Riley's Journal

[Yar Ydnar]

Dissention in the desert:

I really don't know how to start this.  So many people.  So many parts. It should have a beginning but I don't have a clue in my muddled mind on where that should be.  *sighs*  I'll just start writing and let come what may.  I guess the big picture first.  We, Sehky, Keela, Gel, and I, discovered some strange artifacts in the desert and soon after a significant increase in the undead throughout the area.   Come to think of it there has been an increase in reports of undead throughout the realm.  Anyway we came to find two items in the desert.  I took a whip from a fallen mummy.  Not sure where Gel found the sensor.  Soon after finding these artifacts we were visited by a talking bone bat who said his master was an all powerfull lich.  One that controlled the undead.  And when I say controlled I mean he reigned them in and wouldn't let them wander the land.  Sounds like very strange behavior for a lich.  Anyway this bat creature said that his master kept the undead from wandering through the use of a whip, which I still have, and a book.  Which we didn't have.  Sehky asked the creature about this book and the bat said something regarding grave robbers and then something about a Dark Elf Mistress and a half man with a tattoo on his face.  That's all he knew, or claimed to know.  If we found them we would find the book.  Stood to reason that these robbers would have left the desert and since the tent village nearby was a Hafling settlement we decided to go there first.  On the way out of the desert we discovered the body of a Dark Elf Mistress.  She had been shot with powerfull shock arrows.  The bone bat was fluttering overhead yelling out she's the one, she's the one.  Seems we were now just looking for a tattooed hafling.

Upon entering the village there was a commotion near the pawners tent.  Seems that this "tattooed Hafling" named Bram was vomiting asps.  Literally puking up snakes.  Seems this book is cursed.  Well always being the profitier Bram was more worried about how much gold he would get for this book than disgorging a belly full of snakes in his bed while he slept.  Eventually we came to an agreement whereby I would give him some fish and Gel would remove the curse for the book.   He'd had enough of the asps by that time and was famished so he readilly took the deal.  He gave the book to Sehky.  Now we had all the pieces to give the lich.  We had yet to decide if we would actually give them to him.  The journey must be made first. Then we would decide.

We gathered a group of talented individuals well versed in adventuring.  Casters, singers, fighters.  We had all types and manor of persons. I'd sent word to Jillian to hurry and join us.  But when we started out she had yet to arrive.  She did arrive shortley after we entered the desert and was delayed by a flying, I guess lion, with riddles.  I left the riddle telling to others whether or not it was important to us I know not.  I was making my way back to Jillian as I felt her presence.  And I was not going to let her wander the landscape alone.  Once the riddling was done we proceeded and along the way we encountered the usual dangers the desert presents and the unusual.  Portals everywhere were opening and fire creatures pouring through.  We dispatched those that came and closed each portal in turn.  It seemed that round every corner there were mummies.  This continued until we came to a citadel, of sorts, where the writings on the walls indicated that inside was a mummified immortal king.  This is where Jillian was in her element.  She knew everything about the king and all required to put him to rest.   We needed his organs to place back into his body.  Once that was done he would be mortal again and could be dispatche to the next plane of existence.  Where these items we carried his organs?  Seemed unlikely.  While the group was contemplating whether or not the whip, book, and sensor cold be the kings organs William went into a deep trance and saw a possible horrendous future.  One that had an immense portal opening and thousands upon thousands fire creatures passing through to claim a new world.  He also said that time was a commdity we did not have.  We had to move and move now lest we miss the opportunity outright stop this invasion.  So we entered the citadel and again at every turn there  were mummies and constructs.  We discovered three alters. The first was sacrificial in nature.  While inspecting it a vampire materialized and was immediately struck down.   It carried on it's person one of the canopic jars containing a portion of the mummified king's organs.  But where to next?  The only exit was the entrance so we set about looking for some secret passage or door.  While doing so we were attached by a small squad of Dark Elves.  This lends more weight to the possibility of Dark Elves being at the heart of the matter.  That being said we did not encounter any more.   Meanwhile one of our party discovered a false wall, of sorts, and Jillian and I produced our picks and commenced picking our way through.  It didn't take long and we had made an opening large enough for entry.  There we found the second alter.  The inscription indicated that an offering of, the best, gems would please the watchers.  So looking about we could not help but notice that there wer four mithril statues, one on each corner, looking to the alter in the center of the room.  Lady Breanna had some fine diamonds so we placed one in each of th estatues hands and the room slightly shook and the the alter moved aside revealing another canopic jar and other items.  The voices bellowed from the statues that the offering was accepted and that all the items were for the taking.  Jillian took the jar.  Not sure who took the rest.  It was then that a portal opened.  Was this the way forward?  I suggested that we enter but others said we should ascertain it's purpose first.  William muttered something about hesitation and loosing and stepped throug hto the astonishment of many.  I followed close behind.  The others followed in kind.  Some not liking the idea but yet they came through.  Here was an alter and a sarcophagus.  There was a noise coming from inside the sarcophagus like someone, or something, scratching to get out.  We were leary of what was inside but we were there to release the king and if necessary make him mortal to kill him.  So we did.  At first we were ready to attack.  Which would have been foolish because he is immortal and to do so would have been the death of all of us.  He raved on and on about the curse of immortality and how he wanted it to end.  But he needed his organs.  All we had was his brain and spleen. We didn't have his heart.  His heart was being held by another.  This ... being... was the cause of all the recent undead in the desert and was amasing an unprecidented army of fire beings to invade.  We needed a champion. Someone to face this thing in mortal combat.  If that champion won then he, or she, would take the heart and allow the king to finally die.  But more importantly stop the invasion and the harness the undead.  It had to be me.  Not that I'm a champion, but, it had to be me.  All of th eparty girded me for battle.  The king himself gave me aid in the form of the power of ice for my blade.  When it was time and I could not be more ready he sent me on my way.  The others came too.  But could only watch. Any aid on their part during the battle would have voided the contract and doomed us.  I had to defeat this creature.  But I wasn't alone.  I had the blessings of many, the power of Toran, and most importantly the love of Jillian.  Yes I was ready.  He appeared. Arrogant. Cocky.  He asked me if I as ready to defend a world. I asked him if he was ready to loose one.  With that he launched himself at me and a flurry of blows ensued.  He was fast but my shield was equal to the task.  My blade found the mark over and over again.  He healed and I healed.  The flurry continued but then I heard, and felt, him cry in pain.  Not long after I struck the final blow and vanquished him forever. The instant he died the floating rock we fought upon began to fall.  Molten balls of fire falling everywhere. I quickly picked up the jar containing the heart and we all were transported back to the kings chamber.  Everyone was elated.  I was, and still am, exhausted.  So the final piece was in hand.  I placed the jar before the king and true to his word and wishes he inserted all the organs and faded to dust.  He is no more.  But before he went he set in motion that we all be transported to Center.  So he died and poof!  We are now here.  Just as if it were a dream.. A dream I'll not look forward to again.

