Letters and Tales

[Rowana]

Dearest Johan and Sweet Bethany,

Well over a year has past and so many things have changed, including my perspective. Long gone are my dreams of simply becoming what i once was. The path to becoming whole again has led me to a place were, more then ever i am needed. Many things i have my efforts in i cannot discuss. However, there is the efforts for Roldem as i have mentioned in my far too far away visits. I recently made a pass through Roldem with Lady Jennara and revisited the damages done there, and the works we have before us. I won't lie, i am overwhelmed. I think Lady Jennara is as well, she has been working with Roldem for far longer then i have even been in Hlint. Her strength amazes me. I have been fortunate to work with her. I will come with the story she told me of the battle for Roldem as soon as i am able. The project of Roldem Relief will take many months, i am looking forward to actually being able to be amongst the people who need us. The High Druid of that area said she would be able to contact Druids willing to help us work with restoring the land as we work to restore the people. This eases a great worry of mine. She has also made many commitments of personal help. As the trickle of help comes in we find more and more of the hardships addressed. I just hope the trickle continues until the deed is done.

In other news,  a great mystery plagues me. Stumbling over a few events pertaining to the strange murders around Mistone, and the causer seems to be a lost bit of past from Hlint. As i dig through the records i really feel that there are several entities involved. I think the blame maybe being placed on the wrong entity all together. I also think this is a reoccurring theme for this entity. I think he was wrongfully blamed a thousand years ago as well. I find myself in the graveyard of Hlint often, as well as the record keeping halls of Hlint as well as the Rofirien Temples on a fairly regular basis.

On the cheerful side, i have been able to do my part in reuniting a family of mer folk and by the trickle, the clan of mer folk. This too has a trickle as all things do, but in the end the part i am most glad to see is the child reunited with her father. It was a truly vibrant event, one i won't ever forget in all my days. This was but a step in the process to free a great many from influence of a harmful usage of a plant, being used by the dark drow. And still yet, this only a small portion of a plan i still do not fully understand the lore for. The abuse of the land and plants must be stopped however, and that i must commit to and see through to the end.

During our work there i was exposed to a negative energy attack (this is a magic that comes from the power of the undeath). This is a great worry for the life i carry with in me, and our little ones were blessed to have the able mind and hands of Lady Eldarwen to purge the energy from my children. If i am honest, i never even saw the strike. I only recall wanting to heal one of our member with a blessing and waking at the gentle but slightly frantic touch of Lady Eldarwen. It was during this she discovered i carry twins. That puts to rest the concerns and worry for how abnormal the pregnancy seemed to be for children of elvish heritage. Well now we just worry and hope that the children will be no worse for wear due to the energy exposure.

On more private matters, pertaining to my husband and i. Things are out of balance between us. I'm not sure how to restore it to how things were once. I still love him, but i feel alone most of the time, even when i am with him. His worry for me in my condition seems to overwhelm him and he makes silent demands of my behavior, but refutes them verbally. I know he is torn, but it causes a hot and cold effect. Either he is there and smothering me with his attentions, not listening to anything only his actions screaming that i pay attention to his paying attentions, or he is gone from me completely, and usually following a temper of my own. I cannot think what it is of me that causes this effect, but i must be doing something displeasing. I am so confused about what he says to me and then how he acts, which is generally opposite. You both are married, maybe you can shed some light on the subject? I feel lost in a sea of loneliness, something i have not felt since i realized i loved him. I come to feel, outside of myself... and unsure of my abilities. My heart tells me one thing, but my mind tells me it is an illusion. I cannot seem to dissearn where my path is to right our falling away.

He has hurt a close friend of our through his unwise actions, and she is fragile now. I pray i can help her rebuild herself and become more whole then she was prior to the effect of his action. I worry that in her state she will do something against herself. She is somewhat manic at the moment, happy and then tremendously sad. Given that her companion and she parted ways recently, i suppose that is to be expected.

Many other intra personal events have happened here. Two of my friends, Talen and Treana called off their wedding I hope i can be there for them through this hard time. My very best friend is away, and i have no idea when she will return or where she is gone. I worry day in and day out for her. Master Ozymandias has mentioned a rather permanent sounding vacation. I rarely see him as it is, and i know he has been gone from our presence quite a bit lately anyhow. I miss him terribly, and i will continue to do so. I will forever cherish my early days here, listening to his tale spinnings, tales he has yet to finish. As bards go, i think i trusted his advice most on my path in lore and spinnings, i guess the reasons for that are rather obvious. I traveled with him, along side Mith for a time while he gathered some information. It was rather pleasant. He said some odd things that i will have to ponder on for a time.

My friend Caighd has become my right hand in many projects we have similar interests on. Currently, He sits watch over little snow angels at the Temple of Ilsare in Hlint. His code prevents him from entering the place, so the priestesses care for the children while i am away, until i can move them to a more compatible place. Ael said he knew of a couple of healers that might be able to do something for them, in their unconscious state, maybe to bring them back to awares. He said he would write and see if either would be willing to come to their aid. I am hoping so. Caighd fretts over the children constantly, i think it bothers him not to be able to go in and sit with them. He is such a big man with an even bigger heart. My nieces and nephew would absolutely adore him, i'm sure.

Ah, so many of these names you will not recognize i suppose. I guess i was just trying to give a glimpse into how things are. Things are always dire, yet... normality exists. Hopefully my focus will keep my sadness and worry at bay long enough to complete what mysteries i contend with at the moment. There is so much more, but this will have to suffice for now. I can tell of my part in things at a later time when these are completed. Truly my heartaches not to share with you both, as some bits are tragic and hard to bear alone. Also somethings are miraculous and should be shared.

Well i will let you back to your daily duties. I am sure you are both busy, especially Johan, with his still very new little one.

Katia keep you safely,
~lee

[Rowana]

Dearest Johan and Sweet Bethany,

*several ink blots of blue sit in front of the first paragraph, as though she was not sure how to start*

Thank  you for your most recent letter. To answer the questions upfront, yes, a group of Dragon Called defeated Bloodstone. The deed was nothing short of heroic, as i have heard the tale spun from a few different perspectives. However, Bloodstone's dying gift to the victory was that of our darkened skies. It is the cause of the chilling temperatures and obviously the harm to the harvest. I've heard many speculations about how long this will last. I won't venture to tell you an exact date as I lack the knowledge to support any of the claims. I do have hope for better times, in the future for our children *another dark ink blot* that the skies will clear and life will recover.

The Great Oak still stands in the Sacred Grove, i saw with my own eyes. A second trip i made there, to aid the Dragon Called who answered the summons to be defenders. Though i did not survive the final battles, i gave my all to assist those brave souls. The Oak stands, but in it's wake the dragon who called us to aid, passed. He fell, giving his life for those that came to his side. The ending was bittersweet, as most things seem to be of late.

To answer, yes the rumors are true, Pranzis fell to another of Blood's generals. I've heard him called everything from, 'the undead dwarf' to 'honorable at the least.' Of course those who were present at the fall greatly desire to wrest Pranzis back from this dwarf, but i think they have considered themselves defeated before the second battle. I have been through Pranzis after it's fall, and the destruction is... wide spread and unsettling. I can see how those who were present at the time might consider it a total failure, though, in truth, i believe that battle to have just begun. Pranzis cried out for a leader long before this onslaught... As several have mentioned in my presence, Pranzis has it now. It will take carefully consideration to move from this point forward. So many are scrambling just to feed their families and find their lost loved ones, much less planning the assault and rebuilding of Pranzis.

*a single indigo spot sits on the page here, large and feathered. the quill sat in this spot for some time before the bardress continues.*

This letter was also to inform my family of the failure and collapse of my marriage. I can not offer the details as of yet, as my heart is empty and words simply refuse to surface to my mind past the emotions of loss, betrayal and fear. I can tell you it was not i who broke the bond between us. I guard closely my children from him, after my most recent encounter. It seems as though he does everything in his power to separate me from those who would support me. In many he has succeeded. I hope that they will hear his words long enough to realize them untrue. I am wrought with loss, not just of my love, but of my security, my joy and my sense of hope. I look at the darkened skies and see a reflection of my own soul there. While my heart bleeds empty, my soul looses hope, my mind reels trying to find the answers of why. Fear has only controlled my life like this once before, shortly after our home was attacked and i fled with you two to find safety. I can't seem to find my ground in this. If  it were not for my duties and my charges..... *another dark indigo blot* i am just thankful for the need to keep busy, despite my want to... *another blot* I remain in shock at the outpouring of support i find in unlikely places. Maybe my hope is not completely darkened, for i still wish to see my closest friends return to our bond. I have some vague hope that i will find balance in the part of my life that is personal. I admit, this waxes and wanes with the day.

I have begun to feel... the need to separate myself from physical contact of things unless it be completely intentional. I find myself.. strangely connected, and in most cases, disturbingly so. Had it only happened once, i would attribute it to cause of that sole riddle. It is not a isolated event, as it has affected my contact with others. My husband... *a line is started but obviously she decides better of finishing the sentence.*

The Tavern has kept be quite busy during this time. I have tired to redouble my work efforts there in a way to provide distraction. In addition, i have started making a few trips to Roldem. I continue to bake on their behalf, and the efforts to move more volunteers towards Roldem is going, but slowly. As I tour the lands I find more and more animals and plants ill from the change the world is under going. I help as best as I am able, but the overall secret to this will be their ability to adapt to our darker days. I pray that Katia will show me the way to best aid Her.

*several lines are started here, the usual care she takes with her manuscript is gone from this letter.*

I can't write any further of these  events, though i know you will worry. Maybe a trip home is in order. I feel the time draws near for the children to be born. I will see about making some arrangements. It will depend on the answers to some lore i am digging for at the moment. If some of the lore comes back as dangerous as i think it might, i may have to look elsewhere for a place to keep them safe. At any rate, i will darken the door step soon, even if it is just for a visit.

Katia keep you,
~lee

[Rowana]

*written in blue ink on a parchment kept in a folder, the bardress purged her soul of the burried heartache that was in her past. Writing had always soothed, and sometimes banished inner daemons. In this time when her words are forced out past a disobedient tongue, the writing of this tale helped. Shared with an audience within the hall of Freelancer this would be. The current would become the future and the past brought to light. She'd just the hope that Elezandor approved of this retelling of his tale*

Elezandor's Horses

    Long ago, a man stood guard over Pandemonium. He was a husband and father and even grandfather in addition to Planar Guardian. He was known as Elezandor, described to be slightly gullible, as well as having an over powering love for horses. As things do, tragedy struck this man's home, in the form of betrayal.
 

    A beautiful bardress came to Pandemonium. She came to work with Elezandor.  She was his granddaughter, and so claimed to love her grandfather. She was powerful, skilled with mind magic and bindings. Slowly over time Koralawyn managed to use a third magic no one knew she had to bluff her grandfather, and those around him. The third  mastery was that of illusion. Koralawyn deceived her grandfather's peers into thinking Elezandor had changed.  He seemed to warp and become odd before the eyes of the others, over time. Koralawyn claimed her grandfather performed experiments on the denizens of Pandemonium. Seeming withdrawn, odd, even maddened, Elezandor looked  to all those watching to change with his plane, become unfit as a guardian. Koralawyn stepped into her grandfather's shoes, becoming the Mistress of Pandemonium, as she could not be a true guardian.  
 

