Reflections of Brisbane

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Entry 1:

I am not sure how I wound up here in Hlint or what my purpose holds. I only sought to find my father and now I find that everything I thought I knew is becoming askew. So many new faces and new things to learn, I have even turned from my inherant path of arcane. There is just something so magnetic about the animals and trees I couldn't resist, especially since when I first arrived here the people seemed so cold.... Except for him, he had a grand presence I couldn't resist. In time I met others to offer friendship to but my thoughts of him only grew fonder, silly really I had never even spoke to him with more than my eyes. Then by Katias grace I was offered an opportunity to get to know him... and tonight we spent a beautiful time upon an over look near a pond. It was the most magical time of my life, never have I felt such feelings before. Even now as a run through the treacherous desert, I need to get better with my geography less I get myself killed, I feel inside of me that it is his grace and my lady katia's keeping me safe under such unlikely circumstances. Perhaps the path I thought so inherant was completely wrong or so it seems. *she smiles lightly as she continues running through the manticore laden lands hopeful for the future for the first time*

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Entry 2:

I have learned a great many things from my dear green priest since coming to this land. Finding Katia has been an immense blessing, filling a previously ever-present hole in my heart, but I have also found a great many trials now fill my path.  I've began to notice that so many people have turned a deaf ear the plea's of the earth mother.  Just last night in Hlint there was an invasion of Mephits. Erag said he thought the only way to rid the town of them was to burn 1000 staves of oak. People were so eager to rush in and destroy the serenity of the forest with out thought. I plead that there must be a better way, and erag then admitted that there could be a much less destructive solution with a little research. A rare tree, so much less would have been needed, but the mob was so frenzied that most did not even hear. By Katia's grace my plea's were heard and the raid on the forest was postponed for another night, though I am afraid to think how soon that night may approach. Tonight my prayers will be for strength, strength to aid the Green Priest in defending those who can not do it alone.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Entry 3:

As of late there has been a watery woman crossing my path often. She goes by the name of Shara and seems to have a bit of a fascination with Plenarius and myself, though I am unsure as to why.  She even appeared in his home as we were decorating. She spun some threats which I thought to be quite idle, and disappeared. I soon learned she was true to her word.

It was an average night standing about in Hlint chatting with Plen and a new face in town and next thing I knew I saw nothing. When I finally awoke I was in a cage in a strange place Id never seen before. Shara said something about madness I don't know, I was not really paying her much attention. I just sat and prayed to katia to aid my dear Plen in finding me.  I am ot sure how long I was in that cage, the torture was fierce and I eventually just blacked out. The last thing I recall her saying to me is...."Haha your dear Plenarius is dead" How relieved I was when I finally opened my eyes again and he the first that I saw. He and several others had come to my aid... Alexander whom has aided me before and the rest Id only seen about town. I owe them all a great debt. Hopefully a time will come when I can repay them as deserving. Lastly but certainly not leastly Katia herself graced us with her divine presence. It was one of the most amazing moments i think I shall ever see.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

I finally met Rhizome. After all Plen has spoken of him I was quite a bit nervous, though I think things went well. The master druid offered to mentor me. What a fabulous honor that shall be. I've been meeting so many interesting people as of late. Today I met an elf named Anadelonbrin. He spoke very little common. I realized that I can understand elven quite well,...perhaps due to my heritage or maybe because I over heard my mother speaking it a bit growing up,.... though I can speak nary a word. Perhaps we can aid each other in learning. I would love to be able to speak to my father in his native tounge should the day ever arise that I finally meet him. I hope my mother sends me a letter soon with more information of him, she must realize by now that her attempts to keep the knowledge from me will not stop my search.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

A simple entry today.. more of a note to self.... Approach ships with caution, avoid if possible. Funny...I used to really enjoy sailing. Perhaps that feeling will return in time.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Dearest Mother,

Its closing in on 3 years since I left in search of my father with what little information you provided me with. I know I have sent you information on how to contact me and written you letters, yet ive heard nothing in return. I had hoped that you would see I am not going to stop seeking him and that you may send me a little bit more to go on, or at least set me a letter telling me how things are at home, but I still sit empty handed. Much has happened as of late. I will fill you in in hopes that, even though I do not hear back from you, you are reading and taking interest in my life.  