That is the story in a nutshell.  To be sure there are more details that can be, and probably should be, included.  But those details do not interest me.  My dilema is .... is the conduct of myself and the three people I hold nearest my heart.  Jillian, whom I shall always love.  No matter the circumstance.  Sehky.  My love for him as a brother is without question.  I shall always standby him as I value his judgement and experience.  And then there is Keela.  The little sister I never had.  Her devotion to Sehky ad her ability bring people together is an art.  One that I admire.  I know that Keela has years of lifes experience over me.  And that she will walk her path long after I'm gone from a ripe old age.  But she is my little sister.  And I love her as such.

To see all three engaged in turmoil against one another. Words spoken that may never be recalled.  May never be forgotten.  I can only pray that those words are placed in proper situational context.  That they all see them for what they were.  And to let them pass.   For it to be otherwise would devistate me.

You see.  They were both right.  

Jillian was right for giving voice to the fact that we, seemingly, were going to assist a lich.  I'm sure many others had the same question.  Jillian just asked it.  It's instilled into her to fight and win over such creatures.  To have it any other way is contrary to her training and her beliefs.  I understand and respect that.  I love her for that and so much more.  Maybe....in my own blundering way I made it worse for her by siding with Sehky.  I admit I could have done better.  But Jillian should never be ignored.  She should never be used.  She should always be Jillian.  Yet.  Jillian was right.

Sehky was right.   We had no other course of action open to us.  As it was if we had delayed, as some suggested to get these items in our possession inspected, we would now be in a sea of firery death.  He had not stated that we would hand these over to the lich without first making sure at every turn that it would be the right thing to do.  He never said that we would just hand them over.  We had to make that journey.  And it didn't help my cause with Sehky when I sided with Jillian after he told her she could leave.  The fact that I stated outright to the group our overall intentions regarding the journey.  To decide our course of action once we got there. And lastly, and most firmly, announce that under no circumstance would I allow Jillian to wander back through the desert alone.  I was going forward.  And she was coming with me. Yet. Sehky was right.  

Keela was right.  She defended Sehky against the verbal barrage.  And not just from Jillian. And there were times when I sensed animosity between Sehky and her.  That should never be.  That's not my little sister.  Yet she was right.  And like Jillian she should never be ignored.  She should never be used.  She should always be Keela.  Yet.  She was right.

And then there is me.  I admitted earlier that I could have, should have, done things better.  

My interaction with Jillian was late.  I tried to lend support to her questioning of this venture but I failed on so many counts.  Was it because I was one of the planners of this mission?  Or was it because, like her, I can be head strong.  My path was set and nothing was going to deter me.  I don't know. All I know is that I need seasoning in this area. I need to get better.  I know this isn't true.  I know it in deepest parts of my being.  But it seemed as if Jillian didn't trust me in this matter.  I told her the plan.  Please trust me to act accordingly.  Ohh.  After it was done it was all water under the bridge. But still.  Please trust me to do the right thing.

