The CPU fan didn't actually go bad, I just lost the final two plastic tabs that hold the fan/heatsink onto the CPU. Annnnd, when going to purchase a new fan bracket after work (for 37 dollars *sighs*) the salesman neglected to tell me that there was supposed to be a screw kit included with the bracket. 53 minutes of backyard engineering later, it's back up and running (and the HDD light works now...w00t), hopefully this one will last me the few months it'll take to save up for a new motherboard. While I try to find someplace cheap to stock up on socket 478 fan brackets.
*Crosses fingers*