Ive been learning so much and Ive met so many. Someday you will have to meet my dear Plenarius he has taught me so much since he first graced my presence.  I am also learning the way of the druid... like my father...I hope this doesn't displease you too much though even as I write this I am sure it will as I have all but turned away from my mage studies. I still practice what I have learned but do not persue it further, instead I focus on nature and balance. I can talk to animals now and its amazing. They know so much.  

I have also learned I have a staunch hatred of ships and oceans. I loved them at first so powerful and free, but now I fear I'll never enjoy a ship again, provided I can even drag my carcass onto one again. I suppose the final straw was going to sleep in an inn and waking up after a horrible nightmare on the docks in a city miles upon miles from where I went to sleep. Have you ever heard of a creature called a mindflayer?

But I digress, I suppose Ive rambled enough, at least until I hear back from you and know that my ink is not being wasted. I hope this letter finds you in good health and spirits. Please write me soon.

Your ever loving daughter
Brisbane

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Still no word back from Ademia...I think Ill start calling her that rather than mother, shes never really played the part of a mom well. If she wasn't so selfish and bitter I would probably have already found my father and now she is disapperaing from me as well.  Last I knew she was somewhere south of Prazis though she is probably long gone from there now too. At least I know I won't have to comb the forests to find her, she wont go near those.

An interesting possible development though, I was talking to someone whom Ive come to regard as a great friend. He seemed to perk interest at my mothers name, like he knew her. Could this man ive come to respect actually be my father, or if not, perhaps he knows someone else whom it could be. Maybe I won't need as much help from mom as I thought.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

I think I shall take a month or so and travel home... or at least the last place I knew my mother called home. I'd like to see if she is still there and if not perhaps some clues as to where she has run off to. Often when she disappears she leaves the maid behind for a time to make it look as if she is still there. Hopefully I can come across something, Ive so many new questions to ask of her.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

What a time the last few months have been. I don't even know where to begin, perhaps with what has brought me out of my home in the first place, the search for my father.  I traveled home to see about my mother but to no avail. She and even the maid had departed, my letter left crumpled on the table. Perhaps she knew I would come for her and wanted me to see she read it and cared not. Now I have two parents to find. I am quickly coming to think that her reasons for keeping me from my father and the world were much more selfish than she would like to let on. Perhaps it was for her own shame and not his.

The Illithids seem to have taken hold on Hlint. They've affected my mind once I'll not allow it to happen again. Ive found an item the have left in my pack. For some reason I am compelled to hang on to it, though I watch it carefully.  I believe the Illithid are what caused Duur's assault on the Smithy. Im sure he wouldn't have acted out like that on his own. The trial went well...if there even was a trial... thats a confusing topic so Ill lay it to rest. Suffice it to say Duur was set free though I fear he doesn't seem quite the same.

Also, the red fog continues to grow worse. It occured again in Hlint with no one else around who had dealt with it so I decided to travel in alone. I figured of those present my chances were greatest to find something since I had seen it before. I asked Malakai for the appropraite buffs, he hasn't been right since the encounter with the lich, and he obliged me with what was left of himself. I delved in to find all of the Dwarven tombs ravaged and a vampire calling himself Lothac. He claimed to be looking for the great Dwarven Sage and undead slayer to Vorax. After much research and talking to nearly every dwarf I encountered I maneged to find some information. The King and Queen of the Ulgrids and the Healer of Vorax were all kind enough to bestow me with the great legend of Kothac the Armorsmith. Brac'ar aided us in getting more information from the tight knit community of Shoufal. Much to out dismay we found the tomb of the Legendary Dwarf empty.  I fear what this could mean. I only hope that the people of Layonara learn to heed the warnings given to them.

The storms also continue and grow worse in intensity. I have seen a vision of a ravaged island.  Triba, Lueanne, Plen and myself set out to ascend the heights of the Berhagens and collected Enzo on the way.  What we saw at the top was frightening to say the least. The storm held the faces of the damned. Before we could climb back down Milara showed himself and made a play on his power. We all knew we stood no chance against him, so I am not sure why he felt it necesary to flex his muscle on us. I am at a loss for how to contend with this force. I still lay awake wondering who it was that aided us there....

[IceDragonDuvessa]

A strange feeling of losing control of my form has started to come over me. The other night Plen mentioned something of a bear and next thing I knew I was standing there as a mighty bear. I am noticing it happening often. When I lose my temper its just natural seeming for me to turn bear, or when Im in a hurry Ill begin running and Ill find myself with the sleek body and muscles of a cheetah. I wonder if I am begining to turn to the path Plen and I spoke of so long ago. What did he say? The soul is the only constant. I will continue to fight to keep control of myself though I am not sure how much longer my will shall hold out. I should talk with Plenarius of these feelings and perhaps my mentor Rhizome.

