The World of Layonara
Character Development => Development Journals and Discussion => Topic started by: Yar Ydnar on November 06, 2011, 08:28:16 AM
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(Not from in game)
Riley's Resurrection
Riley Alexander awoke, his head pounding, his ribs on fire. Behind him a familiar voice gleefully exclaimed, "See mam's, told ye ee was gonna make it.
Ee's head is too hard." Another voice. This one female. "Praise be the gods then. Nothin to do with ee's head. Ee's watched oer. Like no other I seen.
Fetch papa." Scurrying feet followed by a slamming door and a child yelling for his father fades. Riley feels no danger, no immediacy in his situation,
he feels ...... safe. Steps came closer and the female says. "Alright there Ben, hold still whilst I remove this bandage. Hmmm. Let me ave yer hand. Hold some light pressure there. I need to get some water. Ye are still bleeding. Not much. But enough to stick to the bandage." Soft footsteps away and sound of water being dipped. Soft footsteps back. "Ere let me ave at it. There tis. Close yer eyes whilst I unwrap ye." He could feel the wraps as they came off. With each one the light became brighter and brighter. Even with his eyes tightly shut. Once she finished she could see the wince in his face so she drew the door curtains closed. He felt her hands softly run over his head as if searching for ..... what he didn't know. "Yes..yes. Ye surely ave the gods oer ye. No worse for wear it seems. By all rights ye should be dead. But then ye should ave been dead when that devil horse drug ye in ere. Hold there til papa comes. Ee'll wanna take ee's own look. Keep yer eyes shut. Be dark soon enough. Won't hurt as much when ye open em."
Not long until he heard the child yelling for papa to hurry. That Ben was awake. She called him Ben too. Why? A door opening. Heavier footsteps
coming. "Well there. Ye finally came round. Mam's an me had our doubts." The child inserted "Not me. No.. no.. Not me. I knew ye be round. Didn't
I papa?" "Yes Zachary. Ye naer had doubts. Well Ben. Can ye open them eyes? Slowly now. Test em first." Riley slowly opened one eye. Then the other. It was dark outside. The only light was that of a candle and the soft glow of fireplace embers. He was in a small abode with thatched walls and roof with an earthen floor. Directly across from him was the only door. To his right was a vaguely familiar large stone structure which housed a large fireplace with what seemed to an equally large cooking pot. And what was in the pot was calling to him. Papa saw the look in the eyes and said, "Mams, Ben's back fer sure. An I think ee's ready to sup." Mams returns the remark with a smile that shows relief, "When was ee naer ready to sup. Ee eats all durin the wakin hours. Just appens I got plenty. Just keep em sittin. Ee looks unsteady still." Riley had no idea what came from the pot. He didn't care. He ate and drank his fill. Then a wave of exhaustion fell upon him. He fell asleep in the chair.
Upon awaking the next morning he felt refreshed. Rubbed his eyes and tried to sit up in the cot. Whoa. Not so fast. Still not all there. Take it slow.
"Mams. Ee's awake." Zachary called out. Seems as if the child was his appointed herald. "I can see son. Go feed the chickens so they'll lay. Ben will be fine without ye." "Ahhh mams." "Don't dally boy. Get." A smile came to Riley's face as he watched the young lad hang his head and stomp out the door. He looked across at the fireplace and for the first time started to take in his surroundings. The night's sleep didn't change the abode. Still thatch construction with a large stone fireplace that made up one complete wall. Mams is a short woman. Not thin, but not large. He could see that she was a life hardened no nonsense woman. Kind. But firm. Zachary was a gangly youth, figured 12 or 13, with a smile that showed he was carefree. Doesn't recall much about papa. Oh well. Later. Mams said "Ben, papa found the crutch ye used afore. Said ye might want it. There. -points- The other side of yer cot. But afore ye try it ave some birch tea to clear yer head." Again she called him Ben. This time it wouldn't go unchallenged. After asking why she called him so mams silently gasped and carefully put the tea in Riley's hand and quickly walked out the door.
She was right. The strong tea worked wonders. With every sip the cobwebs cleared from his mind. Soon he hears urgent conversation outside.
Papa, "I told ye that ee might come full round Sara. That day may be nigh." So her name is Sara. Or do I call her mams?