    She had duped the others to bind Elezandor to her, and bind him within solitary, so that he could not escape. To the outside looking in, it seemed as if Koralawyn kindly stepped into her grandfather's shoes. The muted Elezandor was allowed to take five things with him into his imprisonment. Because he loved horses so, he took five horses with him.  As time passed they changed from mere horses to creatures of Pandemonium, bonded to Elezandor. They became apart of his torture. They became apart of him. Each bared a trait of his torture. Their love for Elezandor was unbridled, they existed in madness to help him bare his burden. They comforted him, and stayed with him until he finally spied a chance to cry out for help, to find someone to make right the wrongs of his imprisonment.  
 

    Koralawyn bade him spread chaos throughout the Prime. She held his horses as collateral, to control him. Should he disobey, she tortured them, causing them pain. Yet, they stood by him as he searched the Prime for five ladies. Slowly and carefully he bound his horses to each of these ladies.  
 

    The first lady bound to Fear. With out his presence she knew only terror, for those about her, those with in her heart and her surroundings. Most of all, she feared for her daughter, a brave child in Celestial trappings, guarding the plane of Celestia. Lady Ireth Telrunya carried the burden of fear with strength of will to survive and succeed to save her daughter.
 

    The second lady bound to Anger. Her rage found bond in the library of Spellguard as she sought answers. Lady Anger feeds a rage that burns brightly and out of control. Tend ogre clans could not match it. Her heart ached to be free of her bond, but her will forbid her to give up and leave her Rider sisters without her aid. Lady Rhynn Saehbel bore her burden to the end.
 

    The third to bond was to Denial. Lady Denial was locked inside herself, denied her passions, denied herself. When Denial was apart from her, she was always fine....
 

    Then Defiance came for his lady. No matter what stood before her, she held her defense. She would not be unfettered for her faith was in her bonded. Defiance apart from her, Lady Dorena refused to stand down.
 

    Lady Indulgence was bound to yearn for pain and death. She cried out for suffering, her own and those around her. Her wild passions driven to extreme when apart from Indulgence, Lady Addison Scarlace carried her burden with tortured agony. She could not bare herself  to be as she was, but she would not let down the women who supported her, nor Elezandor.  
 

    Finally as the unraveling of the mystery that was Elezandor  continued, a sixth horse appeared. Yet he did not bond, only tethered. Insanity he was called, and never the same horse. He roamed free of Koralawyn's torture, his first tether was Lady Angela Swan. Her insanity reduced her attention to that of a child. Games and playthings abound as she roamed the streets. Insanity roamed with her. As he was only tethered, Insanity saught a new rider, pulling the Mad Mage from Mith. His power entertained, his image shimmered, sanity gone with his focus. The Mad Mage rode Insanity to the end.  
 

    A plan was drawn, a ritual prepared. Led by Ozymandias, mage and bard alike drew together to craft a binding made just for Koralawyn. On a medallion found belonging to her the trap was placed. From there a veritable army stormed Pandemonium. Bonded with purpose, few knowing the true and full the story for which they sought an ending to. Crawling through the halls of an asylum, tortured screams and broken cries haunted the souls come to break Elezandor from his prison. Taken too, the child guardian of Celestia, Aranna, and bound in agony, the soldiers marched for solitary. The medallion  which bound Insanity to Koralawyn would not be set until she too was in solitary. Before the army tread to the confines she appeared before them and killing them, crowing her victory. Yet she was tricked, and into solitary she went. She killed the child guardian for punishment of interference. But in her confidence she doomed herself as the ritual was finalized.  
 

    Bound in silent agony, Koralawyn stands in solitary, indefinitely. Her actions over many years come back to her in the end. But what of Elezandor? What of childlike Aranna? Freed from his imprisonment, Elezandor released the bindings of the ladies, and his Horses. His magical and loyal creatures returned to him in joy to see him unshackled from his wrongful torture. There where they had been, there would always be a hole in each lady's heart for they had shared souls with Elezandor's Horses. All eyes turned to she who had sacrificed her too short life to do what was right.
 

    Lady Aranna lay lifelessly at their feet, broken. Elezandor gently lifted the child into his arms and whisked her away to Celestia. Allowing the soldiers to follow, she was taken to the Tarn and there, resurrected in the gentle waters of the lake. However, did not one but two step free of death. Tikvah'ulla stepped free from Aranna's body, as she rose before them. Aranna once more a child, and freed from her duty. She would be allowed to go home to her mother. Tikvah'ulla murdered some years before reborn in Aranna, released the child from her duties. Tikvah'ulla and her husband Elezandor reunited after an age apart.  
    
    
 

[Rowana]

*The two half elves walk through the doorway, guiding the children of the hall into an altered room. What once had been a practice field of targets and battle dummies now held what seemed like an acre of bedrolls and cots. A soft whistle came from the lips of the male, his eyes scanning the sea of blankets.  He'd never been above the tavern, but he could see that which had been stacked off to the side to make room for the children. With out missing a beat, the children made ready for bed, the older children helping the younger, and the female half elf sliped between the littlest smiling and tucking. Still a bit awestruck, the male watches with a smile, and then sets about tucking in a few of the  younger ones and quietly sushing the ones near by. He glances up and sees the other flitting like a mother bird from child to child, stopping at each that ask handling everything from putting up hair to last minute sips of water pulled from her canteens. After all are set in the female finally steps into the middle of the room and glances around. She sighs a little and the male glance up at the noise. His eyes catch the change in her face as she focuses on something with in herself. Her stutter seemed second nature to the children now, though when they first met her, no such difficutlies of speach were present.*
   "R-right th-then. T-tale t-time, aye?" She glances around and that focus seemed to take shape pulling about her a certian air. The male looks on, a slight smile touching his lips, and interest sparking in his own eye. The children all smile and the ritual of tale time before bed begins. A chorus of interest from the children, and the female smiles serenly at them, and winking at a couple children near by.
   "W-well, s-since I w-was i-ill, r-receintly... I've a t-tale r-rem-membered m-my m-ma u-used t-to sh-share." She glances around and squints at them.
   "B-but it's a sh-short o-one t-ton-night." She smiles a little at the chorus of groans and objections, but contines on. "W-well, d-dearies... S-sick l-littles n-need m-more s-sleep an l-less t-tale." She tips her fingers to her lips with a slight shushing sound and smiles at them once more. The gentleman smiles a  little and settles in squatting down at the edge of the sea, where the hall meets the room.
   "R-right th-then, a-as a-all m-my t-tales g-go.. The female puts her hand to her ear and recieves a chorus of 'once long agos' errupt and is followed by giggles.
   "R-right, o-once l-long ag-go... Th-there w-were t-two c-cats... b-bigg'uns  l-like J-jalex, bl-black an sm-smooth. Th-they w-were s-sibs, g-gents an l-ladies... St-stuck t-tog-gether n-no m-matter wh-what."  She blinks an looks around at the children thinking to herself where these children had come from. She smiles at them.
   "S-some wh-what l-like y-you l-littles I'd v-venture." The male smiles up at her from his vantage point near the entry way.
   "W-well, o-one d-day, th-the o-older... Wh-what w-was o-only o-older b-by a m-minute, a-as th-they w-were tw-twins--" A terrible pain in the heart stops the female and she bites her lip, pausing. A nervous hush simmers over the children as their minds turn over the rumors  each has made up or heard of  their new care taker. They watcher her as she retains her composure and continues.
   "T-twins... B-boy th-the e-eld-der an g-girl th-the y-younger. Th-the o-older s-says t-to s-sis...." She sets her hands on her hips and looks around. Her voice takes on a deeper quality sounding mock male, yet still holding a slinky quality a sly cat might sound of.
   "'B-bet y-ye c-can't h-hop th-that t-tree' H-he t-taunted. W-well, j-just c-cause th-they w-were s-sibs an st-stuck on, d-don't m-mean th-they d-don't t-tease? She smiles slightly at her audience. A pass of giggles and chuckles roll forward at her from all.
   "S-sis, sh-she c-couldn't d-den-ny a ch-challenge. S-so.." Her voice takes on a slightly higher voice with a drag like a immitating that same slinky cat sound. "Oo-oh b-brother d-dear, I c-can, l-leap th-that t-tree." She gives a slight pause."B-bet y-you c-can't.." .She raises an eyebrow.
   "Ah, w-well th-the t-taunt h-had c-come 'r-round. An b-brother c-cat h-had t-to o-own up..."
    "Aye s-sis, I c-can."  She quirks an eyebrow and looks around, hands still set to hips. The male half elf, leans foward a bit, fully drawn in to the tale right along with the children.
   "W-well... unkn-knowing... a t-trap w-was in th-that t-tree.... m-ment t-to n-net b-birds it w-was." She shakes her head slightly. "N-neither s-sib kn-knew. W-well a-as d-dares g-go, s-sis h-had t-te m-make h-her l-leap fi-first." She looks around and gives a couple of the girls a wink. "An w-we a-all kn-know g-girls j-jump b-better, aye?" A smattering of  giggles and yes' issue from around the room.  "Aye, sh-she l-leaped th-that t-tree, c-clean o-over, g-gracefully a-as anything." The half elf woman smiles a little.
" 'Ah, b-brother d-dear... I've m-made m-my t-tree' sh-she drawled at him. He raised his head and sniffed about. 'R-right, s-sis... I s-supp-pose s-so....' With a g-great s-sigh he gathered hims-self f-for h-his l-leap."  The tale spinner shakes her head.
   "B-but s-sister c-cat... sh-she g-gave h-him a s-scare..." Suddenly and loudly to draw a start out of her audience she lunges forward and calls out, "BOO!"
 Many of the children  squeek and gasp, and the tale spinner gives a slightly satisfied smile. Her friend looks over the room smiling at the children's reaction as well.
   "S-salr-right," She adds quickly, "B-brother w-was j-just a-as st-startled." She raises her hands in to the air and made motions as a tree waving in the wind. "Th-the p-poor g-gent, l-leaped, b-but st-startled, s-snared h-hims-self in th-the n-net an c-crashing d-down h-he c-came. She drops her arms quickly ending in a slight clap at her legs. The  gent sitting with the children winces, likely imagining the associated pain with such an event.
   "C-crashing th-through th-the b-branches," The tale spinner coninues and shakes her head and looking sadly on. "**Th-thump**... H-he h-hit th-the f-forest f-floor. S-sister r-ran t-to h-him... wh-why? *She smiles a little as some of the children speak up. "Th-that's r-right... B-bec-cause th-they st-stuck on a-as s-sibs d-do. B-bright b-bunch y-you a-are." She winks at the couple who answered.
   "S-sis h-helped h-him o-out o-of th-that n-net. It was a st-struggle o-of c-course..." She puts her hands out and wiggles her fingers. "N-no h-hands, j-jes p-paws... sh-she h-had t-to b-be c-caref-ful. C-couldn't c-cut a-at th-them." She makes talens of her fingers. "M-might g-get b-brother d-dear." She lowers  her hands to her sides.
   "B-but s-strugle s-she d-did... An o-out b-brother c-cat c-came! Sh-she h-helped h-him l-limp o-off an r-rest h-his kn-knocked h-head." She reaches up and  rubs her head a little with her right hand.  
   "W-what w-would h-have h-happened if th-they h-haddn't st-stuck o-on?" She nods a little with a few answers from the audience.
   "B-brother w-would h-have b-been c-caught. An s-sister c-cat, sh-she'd a-alw-ways kn-know sh-she w-was s-safe t-too, 'cause b-brother c-cat n-never f-forg-got h-how sh-she h-helped h-him."
   She pauses and sets her hands to hips and turns around looking at each of the children.

AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: W-we a-all n-need e-each o-other... f-for o-our wh-whole l-lives.
Tha'Azail Neverborn: *gives her a warm smile when she looks his way*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: *smiles back slightly and contines*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: Th-this h-here...th-this is o-our f-family...W-we, st-stick o-on, n-no m-matter wh-what, aye? *smiles a little at the chorus of yes'*
Tha'Azail Neverborn: *says aye along with them*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: G-good th-then... t-time f-fer t-tuck ins and k-kisses g-good n-night.  *more groaning and moaning, but she sets about her work moving to each child*
Tha'Azail Neverborn: *stands quietly and backs up a bit, so as not to distract her or disturb the children*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: *she whispers tot some and giggles and winks at others and eventually makes her way back to the end of the rows*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: *straightens after the last one* a-alr-right.. i've s-some th-things t-to t-tend d-down st-stairs...  h-have t-the g-guards s-summon m-me i-if y-you need *smiles*
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: g'n-night l-littles.
AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu: *waves a little*
Tha'Azail Neverborn: *waves slightly*

[Rowana]

*written on parchment in blue ink, the careful manuscript details the request*
To Whom It May Concern:  I, AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu, formally request divorce proceedings between myself and my husband Ista'sinta Ohtartel'selu (commonly known as Mith) based on emotional trama.  We have lived seperately for more then a year at this time. I have proof writen in his hand dating the point at which we seperated and some of the events that passed over the last year.  Please advise what additional information is needed.  Respectfully yours, AnnaLee Ohtartel'selu  
-----------------        
Ms. Ohtartel'selu,  It has been seen and investigated that the marital break down is well beyond repair.  For all intents and purposes consider your marriage severed under Rofireins supreme law in these lands.  Regards,  Paulo Steadyhand Guardian of Justice

[Rowana]

*Written on parchment in blue ink with a careful "final version" scrawl, and tucked away in the folder*  
Once, long ago. When the woods of the world were still quite new. A young woodsman found himself in love. His eyes had fallen on the sight of a maiden, at first not really knowing what he saw. Her hair was golden, like the rays of the sun, and her eyes, like the placid pane of the lake's surface. He found her in the wilds amongst a flock of blue birds. Her voice carried a melody that was strange and enrapturing. The lilt of her notes made him think another sang nearby. He cast his gaze about, looking for the second maiden, but found no other that his eyes could see. Her voice carried a quality that birds sometimes can, where they bring two notes together in an odd harmony that were both haunting and drew one to listen.  

He could not bring himself to disturb the scene. His heart at once at peace and torn by the sight. His strange maiden's tune was sad and near brought him to tears. In the anguish of the song he could also hear the traces of hope. However, nearly as quick as she was found, she was gone. In an explosion of noise and blue feathers, the maiden vanished. Though in his mind's eye, he saw her take the shape of a blue bird and cast off as the rest had. He wondered to himself if they had noticed him and fled. He mused this as he stepped carefully onto the scene, a mess of feathers an stirred dust. He collected a few of the feathers, an kept watch. Years passed, and the gent did not see his lady, though he searched the woods for any sign. The only thing that kept his hope were those feathers, for their color an luster never faded. Though he stored them in his pack carefully wrapped, wear comes to even our most precious things. Not these.

He admitted to a slight obsession over his lost love. Even of only to the creatures in his care. His prayers at night were that he would find some hope. And finally his prayers were answered. Five long years had passed. He had begun to loose faith in what his heart told him should be.  As he walked his path, a glint stole his eye. He approached with caution. Only to find a strange blue feather.        

The gent spoke  to  himself, "I used to think love was finding the balance from with out, but I somehow feel my balance from within. I know she is there waiting for me. I am at peace with myself, and my obsession less the lady, more our happiness. I would see you happy, my love. You are beautiful to me because I love you, I do not love you because of your beauty."    

With his last words the air became astir. In what might have seemed a terror of noise, the woodsman was surrounded in a flock of birds. They were blue in color, but more types the one could identify. They enveloped him, blocking the light and the very air he breathed.  He collapsed after his body could no longer take the punishment. When he awoke, his eyes saw the world in blue.  His body felt strange, an as he looked down, all he could see were feathers. He stretched his arms to feel himself, but wings were there in place of arms.  He could not fathom what had become of his body. As he raised his eyes once more, before him stood his lady fair. She smiled at him, an his heart swelled at the sight of her joy.

She held her hand to him. He obediently hopped to her hand and chirped happily. His chorus echoed by the thousands of birds near them. The woodsman became apart of the sorceress's flock. She whispered to him the words that he could use to break the cures, but he refused to utter them. In her eyes he felt happiness an would not be parted from it. It is said to this day, she roams with her woodsman love, eternally bound in happiness.  

*Written in the same blue in, but possibly much later, and in large lettering*  

His Lady's Love

[Rowana]

**drawn in green ink mixed with her yellow and blue to give a personalized touch, and painted with a brush rather then written with a quill**
 

Wedlar. Apreal 14th,  1413

Dearest Mother,
 

    I know it's been an age. Looking back, I've thought of you often, but have not been able to bare the statement of many things, much less commit to the realism of putting them to print. I regret that decision in some ways now. I rectify that problem now, despite the pain of facing truths. Who better to face them with then you, my pillar of strength.

    I really hadn't thought to write much until it came upon me how old Lindel is now. He comes upon his Naming a bit late, due to circumstance. One important person in both our lives was out of reach for a time. In that she helped me choose this name and had saved his life and mine on a number of occasions... I couldn't see holding the ceremony with out her. Lindel is a gem, but he is so quiet, mother. Not like the chattering children we took in at the 'Lancer. Not like my sibs, nor the children of my remaining sibs. I worry for him some. Did this tampering that was spoken of harm him in someway? Claims of these memories I do not  have, that he was once twins, by tampering. Something about Children of Dark and Light. That this tampering was undone and my memories with them. I do recall something terrible. The one image burned into my mind that gives all the rest enough credence for a tenuous belief in the others. Well, at any rate, peaceful Lindel is looking forward to his Naming, and to the gifting of plants. I hope his shy nature doesn't overcome him when the time comes! I can only wonder at the marvel that he is, where he's come from, what he may still yet face. Yet, never with out me. Mith once told me you needed four walls to raise a child. Lindel seems to do well with out them, but for the silence... Then again, maybe all his silence betrays his true efforts, listening.

    Stray thoughts such as these... I've thought of father these past few weeks. I wonder if he's out there somewhere. I wonder if he ever returned as he'd said he would to find the farm destroyed and the land grown fallow and wild. I'm not certain that he'd do such a thing... Considering it's been almost thirty years and even I have not had the strength to return. I wondered though... Would he like to see his grandson? Would he spend time with me now that I am not rooted in place? I roam the lands like he used to, maybe like he still does. I've seen things beautiful and horrid, lost friends, had my heart broken and mended and broken again. My closest friend an elf herself.. I don't know how they cope with so many years in their lives. Maybe that's why so the seeming is of aloofness and uncaring exterior.

    I've tried to immolate this attitude, but I'm unable. I look in the streets of the cities I frequent and cannot help but be saddened. Those in need, those unwilling to aid, those still yet oblivious to the true problems. Worse still the land suffers. Rhizome once said that the land would alter beyond recognition, that perhaps all would become desert before the skies would clear. Once the skies cleared the land would begin anew. He didn't seem to fret, only that this was a natural cycle, and to be handled as best as we were able. I don't know how to take this, hypothesis. When Plenarius last spoke of Eon and Katia he mentioned in passing a plan to clear the skies. I think perhaps I prefer to believe in this over the other. I couldn't bare the thought of my son dying of this dark cloud, nor any other creature from tree to spider. Perhaps it is all theory. How was the Cataclysm survived? In ancient days gone by, I'm sure most was theory. I suppose in any case, I will help in what small way I can. With each seed I plant I offer prayers, and hope. All is quiet however, not worsening, not getting better. Like a crux of something either joyous or catastrophic.

    Silence.... My brother and sister grow older. Their children are growing. I'm a great aunt now. You would be a great grandmother were you still here with us. Ireth speaks from time to time on what she will and has faced, with her friends dying as she ages gracefully. I can almost no longer bare to visit Johan and Bethany. I do what I can, but I think Johan will not survive another winter as these last. I tried to convince him to move south, that I would help them. He refuses to give up working the land. She's just as stubborn. Sometimes I would do well with a fit, a tantrum of unfairness, but it is what it is. I know when they go, they will be in your arms again, in the sight of Katia. In the end that isn't so terrible. I am glad they will have peace at last. There is fear, however, with out my sibs, I am not sure how their children will survive. None are so wizened, none of them are terribly old. Am I to raise the next generation?

    Mind swirls with so much. It is no wonder in these dark times so many despair. How can the heart not feel heavy with all that we face. Famine, disease, loss... In my own case, loneliness. I think even Lindel feels it. His Naming comes though and I hope the activities of the day will lighten his heart. The White Horn woods, like a second home to me, and I think to him. We spend some time there when I'm able to get a way from the tavern or the guides. It's worth the long trek. That and it's relative safety to travel with a little.

    Well, I have another apology to write yet this eve. Some else important whom I think in my lack of knowledge of a situation, I have wronged. I hope he hears my apology. That is all I can ask, though I can always hope...
 

 Be well in Katia's greens mother.
 ~AnnaLee

[Rowana]

*It was late in the night and she was cold from the long ride, even though she'd walked from Plains of the Slain cross country back to the tavern, the chill still would not subside. The long ride was pleasant despite the cold. She felt some rapport with the two, Sir Edward and his acquaintance Ted. The whole ride had been an experience. Lee was no stranger to how the people of Alindor had suffered since the dark skies had fully taken their hold. However, the stories passed down to Ted and Sir Edward about the days when Milara was riping their country to shreds was.... Well maybe that was where the source of her ever lasting chill.  


 This rift opening in the Erylin lands, and with not to do about it, since it was so far out. Honora claimed full responsibility for the action, but with all who were present on this quest for knowledge, Lee knew it wasn't her fault, not solely. Quite a few of those who had caused the thing were no where near this effort to cure the it, and the land twisted and rotted and suffered... Storold had made his intentions clear and at first she was glad of his presence. Most of the others Lee didn't know well. She just kept hearing their conversations over and over, and tried to pick the facts out from the supposition. She tried to make sense of all this talk of portals and gems and the missing king, this Narasa spirit that tickled her insatiable-need-to-know... Thoughts swirled around in her mind. She couldn't fathom why Honora's aids, Daniel, Kyle and Ferrit among them, seemed to think this... Baroness Imjam was such a threat. For all purposes she sounded like a woman defending her lands the best that she was able, trapped within those walls. She would strike out at Milara's men, even in captivity...  Like a caged creature unable to walk it's path freely... Lee couldn't imagine, she shuddered at the mere touch of empathy. All of them... All of the royals from Erylin... trapped in their walls, for more then two hundred and fifty years. Their people... They had no idea... And to watch their proud heraldry used as Milara's watch dogs...  


