jewels - more money than a year ago I would have ventured existed in all Rilara! I’ve done so many things since Muireann and I permanently parted company . . . actually, perhaps I should have started with the Muir story first.

There is the long version of this story and the short version. Frankly, I am only motivated to pen the abbreviated tale.

Arkolio wants Muireann.
Muireann wants Kiva.
Kiva wants Tegan.
I think I may be the only one missing out in this chain unless Tegan (whom I’ve never even met) secretly wants me.

From Muir’s own lips have I heard the words that if Kiva calls to her, she will come. Simple as that. She tells me that she doesn’t think it likely he will do so, thus why should I care? . . . as if that is relevant at all. I am to put my life, my heart, my everything on hold subject to the whim of another man? How can I be with a woman who would rather be with someone else? This is not even bringing into the equation her feelings for the one named Ardal - a man whose name and place I have had to hear from others.

Am I bitter? Not at all. Muireann has taught me a very, very valuable lesson.

Friendship is for the weak.
Emotion for the misguided.
Fidelity for the foolish.
There will be no place for love in the heart of Arkolio de’Averlain.

[Pseudonym]

What was I saying last time? What a difference a couple of weeks can have on the direction of one’s life . . .

Where to start again?

Adventuring?
Have had my fair share, again with an assortment of individuals from in and around Mistone. Have spent quite a bit of time with Jaleel and Roy - both of whom are often about town when I find myself in Hlint. Both are accomplished fighters and when we travel together, not too many beasties can cause us a whole lot of grief. One . . . unpleasant experience we did have however the other day involved a fairly routine trip to the Broken Forest to help Jaleel clear out some orc bandits that had taken root there. After we had done this task, again without too much mishap, we happened upon a cave entrance which we conjectured might have provided a base of operations for the orcs. Venturing inside we did not encounter any more orcs but instead a host of diseased rats, a plague of oozes and jellies and puddings, and finally, but by no measure least of which, a wyrm. I cannot remember it’s colour - I only saw a hint of darkness rushing towards me before I found myself walking the void road again. A valuable lesson learnt about my own over-confidence and, perhaps just as importantly, that of others.

A similar mishap nearly occurred yesterday in the Grey Peaks fighting some ogres. Another trip to the void was narrowly avoided as I decided discretion was the better part of valor and ran from a melee which had deteriorated for our group quite suddenly. My skulking skills came in very handy. Sticking to the shadows, I snuck past a host of ogres all the way back to Fort Llast without incident. I didn’t even have to share the take as I was looting and everyone else who was there did not possess my knack for hiding and thus perished in a most grisly manner!

Muir?
We have seen a bit of each other recently. She is impossible to avoid really possessing an uncanny talent for turning up wherever I may be. Not that I really mind. Since my . . . epiphany regarding the true nature of love, it has actually been somewhat more relaxed and pleasant to spend time in her company. We have warmed each other’s beds a few times this week, travelled together, fought together and, as to what she does when I am not there, I no longer care.
A few days ago, standing in Hlint, contemplating a journey to Hampshire with Roy I witnessed Muir asking Roy if he would lay down his life to protect hers . . . what a question for her, of all people, to ask someone. I almost slapped her face right then and there, the hypocrite. Again, I must thank her. A month ago if she asked me the same question, like Roy, I would have answered yes, I would. She’d receive a very different answer now. Her choice.

[Pseudonym]

Things are going pretty well with Muireann. It’s kind of funny. For the last few weeks, since she made her feelings clear about the state of our relationship, things have been better. I continue to get 'mixed signals’ from her as to her wants and desires, but since I have officially given up worrying about it, her, the future, whatever; we, together, have generally been happier in each other’s company. She constantly tells me that she doesn’t know whether it is in her ... make up? soul? to love anyone at all. Often it seems she is convincing herself about this as much as me.

An interesting story to tell. Well, a run-in really.