Sara, "It worries me Caleb. Remember when ee was drug in ere. All dressed in armor. It worries me cause I do not know of what ee's truly capable. I do know ee's as strong as our oxen and as elusive as the
wind. It just scares me as to the true nature of em."
Papa, "Sara, it's been three years or more since he came to us and in all that time ee's naer showed any sign different than being who we came to call family. I'll think no different of em n...."
Caleb stopped as he saw Riley stoop to hobble through the door. Caleb.
A round man of average height. His hands calloused from work. A crooked grin. Confident in his opinion and sure in his work. Not human. Half elf was his guess. Yes. Definitely half elf.
Papa, "Well there. Seems that we can't call ye Ben anymore. Not proper now that ye ave come round. So then. What do we call ye."
Riley, "Riley.....Riley Alexander.... But by the sound of the conversation it would seem that I am more in your debt than I could ever repay....And then some. You can still call me Ben. I'll answer. No need to confuse the lad."
It was weeks before Riley regained his strength and coordination. In that time Caleb and Sara told him of the day he arrived. How he was caught in the stirrup of his saddle being dragged about lifeless. His head packed with mud and grass. A fortunate thing as it stopped the bleeding. At first they thought he was dead. And if it weren't for his horse, Pearl, trotting into the oxen corral he might very well be. Caleb and Sara tried for a full day to get him untangled but Pearl would have nothing of it. Finally Sara came up with the idea of feeding Pearl a mild drug she remembered her father using to subdue problem horses while he worked as a smithy. It worked and they pulled Riley from the pen. Armor and all. They took his armor, weapons, and all other possessions and hid them away. Now returned. After many weeks of care by Sara Riley eventually, seemingly, came to his senses but was devoid of all memories. No knowledge of his past or name. As such he became Ben because Zachary said the newcomer, "Been sleepin.", "Been ere forever.", or "Just been in the way." So Ben it became. Caleb and Sara figured one name was as good as the other. Riley knew no different so Ben it stayed. He remained with the family and helped with the farming. Caleb used to get a belly laugh at first because it was plain to see that Ben knew little, if anything, about farming. But Ben was exceptionally smart and good with his hands. The first year he learned. The second year he hauled stones for weeks. Caleb asked what was afoot but Ben kept to himself. Ben knew that the family had to travel to pay respects to a passing family member and would be gone for a few weeks. Ben stayed and kept up the farm. Tore down a thatch wall. Mixed up motor and reconstructed the wall using those many stones. The family returned to a large fireplace rather than a small fire pit in the center of the home. A welcome addition to be sure. Sara was positively giddy.
Caleb always said that Ben "Might come round". They didn't know when, or if, that day would ever happen. Seemed for the longest that it never would. Then near tragedy when Ben fell through the barn roof. Caleb told him he was too heavy. Told him many times. But Ben had been up there often repairing the thatch. He thought this time would be no different. Almost at the top of the pitch the roof completely gave way. Ben plummeted to the floor below striking his head on a fence railing and landing length wise across the anvil. Explains the smarting ribs. He was unconscious for three days. And woke up to a new reality.
Resurrection.
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Been traveling days since I left the farm. The countryside, I guess is familiar. But then much of it here looks the same as somewhere else. Still I must be on the right path. People seem to know my name. Saw someone named Ketlebjorn Svaldi, A powerful dwarf who nearly talked my ear off about people I know I should know. All I could really do was smile and agree.... A lot. Quite a few "I don't know's and I can't remembers" came from me as well. But with all the recognition from the locals I feel I'm on the right path. Aren't I?
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After four days of travel it feels as if I have returned home. Or....At least I think so. Seems I remember this place called Hlint being more of a bustling place. Full of people, shops, and a crafting hall. Hmm. Guess I could be in error. After all it's all a bit sketchy in my mind. Maybe it was somewhere else.
The temple in Fort Llast I remember well. Everything is just as it should be there. Just as I recall. Makes me even more unsure about Hlint.
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I have been able to recall certain people and places with the help of Keela and Sehky. Ilsarians. I know it's a taboo area in my training but something tells me in my heart that these two are good for me. They are a little to ... let's say .. cozy in public for my liking but still there is something about them I do like. Can't figure it out... yet.