With Sehky I'm rather confident I did the right thing by him.  He wanted me to take the leadership of the group.  I declined.  Could I have?  Yes.  I can lead.  Done it many times.  I'm sure I will lead again in the future.  But I have every confidence in Sehky's leadership.  He should have the same.  And it bothers me that he, seemingly, doesn't have the faith in my trust in him.  If it were otherwise I would have taken the leadership. But it wasn't necessary.  Additionally I would not have let him pass that mantle to anyone else either.  He knows how to lead.  He just needs to believe in himself.  Just as I beleive in him.

Keela. I have no issues with Keela.  She, as always, was just Keela.  Steady to the core.  How could anyone have issues with Keela?

Having said all this.  I still worry.  My love for Jillian is, and will forever be, unfaltering.  My love for Sehky and Keela moves in different circles. None the less it's there and earnest.  I must find someway to reconcile their differences.  And as I've already written. For it to be otherwise would devistate me.  - Riley finally succombs to exhaustion and falls asleep. The ink from his quill forever staining the pages in his journal -

[Yar Ydnar]

Dissention in the desert:

I really don't know how to start this.  So many people.  So many parts. It should have a beginning but I don't have a clue in my muddled mind on where that should be.  *sighs*  I'll just start writing and let come what may.  I guess the big picture first.  We, Sehky, Keela, Gel, and I, discovered some strange artifacts in the desert and soon after a significant increase in the undead throughout the area.   Come to think of it there has been an increase in reports of undead throughout the realm.  Anyway we came to find two items in the desert.  I took a whip from a fallen mummy.  Not sure where Gel found the sensor.  Soon after finding these artifacts we were visited by a talking bone bat who said his master was an all powerfull lich.  One that controlled the undead.  And when I say controlled I mean he reigned them in and wouldn't let them wander the land.  Sounds like very strange behavior for a lich.  Anyway this bat creature said that his master kept the undead from wandering through the use of a whip, which I still have, and a book.  Which we didn't have.  Sehky asked the creature about this book and the bat said something regarding grave robbers and then something about a Dark Elf Mistress and a half man with a tattoo on his face.  That's all he knew, or claimed to know.  If we found them we would find the book.  Stood to reason that these robbers would have left the desert and since the tent village nearby was a Hafling settlement we decided to go there first.  On the way out of the desert we discovered the body of a Dark Elf Mistress.  She had been shot with powerfull shock arrows.  The bone bat was fluttering overhead yelling out she's the one, she's the one.  Seems we were now just looking for a tattooed hafling.

Upon entering the village there was a commotion near the pawners tent.  Seems that this "tattooed Hafling" named Bram was vomiting asps.  Literally puking up snakes.  Seems this book is cursed.  Well always being the profitier Bram was more worried about how much gold he would get for this book than disgorging a belly full of snakes in his bed while he slept.  Eventually we came to an agreement whereby I would give him some fish and Gel would remove the curse for the book.   He'd had enough of the asps by that time and was famished so he readilly took the deal.  He gave the book to Sehky.  Now we had all the pieces to give the lich.  We had yet to decide if we would actually give them to him.  The journey must be made first. Then we would decide.