[orth]

Plenarius wakes up one morning asleep under a tree in the Dinen and finds a neatly folded parchment in his lap, it reads:

Dearest Brisbee,

It’s been such a time since I received that last letter from you. To read that you left the path of your heritage was almost too much for me to bear. The long line of matron wizardess’ has been broken as I had always known would be so. Perhaps with that it is time to come clean with you. I never honestly thought that you would bring anything but the brightest joy to your father; in actuality it was my fateful attempt rectifying my own actions to alter your destiny. I tried to keep you from the lands and creatures that I knew that you would come to hold above all else.

When I was a young girl my mother told me that I would break in the family line, that I would cause the end of the Orinda mages. I fought that with every fiber I had in me, I buried myself in my studies refusing to admit that it could be possible. The only person I allowed even remotely close to me was Ndezda, the woman that you came to know as our maid and your nanny. I remember the day that my world changed like it was yesterday. I was sitting at my desk, in front of the window, buried in a pile of dusty tomes full of magical theory. I looked out the window and saw a man like no other I’ve seen to this day. A beautiful elven man with a light step, it looked as if the whole world was in his sway. I tried to ignore him but I couldn’t resist his charms. He showed me places and things that I never dreamed I would see. Creatures of all forms followed in his footsteps, with a wave and the utterance of a sound they happily did his bidding, and he theirs. He happily stayed with Ndezda and me for the short time he stayed, though I don’t think she approved. She always tried to remind me of my vow to not stray my studies and finally with his departure she pointed out how much I really had failed my word. Realizing this I packed my things and moved to a more solitary place where I would not see such distractions, I moved to a temple of Lucinda. This is the time that I realized he had left me with child. At first I was overjoyed, this soon turned to fear, and then loathing. I came to realize the meaning of the warning; I would be the last in the line of mages because my child would stray...not me.

I began immediate meditation on the issue and begged Lucinda for guidance. It was then that I decided to hide you from the world and to force you to learn the ways of the mage, hoping this would break the prophecy. I moved you around and kept you locked away keeping you from learning to love nature or finding someone that could help you on your path. Deep down I knew the day would come that you would leave to seek your destiny, so I kept the identity of your father to myself and made up the story of you brining him shame to stop you from trying to find him.
Though I am sure that this offers little solace, I see now that my actions were wrong. I made you miserable and I sullied your father in your eyes and all others who crossed my path. I hope that in my coming clean that it will begin to repair some of the damage that has been done. He may have been a promiscuous drifter but he was a good man. He took care of the lands and the creatures of it, was wise beyond his years, and was kind to all… A follower of the life giver I am sure that he will be most upset at the years he has missed with the life he has given himself.

I am happy to hear that you have managed to find someone to help you on your path. Hold on to him tightly and treat him better than I treated my one love. Plenarius sound like an exceptional person, keep him dear to your heart. I will end this letter saying this: You will not here from me again. I have done enough damage to the lives of those around me. Ndezda has past on recently and I feel I have not done her life justice either. I will be retreating to spend my last years alone with the books I have held so dear throughout my whole life. Good luck on your search for your father I am sure that you will have no trouble finding a druid with the notoriety that Rhizome has. When you find him, please tell him I am sorry. I doubt that will offer much rectification for the years I have deprived the two of and the damage I may have done to his good name, but I hope it will help at least for him to see that I know I was wrong.

Love and Warm Wishes,
Your Mother
Ademia Orinda

[IceDragonDuvessa]

As I sit here on Xantril and watch my love and new found father sleep I swim with emotion. When I set out on this search I think that I never really expected to find him, now here I am watching him sleep.  I don't think that I could be happier with how things have turned out. My mentor, my loves best friend, someone that I had already learned to respect.... my father, and that he is happy and accepting of it as well is more of a blessing than I could ever have hoped for 4 years ago when I left behind my life. Though that fear was stemmed from my mothers poison tounge bred of her own self loathing. It saddens me a bit to learn that the woman that actually raised me has passed on but I think what bothers me most is that I am not more upset about it.  She was a generally mean spirited woman but she always made sure I was well fed and taken care of. I guess in light of my new found family something like that seems small in comparison. That may sound cold but I had already made my choice to leave that part of my life behind and I do not regret that decision for one moment.  