Kiva. Where to start? He’s arrogant and obnoxious. He thinks he’s all that, but to the great majority of people who know him, he isn’t really much at all. Earlier today, in the main street of Hlint, he kept pushing and pushing, wanting me to challenge him to an arena combat. As i’ve said - that’s not how I fight. Toe to toe? Kiva would cut me to ribbons. Yet today it seemed I was being pushed into a corner, in front of Muireann no less, and would have no choice but to fight Kiva. He is intolerable. His thinly veiled threat to 'deal with’ Muir after he had dealt with me in the arena was the last straw ... a fight was inevitable. A fair fight that I had to admit I had very little chance of winning.

And then, like a little ray of sunshine on a cloudy day, help arrived. Jaleel and Tarradon came out of the Wild Surge Inn only twenty feet or so away from where I was about to accept Kiva’s challenge ... and from there it was a reasonably simple matter to draw them into the argument. Jaleel was all too easy - he hates Kiva more than me and was already spoiling for a fight. Tarradon was a little more complicated and needed just a bit more . . . massaging? manipulation? to involve him in the dispute. I hinted that Kiva had threatened Muir and myself and drawn blades without provocation, threatening violence against our persons for no reason. I could see Jaleel’s hands caressing his sword hilts in anticipation. Unfortunately, I couldn’t quite persuade Tarradon into challenging Kiva in the arena - although I think he got close at one point. Kiva’s manner with humans, whom he openly admits to thinking that we are an inferior race rubbed Tarradon up the wrong way immediately. It amuses me that paladins can’t abide arrogance in others but are blind to their own. Anyway, the 'situation’ eventually was diffused without bloodshed. A shame - it would have been almost as satisfying to see Kiva dead by either Jaleel’s hand or Tarradon’s as much as by my own.

I have written up a list of Kiva’s faults and am considering posting it on the Wild Surge’s notice board.

Kiva is prone to belly button fluff.
Kiva is not very bright and not very pretty.
Kiva is a liar and a cheat.
Kiva has poor standards of hygiene and homicidal tendencies.
Kiva looks in the mirror too much.
Kiva thinks he’s really popular, think all the girls want him...he's wrong.
Kiva eats with his hands.
Kiva has bad breath.
Kiva has a stupid name.
Kiva can't sing or dance.
Kiva has eyes that are too close together.
Kiva will pay for women.
Kiva tries to fit in - bur never does.
Kiva fancies himself.
Kiva needs constant mothering and reassurance.
Kiva wears silky women's underwear beneath his clothes.
Kiva is pompous and overbearing.
Kiva used to be a wooden boy.
Kiva can't play ball sports very well.
Kiva wonders why no-one will shake hands with him.
Kiva is often seen in a dirty raincoat.
Kiva tries hard... but succeeds rarely.
Kiva can't handle his beer, smells of mayonnaise
Kiva thinks that he's all that he says he is.
Kiva goes to the toilet twice a night, doesn't always get up for it.
Kiva always has a bit of his last meal displayed on his clothes.
Kiva wears cheap and loud clothes.
Kiva is a good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.
Kiva wants to be in a boy band but he's not pretty enough.
Kiva only goes out with Tegan so that he can steal her clothes.
Kiva thinks he's tough and proves it with young girls and boys.
Kiva picks his nose, a lot.
Kiva laughs like a demented dog.
Kiva sometimes forgets to bathe.
Kiva wants to be 'exotic', but only manages to be 'strange'.
Kiva looks better with the torches doused.
Kiva wears clothes 2 sizes too small.
Kiva wears a lot of make up.
Kiva sleeps with a teddy-bear.
Kiva wears odd socks.
Kiva giggles excessively in a high pitched tone.
Kiva likes gherkins and sympathises with harpies.
Kiva hangs around with old blokes and let's them buy him stuff.
Kiva is prone to sulking.
Kiva wears a wig.
Kiva was a teenage groom.
Kiva wears white stilettos, dances round his handbag at the Wild Surge Inn.

[Pseudonym]

A little while since my last entry - nothing much happening that seems journal worthy . . .