 She stopped and steadied her mind. She dropped a coin in the strange music box contraption in the tavern main room. Tickles of gentle music wafted from the box and she leaned upon the post next to it, watching the sleeping Honora in a pile of pillows next to the hearth fires. It was nice to have people she knew around her again. Strangely it always seemed to happen when there was a dire need of some sort. She'd not let that happen again with her strange friend. She was like Jennara in some ways, but certainly more eccentric. Half-orc woman with a heart as big as any blue sky, but she wasn't walled in like Jennara was. The tendrils of a memory tugged at her and she drifted back...


 .. to a small bench in Hlint proper so many years ago. Lee sat there staring out among the dust her mind adrift in misery, her body aching with the early pregnancy. Honora had approached unheard by Lee and nearly scared her out of her skin when she spoke so softly.  


 “Miss Anna... It's good tah see you again, been a long time. You don't look so good, you okay?”
 Lee had merely nodded ascent, unable to explain anything as her misery was so great it had muted her. If she was honest, she didn't want to talk about it... It always seemed more real when she spoke of it. Inescapable.  


 “Well you don't look okay, Miss Anna, but I see you don't wanna talk 'bout it jus' now. Well, I'll leave ya to yer thoughts, bu' you know I'm about if you ever wanna talk...” And with that she'd drifted off again, to the four winds. Her care had touched Lee in a time she'd felt abandoned by nearly everyone else. That dark mercenary had returned and was mocking her at every go, nearly all of her so called best of friends left on the wind they'd come from and her husband in bed with one of those.  


 A pained smile drifted across her face at the memory. Well, that touch of kindness was to be repaid in full now. This quest of Honora's... Lee had a stake in it, as the land was ripped asunder and the balance toppled.... But she would do this Honora's way and she would help with all of her ability. She was certainly not going to let that so called Toranite diplomat make another tortured person cry in a room full of strangers, despite her best intentions to aid Honora. Lee would tell Honora when she woke all that she could recall, tell her that they should trust Imjam. That confession and request of aid was the best path. She pulled fourth all the little notes she'd made along the trip with all the little anecdotes from Sir Edward and Ted, from her conversation with Baron Nable and Lady Anna. Her tired eyes grazed over them once again and then she placed them in a new folder in chronological order. She made a few notes on another piece of paper, an outline of sorts and waited for it to dry, nearly dozing in the process. As her head drooped she startled awake and then she tucked the last page at the top, placing it all in her satchel.  


 Slipping her shoes off so as not to wake Honora from sleeping, she padded quietly across the wooden floors of the tavern and up the steps to the guild hall. Passing through all the hallways and rooms till the room with all the couches where she knew she'd find Lissa and Lindel sleeping. Lindel always slept on the couches when Lee was away. She didn't know why but it was touching in away. She set her shoes down next to his couch and took off her cloak and hood, covering him with them. She sat on the end of the couch, resting her head on the back and watched him sleep. She smiled softly and drifted asleep, thoughts of Lindel mingling with the woodsy smell from her clothing and the strange tale she was unraveling, thread by thread.**

[Rowana]

*Lee stormed around in a circle in the common room upstairs. She fumed silently, clenching and unclenching her fists. She made seventeen or so loops and then finally stopped, calling herself in check. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, letting it slip from her lips slowly. She repeated this motion another three times. The idiot... He's going to charge headlong in to the  rift and get them all lost or killed or worse!  
 
 “My duty to Lucinda, this rift will be mended!” She muttered under her breath. He sounded like that creepy Toranite, Praylor! He was practically patting her on the head and sending her off like a child. Mother forbid she be taken seriously for a few moments where the Weave was concerned. Didn't he remember she wanted that rift sealed just as badly as he did? Didn't he remember that it was twisting the land, displacing the wild things, turning the whole place upside down? She rubbed a gloved hand at her hip in irritation.
 
 She'd bumped into Connor after an unsuccessful corn gathering trip. The stalks were withered and small. She'd meant to see if anyone was in, so she might make use of the portal inside. She'd not seen Connor in so long, seemed to her like an age. She'd visited a bit and even been allowed to peek in on his sleeping children. She'd begged his opinion, in a round about fashion, on the whole rift business. She just couldn't get her mind wrapped around the ... inner workings of the whole thing and she felt like an idiot every time she opened her mouth near those that were seeking out the method to shut it. Ever the patient one, Connor explained slowly everything he understood. He'd told her about those 'anchors' and the way the magic would interact. He'd even caused a crashing epiphany within her own mind about the poem and some of the meanings within the whole problem. He'd surely gone straight to bed once she'd stepped through the portal. His headache was so tangible from her explanation she could almost feel it.  She wasn't sure if it was her wild ramblings, her ineptness or the actual circumstances. He'd pinched the place between his eyes and nose as if staunching a nose bleed and instantly she'd felt guilty.... But he'd explained it all so carefully, and made it all so clear what needed to be done....  
 
 Why... Why wouldn't they listen? Shaking Honora out of a dead sleep probably hadn't helped... She sighed at herself and tried to staunch the ebb of guilt welling up. They were going to march off into that rift with no anchor, no guide to the place they needed to be... they were going to get lost, or eaten by some dragon or monster, or float off to some distant point into nothingness! What was wrong with Storold? Didn't he see? She let go another burst of exasperation. She took up a small cup with the home made charcoal sticks and flung it across the room. It hit the wall with an odd pop and the charcoal splintered in a myriad of directions, sounding like pebbles on branches. She'd wanted it to implode, or maybe make the sound of a thunderclap, just do something to relieve the welling temper she could not let slip out in public. She dropped to her knees and laid her head down on the floor, letting her hair spill around her, and began to breath, ignoring the dust from the planks.  
 
 Honora would listen. Her friend would not cast aside her advice as pure nonsense. She'd listen..... She had to... Another deep breath, and another.... She wasn't going to fail her friend. If she had to face Baroness Imjam alone, suffer the wrath of the woman alone, she'd not fail Honora.... But she wouldn't have to do that... She wouldn't... More deep breathing, and slowing, stemming the flow of near rage... Her eyes fell shut to halt the tears and she buried her irritation and hurt deep with all the other bits. She sat back up quickly, maybe too quickly as the spots began to float in her vision. She rose to her feet and brushed herself off to make herself available down stairs again. She had the bread line soon and she needed to be serene, ready to sooth other hurts. As an after thought she brushed the dust off her face and made a mental note to return and clean up her temper off the wall, floor and shelf in the common room.  
 
 She climbed back down the stairs and eyed the group over by the fire place, and approached them. As she looked on at Storold, images of three other men previously in her life flashed briefly where his face should have been and she all but bit a hole in her cheek to keep herself in check. She'd not let him patronize her like that again. She would not be belittled by someone she called friend. She stammered out a series of questions after hearing Clarissa's assertion about the portals and forced her mind to work..... So much yet left to solve...*  

[Rowana]

*Lee plucked a small feather out of her clothing and looked at it in wonder. How the thing had stayed in her clothing through the rift, through the underwater....place... through the spectacular ending to a hunt that seemed never to end... Her mind swam in the awe of it all....  
 
 She'd been there to see the king released, Adwneth, the Keeper, that magnificent dragon... Watched it Simply look on Honora and judge her to pass. She'd never forget that in all her days. Honora had completed Baroness Imjam's request along side Ferrit and Jillispone. The once priest of Mist was carried home to his mother in dust motes so that she could grieve and move on. That Tempest woman had appeared, twisted Honora's goal in the guise of helping... But it had all turned out well... Well... the well of madness traversed, poor Kyle surviving addlement... Jharl of many potions.... She sighed and dropped the feather into a bottle...  
 
 She took out a parchment containing so many notes and began to write the ending to the half completed poem she'd started so many weeks before.
 
 Each noble from the bounty drank,
and now in final hours, sit.
With portal view, their victory take,
From painting Minds adrift.
Come king Erylin, come Nasara to the cup,
Adwneth to tie the strands,
and Milara to give up.
No Luck and true nature of Plans.
Our pilgrim fumbles lost,
and a kingdom with no lead.
Visions filled of magic tossed,
now Adwneth lay to bleed.
 
 As sung, hope gathered anew.
 Came they from strange corners,
 Seeking glory, fame, and dues.
 So long to listen to the mourners,
 Then to unravel the Weave.
 Darkest hours before the dawn,
 Yet they continued to believe...
 Delve they did to find the bond,
 Daughter of Erylin, lead.
 She took the reigns to fight.
 Through honesty all was said
 And raised the past to light.
 
 Brought home she did the wayward son,
 swaddled in the ashen cloth.
 Finally the full story was heard.
 Drawn in to the flame as a moth,
 Verging on truth in madness,
 Delving headlong into the rift.
 As the ring she followed did bless,
 the mirror made as a gift.
 Stepping from the pool she did,
 and took a moment's breath.
 Once more to the well she bid!
 Free Erylin or death!
 
 Orb keys filled with stones,
 A light spelled in history.
 Unlock Narasa bones,
 And Adwenth's mystery.
 The king returned to steer,
 living in simplicity.
 A relic lost once feared,
 Second of a trinity.
 The ancient curse now lifted,
 And thwarted Milara's greed,
 Through ash the Kingdom sifted
 And again the land did breath.
 
 A tale of Honora Tannerson
 
 She smiled a little and made a copy to send along in the morning. After each page of ink dried she tucked one in her journal and set the other aside for delivery. She curled up on the couch next to Lindel and watched the rise and fall of her son's breathing until she drifted off to sleep.*

[Rowana]

Her mother's face appeared before her as it had been when she buried her. Her father's face drifted by but only in the vagueness that she knew it was him, not that she truly saw any details that she recognized anymore. The tortured faces of her siblings as she'd found them in the fields, the aged faces of Johan and Bethany....  She watched the faces of her friends, past and present in various expressions of despair... Something had happened in the dream but she could not recall the events in detail. The strange face of an old man smirking at her. Then came the press... The press of all the bodies against her, the emotions of those around her. The melancholy feel, the gloom color, the weeping. Then a terrible scream of pain that could have only been Denial's cry. She could see him rear to his full height and kicking his front legs. There was a burst of movement and then nothing but falling feathers. Another moment saw her whisked further in her past/future, standing at her mother's weathered grave and feeling a horrible tension and misery from the stone, only to read her own name from the letters an not those that should have spelled out her mother's name..... Finally she recalled the dreadful sadness of being alone. She did not know from where it came, only that she had felt buried by it. All the while her mother's song had echoed, with her mother's voice, in the back ground. A white doe leapt across her vision with a strange call and her body jerked in alarm at it's sudden presence.
 

Wedlar, Febra 18, 1423
In the small hours of the morning.

Lee jerked awake with a start. Quickly brushing her hair from her face, she listened with out moving her head for a few moments. She began to try calm her breathing, lest she wake the children. It had all been a dream. Just a dream.... Another dream. A nightmare.... Just a dream... Faces from her past and present swam before her eyes even now as she laid there in the room.  


 She looked over the room from where she lay on the floor, feeling the press of the children's bodies against her and watching the room... It seemed to shrink in her mind though she knew full well the room itself changed not at all. She closed her eyes to try and will her heart to slow itself to something reasonable. The faces began to swim before her again. Something snapped within her, in an almost tangible way.


 In her heart she wanted to be careful not to wake the children as she rose but she could not bare the room nor the press of bodies. Nearly leaping from the tangle she was then free of she snatched up her brown cloak and a necklace and rushed out the door. She did not recall if they stirred, and as much as she wanted to turn back to check she could not slow her steps or change her direction. She threw the cloak over her shoulders to cover her shift and darted through the empty halls, the quiet chinking sound of the necklace ringing in her ears as though a great bell had rung. By the time she made her way to the stairs and out the door, she was dizzy with panic and her heart felt as if it would fall freely from within her.  