*she smiles softly and slips the book back in her pack looking to Plenarius and then Rhizome who is softly cuddled up to one of the only women she calls friend, Amelia. She curls up next to Plen snuggling softly into him and udders the words almost to herself*

Goodnight Father...Goodnight Love

[IceDragonDuvessa]

*she pulls her now slightly worn journal out of her pack and dusts it off thinking to herself that this entry is long over due*

After nearly five years of absolute bliss with my dear Plenarius he has decided to ask me to be his bride. I don't even know how to begin to describe the perfectness in which he went about the proposal.  He took me to an overlook, below was spelled out Marry Me? with wild flowers. He brought many of our bear and bird friends along as well. I was speechless. Even when the Lady of the Land gave us her blessing and the forest dwellers (nymphs and dryads and treants) passed through to express their pleasure I could not utter a word I was so overwhelmed with happiness. Every day with Plen is better than the one before. I thank the mother each waking moment for the blessed life she has bestowed me with. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect lover or a better father.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

*she holds her tattered book at arms length and looks over it worn covers. Slowly she thumbs through it reading through the journal notes and tracing the many drawings and notes with her fingertips. A tear trails across her cheek as the memories shes been holding at bay for a time come flooding back to her. She takes the sleek quill in her hand with an exaggerated sigh and murmers as she begins to write once more in her softly flowing script of green ink pausing a moment in thought as to where to begin*  

My thoughts return to my mother and the old maid as I watch our child grow. Barrett is so big now, I long for him to know his mother and of the life she once led before.  I've changed so much since then...   Spending time with father has been wonderful. I am slowly learning to wrap my mind more firmly around the elven tongue. I had some grasp of it from my studies as a child but to hear the flowing words from your own blood is like a musical sonnet rippling deftly through the air. I've been learning a lot from father recently. My ties to nature are growing ever stronger, despite Milara's thoughts [/COLOR]

*she pauses in recolection*

Perhaps he was right... maybe my tie to nature is not strong... in any casy if its not...its growing ever more so each day.    Plen has been met with a higher calling to our mother Katia... hes not around as much as he is often soaring the skies to her will. I am increasingly thankful for our friends. Ozymandias Llewellyn *its written with an extra flipping curl* never ceases to amaze or confuse me. When first I met the bard I was terrified. I never thought that I would come to hold him as one of my closest friends and mentor. He has even invited me into his home and welcomed me to his library whenever the need or whim arises. I believe I shall go see if he would like to research with me these drawings of the runes and ritual.

*she smiles softly to herself then frowns a bit*

 I have met an internal conflict in the aquisition of these runes. Perhaps my course of action was a bit harsh. Slaying Lia, I have to admit, was something that I have wanted to do so many times. She runs her mouth on the foolishness of others while bouncing about and acting fooloshly. Had it not been for my respect for Remiel and my worries of my actions on the balance, I would have let her lie there for the snakes to feast upon. She rose up to call me a trecherous wench... I think she has little room to speak on such a matter. I am sure her time for retribution will arrive soon enough.  

*she turns an eye to the sky and smiles softly as she watches Plen soar through the clouds and whispers quietly as she shuts her book and holds it to her chest*

 I hope you can return again soon Love...