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I met a vision today. Her name is Jillian Stuart. I had known her for all of five seconds and I knew I wanted to spend all of my days with her. No. That's selfish. I wish for her to be happy in all aspects of her life with or, Toran please do not let it be so, without me. She's also a follower of Toran and member of The Shining Hand. A Beacon, I believe, is her stature in the order. I want to spend more time with her...without her sensing that my goal is to spirit her heart away. That will be difficult as she's a well trained paladin as well as undead hunter. Her senses are sharp and I must confess when I'm with her, unless it's girding for battle, my senses are muted.
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During my excursions in the Silkwood Caverns, where I have been keeping the spider population down, I encountered a Dark Elven Archer. Most strange. I didn't proceed further into the cavern. Thought it best to make a report to the authorities.
__________________
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I discovered why I like Keela and Sehky so much. I was gathering some things I'd left and by chance I came across a diary penned by Silool Baerath. It was diary about me. About the trials in my life that have led to who I am today.
As it is written I was discovered by a group of adventurers who happened across a band of maurading Ogres which had just attacked our house. Made me an orphan and left me for dead in the rubble they were setting ablaze. This was an extensive group of seven individuals working as one. They were Rodlin Serim, Emerald Skye, Esimon Clearpeak, Kavil Yodin, Dorax Windsmith, Rawkwin Valerius, and Yar Ydnar.
All of these people had a profound effect upon my life. Emerald, Yar, and Dorax taught me the art of the blade along with their own take on life. Emerald taught me humility, Dorax strength, and Yar honor. Rodlin insisted that I respect the tenents of nature. He also had a large bear I rode when he wasn't looking. Esimon, Kavil, and Rawkwin tried to teach me the ways of the weave. But I was not gifted in that way so they settled for me to understand the arts rather than practice them.
But these seven were, after all, adventurers and there were long periods of time when they were not to be found. So the temple priests hired someone who would be about to see to my needs and education in matters not related to the temple. They contracted with Silool Baerath to be my surrogate mother. And she kept this...this wonderful diary.
As I kept reading I came across a passage detailing when the group came back... minus one. Yar had given his last covering the retreat of the others from an onslaught from a large hoard of Bugbears. He rests with the mistress of souls never to return. Silool was worried at how I would take the news. She was prepared to comfort me. To be there for me. But I told not to feel remorse for Yar. He died the nobelests of deaths. His death allowed his friends to live. No. I shed no tears for Yar.
I also came upon a short verse outlining that this work of words was to be mine one day. So that I could keep the memories fresh. Keep them ever living.
Then the diary ended. No indication that it was to do so. It just ended.
Being curious I asked the temple librarian if he knew where I might find Silool. I had many questions to ask. Maybe she could help fill in the gaps in my memory. Yes. She was the perfect choice. Regretably he informed me that she died during the blood wars. I was away. Youthfull exhuberence. A new paladin in training when a Blood raiding party fell upon the fort. She died trying to protect a young child. Had I been there it might have been different. Possibly?
So Silool never got to hear about Kavil's heroic feats that were so pivotal to the outcome of the final battle against Blood and his forces. She never heard about the others and how they heroically moved to another existence or simply retired.
I thanked the librarian and set out to find someplace of beauty to reread the diary and as I did I found I remembered more and more. I remember her lessons of life. I remember her patience and persistance to instill into me the very best qualities of those seven. I remember her quietly telling me that one day love would find me. Not me finding love. That feelings were not to be hidden but explored. Yes. I remember all those things and more. All because of Silool. Silool the Ilsarian. That is why I have a place in my heart for Keela and Sehky.
I held the diary to my breast for a long time. To think she could love me that much to put it all down. For me she did this. Yes. I held the diary to my breast for a long time. For almost as long as I wept.
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Came upon a young bard today named Melodious Widgeweaver who was being attacked by bone bats near the campfire in the Glade. She was handling heself quite well but it soon became apparent that these bats were not going to stop coming so I helped her. Those dastardly things came in three more waves after that. I've heard rumors of the increased instances of the undead throughout the land but this is the first I've encountered them away from any crypt. Very curious indeed.