 The salty air from the sea was like a slap as it hit her, but she was thankful for it all the same. She took careful breaths, ragged slow breaths. Finally able to manage some semblance of focus... The rain was pouring down, hiding the few tears that slipped down her cheeks. She pushed herself away from the wall of the building and slowly moved over to the bay, clutching her cloak around her and the necklace closer. Pieces of the dream began to slowly drift back to her.


 She clutched the necklace against her, it's touch warmed from her own body. She closed her eyes and listened to the pattering sound of the rain, the sound of the waves lapping against the pier.... The sound of the soft howling of the wind as it blew across the roof tops. The terrible panic began to subside, and she moved enough to slip the delicate chain around her neck. She slid her hand down the details of the chain and pendent, sliding down into a crouch at the same time. She leaned upon the short jut of wood in front of her and weeped.  She weeped for her mother, her family... The emotions in the dream only brought to the surface her own silent pains. The loss of her siblings and their children, in the trail of  weeks before she witnessed the sun return to the world again. The image of Plen holding the glass as it filled with sand burned into her memory for all it's personal irony.  


 This was not the first dream, and she had a feeling not the last. What was it? Why did suddenly after so many years... they returned to plague her once again? Aching throughout her mind and body, she had no answers for that. These moments... She could feel her mind slipping away. She would do as she had done before. She would move to what she knew the best. She would become scarce again, and hope to find a cure for what ever plagued her this time. Here or with in the woods, she would still be alone in her heart. Moving the children with her would only serve to teach them better of the things she would have them know anyway. The four walls.... She shuddered and continued to sob, her mind only coherent enough for her suppressed feelings....


 Soaked and chilled to the bone, she dragged herself back inside and into the room where the children lay. She quietly slipped out of her soaked shift and into her clothes. She began to pack everything the children and she owned in to their bags. She rolled everything tightly as possible and packed them securely inside. Then she slipped into the storage hall and pulled out some of the dried fish and breads she had baked earlier and packed them carefully as well.  


 Once all was put securely in it's place she took out a case from her satchel where she kept her writing things and penned a short note and left it for Lina and Lissa. She went back to the room and sat down with the children behind the divider. She watched them all sleeping. Innocent of the world's strange events that were both cruel and beautiful. She hoped she could shelter them for as long as possible. She would show them what was beautiful of Layonara, teach them what she could of Katia's ways. She knew the inevitable would come. They would loose that innocent fire of curiosity and passion for the unknown, and slowly it would be replaced by the fear of darkness, the fear of pain.... If she could only stave it off until they were well set within the world... She shook her head at herself and chided herself for such optimistic thoughts.  


 She huddled there she sat against the wall until the warmth returned to her skin, just breathing. The ringing silence only furthering her resolve, she twisted her hair back so no cold wet strands would settle against the children and then quietly woke them. She sang softly as she sang to them every time they woke so they would not be alarmed. The song was her mother's lullaby. Lindel and the Trio fell asleep to it and woke to it as often as Lee could manage.  


“Waiting in the dark,
For the warmth of day,
Just feeling the chill, alone.
Rest with me, my love,
Close your eyes to sleep.


As I draw the stars above,
Know dawn what brings.
The sorrows to renew.
You cannot hear forever,
Though my song will keep.


Hold on for my voice,
To comfort your heart.
The glint guide your gaze,
My eyes watching yours.
There's no cause to weep.


As Orn and Ausir,
We are never far.
Within my embrace,
solace keep you at peace.
Gentle dreams let you sleep.”


 One by one the children woke, Lindel the first to come to. She gathered them each as she finished the song and then forced a smile. She informed them that they would go and play in the wood and camp for a while. The Trio too young to really understand were just happy to hear 'play.' Lindel, rather observant for his age inquired after his mother but she brushed his question aside with her excitement to leave on their trip. She changed their clothes into warm things and bundled up the last of their clothing into the top of her pack.  


 She led them through the hall to the only light source in the night, the portal. Lindel picked up Genna, and Lee took up the toddler boys. She looked around the empty halls, holding back another wave of panic she asked for Lindel's hand. He took hers careful not to dislodge the boy in her left arm and the five of them stepped through the portal and began their long walk to the woods.

[Rowana]

*a new page is added to Lee's collection of stories. Two distinctly different handwritings cover the page, though both in charcoal rather then her usual inks. The first teal tinted handwriting is hers, small but flowing . The second hand, black in color,  is larger in script and less rounded then her own.*
 

 

 "Once long ago, when the world was new there lived a creature of special worth. He was a creature of many colors, and shapes, but favored the wolf."

   
 "The wolf roamed the lands for years uncounted looking for others like himself."
 

  "The wolf was content with his lot, as he knew he was special for a reason. He could feel it within his very soul. But that did not stop him from feeling lonely. He thought perhaps if he found another like him he would enjoy his life more."
 

 "The wolf remembered the others he had met in his travels, ones that were not like him, and befriended them, often trading his own preferred form for theirs to befriend them and learn more about them."
 

  "He enjoyed the flight of birds, the smooth feel of the water against his salmon scales, and even the vastness of the world he looked upon as a worm. Each of these things brought him a joy, but when he ended his day he still felt a longing for something closer to kinship. So again he would set off into the world in his search."
 

 "Again, he sought another like himself...across plains and rivers, through forests and canyons, over mountains and prairies, until one day, he spotted another, though this other was not as he, but it was alone and seemed to be seeking as well."
 

  "The other floated in the air, dancing on brief winds but with lackluster that suggested a familiar sadness. He watched with interest at first, hoping to see something in the aerial display that would call out to him. With each flutter of it's tiny wings he became a tiny bit more entranced, forgetting about his troubles of the moment"
 

 "Night fell, and he lost sight of this other.  At first light, he took flight in a similar form, up into the sky to join the dance of the other, but the other was not to be seen."
 

 "He worked from his memory to imitate the same motions of the other he had seen. As he twisted in the gentle breezes he found a faint delight in the dance. It was not the same as he had enjoyed watching the other, but something different. Since it pleased him so he continued, practicing and learning as he went. As he hopped from breeze to breeze he did not watch the direction of his travel, only reveled in the quickly growing joy of his movements.
 

 "As the day faded, he caught a glance of another lone form, this time on the ground, and wondered if it was the same he had seen the day before. From his high vantage point, he watched until the day's light gave way to night and the other form was lost among the shadows."
 

 "Though for a time his heart had been weightless and free, the sight of the elusive other drew him back to his want for another like him. From the air he fell and landed pawed and furry once again. As the shadows danced before his vision he went again in his search for the creature, a creature that he hoped was like him..."
 

 "With his nose to the earth, he used his keen senses of smell and hearing to track this other.  He felt a rush of the hunt, not one of anger or violence, but of instinct and curiosity, and he reveled in the thrill of the pursuit."
 

  "He raced along at the pace of his heart. His paws digging into the soft earth below him, thrusting him forward. Again his heart became weightless. He would catch the target of chase, and he would find if it was indeed the other he sought. His thoughts did not linger long on the future, too consumed with the delight of the present. Through the shadows he ran, feeling ever closer to his prey."
   

 "The trail led him to a small river, shallow and quick, with cool waters from snowmelts in the mountains miles away.  He crossed and tried to pick up the trail again, but it was not to be found, and the river would betray no scents. For the night, the hunt had ended."
 

 "For the night and the better portion of the day the wolf rested. While the thrill of the hunt invigorated him, he knew also there was a time for rest. And so he did, there at the rivers edge. When he woke he drew sustenance from the land and contemplated the new direction of his travel. He closed his eyes and listened. But it was not the sounds around him that caught his ear, it was the sound of his heart. He felt a pull, heard a familiar voice, that he did not understand. Curiously, he followed..."
 

 "The voice carried on the breeze, it echoed in the grass and whispered through the trees. It spoke in the tones of water over stones, of wind through leaves, in the babbling of thousands of insects and the fluttering of wings, yet it was still a voice, plain and clear. He stopped trying to hear the words and instead listened to what they were saying...things he had heard for years untold without truly listening, things his heart already knew without them making it to his head."
 

  "So with eyes closed the wolf ran, relying on his heart to lead the way as he listened with every fiber of his being for the direction he should go. He felt as if all was right, that he could trust this feeling, that he could chase this way with just as much thrill as any other. Though he still felt incomplete at his very core, he knew that this was right. Though blinded, he ran through the woods, over water, past other beings, he just ran. The thrill that enveloped him made his discovery the greatest so far. Just as it seemed things could be no better then that moment. The voice stilled.
 

 "He stopped in his tracks and paused where he stood, his eyes still closed to his surroundings, listening for the voice that had filled him just a moment before.  The sounds were still there, but they did not speak. Minutes passed, but no voice returned. With sadness, he slowly opened his eyes and looked upon his own face staring back at him."
 

 "At first he could not believe what he saw. As watched however, he found that it was not himself he saw. The fur was not exactly the same shades, the eyes followed their own master. He looked upon his prey. It looked upon him with equal bewilderment and curiosity. Not it. She. She looked back at him. For a long moment there was only the still quiet of observation, and acceptance."
 

 "They circled each other, as such forms often do, their gazes locked, their ears and eyes alert, their muscles coiled for action should action be needed. Days of chase, wonder and discovery came rushing back to him. His heart swelled in all he had experienced in the last few days as he looked into the eyes of the other and they looked back at him. Was it her he was chasing all this time, or had she been leading him?  At last, after long moments that passed in the blink of an eye, came a voice both familiar and yet unheard...her voice: 'What is it you seek?'"
 

 "What was it he'd sought all this time? Was it the chase? Was it the presence? What had drawn him all of this time, he wondered at himself. With her there, the prey finally found... He wasn't certain he could recall what had began it all. Then a feeling came echoing faintly back to his mind. Loneliness.... He'd wanted... someone...  Carefully considering how to answer he continued his pacing and briefly wondered what thoughts lay behind her eyes. Finally he spoke: "I seek a companion with which to share.'"
 

 "Her voice floated back: 'And what did you find?' He did not expect this response to his answer, yet he knew the answer did not lie in front of him. His mind raced as her question rang in his ears. For a moment, he did not know how to respond and wondered how such simple question could be so hard to answer.  His eyes blinked, and in that blink came the replay of years upon years, of seeking and searching, of hoping beyond hope for that which would make him complete. And in that blink, he saw his answer standing plainly at the center of it all, where it had always been. His face squared to hers, they stopped their circling and he spoke the only answer he could give: 'Myself.' The expression of the other seemed pleased by this and she said: 'Then at last you are ready to share.'"
 

 

 *at the bottom of this page another word is written, in ink*
 

 

The Search

[Rowana]

the pair sat near the camp fire as dusk's fading light colored the sky in a variety of dark colors. The comforting smells of warm porridge drifted away from the camp, though they were far enough off the trade road that the fire it self was probably less then a spark for any who might have passed by.
 

  The day had been long and the forced pace they made towards the desert weighed nearly has heavy as the news they bore. Each had poured over the puzzle that laid before them struggling with the missing pieces, and were just as soul weary as they were body weary from the pace.
 

  The silence between them was natural seeming, but broken none the less when the slight woman spoke.
 

 “S-so how ab-bout a t-tale?”
 