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Plen returned for a short time and left as swiftly as he came. He had adventure to seek and things to take care of the were apparently much more important. *sighs heavily* It seems since the aquisition of his postion I have taken more of a side step than I had previously anticipated.   Father has given me a room in his house I keep many of my belongings there and divide my time betweent he forests adn Ozy's libraries. He started to aid in teaching me the elven tongue but it seems to disgust him to speak so Ive mostly stuck to reading books on it.   Lately I much prefer the solitude of the forest to the company of most. I have been left behind for dead by those that I have trusted far to many times. I think that Enzo was the final straw. I risked my life to save that of an idiot elf and Enzo's fast found new love. Enzo all but pushed me out of the way completely to get to her... he had known her for a day. This is the story of my life. Not strong enough, not fast enough, not useful enough. Left for dead by family, friend and love.   Traveled with Enzo the other day and hes no trust left for me. I guess I don't blame him I did break his ribs. He deserved it though and I regret nothing... maybe only that I almost forgave him...I regret that. His healer for the temple he planted in the mists of the forest had taken leave with a nymph. I don't trust him... he was clearly lying about knowing that elf and then he dropped hints about someone amongst us being a shadow druid or some such. I think that he was refering to himself or maybe that Rodlin guy. He seemed awfully defensive when I asked him about the assasination attempt and inferred that I should not be allowed along any more. Quick to dismiss me for a simple question... perhaps he was scared.   I will continue my studies under Ozy though it seems he has taken a turn for the more dismal as well lately he is one of the few that have shown me friendship. I am sure its only a matter of time before he decides to leave me for dead as well... though I don't think it would have the effect on me as I expect it from him and am generally surprised at the kindness he shows me.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Plenarius has decided that his faith is more important than I am and our marriage has pretty much ceased to exist in all aspects but legality. I'd say that saying goodbye is difficult but as it stands I have not seen him in months anyhow so I suppose dissolving our marriage is more like a breath of fresh air. I am Brisbane again and not Plen's wife...an individuality that I really have never known. I married him before anyone ever knew who I was without him. I wonder if anyone will even know me anymore, I imagine I will face a lot of animosity...Plen is a very loved person...I... am not. I will still follow nature but I am not sure I can continue to worship the one that took my loves attentions so fully from me...  Barrett has gone to live with Legodia... I am sure that his life will be better there than with either Plen or I. He is still too young to travel the lands with us but he is at an age where learning is imparitive. Legodia will teach him to respect the lands his father and I love and fight to protect then when he is older I will take him and show him the world and what it is his mother does when he is learning with Legodia.

[IceDragonDuvessa]

*No less than three times tonight I tried to speak with the group about what the dark ranger told me.... and everytime I was cut off and berated by Enzo. Talking about how I say things to make may faults easier.... I say things because they need to be heard not because I am out to make people think I'm faultless or feel better about myself. He really is one of the stupidest people I've met...I never even got past the first part because I was always cut off...  People think thats its ok to run into a forest cut down trees and put up a temple... but if a tree ran into a city and cut down a building to put up a forest well that would be a travesty.  The population of Layonara grows too quickly and people go out on mindless hunts to stuff Johans cloak room or to make countless sets of leather armors... but when nature pushes back then suddenly nature must be stopped. What are these fool people going to do when theyve hunted all the animals into extinction and they can't make their armors or pay for thier cloak in flesh? But when a druid speaks out in defense of the lands... well she must be evil!

[IceDragonDuvessa]

*Bris pulls her journal out with an empty look on her face. She holds it in her hands and stares off into the distance looking past her fathers house a shell of the vibrant naieve girl she once was. She adjusts her new black and white outfit and rubs her neck where her holy symbol of Katia once hung... she almost smiles a wicked smile as she feels its absence. She pulls the jeweled flower from behind ear where Ozy placed it and shrugs a bit dipping the stem into her ink well using it as a quill*

There is a place that I know of that was the begining of the end of my former self. I almost lost my soul there...I could feel it being wrested from me. For some reason I managed to avoid it but looking back now I wish it had taken me. Then I would have never had to know the hurt of feeling rejection from my father, my husband, my friends... Everyday I contemplate going back there and giving my soul to whatever lay beyond the gate, perhaps I yet will.  Yashilla held the flag of Pyrtechon...I have to admit I was captivated by it. The swirling flames made sense to me for the first time. Perhaps destruction is what these lands need. Devastation...clearing of the land so that nature may begin anew.

*she then stabs the flower into the soft earth next to her and drops her journal back into her sack leaning back on the cliff waving her hand through the spraw of the small waterfall*

[IceDragonDuvessa]

I spent a beautiful night with the bard by the lake. I know that hes a salacious thing.. I just can't help myself though... I love him. He gives me a small piece of my old self... and though he hurts me as well I fully expect it from him so it doesn't get to me as much.   I've made a list of people to pay some special attention to...I can't wait to cross them off one by one

*she grins almost evilly and puts her book back in the bag pulling out another titled "Elven Dialect"*

[IceDragonDuvessa]

Spent the night with Ozy again. This time looking at shifters tower. Some foolish thing ran through and told us to get a room in the inn... Im not sure why though as we were just standing there talking. I'll add him to my list if I ever find out who he is. Wouldn't be caught in an inn even if we were doing something more... intimate. I may not have the fondness of katia I once did but I still carry my love and respect for out of doors and nature.   Made a new outfit... red and black very unlike somethin a follower of Katia would wear... I liked it, Ozy liked it, Connor happened past he liked it too. Was nice to see Connor its been a long time. I havn't learned to hate him yet... and I've known him a long time so maybe I won't. Though I knew Enzo a long time too and look how quickly he cast me aside. I guess we will see.