We gathered a group of talented individuals well versed in adventuring.  Casters, singers, fighters.  We had all types and manor of persons. I'd sent word to Jillian to hurry and join us.  But when we started out she had yet to arrive.  She did arrive shortley after we entered the desert and was delayed by a flying, I guess lion, with riddles.  I left the riddle telling to others whether or not it was important to us I know not.  I was making my way back to Jillian as I felt her presence.  And I was not going to let her wander the landscape alone.  Once the riddling was done we proceeded and along the way we encountered the usual dangers the desert presents and the unusual.  Portals everywhere were opening and fire creatures pouring through.  We dispatched those that came and closed each portal in turn.  It seemed that round every corner there were mummies.  This continued until we came to a citadel, of sorts, where the writings on the walls indicated that inside was a mummified immortal king.  This is where Jillian was in her element.  She knew everything about the king and all required to put him to rest.   We needed his organs to place back into his body.  Once that was done he would be mortal again and could be dispatched to the next plane of existence.  Where these items we carried his organs?  Seemed unlikely.  While the group was contemplating whether or not the whip, book, and sensor cold be the kings organs William went into a deep trance and saw a possible horrendous future.  One that had an immense portal opening and thousands upon thousands fire creatures passing through to claim a new world.  He also said that time was a commodity we did not have.  We had to move and move now lest we miss the opportunity outright stop this invasion.  So we entered the citadel and again at every turn there  were mummies and constructs.  We discovered three alters. The first was sacrificial in nature.  While inspecting it a vampire materialized and was immediately struck down.   It carried on it's person one of the canopic jars containing a portion of the mummified king's organs.  But where to next?  The only exit was the entrance so we set about looking for some secret passage or door.  While doing so we were attached by a small squad of Dark Elves.  This lends more weight to the possibility of Dark Elves being at the heart of the matter.  That being said we did not encounter any more.   Meanwhile one of our party discovered a false wall, of sorts, and Jillian and I produced our picks and commenced picking our way through.  It didn't take long and we had made an opening large enough for entry.  There we found the second alter.  The inscription indicated that an offering of, the best, gems would please the watchers.  So looking about we could not help but notice that there were four mithril statues, one on each corner, looking to the alter in the center of the room.  Lady Breanna had some fine diamonds so we placed one in each of the statues hands and the room slightly shook and the the alter moved aside revealing another canopic jar and other items.  The voices bellowed from the statues that the offering was accepted and that all the items were for the taking.  Jillian took the jar.  Not sure who took the rest.  It was then that a portal opened.  Was this the way forward?  I suggested that we enter but others said we should ascertain it's purpose first.  William muttered something about hesitation and loosing and stepped through to the astonishment of many.  I followed close behind.  The others followed in kind.  Some not liking the idea but yet they came through.  Here was an alter and a sarcophagus.  There was a noise coming from inside the sarcophagus like someone, or something, scratching to get out.  We were leary of what was inside but we were there to release the king and if necessary make him mortal to kill him.  So we did.  At first we were ready to attack.  Which would have been foolish because he is immortal and to do so would have been the death of all of us.  He raved on and on about the curse of immortality and how he wanted it to end.  But he needed his organs.  All we had was his brain and spleen. We didn't have his heart.  His heart was being held by another.  This ... being... was the cause of all the recent undead in the desert and was amassing an unprecidented army of fire beings to invade.  We needed a champion. Someone to face this thing in mortal combat.  If that champion won then he, or she, would take the heart and allow the king to finally die.  But more importantly stop the invasion and the harness the undead.  It had to be me.  Not that I'm a champion, but, it had to be me.  All of the party girded me for battle.  The king himself gave me aid in the form of the power of ice for my blade.  When it was time and I could not be more ready he sent me on my way.  The others came too.  But could only watch. Any aid on their part during the battle would have voided the contract and doomed us.  I had to defeat this creature.  But I wasn't alone.  I had the blessings of many, the power of Toran, and most importantly the love of Jillian.  Yes I was ready.  He appeared. Arrogant. Cocky.  He asked me if I as ready to defend a world. I asked him if he was ready to loose one.  With that he launched himself at me and a flurry of blows ensued.  He was fast but my shield was equal to the task.  My blade found the mark over and over again.  He healed and I healed.  The flurry continued but then I heard, and felt, him cry in pain.  Not long after I struck the final blow and vanquished him forever. The instant he died the floating rock we fought upon began to fall.  Molten balls of fire falling everywhere. I quickly picked up the jar containing the heart and we all were transported back to the kings chamber.  Everyone was elated.  I was, and still am, exhausted.  So the final piece was in hand.  I placed the jar before the king and true to his word and wishes he inserted all the organs and faded to dust.  He is no more.  But before he went he set in motion that we all be transported to Center.  So he died and poof!  We are now here.  Just as if it were a dream.. A dream I'll not look forward to again.

That is the story in a nutshell.  To be sure there are more details that can be, and probably should be, included.  But those details do not interest me.  My dilema is .... is the conduct of myself and the three people I hold nearest my heart.  Jillian, whom I shall always love.  No matter the circumstance.  Sehky.  My love for him as a brother is without question.  I shall always standby him as I value his judgement and experience.  And then there is Keela.  The little sister I never had.  Her devotion to Sehky and her ability bring people together is an art.  One that I admire.  I know that Keela has years of lifes experience over me.  And that she will walk her path long after I'm gone from a ripe old age.  But she is my little sister.  And I love her as such.

To see all three engaged in turmoil against one another. Words spoken that may never be recalled.  May never be forgotten.  I can only pray that those words are placed in proper situational context.  That they all see them for what they were.  And to let them pass.   For it to be otherwise would devistate me.

You see.  They were all right.  

Jillian was right for giving voice to the fact that we, seemingly, were going to assist a lich.  I'm sure many others had the same question.  Jillian just asked it.  It's instilled into her to fight and win over such creatures.  To have it any other way is contrary to her training and her beliefs.  I understand and respect that.  I love her for that and so much more.  Maybe....in my own blundering way I made it worse for her by siding with Sehky.  I admit I could have done better.  But Jillian should never be ignored.  She should never be used.  She should always be Jillian.  Yet.  Jillian was right.