I have participated in adventures and quests here and there, some only moderately successful, some very much so. A trip into the Berhagens netted another small fortune in gold and various items. I've met some new and reasonably interesting people - Karana, Quilus, Jin, various others. All seemed like reasonably decent folk. Haven't seen Muir in a few days, haven't seen Charlotte or Haugrim in a few weeks.

Just a quick note about a snippit of a conversation that made me laugh - i'll try to record it to the best of my recollection;

Karana (on describing the fall of Pranzis) - "Karana fought like a champion that day"
Arkolio - "Did Karana just refer to herself in the third person?"
Jin - "Jin thinks that Karana did"

[Pseudonym]

Today I heard a merchant in Port Hampshire ask for one hundred 'trues’ from a customer. I’ve heard this expression before for gold coins but the thought lingered with me today for some reason. Trues. A funny name for coins but I think it would be impossible to come up with a more appropriate one. What is truth? Truth is a matter of opinion and perspective. Truth for one individual can be quite different for another. What is a true statement? The sky is blue? Is that true? For me that statement might be true now but for someone on the other side of Layonara, at that very same moment, my true staement would be false. For them, the sky is black. There was a girl who used to live on the farm next to ours when I was a boy who was unable to see colours. My statement was not true for her either. Is there a universal truth? Religion? God? I laugh at the notion of a true God or Goddess. The Gods are pettier than the foolish mortals who give them worship.

To me, my truth, the one and only real truth is gold. It is mother, father, lover, provider. It make friends of enemies and enemies of friends. It buys all emotions, love, hate and everything in between. It is power, It is the difference between life and death. It transcends religion, race, sex, all boundaries become irrelevant.

It is the one and only truth.

[Pseudonym]

My life would be immensely simple . . . if not for women. Well, simpler anyway.

Part of me longs for my previous 'existence’ where every woman I met was but a potential conquest. One night, or two nights at the very most if she was something extraordinary, and I would be on my way. No hassles, no emotion, no goodbyes, no problems.

And then came Muireann.

With her by my side, everything can be wonderful. There is laughter, warmth, fellowship, romance . . . love? Well, maybe there is strong 'like’ at the least!

Other times . . . arguments, worrying, bickering, uncertainty and deceit. She challenges me and infuriates me. She is unyielding, stubborn, demanding, hypocritical. I start to wonder sometimes if she is mortal at all or more likely the incarnated avatar of Mist herself come to make my life a misery for some perceived sacrilege or blasphemy.

Then, again, I will think, would I want Muir any other way?

[Pseudonym]

Had a quick 'jaunt' to Hurm to earn some gold in a dispute between rival pirate factions. To be truthful, i'm not even sure who or what the different factions were, what they represented or why they were against each other. I wasn't really interested in the whos and whys. One faction was paying more than the other and thus my allegiances were pretty clear.

Also signing up as part of the pirate crew were some people that I had met previously and some new faces as well. Lin'da - an impressive elven wizard. Is it wizard or wizardess for a woman? Whatever, Hilda the dwarven axe-wielding maniac. Is it maniac or maniacess? Sniverous Coldpepper and various others. All in all, it was a short and prosperous trip. I had hoped to secure some more information regarding Muir's sister as pirates are often linked in with the slave trade but no-one had heard or seen a human lass matching her name or description in those parts.

After finishing up with this task I returned to Hlint for a little rest and relaxation. Seen a little more of Muireann than in recent weeks which as been nice . . . can't help but wonder how long it will be before our next shouting match! Enjoying her good mood while it lasts!

Only other thing of note was a quick trip to Storan's Crypt with Tarradon and Serissa. I haven't had a lot to do with Serissa over the last few months ... she and Muir have no time for each other (putting it mildly) and there would be no quicker way to put an end to the peace than by being caught chatting to Serissa! Anyway, snuck out of Hlint down to the crypts. Was a relatively easy fight. I stayed behind the other two mostly, my sneak attacks are not particularly effective, but several times I had to utilise my knack for disarming traps and unlocking doors. I think all in all I did enough to justify my half share of the loot.

