A Mage's degeneration

This has been a difficult could of weeks. During a mission with some goodly souls, I came into conflict with a wizardress of conciderable power, Maddison I believe her name was. I then realized, that I was completely alien to them. I was arguing my points of view, that good and evil matter not, that they are trivial matters not worthy of intellectual debate, and that the ends do justify the means...I was shocked that the others found this so....offending! I have followed the ways of Air, the ways of balance for so long, that I feel that I am no longer like everyone else. This scares me in the fact that I, might alienate my dearest friends, the Orc Basher Clan in a way that might cost me my life.

Perhaps I feel this way because of who I follow...Aeridin might not be the best choice for me, because I feel so different when I am around others who follow his lead. Maybe someone more in line with what I believe is necessary...like Mist perhaps.....

Sargon Blackdagger
Wizard of Air
Lord Mage of the Orc Basher Clan

Sargon pens these words sitting in his apartment room in Leilon

It's getting worse...I see that I am vastly different than even my own clan mates. How they look at me as I were some alien being when I said that I wished to blast that Drow from the face of the Earth in Hlint. When that Ogre, felled by my magicks begged for his life, and I slaughtered him mercilessly, when I comment on the weak-stomachs of the "heroes" of this realm. I can see now that there is no way I can be with people who find me deplorable. I have given my oath to the Orc bashers, and I shall stay with them, but perhaps I can also find those who think like I do. I know of such a people, but I fear that if I go to them, I will be hunted as they are...we shall see. I must at least try...I can now be sure that I am no hero, no savior as that damned dragon said I could be; I'm no goodly soul, and its time I stopped trying to be one....

Sargon Blackdagger
Wizard of Air
Lord Mage of the Orc Basher Guild