Sehky was right.   We had no other course of action open to us.  As it was if we had delayed, as some suggested to get these items in our possession inspected, we would now be in a sea of firery death.  He had not stated that we would hand these over to the lich without first making sure at every turn that it would be the right thing to do.  He never said that we would just hand them over.  We had to make that journey.  And it didn't help my cause with Sehky when I sided with Jillian after he told her she could leave.  The fact that I stated outright to the group our overall intentions regarding the journey.  To decide our course of action once we got there. And lastly, and most firmly, announce that under no circumstance would I allow Jillian to wander back through the desert alone.  I was going forward.  And she was coming with me. Yet. Sehky was right.  

Keela was right.  She defended Sehky against the verbal barrage.  And not just from Jillian. And there were times when I sensed animosity between Sehky and her.  That should never be.  That's not my little sister.  Yet she was right.  And like Jillian she should never be ignored.  She should never be used.  She should always be Keela.  Yet.  She was right.

And then there is me.  I admitted earlier that I could have, should have, done things better.  

My interaction with Jillian was late.  I tried to lend support to her questioning of this venture but I failed on so many counts.  Was it because I was one of the planners of this mission?  Or was it because, like her, I can be head strong.  My path was set and nothing was going to deter me.  I don't know. All I know is that I need seasoning in this area. I need to get better.  I know this isn't true.  I know it in deepest parts of my being.  But it seemed as if Jillian didn't trust me in this matter.  I told her the plan.  Please trust me to act accordingly.  Ohh.  After it was done it was all water under the bridge. But still.  Please trust me to do the right thing.

With Sehky I'm rather confident I did the right thing by him.  He wanted me to take the leadership of the group.  I declined.  Could I have?  Yes.  I can lead.  Done it many times.  I'm sure I will lead again in the future.  But I have every confidence in Sehky's leadership.  He should have the same.  And it bothers me that he, seemingly, doesn't have the faith in my trust in him.  If it were otherwise I would have taken the leadership. But it wasn't necessary.  Additionally I would not have let him pass that mantle to anyone else either.  He knows how to lead.  He just needs to believe in himself.  Just as I beleive in him.

Keela. I have no issues with Keela.  She, as always, was just Keela.  Steady to the core.  How could anyone have issues with Keela?

Having said all this.  I still worry.  My love for Jillian is, and will forever be, unfaltering.  My love for Sehky and Keela moves in different circles. None the less it's there and earnest.  I must find someway to reconcile their differences.  And as I've already written. For it to be otherwise would devistate me.  - Riley finally succombs to exhaustion and falls asleep. The ink from his quill forever staining the pages in his journal -

[Yar Ydnar]

SOUL MOTHER VISIT.

   I was visited by the Soul Mother again last night.  Jillian, Zakariem and I were exploring the crypts north of Veil.  All was going well.  That is until we came upon a pack of vampires in the lower reaches of the crypt.  It was filled with all manner of vampires.  Most notably were those we could not see.  It was full of hafling rogue vampires that materialized on top of us.  I was sapped of all my strength immediately.  Jillian was heroically keeping me alive but it came to a point when she had to leave.  Just as I was collapsing to the floor the Soul Mother came to me and gently laid me down, kneeled over me and whispered "Five more".  With that she reached into my body and plucked a piece of me to take with her and then was gone.

   Jillian also found the bind stone but because the Mother was with me she was passed over.  Zakariem managed to escape.  

   I have five more.  Only five.  She'll not get them without a fight.  That I have promised Jillian.  I know it's a fools promise.  The Mother comes and goes at will.  Her visits are at the time of her choosing and when she visits there is no reprieve.  Only five more.

[Yar Ydnar]

A life together in doubt?

   Jillian, Zakareim, Sehky, and I heard reports of increased highway assaults in the area of the Crossroads near Dalanthar.  So we all decided to investigate. I was wondering about the makeup of the party being so close on the heals of the desert trip and this concern bore unwanted fruit midway during the trip when both of them turned cold to one another.  Words were said and even though they were working as a team to eliminate the bandit threat it was clear that Jillian was cold in Sehky's presence.  At one point Sehky told me he would leave and I stopped to talk with him.  I told him that if he felt that way to please wait until we were clear of the bandits.  While making my plea I noticed Jillian and Zakariem had back tracked to find us as they had ran ahead but stood off to give us privacy.  As I walked past Jillian she whispered to me she was sorry.  All I could do was whisper back that I knew.  She made the same whisper to me repeatedly throughout the remainder of the night.  And each time all I could say was, "I know love.  I know."  I desperately wish I could have said something else.  As I honestly believe she needed more from me.  But I didn't, and still, don't know what to say.  Is she sorry about the tension between her and Sehky, or that she's sorry about putting me through this .... this dilemma?  Matters not.  In the end I want her to be happy.  I want her to be at ease.