Oh, that's right, the loot should have divided by three! I'll catch them up next time *laughs*

[Pseudonym]

A quick tale to recount, that of an interesting journey organised by a chap by the name of Jin Lun Lee. I had met Jin once or twice before and he was as tolerable a companion as many I have encoutered in my time in and around Hlint. I saw a notice at the Wild Surge that this fellow was looking for travelling companions for a trip he was planning. Payment was to be in the form of equal shares of any booty found.

Normally such a notice would not have excited me to the point of getting out of bed, especially without the promise of a payment of a minimum fixed amount in gold, yet one thing about the notice captured my attention. Whomever was interested in accompanying Jin on his trip was to meet at his house at 136 Leilon. I coincidentally had been to the street where I knew this house to be a few times playing around with the idea of a bit of night time larceny and this was a perfect opportunity to have a closer look at a few of the houses with a legitimate reason for being there. I arrived an hour or so early for the meeting at Jin’s house and had a good look around the area ... very interesting. Elegant houses belonging to fat merchants with coin purses that are fatter still.

At the appointed time I made my way into Jin’s house ... I thought monks were supposed to be simple living, peace loving folk that were focused on the spiritual plane and not the material? This monk liked his creature comforts ... the house was huge and lavishly decorated. I couldn’t help but eye off an expensive looking candelabra but I think some of the others that had already gathered to Jin’s summons were keeping a pretty close eye so I didn’t try to swipe anything!

Some of those gathered I knew and some were new faces I had never before seen. Muireann of course I knew (intimately!), Tarradon Duvall, Alleina the priestess of Aeridin, Shamur the quiet yet effective fighter, Eghaas - who seems to have grown in power and stature since we last adventured together, Hilda the dwarven lady (lady? Ha!) battle machine and of course, our host, Jin. New to me was another priestess by the name of Ranewin and a little fellow named Thorn Someone the Fifth. All in all it seemed a more than capable group and after a brief conversation we headed out. A short trip by sea to Hurm and then we headed off into the wilderness following Jin’s urging and encouragement.

We travelled for many days and nights without, it seemed to my reckoning anyway, a particular destination in mind. We fought an array of foes, humanoid, monstrous, fantastical, whatever and whomever opposed our progress posed only a minimum of problem. The thing that concerned ... well, maybe not concerned, maybe more like interested me the whole time was that Jin seemed to be watching and evaluating each member of the party. Whatever I did, I could feel his inscrutable gaze weighing my every action. After a while it started to grate on my nerves and I decided the most amusing thing to do was to try and be as obnoxious as I could possibly be.

At one point an impossibly large and ferocious bear tore out of some nearby brush and attacked Ranewin who had wandered too near the beast's den. The monstrous beast was killed without too much hassle, a particularly fine shot of mine (if I do say so myself) that eventually dropped it, but Eghaas, ever the wannabe druid, was quite upset that we had slain one of nature’s creations! Who cares? Anyway, we probably could have pacified Eghaas - the bear did attack us first after all - but I decided to have a bit of fun. For the next hour or two I tried to fit the word 'bear’ into every sentence that came out of my mouth!
“Watch your step Eghaas, I couldn’t 'bear’ to see you trip”
“Is it getting chilly? I 'bearly’ noticed”
“Got something to say Eghaas? Come on, I 'bear’ you!”
Muireann changing into her armour - “Muir, you almost 'beared’ all to the rest of the party!”
“My favourite food is definitely straw-bear-ies”
After a particularly fierce battle - “That was a very, beary close call!”

I did feel a little bit sorry for Eghaas, he did seem genuinely upset by the bear getting killed, but to watch Jin furiously scribble notes in his little diary at every provocative thing I said was hilarious and far outweighed Eghaas’ distress! Most amusing!

The further we travelled, we started having a few companions drop off to return to their various duties until there were only five of us remaining - Tarradon, Eghaas, Jin, Shamur and myself. We continued deep into the Anuroch Desert and must have accounted for a legion of giants. Eventually however, we were all laid low after we were overcome by a large band of giants that must have been put togther as a counter strike against our foray into their stronghold. The war band attacked us from ambush whilst we were being treated to a speech by Tarradon 'Like the Sound of my own Voice’ Duvall - I can honestly say death was almost a sweet release.