 “Oh sure...just let me finish this up...” her companion answered. She laughed softly at the misunderstanding.
 

 “N-no... F-from m-me, n-not f-for...”
 

  “Oh!” he snickered, “Even better.” Then looked at her, pointing with his spoon at her bowl, “That'll do you more good in your stomach than in the bowl, you know.”
 

  She shrugged up one shoulder in response, “Th-there's ab-bit more if you w-want,” gesturing slightly at the fire.
 

 “Perhaps...I'll let this settle first.”
 

  She nodded a little and set her food aside for a moment, pulling the pot off the fire and stirring it a bit to make sure nothing over cooked. Once satisfied she sat back and collected her bowl again. She looked into her bowl and began to stir the contents slowly. Her eyelids fluttered slightly as focused inwardly on the words she had carefully picked over during the day.
 

  "Once... l-long ago," she looked up at him and smiled, "When th-the world was n-new an g-green... There w-were few f-forms. M-most were of animal n-nature, yet th-the variety we know now was not how it w-was back then."
 

  The man finished his bowl and turned a bit to face her, holding his bowl in his hand, though seemingly forgotten as he gave the Teller his full attention.
 

 “Th-there was a form, of two legs rather th-then four, who wielded g-great power. It was w-with his b-bidding that th-the sky c-cried, shone or d-darkened.”
 

  She paused a moment, taking a deep, calming breath.
 

  “B-but with such power, c-came responsibilities, th-throngs of th-those who needed his aid, and yet m-more unt-told r-requirements upon him. N-new mothers b-brought their ch-children t-to be n-named, b-blessed... th-their futures read... L-local authorities c-consulted him f-for his w-wisdom... Th-through all th-these things he had f-few f-friends t-to support him.
 

 Wh-when it all b-became t-too much, this form, th-then called D-dranel, spirited away to his favorite place. Wrapped with in th-the foliage of his w-wood n-near, he w-would r-recline in the r-relative peace an speak t-to the trees, sk-sky an moon. All in all, while he c-cared a g-great d-deal for his d-duties, s-sometimes th-they b-became t-tiresome an hard t-to bear. ”
 

  She tilted her head and looked over at her companion for a moment. Watching the firelight dance over his features, she was inwardly tickled by his curious expression, but only briefly.
 

 “On one s-such v-visit to his w-wood, he b-began t-to converse with th-the m-moon, Ausir... T-to her he c-confessed his wish t-to share his b-burden w-with another who would t-truly understand. Ausir, hurt at his w-words lashed out at him.... "D-do I not understand y-your w-woes? I h-hold the world in rhythm! I b-bring light in the d-darkest of hours, an if I am g-gone f-for too long, th-they curse me! Dranel, apologized an f-fell silent.
 

  “S-soon Orn rose int-to his sight and D-dranel t-tried again, f-for sympathy in his t-troubles. T-to Orn he c-confessed his want of an earthly c-creature, someone who was h-his alone t-to share his b-burden. Orn, a fair sight gentler then Ausir listened and understood, for he t-to held a great responsibility. Yet he shared the sky with Ausir,” she paused and lowered her voice slightly, “H-however t-temperamental sh-she was...”
 

  Her companion grinned, his eyes glancing briefly towards the sky. She smiled and resumed her previous tone, “An he had th-the S-sun....
 

 D-dranel had no t-true support. Orn lent what h-he could in s-sympathy, but sent the f-form with little more as he r-returned t-to his d-duties. Orn v-visited with Ausir an th-the S-sun in his absence for a t-time. It t-took g-great time f-for the t-three t-to arrive on a c-consensus f-for anything you see...
 

  “They r-rarely f-found themselves of th-the same m-mind, the S-sun often c-caught b-between the arguments of Orn an Ausir.. Eventually though, they d-decided a g-gift should be offered t-to their f-friend t-to cheer him.”
 

  Focusing on the image she wanted to produce, she drew upon her inner strength and held out her hand between them. A shimmer of blue appeared with white 'dust' lighting the distance between them, faintly. Looking on with interest, the Teller's companion bore a blue glow about his face. She observed the details for a moment watching the white flecks trickle down his face as well.
 

 “R-return Dranel d-did, t-to his usual place. An w-waiting f-for him was an object. But Ausir asked him t-to wait t-to touch it t-till all th-three of th-the orbs were in the sky... F-for it would n-not b-be fair for one of the th-three t-to miss the G-gifting. D-dranel agreed, but he w-was a b-blaze with curiosity...
 

  He p-paced, ate, s-slept even th-thought t-to use his p-power t-to move time, but he r-resisted, as this would n-not b-be p-proper. Finally all th-three rose in the sky an smiled at Dranel... "Reach in, D-dranel, our friend, an s-see what we have m-made for you." With out hesitation he did, d-dipping his arm int-to the blue magic b-before him. The m-magic however stung him!
 

  She arched a brow, and the image rippled dizzily for a moment, tossing faint lights all around their temporary camp.
 

  Dranel j-jerked his arm out of th-the magic an l-looked upon his arm. Upon his arm l-lay a g-great g-golden m-marking on his s-skin.
 

  The image shifted from blue to gold, and took the form of a stylized animal, likely large cat. With her traveling companion fully drawn into the story, his curiosity clearly etched over his features, she did not hesitate to continue.
 

 "What is th-this?" D-dranel w-was alarmed. B-but his f-friends only sm-smiled, and b-began t-to carefully explain. Th-the Sun t-told him, "Dranel, for m-my part I g-give you th-the c-color, g-golden, just as her h-heart w-will always b-be. An her w-warmth, for in t-temperature an t-tender she w-will always b-be for you."
 

 A-ausir shared her p-portion, "Dranel, f-for my part, I g-give you her f-form an m-magic... Th-there w-will never b-be another like her f-for as l-long as you b-breath... Sh-she will r-rival you in p-power, yet always she w-will s-support you."
 

 Finally.... Orn smiled upon his friend, "Dranel, for m-my part, I g-give her p-purpose an n-name.... Her p-purpose t-to bear what you b-bear, in s-sympathy an care... H-her name is Aross, an sh-she is b-bonded t-to you as your s-skin t-to you b-bones..."
 

 Th-the three f-focused upon their f-friend and s-summoned a g-great light. F-from Dranel's r-right arm st-stepped Aross f-for the f-first time, as m-much a p-part of him as his own s-soul.”
 

  The Teller narrowed her eyes briefly and the image of the stylized cat appeared to leap down and prance about.
 

  “An D-dranel n-never f-felt alone an b-buried by his d-duties again... F-for when his h-heart s-sorrowed, so did Aross's. Wh-when his h-heart was l-light, she w-was there t-to share it. An th-this is why...” she paused and she smiled slightly. A light smile echoed back to her.
 

 “S-sorcerers c-call a t-true f-friend t-to them in m-magnificent f-forms.”
 

  With the last of her words she let her hand fall, but dismisses the image slowly. As it faded from view so did her inner calm. As she looked over to see the reaction of her tale, what ever bubbling worry faded with his expression. Surprise and continued interest danced across his handsome features with the firelight.
 

  “Oh that's very interesting....” he said finally.
 

  She collected her forgotten dinner and moved it over to the fire for warming, wrinkling her nose at him.
 

  “I like that....where did you hear it?” he asked curiously.
 

  “Th-that would b-be t-telling,” She looked a little impish, suddenly.
 

  “Oh right...bardly secrets and all,” he nodded sagely. She laughed softly at his teasing and debated whether or not to share the source.

[Rowana]

Anna stared into the fire letting her lullaby trail away and focused on nothing at all. She simply let the environment speak to her. She heard the crackling of the fire, the soft breathing of her two companions, the few night animals that called out.... She closed her eyes to focus harder on listening. She tilted her head from side to side very slowly and focused. No footsteps.... No soft animal padding, no voices.... She let the tension drain from her, but kept her eyes closed, content to remain that way for a time.
 
Where things were concerned, she knew her gift with the Weave was marginal, nor had she inherited the sharp eyes of her father's people, but hearing.... Hearing she often did well. Perhaps it was her nature, to hear things. She listened to tales, confidences, rumors, the land.... hearts. Laying persistently in the back of her mind was Legodia's tale. As they neared the desert and the return to Acacea with the details of their gathering in Swampsedge, the details slipped more and more prevalently to the surface of her mind. How it all came together she couldn't fathom. What did this 'vampire tree' have to do with the attack of Acacea's sacred Tribal tree? She tried hard not to think of how long she'd let Lindel run in the supposed safe places of the wood, largely unguarded. If there was a way to rid the Whitehorn of this creature, she hoped they would find it. Anna felt that there was still some measure of connection between the two situations. She just needed to find it. With sweet Nelly's obvious contamination, the danger to the Tribes, the danger in the Whitehorn...
 
Anna pushed from her mind yet again how much she missed Lindel, her annoyingly persistent heart over the matter of her traveling companion, and her rising melancholy. This was the longest and farthest from Lindel she'd ever been. He was twelve and full well capable to tend himself despite having 'Reth and the doting uncles to tend him. She'd been gone weeks and it didn't look like the riddle was solving anytime in the near future.
 
She took a cleansing breath and poured over the facts. She made a mental list of the things they knew so far, but it was precious little. The most important, who... Who would do this to the tribes? She desperately wanted to disprove the possibility it was one of Sharina's line. They had been through more than enough, more than was balanced surely. But who else? Perhaps when they had dealt with the dark elves so many.... years? Was it really years ago? She shook her head slightly at herself... It was years... When Lindel was but a glimmer in her eye. Back then, they had dealt a blow to the dark elf faction that was trying to afflict the surface with a terrible drug. She remembered the child they'd rescued, who'd been used as bait... The one Plen had called back from death.... A pang of guilt coursed through her with the memory for more then one reason. Certainly those could have a hand in this current situation, but there had been the flood, and little chance any would have survived...
 
Anna rested her head against the cup in her hands and opened her eyes. Swimming... Her mind was positively swimming.... She wasn't certain what was more difficult to cope with... Her heart or the absence of information. She tipped her head slightly to the side, letting her eyes fall on the small brown bundle of scales that was half covered under the blanket she shared with him. An involuntary smile touching her face at the cute creature, his personality was something between a house cat and a dog, precocious yet eager to please and be rewarded. His breathing was calm and regular, his form snuggled tightly around in a ball.  After a few moments lingering over the bundle warming himself both under her blanket and with the fire, her eyes continued on to the small one's keeper and his sleeping form. As much as she was certain they could fend for themselves, Anna couldn't help but feel needed with these two. It was so soothing to feel as though she had a purpose, however small. She'd been floating aimlessly with Lindel between the too crowded tavern and the Whitehorn temple for.... for years. She could see suddenly how it would be so easy to care for the attractive sorcerer. Besides his caring demeanor, his treatment of her as an equal, his openness... She had purpose again. She wondered briefly if her heart was fooling her again, if all of this care she thought she felt for him was really the need to mother hen, or...  
 
The firelight danced across his features as he rested and she searched inwardly. She knew the answer, despite fervent attempts at convincing herself otherwise. All of those other things surely played a part, but it was not some inner-wound she sought to sooth, nor was it some need to fix some wrong done him.... It was just, him. She took her eyes away, turning her face back towards the fire. She let melancholy slip over her like a familiar tunic. It was not to be, and she would just accept that. She wondered briefly if some how she'd done something terrible to Ilsare, then cast aside the thought as old and used.
 