   I thought that maybe a change of scenery, and foe, would brighten her mood.  So to the peaks we went.  Sehky asked me what I wanted to do with him.  I responded that I wanted him to act as he had always had.  That he find them and pound them from a distance while we would provide the frontal assault.  He seemed relieved at that.  Not sure what Jillian felt as I didn't look at her at that time.  I do know that she pulled her hood farther over her head to more hide her features.  But that may have been to gird against the cold we were headed into.  In any event I wanted Sehky's bow at our backs.  Regardless of his faith he is quite efficient with that bow.  And I would be a fool to turn away such assistance.

   Normally Jillian does a little dance when fighting the undead.  She positively dances from one to the other.  She giggles, makes witty remarks, and is happy.  Not this time.  She was an undead killing machine as always but the dance was gone.  No witty remarks.  No giggling.  She was a machine.  That's all.  A machine.

   To change the scenery we even ventured into the wolf cave and almost cleared two levels.  There was one door, that I could see, to pass through to continue but Sehky gave counsel that it might not be wise to do so.  I have no issue with taking such counsel so we left.  But still Jillian was a machine.  It was time to end her pain so I stated it was time to make our way back to the Crossroads and settle up.  Just before we arrived Sehky asked Jillian if he could have a moment with her, in private, so I asked Zakariem to continue with me to the camp.  

   Although it seemed an eternity it wasn't long before they entered the camp.  Jillian was first to arrive, her hood drawn down as far as it would go.  She never said a word to me.  Just passed by and took a seat by the fire.  Sehky followed.  Quiet and reserved.  He sat by the stump on the opposite side of the fire away from Jillian.  I was in the middle.  Again.  Tried to engage in conversation with Jillian but she didn't answer.  It was obvious she would not talk with Sehky present.  And although I knew that, I wasn't going to punish Sehky.  So I held a short conversation about the wolf cave and how Ellis and I took Keela there.  Then I asked him to leave.  I had to talk to Jillian.  He understood and gracefully departed.  Then I turned my attention to one I love.

   Her hood was still drawn so I kneeled to look into her face.  She had been crying.  That would never do.  I sat beside her and gently pulled her hood back and kissed her tears away.  Then she spoke.  She said she was spoiled.  That she had gotten used to the idea of never being alone again.  It pains me to think she was ever alone.   We talked.  Topics were about our love for one another.  How we might change who we are once we are married.  But at the end it came back to her saying she was spoiled.  And how she felt she was alone once again.  It seemed that no matter what, or how, I said that she wasn't and would never be alone as long as I was there she never took that on faith and she always to returned to spoiled and alone.  I had to stop.  This conversation had to end.  Maybe it would be appropriate to begin it later, but at that time it had to end.  So I told her it was late.  That this was a safe place to camp and I would do so.  Then I asked her to join me so that I could hold her as she slept.  She came to me and hugged me, crying, and said she would like nothing better.
 
   So here we are.  Under the lean to, under the stars.  She's sleeping on the ground cloth I put down and I sit and write.  Soon I will do as I said.  I'll lay by her side and hold her.  But I too will sleep.  What will be when I awake?  Will she still be here with me?  Or not?   I pray that she is.  I told her that I would choose if I must.  And that choice would be her.  I would forego Sehky and Keela for her.  She doesn't want, in any way, for that to happen and she would harbor resentment for herself. But I would make that choice.  But ultimately it matters not.  Because in the end I want her to be forever happy.  I want her to be at forever at ease.  And I want these things for the Jillian I love.  Preferably with me.  If it's without me so be it.  As long as she is those things I shall be happy too.  If she leaves during the night without waking me and I awake here alone without her in my arms.  I'll have my answer.

*lies next to Jillian and pulls her close.  She pulls his arm tightly around her and snuggles into him and sighs a sigh of relief.  He smiles and drifts off in slumber*

[Yar Ydnar]

Resolution (?)

Jillian was there when I awoke.  Actually , she did the waking.  I never knew such soft kisses could wake me so readilly.  But they did just that.  Perhaps it was because there were so many. *sigh* Regardless I opened my eyes and hers were smiling back at me.  She was a changed person from the night before.  The tear stains were gone.  She seemed relaxed.  Even happy.  She told me she had to hurry.  Duties you know.  And with that she kissed me softly and ran off toward Dalanthar.  I don't think I said one word the entire time.  I'll see her later tonight.  Here.  By then I'll have erased these cobwebs from my mind.  
________________________________________________________________