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I was with Jillian again today. There were others in our party but my focus is with her. I think she's taken a liking to me. She whispers to me. Actually whispers words that are meant only for my ears. The words are not...romantic in nature .... but they are personal. And they are for me. I have to wonder why she has had such trouble with men. Or at least she claims to have rotten luck with them. Case in point she whispered to me that a member of our party, Daniel, out right told her that she was the second best female he's ever seen. What a dolt I thought and I must have said it under my breath because she chuckled at the remark. I figured the dice had been rolled so I whispered back his loss is my gain. I thought I saw a faint smile at that. Or was I imagining things? The rest of the trip was uneventful except for when I tripped and fell into her after we exited the caves and knocked her down. By Toran it was an accident. I would never be so blatant to try such a school boy prank. But I'm sure everyone in attendance thought it was just that. A boyish prank. I could not say I was sorry enough times. I must have turned a dozen shades of red. I fell I was positively glowing with embarassment. As I helped her up I saw in her eyes that she was .... flattered I guess is the word.... that someone would go to such lengths to make an impression on her. Is that good? I don't know but I must be carefull never to do it again. She is worthy of so much more than a boyish prank. Even if it was an honest to goodness accident.
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Again the Dark Elves in the Silkwood caverns! I had just made it to the final set of chambers and had just set myself to pray and heal ere continuing when a Dark Warrior emerged from the small passage between the levels. He past me by and stopped in his tracks. No attempt at violence he just stood there. I hailed him twice with out reply. And when he left he calmly walked away. Almost as if inviting me to join him. It was an invitation I declined and hastened to return to the surface. I surmize that my leaving was objected to because I was beset upon by three warriors and a pet hunter spider on the way out. Luckily I was fully prepared with prayer and dispatched them all. But I cannot help but wonder if it was, or is, a trap they have prepared in the lower caverns. I must make a report so everyone knows.
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I asked Jillian today if it was okay that we got to know each other ... socially.. I mean I wanted to get to know her better... socially. Properly.
I don't know what I'm saying. I'm not sure she knows what I'm saying either. She didn't look put off. Maybe a bit confused by the words I used. But in the end we both agreed to see each other. But would have to wait until after her Shinning Hand mission. I don't want her distracted. So we will wait until that is over.
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Accompanied Jillian on her Shining Hand mission. Quite interesting. She is very good at what she does. No scratch that. She's superb at what she does. Not sure if I could do it. And I'm having doubts about if I should go on future missions with her. I finished this one because I promised her I would be there. But even though I do not believe in my heart that my presence would prevent her from making good decisions. Seeing her in such danger and loving it makes me think I couldn't make good decisions. And I'm fearfull that my bad action, or inaction, could lead to her undoing. For still my senses seem muted while in her presence.
This was brought to the my attention while I was guarding an Acolyte that practiced the arts of necromancy and ... Blood Magic... The idea that some fool could still be dabbling in blood magic makes my blood boil. But in such a case I would do the proper thing. Which would be keeping calm foremost and not engaging the prisoner in verbal sparing. There are others far more suited than I for such matters. But I failed in that regard. I failed in front of her. When that.. creature, even now it makes me frantic, threatened to use Jillian as a lustful toy and force me to watch... even now.. I lost my temper and threatened to part his head from the rest of his body. I don't do such things, Especially when those who are making such statements are securely bound and lying at my feet. But in this case I would have willingly done just that. But I did not and Beacon Jared took the Acolyte of to face truth. He was to return but did not so we, Jillian, Richard Watchman , and myself set out to find them along the trail. While doing so we were beset upon by numerous waves of undead. Easy enough to dispatch but in following from where they came we found scenes of a recent battle. Swords strewn about, and blood. Lot's of blood and a blood trail. These undead do not cover thier tracks well at all.