[Pseudonym]

I have decided to end things with Muireann for good.

No big fanfare, no screaming arguments.

I just decided that I am not interested in trying to find love. In an arena match between love and lust, i’ll be on lust’s side every time. All the other . . . stuff is just unnecessary prelude.

I don’t like being accountable to any other person for my actions or my whereabouts. I don’t often feel the need to explain the whys and hows of my moods to any other person and to be brutally honest, I’m not really interested in what most other people have to say about anything . . . unless it’s about me of course.

[Pseudonym]

20 things I have learnt in my life.


1. Never, under any circumstances, drink more than 10 ales and eat a lot of bran on the same night.

2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often.

3. Going to a church doesn't make you a good person anymore than standing in a stable makes you a horse.

4. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

5. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

6. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

7. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, unless your action involved the spurring of a woman and then the reaction is disproportionately worse.

8. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

9. A balanced diet is an ale in each hand.

10. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

11. There is always one more ogre/giant/spider/(etc) than you counted on.

12. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognise a mistake when you make it again.

13. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

14. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

15. It's not the armour that makes your bum look fat.

16. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

17. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

18. Never lick a steak knife.

19. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

20. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

[Pseudonym]

My Ode to Truth

Serenity
Peace
Harmony
Humility
Relaxation
Enlightenment
Friendship
Love
Understanding


Who needs it?
I am more than content with the remainder,

Women
Success
Gems
Horses
Prestige
Jewels
Food
Drink
Weapons
Houses
Ships
Glory
Clothes
Truth

[Pseudonym]

Muireann's pregnant.

Not by me - thank the senile Gods!

She told me the news the other day, the father is someone named Enzo Reynalt? Reynolt?

How do I feel? Relief mostly. Annoyance, too, I suppose if truth be told. Not that I want her, not at all, it's just that I prefer no-one else have her either. One minute I really don't care, next I find myself thinking of ways to make her pay for the ease in which she moved on from me. Somthing that implies I do care in some way. Muireann a mother? Poor little blighter, I cannot think of a worse mother to have.

Then I think of a newborn baby, I shudder, and thank all the Senile Gods that I will be far, far away when the brat is born!

[Pseudonym]

An interesting and profitable trip.

I received word through some of my . . . shadier contacts, that the pirate captain Liselle Arcanbow of the Trueflight was looking for a crew for a voyage out of Hurm. With little else to do, I decided to check out the potential employment opportunity. I made the trip to the pirate haven, by way of uneventful sea voyage, at the time Liselle’s ship was meant to be docking. Also gathered were more like-minded men and women such as myself who had been attracted by the lure of booty! A few months previous I had signed onto a trip on one of the Red Bear’s vessels and the Pirate Lord had proven to be a generous employer for skilled crews.

At the docks of Hurm were some faces I recognised and a few strangers. Dogboy - a suspicious looking halfling *wonders if that is a tortology*, Jake - the one-eyed (self styled) salty sea dog, Alandric - the arrogant and disdainful mage, Pig - the half-giant warrior, Revone - the quiet swordsman and Akki - the saucy bard.

We set sail with only an ambiguous detailing of our destination and purpose. Eventually it was made clear that we were heading west past Dead Man’s Point into the Forsaken Sea. No wonder our illustrious captain was being so vague as to our destination.

We arrived at a missionary settlement on a small island to find it abandoned and with no sign of any recent human habitation. Following an ancient map that Liselle had on her person, we trekked inland searching for the supposed final resting place of the pirate lord Ghant Vodoun. Not long after we set off I saw the first of the pygmy people.

The little fellow was almost cute, so tiny and childlike.