  Once more she closed her eyes, this time to wall out everything. She left her ears open, trying to listen past what was near. She focused again over the facts of the Tribe's dilemma and worked through all that she knew, what seemed to fit and what did not. When the sounds of the morning birds touched her ears, her eyes flew open. Overslept... Mother bless me, I've let him oversleep... She bit down on the inside of her lip and eased out of the blanket. Quickly she began to make another batch of porridge, wheat this time. While the water warmed in the pot she slinked over next to to her traveling companion and knelt down behind him. She took a deep breath and didn't bother trying to fight her feelings of care for him, her melancholy making it to much effort. She reached over and brushed his hair away from his face then laid her forehead on his shoulder.
 
“It's n-nearly d-dawn...” she said softly and inwardly winced at her mistake once again. She waited for a moment to see if her voice broke through his slumber before trying again. There would be another hard push of Weave enhanced travel to meet with the halfings. Likely the night would find them just as weary and frazzled as now, but at least they'd be that much closer...

[Rowana]

The dark locks of the halfling's hair dangled over the other woman's shoulder as they embraced quickly.
 

 “I'll be back in a bit...!” The halfling promised, before darting off towards the door. Lee had misgivings about anyone going out that door but really only because of their recent discovery of the forest's inhabitants.
 

 “Alright,” she said anyway. She knew her friend was more then capable, but it didn't stop the worry. The ever present bells on the halfling chimed suddenly as she turned.
 

 “And thank you...!” she exclaimed from the doorway before vanishing. Of course! Lee thought at her as her form disappeared behind the closing door. Lee flopped back the short distance against the flooring of the tree house and considered the rest of the people in the room asleep near by. It had been a long series of weeks for all of them. Depending on their chosen tasks, some had more opportunity to sleep them others, but she somehow doubted that any were resting comfortably with all that was at risk and all that was still unknown.
 

 The topic of discussion that night, the vampire tree, as they had dubbed it. She was certain it... he had a name but he hadn't offered and she had been too afraid to ask. Her mind drifted over the most recent events, from the day before. They had come to the Whitehorn seeking the tree.... With out the permission of the forest's keepers. She was still queasy about that, but she wasn't certain there had been a better course of action.
 

 They had no hint as to the location and the Whitehorn was a big place. They began their search near the legendary home of Sapproprias. For whatever reason it seemed to fit, finding one sinister place not terribly far from another. Connor had found the hidden grove by accident, though with the way they'd spread out no one had realized at first. A splash of ice water coursed through her veins at the memory.... Connor facing a creature that had so upset Legodia... Lalaith had tracked him once she located his prints to an odd vanishing point. Some how Lee and Acacea had worked together to push away the veil of deception that hid the grove and after Connor they went.
 

 The grove was the stuff of nightmares. The moment Lee stepped in she could hear the pain as she imagined a druid might feel it. A voice that was comprised of many voices echoed through the area, speaking in pained tones. It almost seemed as if the land itself spoke with the creature. Had there not been a cause, Lee would have turned and fled the place, not for fear but out of the resounding pain in those voices, it was so thick and tangible it was as if she could feel it herself. She closed her eyes and let the tears roll silently into her hair as she laid against the floor. The memories of drawing the creatures attention away from Connor until Acacea could tend to his mind protections.... The nearness to the pained creature... Lee still did not understand where the metal to accomplish that had come from, nor how she'd had the strength to continue to try to draw facts from the tree-creature once Connor and Acacea had protections in place.
 

 The words, voice.... baser feel of the sounds echoed around in her mind, as did the uneasy feeling of being lied to... She knew in her heart that... creature.... had been untruthful but her head hurt too much to sort through what may have been inconsistent with the others. For the moment the only part that seemed to echo through her was that they'd have to go back, they'd have to face him again, and that... possibly they'd have to release him to get what they needed to save Nelly. For a while she stopped that path of thoughts. Getting swept away in the emotions of it all wouldn't help anyone, and the whole of it  had to be faced immediately.
 

 The curious part of her wondered at what the creature would do if they released him. Would he simply attack the nearest thing to feed from. Certainly he must be starving after all that time kept from the needed blood. He didn't seem so... Unrefined... His words and the way he used them seemed to indicate a well controlled individual. Somehow that was more frightening then the wild and unchecked version. Neither were any less disgusting. She couldn't imagine what would possess a soul to want to taint himself as he had, to force that taint on others as had been described. Despite whatever claims the creature had about the druids lying, she had no reason to doubt Legodia. With or without the gifted circlet from Acacea, she'd never be swayed into thinking Legodia had lied to them and certainly not while she knew the creature himself was lying about... something...
 

 Lee sat up slowly and drew her eyes around the room, looking first to Acacea's empty bed space, then to meditating Lalaith and Jennara's empty space, and finally to the sleeping Connor. Her eyes lingered over the last for several moments until she caught her mind drifting. She shook her head a bit and then climbed to her feet, determined to find something useful to do. Perhaps Jennara wanted some company while she was doing.... whatever it was she was doing...

[Rowana]

Sunra, Jular 8, 1425

*A page is added to the scroll casing holding so many sketches. Rolled along with the rest as another memory, though perhaps more of a purging in some respects. This tale does not join the rest within her notebook, but holds a place among unshared things, tales that do not move beyond her lips but only dance within her mind.*

Twisted vines of arcane rot bear darkened lives on foot.
 Within cavernous dread lay the root of evils though handed by unSeen effort.
 Barter town, or soulless city, the chill seeps into your own.
 Weep not for these deaths, the Cycle continues unnoticed.
 When soulless bodies collapse at our feet, push away, move on.
 There is dreaded frenzy craved, heartless thrill to sooth the empty.
 What sells most are pieces, and soul is worth little.
 
 Ended now, bathed in balance at least for a time.
 Order restored? Time will tell of course, but who's?
 Bodies burnt of souls, twisted in Al'noth to bury.
 The wood? A step closer for now, though taint still rots within it.
 The taker and twister... One bonded release.
 In harmony and tears enough is saved.
 
 What of tent poles? Bathed in light once again, though scars always remain.
 Laying quietly beneath the stars, a peace settles in the desert.
 With in our hearts all, a favorable outcome.
 But Hers? We cannot say, laughing eyes bury the hurt deep within.
 Planting the seeds of healing like the transfer of potted plant.
 Wildflowers blossom, Her within Her element.
 
 Looking back it will never be the same.
 So much we said good bye to, stripped from us unwilling.
 As Her heart mends my own breaks, again unwilling.
 There is a balance, with in the northern wood, and within our price.
 For now, the People will need to mend, with our best wishes.
 Though taken unchosen, we'd all give it again.  
 
 Desert life and hidden beauty forever protect the deeper secrets.
 Within is something few understand and less will try.
 An untold tale? That is for Her to decide, and in truth only She can tell.
 Mistress of a thousand names, though in truth just one: Freedom.
 On purpose and not she grants It, with care yet aloof.
 
 Sing on desert Heart, surround them with light.
 One wish for Wind be spoken to sound the Chimes at night.
 Shrouded in Mysteries, as a cloth of many colors.
 Vibrant Change to some breaths Chaos, but the beauty within Her shows.
 For always the life will shine, indeed outshine, as one like No Other.
 

 

Anirilanca takes the Black Griffons

[Rowana]

Oclar 2, 1427

The two of them walked along in silence, as was typical for them. For Anna, it was a serene walk. It had been a while since she'd managed to bump in to Connor. After their long trek to Swampsedge and back she had grown very accustomed to his presence. Well, truly it was more then becoming accustomed. The truth was bittersweet and not something she wished to face. So she contented herself with walking beside him in silence as they headed.... Where ever he was leading them.

 The wild wood slowly became ridged farmlands and she began to guess where they were going. Port Hempstead seemed most likely. Her guess was proven when they approached the gate walls. The great walls of pale bricks loomed in her sight. It didn't seem to matter how many times she saw them... Every time a chill ran through her. With in those walls were hordes of bustling busy people, stacked together like ricks of wood. When she passed through the gate she'd be another one of them...  Another body in the press, only with in her would be the fear of the press, of the brief touch from a stranger....  

 She sidestepped and slipped behind Connor timidly. He never seemed to mind her slipping behind him for protection in the past, she hoped that still held true. Either not noticing or accustomed to the action he continued on with out a pause. The two of them passed through the gate after a brief conversation with the guard and looked in on the city proper.  

 Immediately there was the great park that greeted all travelers from the road. It was a stone park, mostly, with a host of fountains and a great statue mounted upon a very large pillar. Anna could hear the chirping of birds but could not see them for the press of people milling about. In truth she didn't look very hard, she mostly kept her eyes on Connor, both as a focus to keep her nerves and to keep track of him so that they would not be separated.        
 
 “Hmm...let's see....bottles..” she heard him muse to himself. He turned to his left not too long after entering the gates and made his way through the crowd to the large temple of Deliar. With in she knew would be merchants and hawkers of unknown numbers. Connor stepped through the doors and moved through what felt like a sea of halflings easily, apparently looking for one in particular. She followed a quick step behind, anxious not to be separated but also not to accidentally touch any one. When they finally arrived at one of the permanent stalls, Anna peered over Connor's shoulder a bit while he looked over the flasks and vials he'd need for his work.
 
 “I c-could,” she paused, and before she could continue Connor answered the unfinished offer.
 
 “You can get the next batch...they're not terribly expensive either way though,” he smiled a little. He pointed out his selection and visited with the halfling for a few moments. He collected his bundle of items from her with thanks and turned to  leave.
 
 “B-but th-the least I c-could,” she paused to wave to the halfling woman as they left, “d-do considering.” The sound of the other merchants hawking their wares were a bit overwhelming, so she focused on Connor.
 
 “Actually, company while mucking through bogs or dodging tree guardians is payment enough,” he told her. She wrinkled her nose slightly at him, the image of the swamp guck on her clothing still fresh on her mind.  
 
 “You have no idea how much time I spent doing this alone...” he added as he walked. She paused in her tracks and looked at him for a few moments. She wasn't really looking at him so much as through him, while hearing his words. She bit her lip to keep from answering that plainly. Loneliness, she thought quietly, I can hear it in his voice. She thought back on all the time they had spent together and how many times he'd mentioned that he valued her company. She realized suddenly his form was retreating further and further away and rushed to catch up. I know what that feels like.... That loneliness. She sighed inwardly looking at him sadly. I wish.... She paused in that thought before it completed itself. She couldn't....
 
 “My c-company is an easy p-payment... B-but,” she said finally, trying to gather her wits.
 
 “But?” he asked curiously. She wrinkled her nose as she focused on trying to make her statement with out betraying her thoughts.

“S-seems as though I c-could offer more,” she shrugged a little, “It d-doesn't l-look like an easy p-process.”
 
 “You brought me aloe and you're offering more Ginger,” he shrugged, “These will be as much yours as anyone's.” She bit her lip again and nodded a little. Inwardly she committed to go regularly to check on the aloe and ginger plants for clippings and root gathering. It would give her a reason to visit more. She smiled a bit at him. They walked the rest of the way in silence, hers mostly concentrating on keeping pace with him with out any discomfort. After they passed through the threshold to the hall and he offered some quiet words to the statue of Lucinda they settled in one particular work area.

 “Alright....did you say you tried this before?” he asked cutting into her thoughts. She brought her attention back around to the present.
 
 “W-well.. S-some... Th-the c-curative th-things...” she offered uncertainly. He started organizing things on the table they'd arrived at.
 