The blood trail led to a large rock covering an opening in the hill side. Jillian and I together could barely budge it but Richard saved the day with a spell that forced to rock to one side just enough for us to squeeze through. I counseled for rest but Jillian wanted to press on. So we did. We came upon a large unoccupied chamber that had one hallway leading away. In that hallway were monk like desciples of the blood order in residence. Again they were easy enough to dispatch but after that I felt drained and required rest. Jillian seemed unaffected. Her spirit thrives on the demise of the undead and because of the previous battles she was still ready to proceed. But she saw that I was in need so she relented and we retreated to the outside and there I rested. Not sure if Jillain and Richard did. Upon reentry to the chamber we again found the hallway guarded and once again we dispatched the guards without problem. From room to room we searched and we found that same Acolyte prancing about in a room accompanied by four desciples. The center of the room had a portal. To where we do not know. Short, pointless, conversation ensued and Jillian sprang to the attack after the beast ordered his desciples to kill us. She was out for him while Richard and I were to handle the others. Not enirely successful. Richard ran for his life and kept one of them occupied in the chase and three came to my blade. Jillian thought I was in danger so she broke off the attack ane came to assist me. In doing so it gave the beast the opportunity to rush to the portal and disappear. Was that a judgement made by her because of her feelings toward me? I'll never know because I'll never ask. I do not ever want her to second guess her judgement in such matters and such a question, MAY, may mind you, cause such a thing to happen.
We inspected the rest of the chambers and found Captain Richards, Beacon Jared and four other Shinning Hand members. The Captain was displayed upon a cross, obviously tortured and long dead. Jared was at deaths door as he lie on the floor and the others were being held in cages. While Jillian and I attended to Jared Richard managed to unlock the cages to free the others. I gave each a ration of food and water. Jillian reached into her pack and started to pass out longswords. I hadn't noticed that she had collected them at the battle scene. Thankfully they were not required as the trip out of the chambers and back to Mariners Hold was uneventful. I've heard rumors that Jillian may be promoted to fill the vacant Captains position. I can't help but wonder if my insistence on resting was the time required to do the job on the Captain. I'll never know. My examination of his wounds revealed they were old, not fresh. But I shall never know.
Yes. I need to think very hard before accompanying her on future missions. Loath as I am to make such a statement I feel it may be the best course of action for her. I don't know. Toran help me.
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Sehky gave me an ornate ring to give to Jillian. It was one she had purchased through the guild and since I would probably see her first I could pass it on. So I placed it into the bank for safe keeping and I did see her a short time later. I asked her to join me in the bank and, just perhaps, I made too much of a fuss during the presentation of the ring. My intent was to just give her the ring. That was all. She knew that, at least I thought she did, it was the ring she purchased. But when I gave it to her she asked me, ohh something about what it symbolized to me and to us. Rather than answer in a completely sane way. I had to intimate that if I had my way it would be a ring securing our lives together. That I would intend it to be an engagement ring. RIGHT THERE IN THE BANK!! I did this. Then I compounded the issue by asking her to marry me. RIGHT THERE IN THE BANK! What the blazes am I doing? It would seem that at every turn I'm clumsily driving her away when I should be patiently stealing her heart. Fortuneately one much wiser that I came to my aide. And that one much wiser is Jillian. She saved me inspite of myself. So rather than a massive disaster, it turned out to be a minor bump in the road. All thanks to Jillian. I have said that my senses are muted while in her presence but in this case they had left me completely. Thank you M'lady for saving me from myself.
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Things have been going well with Jillian. At least I have not approached the shear stupidity I had in the bank. We occasionally hold hands. She's kissed me on the cheek. Once now. Maybe twice. My approach toward her in the presence of company has always been proper in all respects. Well not really. There are times that I have had , purposefull, body contact as I pass by. Contact such as, softly brushing against her forearm and such. Once I went so far as to kiss her hand in public. Truth be told in private it's not much different. After all we are just starting. But something is missing, I know not what it might be. Yes. Something is definitely missing.
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She. She said yes. I can hardley believe it. Maybe it was the circumstance of us having a bad experience together that resulted in a trip to the bindstone. Maybe it was just the setting. I can say it WASN'T THE BANK. It was on a small hill just outside Center. Very peaceful. We were just talking and somehow the conversation came full circle to how it WASN'T THE BANK. There was a slight pause and I just asked her. I can't remember the words. They just came out. At first I thought I had done it again and hoped that Jillian's good sense would save me again. But... She smiled , confidently, and said yes.
You could have knocked me over with a feather. Honestly I do believe you still can.