Ummmmm, I was soon disavowed of this notion after the little fellow and a couple of his tribe dropped myself, dogboy and a couple of the others in a storm of arrows. After eventually overcoming the pygmy warriors we snuck the rest of the way to the pirate lair - avoiding any more encounters with the vicious little pygmies *another tortology*.

The restless shades of the long dead pirate crew of Ghant Vodoun that we battled inside the caverns were almost welcome respite from the pygmy people outside.

We made our way deeper and deeper inside past ever more insidious traps and dangers - myself narrowly avoiding a visit from the soul mother - until we came to the tomb of Ghaunt Vodoun himself. After (yet) another fight, Liselle collected the mysterious treasure for which we had been hired to help her locate and the rest of us survivors of the crew split the other loot that we found in the lair, most notable of which was an awesome adamantium greatsword. Pretty, but entirely useless for yours truly. How come none of these long dead pirate kings ever wanted to be buried with their favourite adamantium shortsword?

[Pseudonym]

What have I been up to?

Lots of little things.
Some medium sized things.
A few big things.

I have sailed a few times aboard diferent ships in service to the Pirate captain, the Red Bear. There is currently a power struggle goping on between the forces allied under the Red Bear against those of the Silver Crescent slavers. Personally, I don’t have a huge problem with the concept of slavery - well not to the point of waging war against those who engage in the traficking of slaves anyway - however, the Red Bear has proven to be a generous employer on numerous outings now.

This time, myself and a group of others, were employed to salvage some mysterious treasure that would assist the Red Bear in his little war from the hulk of a shipwreck somewhere in the Forsaken Sea. Along for the excursion was Muireann, Thorn Thistletoe, Dogboy, Eghaas, AnnaLee, Akki, Alandric, Revone and a couple of others that I didn’t know. The recovery of the sunken treasure progressed fairly smoothly, without serious injury to yours truly, despite a few encounters with schools of sharks that infested the depths.

Again, the Red Bear proved to be generous and the whole venture added a couple of thousand trues to the bank balance.

I . . . how do I put it politely? . . . been spending some quality time with Akki of late. She is an enigma to me, comes across as vague and flighty yet I know from experience is possessed of a keen wit and razor sharp perceptiveness. I haven’t yet worked her out but I have worked out she is a brilliant natural-born entertainer. Both on stage and in the bedroom.

I have spoken to her about renting out a spare room in her house in Krandor . . . people might not be seeing as much of me outdoors for a little while!

[Pseudonym]

By all the Senile Gods! I no sooner get out of one relationship with a crazy woman and jump straight back into bed with another!

I encountered Akki coming out of the Wild Surge the other night. I spotted Eghaas walking in the opposite direction. They both seemed upset. I immediately thought to myself, 'I can be Mr Nice Guy here and score some brownie points (what a strange expression, I wonder how it originated as all the Brownies i’ve ever met are not terribly concerned with doing nice deeds!) and comfort her in her distress’. Not two minutes into my comforting, it’s-all-gonna-be-okay routine and she looks up at my with tear streaked face and asks me if I love her?

My first thought;
Run!
My second thought;
Run fast!
My third thought;
Run to the hills at monk speed!

Three things stayed my feet at that moment.

One. Akki was a friend. Whatever else, this woman was a friend who was upset over something. It would cost me nothing to help her now.
Two. I had just handed over a large amount of true for my room at her house in Krandor and I was yet to receive my key.
Three. Garent already looks at me suspiciously as I walk past now and i’m sure he would have felt the need to detain/question me if he saw me depart town at a speed normally reserved for criminals caught red-handed.

I calmed her down and as the day was getting late I rented a room at the Wild Surge for us both. She repeatedly asked what I wanted of her, what I needed of her. She seemed close to a break down. She basically presented herself to me on a platter if I assured her that I wouldn’t leave her alone that night.

I stayed with her all night. I held her in my arms. I didn’t take advantage of her.

Why?
Was it a bit of short-term pain for long-term gain?
Was it to protect my investment of true?
Was it a carefully weighed decision of the cost of my missing out on a night of pleasure versus gaining a powerful ally and friend?

Or, was it because I am a darned fool?