 “How did those go for you?” She wrinkled her nose with his question.
 
 “M-more b-black then g-green...” she admitted with no small amount of embarrassment.  
 
 “That well?” he grinned, “I've been there. Well it's not unlike cooking. I found being in a hurry for either usually doesn't turn out well...” She nodded a little.
 
 “Or f-frustrated...” she made a slight face recalling her last teacher. He grinned at her and began to check on the flame under the kettle. She turned her thoughts wholly onto his lesson and away from the past or anything beyond trying to make green curatives in stead of black ash.

[Rowana]

Oclar 22, 1427

Anna lay quietly, letting the warmth from Connor's presence sooth her. She kept her eyes closed and focused on his breathing and the feel of his hand. As he slipped closer to sleep his hand slowly relaxed and eventually hung limply in her grasp. She waited for his even, slow breathing, then another long while after that. Only then did she open her eyes.

The room was quiet. There was only the vague sounds of the other rooms at the inn leaking through occasionally, and the two of them. She listened, felt, smelled, looked... She focused on every sound. She memorized every warm breath from Connor, still carrying the scent of fruit. She let her eyes drift over to his face, observing every line, every flicker of movement under the lids of his eyes. She knew this moment would never come again, that there might never another moment like it. She couldn't bear the thought of sleeping... Not now... Not in this moment.

It was with her will power alone that she did not reach out to touch him, or curl tightly against him. He was exhausted, soul weary even. He probably needed rest more then anything else. In a way she had a deep sympathy for his loss, if it could be called that. Eldárwen, Anna's friend and Connor's love... Eldárwen was not gone, for certainly there would have been some sort of search, some sort of word to come back to Connor, something... Eld simply had vanished from their lives. Guilt washed over Anna and stung her. Eldárwen was her friend, one of the closest of her friends. Yet.... Here she was, with Connor. She closed her eyes. Hot tears threatened to well up and spill over. She took one steadying breath.... then another.... In her mind she saw the image of Connor from the night before. He'd sounded so lost, hurt, sad.... so alone. Anna opened her eyes slowly and looked at him again, sleeping peacefully. Before she could stop herself, she reached across with her free hand and tucked his hair behind his ear. She held her breath and bit down hard on the inside of her lip, waiting for him to wake.... But he did not.

A hot tear rolled down her cheek and she bit down firmly on the inside of her mouth. A part of her wanted to take it all back. It wanted to remain true to Eldárwen's trust, remain true to her friendship with Connor, by respecting what was between Eld and he. Every moment she spent in Connor's presence, like this or otherwise.... That part became smaller.... quieter.. She cared for him, probably more then he realized. She wanted to take care of him as she had this last night and this morning, to sleep next to him, hold him, comfort him, so many other things... She sighed softly and let the tears spill over quietly.

She had to decide... Follow her heart down this path, or leave it all together. It would be easier on them both if she abandoned it now rather then later. She bit down on the inside of her lip, turning her eyes to the ceiling of their room. She thought of how she felt now.... How her feelings had shifted during the long trip to and away from Swampsedge..... How her heart had ached when they had parted company for a time after that. She knew where her heart wanted to be... Slowly she turned her head to look at him again. I want to be here... Like this... I can not abandon him. She knew that if she stepped away from this path now it would hurt them both. I think I would rather face an angry Eldárwen then hurt him that way... The thought chilled her, but she knew it to be the truth, and not some fantasy seeming, or wishful thinking. She searched Connor's slumbering features for some hidden answer. If she was honest, she had already decided. Those few weeks ago when she'd pressed that Ilsarian dust into his hand, in that instant, she had decided. Now.... Now it was up to him.

She'd meant what she had said about having no expectations of Connor. He likely did not even know what he himself wanted. He had so much to work through, so much hurt to heal. She could not let herself to press yet another need upon him. She would help where he would allow, and wait for his heart to know what it wanted. It could be that he wished to wait for Eld after all. Anna hoped he would see his way to caring for her, but she would not expect anything from him. Even if it wasn't her, there would always be this moment. In this moment, neither of them were lonesome, neither of them suffered in silence, and both of them understood. Whatever he decided, she would cherish every moment she was offered. Even if he could care for her as she desired him to, it could not be forever. She blinked away more tears and sniffled softly.

Her mouth ached from the biting, trying to keep herself still and quiet so she would not disturb his rest. She tried to turn her mind from these things, but it was all around her. She closed her eyes and searched for the inner calm that would quell the tears and sniffles. Could she do this? Could she walk away from her longest love forever? How could she hurt her friend so? Even if Connor chose other then her.... She would have to choose. She would not offer Connor a half heart. There was a long moment of indecision.

     Still deciding on a direction? Connor's voice echoed playfully back at her. No... No she was certain about direction, now. It was only the realizing that she had chosen, that she already knew the way. She knew the way.... Making each moment count, living with out regret, the way she used to... The way she wanted to. Even if this, was all there was, this was enough. She would always love Plen, how could she not? She closed her eyes, biting down on her lip once again. Choosing between them seemed almost.... hollow. Her blasphemous love would always be there, and she would have to accept that. Her deep care for her friend would as well, but neither were present. Neither had been in so long.... Neither seemed to want to be present. So guilt she would bear, but regret? ....Never again.

She curled her fingers around Connor's gently. She took a slow breath in, and eased it out just as slowly. In the exhale she put in every ounce of indecision, hesitation, fear.... She breathed them out of her body, ridding herself of the poison that would hurt him. She drew in another breath and pressed out the desire to deny herself, the need hold herself aloof, the need to protect herself from Connor. The tension left her with those breaths. The guilt did not, and she knew it would never. There would always be the guilt owed to Eldárwen and Plen.

[Rowana]

He looked a bit remorseful, however, squeezed her hand lightly. “There is something I need to do, when we leave here...” She nodded a little, slightly puzzled, then blinked and he was gone. His voice floated back to her, “Anna, I want you to use my home as you will... stay there, use it as a passing shelter for you and Lindel, whatever need suits you. And when I return...” She'd leaned forward to interrupt him with a kiss, but nothing was there. Just empty space.

“When I return, we'll see where the moment takes us.” He said from someplace. She opened her eyes and looked to the empty space. It was dark and cold. There was a disorienting moment, like the world suddenly fell away from her and sent her spinning.

“I... I'm af-fraid... “ she whispered mournfully and suddenly she halted her movement. Her words caused him to open his eyes, a reflection of his surprise, not at her speaking but at what she said. After a few moments he whispered in return.

“Of what?”

“Of t-today ending... Of,” She paused long, “M-moving from this sp-spot... Of....” another long pause, “Of th-the past...” she finally finished. There was a long silence.

“Would you like to know what I think?” he had asked. She nodded a little and she heard him take a preparatory breath. “Today will end whether we wish it or not, and if we live it in fear of such, it will only end that much sooner,” There was a brief pause as he took another breath. “The past is what brought us to this place, to this moment. For better or worse, it is what it is, and we should not fear what has already happened...” There's another pause for a breath. “And as for moving from this spot...'' She felt the touch of his thumb lightly caress the hand of hers that was linked with his. “...that you should not fear either, for it is the one thing you can control.” She shook her head and tears sprang forth anew.

“But, you've gone.” She whispered sorrowfully.

Anna sat upright suddenly, waking from the dream with a gasp. Her head spun a bit from the sudden shift between dream and waking. The disorientation of memory and dream blending left her at a bit of a loss for a few moments. She closed her eyes and let the gentle sway of the boat calm her, then laid back against her cot. She pulled the blanket over her in a poor substitute for the arms she wished for. It had only been two days and already she'd committed her heart fully.... With all the longing and agony that came with it.

“Magic keep you...” His voice floated back to her, the last words he'd uttered before they parted. Sadness descended once again, having done so several times on this trip. She'd learned to combat it with the other memories of those two days. Though it ebbed the fears and sadness it built up the hope. Of that too she was afraid but..

“It is only time apart,” she chided herself once again. She called up the memory of his eyes opening and falling on hers. The first sight of the morning, amber tones swirled with flecks of blue and green and brown. It was an autumn day condensed down into two eyes. She smiled lightly and recalled the look... The look she wished would never turn away from her.

Consciousness faded slowly as a myriad of memories drifted across the surface of her mind.

[Rowana]

Mai 14, 1428

 

 

 

“You're back!” Lindel whispered from where he sat on her belly, repeating his already stated declaration and pinning her into the grass with a playful grin. She knew her backside would hurt from the effect of the pouncing but for the moment she didn't care. Wiednihm sat beside them both with his large tongue lolling good-naturedly as he watched them both. His large form blocked nearly anything she'd want to see or not see on her right side.

“Of c-course I'm b-back,” she answered a touch sarcastically, “You'd n-not have b-been able to knock me t-to the g-ground oth-therwise.” He grinned at her turning down right impish. She narrowed her eyes at him and felt suddenly very suspicious, “Wh-what have y-you b-been into n-now? Pl-please Katia, t-tell me you d-did not p-put frogs in C-connor's bath again....”

Lindel only remained silent, something about his demeanor answering in the negative to her question, but not giving any hints to what he was so pleased about. “Well g-good, I don't w-want t-to have to cl-clean that t-tub again for a l-long t-time.” She smiled at her son caringly and ruffled his hair, “Wh-what are you about?” she asked with her suspicion eating away at her again. His expression changed to something almost scary, clearly thinking himself cleaver beyond measure.

“He's home,” Lindel whispered almost gloating.

“Wh-who's h--” she caught her breath in mid-question, suddenly hoping Lindel meant who she hoped he did. She sat upright, some inner strength allowing her to move the boy enough to get that movement started. He hopped off of her the rest of the way giggling quietly.

Anna directed her eyes towards the house, not really seeing for a few steps as she started to run. She had left all her things on the ground where Lindel had knocked her over and some vague notion tried to surface about going back to collect them. Her hood fell back in her sudden rush and then halting, and something came into her sight. Blue... She forced her eyes to focus, trying to focus the sudden storm of emotions into something manageable until she knew...

His dark hair and hazel eyes searched her as she finally seemed able to make her vision unblur. Her breath stopped involuntarily and her mind raced. What would he want? Did he still care for her? So much time had passed. A sharp pang of uncertainty and fear gripped her as she searched his face for some clue. It seemed a long moment, they stared at one another from a distance that was both far and close. She could feel her insides begin to tremble as fear took a good grip on her, but suddenly....

His eyes and expression lit with a smile... A true smile. Relief flooded her, as well as every moment of longing and care that had passed in the months he'd been gone. With the rush came tears unbidden, tears she'd have no hope of holding back even if she'd had the presence to try. She took off at a run towards him before she'd even realized she was moving. Whether he moved at all she couldn't seem to recall, but with in moments she'd leapt up and wrapped herself around him in an embrace that she hoped spoke all the words she'd wished to say but couldn't think of. She buried her face against his neck, almost afraid that he'd vanish at the touch of her skin to his as he'd done in so many dreams before, but he did not vanish. His arms tightened around her and time started to slow somehow.

It was a few moments before she heard Lindel giving away her secret pain, in whispers. She stiffened, too mortified to bother with being upset at the boy. Nothing changed in the warm embrace around her and again relief surged through her like a sudden rush of warm blood in her cold veins. It was almost painful... She clung more tightly and the world drifted away to nothing but her hold and being held.

Suddenly she felt as if she could live her life in that moment and never want for anything again...