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Jillian asked me if it were fine with me that, after we are married, we could live in the house she lives in now. I told her yes. And she was so happy. She has many ties to that place. The Commander, the students, and I'm sure there are other attachments. She took me there after a training session with two of her wards. She is obviously proud of what that house has become. And I do believe prouder yet of what it represents. But as she was showing me around her private quarters I became uncomfortable. No idea why. All she had showed me was the pantry, the storage area and the common room. I asked her, no... I told her that I needed to leave. That it wasn't proper for me to be there. She reluctantly stopped her tour and asked me two simple, yet telling questions. Why is it that we can sleep side by side in the field and I feel no breach of decorum? But when she shows her private quarters, which hadn't included the sleeping quarters, I feel compelled to leave because of that same decorum? I ... I had, and have, no answer. She deserves an answer. Yet I have none.
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The events from earlier in the day weigh heavily upon me. It's obvious she was, and is still, upset about my actions in her house. And I can't blame her. After reflection I have come to the inescapable conclusion that I am a fool. Only this time I will have to be my own savior. Jillian can't do it. She's probably tired of doing it. It falls upon me alone to set this right.
We were both in Center at the Craft Hall. I was turing iron into spikes and she was in the back doing... Who knows what? Any way I had fininshed the iron and remembered that she also had some in her pack so I went to retrieve it. And I found them. Jillian and Keela. Jillian was modeling a dress while Keela worked on the fit. It was... well I don't know. To see her adorned as such, not in armor or in her armor padding. I've seen her in a very nice dress before. But this was ... alluring? I don't know. All I know is that I still have to force my eyes together to close them because they were opened so wide when I saw her.
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I did it. I finally...and with passion, kissed the woman I love. Ohh. Not to say that it all went well. At first I was digging my own personal hole deeper. We were gathered to escort two others into Haven mines and suddenly I felt the need to talk to her. In private. She obliged and the next thing I know is that I'm holding her whispering to her that I wanted to kiss her and asking permission to do so. How utterly embarassing. Once again I choose the inappropriate time. And to hide away at the back of a house. Please. I guess the good things I did were tell her my fears and then made a promise. I was afraid I was pushing her away because of my misplaced need to be that proper knight at all times. It was foolish and I would play that fool no more. That behavior has it's place but when are alone I have to be the man she needs me to be. Not the knight. The promise was to kiss her for the first time in a setting that was romantic. And that time would be soon. So... After we returned successfully from the mines I excused myself and told her I would be awaiting her near the pool atop the rise in Haven. There I chanced upon a rose and I picked it and waited. When her business was completed she joined me and I gave her the rose. Took her into my arms and kissed her. Passionately. At that instant I knew we would be okay. I felt the tension within her melt away. And I told her once again that I was not afraid to be the man she needed me to be. Why did I wait so long? I think I said in a earlier entry that something was missing. Well no more.
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(not in game)
We made the trip to Huangjin to tell her parents. It was my decision and I wouldn't take no for an answer. So away we went. I was a wreck on the ship. Can't say I was nervous. Confused is more like it. Kept going over my talk with her father. But nothing seemed to work. Jillian tried to settle me but I was beyond hope. So after sundown she retired to her quarters and left me to my own. I talked to myself, to the sailors on watch and even the passing seagulls but nothing. Then the ship's Captain came to me and gave me some advice. Quit thinking about it. He was right. It seems that during the course of the night I told anyone who would listen, and even those who would not, about Jillian. The Captain knew that if I could be that at ease with complete strangers with regard to my feelings for her, then I certainly could with the family that I was sure to accept me. He was right. I was thinking too much.
Wow!! Everyone was at Jillians parents house. It would seem that that was the day of the unveiling of Jillians newest niece. Her baby sister had recently given birth and today the baby was to be introduced to the rest of the family.
Jillian's mom and other sister were busy decorating the room for the arrival and positively erupted with joy when she saw us. As usual she was a flurry of questions and comments and eventually sent me out back to where the men had gathered while Jillian stayed there to help decorate.