Came back to the crossing and found Jillian, as expected, but what was not expected was that she was with Sehky and Keela.  They were cordial to one another.  Looked as if they had just returned from thinning the Trolics.  Before I had a chance to say anything Keela left, followed closely by Sehky.  Just a quick hello and goodbye was it and they were gone.  Jillian's eyes were still smiling.  A good sign right?   No harsh words.  No cold shoulder.  I had to find out why the switch had been thrown in Jillian.  Something had definitely changed.  And I had to know what.  She came to me and kised me.  I hugged her close and then asked if there was somewhere pretty we could go to talk.  She suggested a lake so I followed and she led me to a quiet little lake near North Pointe.  Very pretty and peacefull.  Yes this would do nicely.  So I just asked her.  Flat out asked her why the change.  She said the division was hurting me and so she decided to "Put on her happy face"..... For me.  She would do this for me.  I mildly objected saying that she shouldn't do this for me.  Not even us.  If it's something with which she's not comfortable, she shouldn't do it.  She put a finger to my lips to hush me and said,  "I was friends with them before you. I can be friends with them again.  Please let me do this."  I nodded okay, she smiled, and then she kissed me more passionately than ever before.  We moved closer and talked in whispers as we continued to kiss.  I don't think in the entire time were were more that a slip of paper distant from each other.  More talk, more kissing, quick heart beats.  Faster heart beats, more kissing, less talk.  Even now my heart races as I write.  No! We can wait.  And even though I would love to married today, now.  It would be rude.  And rude people we are not. Make an excuse to leave this spot quickly lest we indulge our passions.  The guard is giving us awkward glances?  That will do. Have no idea whether or not the guard even sees us.  Still it's an excuse.  Take a deep breath and draw her scent in.  It's different.  More alluring, if that can be possible, but there it is in the air around me.  Push away and make the excuse about the guard.  Kiss her gently and do what is right, not what's primal.  We shall be married soon enough.  Those passions can wait. They must wait.

[Yar Ydnar]

Soul Mother passes by:

Jillian and I were together when a messenger falcon deposited a scroll infront of us.  It was from Sehky.  He asked us to join him at the Crossroads.  We were to clear the ridge of the undead and then continue through the wolf cave atop the mountain.   The idea of dealing the final solution to the undead on the ridge positively delighted Jillian so I, or we rather, decided to honor Sehky's request.  So we journeyed to the Crossroads and met up with Sehky and Keela.  Also there was Micus.  After preparations the five of us set out to the ridge.  Jillian was spot on form.  Even now it warms me to the core.  She was laughing, dancing, and just .. I do not know.  It soars within my heart to had seen her and think her such.  It was like she had rediscovered a long lost childhood friend. Anyway.  It was, and is good even now, to think of her in that state.  

We made our way to the cave.  The wolves, as long as you stay together, pose no real problem.  It was after.  Sehky warned us to stay together and we did.  It would have made no difference.  They, ice spiders, swarmed us.  We never had a chance.  Must face the reality that there are things out here that can deal us significant harm.  Things we must plan for and execute well with the correct party.  Otherwise we end up at the bindstone like we did last night.  And even though I did not loose another strand.  I saw her.  She floated close to me as I lie there.  Wagging her boney finger at me.  Yes.  It was her.  And it was too close.

[Yar Ydnar]

Alazira:

We all had recovered from our bad exprience with the ice spiders, and when I say all I mean Jillian, Keela, and myself.  Sehky and Micus were able to escape and make it back down the mountain without further incident. We are at the Crossroads outside Dalanthar when a rather vociferous elf appeared.  Everyone, save me, knew her and except for Jillian and I were as happy as could be at her appearance.   I tired to get Keela's attention but she was so enamored with this new visitor she hardly noticed me.  Matter of fact she out right ignored me.  Mybe it was the fact that the newcomer was sitting in Sehky's lap and making cooing noises that had Keela distracted.  What ever the case I would be ignored no more so I forcefully, and rather rudely I'm ashamed to say, injected myself into the never ending ramble of words that was being considered conversation.  This, as was plainly evident, got her attention, Keela's also.   From the newcomer an icy stare, but at least she wasn't talking, and from Keela a look of bewilderment.   Sehky had a look too.  Between the new arrival ceasing her squirming in his lap and roaming her hands all throughout his body, and that Keela momentarily removed her loving attentions from him to glare at me.  He looked like a puppy who had lost his favorite toy, or toys in this case.  But I had created a momentary pause in banter so I took advantage of that pause to introduce my self.  She casually removed herself from Sehky's lap, which I thought made him almost whimper with disappointment, and turned her attention to me.  She then said something along the lines to the others, not to me, of he's dressed in blue so it figures that he's a Toranite.  What doesn't figure is that he's rude so that goes against his grain as one.  Then directed to me she said , "Okay blue boy.  I am Alazira, High Priestess of the Temple of Ilsare.  My friends call me Zira. You call me Alazira.  I don't care for Torys much.  As I was married to one for what seemed a life time.  Argos', do you know him?."  I replied that I did.  But probably not as well as I should.  She immediately came back with the story of him kicking her out and abandoning her for, at least according to her, no justifiable reason.  She also said that since I was in good company, by her standards, she would hold her tongue.  At this time Jillian excused herself as she wasn't feeling well not yet fully recovered from our trip through the bindstone.  Alazira and Keela both gave me funny looks, kind of well look who's been naughty looks, when Jillian excused herself.  I have no idea, nor am I sure I want to know, what those looks are about.  I just shook my head at Keela in confusion.  She just kept on with that look.  I thought she would never stop, and probably would not have, but Micus said that he needed to make a trip to the Frindahl Fortess and asked for our help in doing so.  We all, save Jillian, signed on to the trip.  So off we went.  I stopped in to check on my love and found her peacefully sleeping in one of the tents.  I didn't wake her.  But when I emerged there are these two again with those same looks as before.  For the life of me I cannot figure them out.  

It was evident that Alazira was extremely usefull during this trip.  Her talents are extensive and well practiced.  And with her, and us, we had no problems making it through the defenses of the fortress and gaining the prize that Micus sought.  Somewhere during that trip, and I forget when, she said I could call her Zira.  I think a rather good compliment.  We made our way out without incident and while we were headed back our trip evolved into a fashion show.  Literally, as we were walking back, Alazira would run ahead and momentarilly disappear behind a rock, a tree, or something and then reemerge wearing a completely different set of clothes.  This positively thrilled Keela. Who almost at once said she was looking for something to wear to a wedding.  So when we got to the lake outside of Dalanthar we stopped.    Micus said his farewells and the rest of us stayed for that purpose.  A fashion show.  Again the words between Alazira and Keela were flying.  They must have looked at dozens of outfits.  Where does she carry them all?  Somewhere I got confused and thought that this had progressed to them choosing Jillians gown, which they were not, and I said that Jillian already had a concept in mind and that if they wanted to help they should ask her.  At that they both stopped talking.  I was amazed they could do that so easilly, stop talking I mean. I would have thought they would have to slow down gradually or face risk of permanent injury and deformation of the face when spewing words at such a rate.  None the less they stopped.  After a brief moment Keela stated that this outfit was for her to wear.  Alazira echoed the same but she did add that she would help Jillian, if Jillian so desired.  I apologised for my error and told Keela she could wear anything she wanted. She could wear the most elegant dress, stalks of corn, or even her most daring furs.  To me it didn't matter as she would look beautifull in whatever she wore and that my main concern was that she and Sehky be at the wedding.  At that Sehky said that he would wear his kilt.  Again I stated it didn't matter.  Just as long as they were there.  It seems though that during all the passing of words and fashion changes Keela did settle on an elegant dress to wear.  And I was correct.  She looks beautiful as always.  I excused myself and was making my way back to Jillian when we found each other in Dalanthar.  She looked refreshed and ready to meet the world again.  So that's what we did.  We turned to face the world....Together.

[Yar Ydnar]

CAPTAIN JILLIAN:

I'm beaming as I write this.  Jillian has been promoted to Captain within the ranks of the Shining Hand.   I never had a doubt.  The position was open and desperately needed filled.  She was the logical choice.  But it wasn't given to her outright.  She still had to earn it.  There was a ship that washed ashore to the west of Fort Llast and it was rumored to be a meat locker,  a vessel containing undead,  We formed a group and made our way to the distant beach only to find that the ward placed around the ship had faded and undead were walking the beach.  They were easily dispatched, as were the ones on the ship.  I felt ill.  My stomach in knots.  I'm ashamed to say I vomited.  But still I resumed my duties.  Stomach pain and all.  In the hold of the ship was an egg like stone protected by a wall.  It took Richard a few times to disband the wall before we could get to the stone.  It didn't respond to spells, holy water, or anything else we could think of so Jillian, my Jillian, produced a pick and started striking the stone.  With each strike the feeling disapated in my gut.  Once I thought she was going to fall ill.  But she kept striking the stone.  Then it cracked and exploded.  I had my shield up and it took most of the pieces of stone.  Jillian had no protection save the armor she wore but as she was directly over the stone when it exploded she paid the consequence.  I'd though I lost her.  She was badly wounded.  Near death.  I potioned her as quickly as I could to bring her back from the brink.  I do believe because she took so much of the blow it saved many behind her.  Because I had my shield up it did the same for those behind me.  Alas we did have one young man succumb to the blast.  But our priest saw to it he recovered.   Now as I think of it.  We did have another go down during the fighting in the ship.  And the priest came through there as well.  It was over though.  My stomach returned to normal.  Everyone was walking out.  It was a good ending to a dangerous situation.  Upon return the Commander of the Shining Hand inducted some into the order.  Others he did not.  One being William, the lad who's parents were murdered.  So much pain there, anger as well.  But I feel he needs it to mature.  He needs to get past it in his own way in order to be sure he can control himself and thus control most situations.  Enough of that.  And Jillian.  My Jillian.  Was promoted.  I'm still beaming.