While out back the conversation came round to how lucky it was that Jillian had gotten the word about the day's events. Her father quickly stated that no word was sent as he never knew where she might be. So he asked me why, or how, it was that we happened to be there on that day. I told him that indeed it was a happy coincidence that we were there and that I was there for another purpose. Caleb, I believe, the new father, interupted and said that it was as plain as the nose on my face. I was there to ask for permission to marry Jillian. Her father asked me if that was true. I said yes and it was then that time seemed to halt. The very air itself refused to move. He steped up to me and almost demanded I continue on and ask. I must have looked past him at the others and he immediately said that they were familly and to carry on. I did just that. I gathered myself and told him of my feelings for Jillian and her feelings for me. That I'd already asked her and she had said yes. That being the case I couldn't go on with the marriage until her family had been properly informed and asked. Again after, seemingly, an eternity he practically jumped for joy. I could breath again. But he did insist that we toast the event with this ... brew.... he called Liquid Ambrosia. Burns going down. But the aroma and the enticement to my senses after the burn was worth the pain. What pain? I asked. She said yes. And now they have as well. I'm in bliss. What is this pain?
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Been awhile since my last entry and rather than recount all that has happened I'll just quickly go through some of the highlights But once that has been done, a tragedy today. One that involves death and the future of two young students of Jillian that I must record in full.
First the summary - Jillian and I are blessed to be together. Although our alone time is fleeting I have determined that any time with her is fullfilling. We have always known that we work well together but now that we are together more we find that we anticipate each others actions and can act to support each other without prompting. There is one small thing I wish she would do for me however. Learn to D..U..C..K. . Especially when fighting the undead. She is so engaged that she relishes the strikes she receives from them. She seems to gain power from it. But I really wish she could learn to avoid some of those. Maybe it's her armor. It's Drugar. Very good armor. But it has no ability to absorb some of the taken blow. I shall get her some addy and see if that helps. If not she still has the other. As to our time together, it's rarely alone time. Not that I need alone time to bask in her presence. But it would be nice to sit and talk about.... well just talk. Her time and my time is in such high demand from others. Ha! I never knew I could be that popular. Come to think of it I wasn't until I met her. Anyway. We are the type that can't say no to others. It is said that we reap what we sow. If that's true then my crop is abundant.
Now to the events of the day. One of Jillian's students, William, parents and siblings, save one, were murdered today in Fort Llast. Sir Lance gathered a quick party together and we met at the house where the deed took place. The father was downstairs. Nearly beheaded. Blood was everywhere. I went upstairs to find the mother and three children dead. Only one the Soul Mother had yet to take, John, so he was resurected. I also discovered William and Mari in the mothers room. I remember William from a training session that Jillian invited me to in the Mistone Caves. There I witnesed watched has he made his way through training. Now I meet him there, in his mothers room, blood everywhere. I examined her and checked the severity of her wounds. She had been .... even now it pains me... personally brutilized and finally her throat slit. I tried to raise her with a scroll but to no avail. I went down to report to Sir Lance my findings with the two youngsters in tow. We had to remove them from the house. So much blood. So much pain.
Outside Lance arranged for the bodies to be cared for and talked to William and Mari. I had found out later that William and Mari had discovered the carnage and made the initial report. I asked Juanita and the Lieutenant if they had seen, or heard, anything out of the ordinary. They hadn't. It was then that WIlliam said he had a bad feeling about some people that his father had hired to do some work about the house. Nothing specific. Just a feeling. Then Micus came up with a blood trail and he and Lance tracked it outside the Fort to an encampment filled with bandits and other nefarious persons. One was sporting fresh wounds. Sir Lance was challenged by a hafling. Lance was cordial, non threatening and open in his conversations with the hafling. Yet the hafling was rude and utterly obnoxious towards Lance. I stepped down to join Lance and stated that I saw that one of the men in the camp was wounded and perhaps we could help. By then the hafling had, what he'd thought, was sufficient back up and ordered us away again. I flatly stated that not until I examined the wounded man. It was then that the fools attacked. Wasn't but a moment and they were strewn about the ground dead. Foolish waste of life. They would have lived had they not attacked. To be sure they would have been taken into custody. Yet they would have lived that day.
That business done we put our weapons away and approached two men by the tents. As we approached I sensed William fighting the urge to take a life. His inner battle was immense. I focused on him as well as the task at hand. Sir Lance asked a few questions regarding their presence and purpose. One man, who I assumed to be the leader, said they were there to hunt deer. But he was the same man who said, after we dispatched his henchmen, that he would now have to hire another crew. You don't hire thieves and highwaymen to hunt deer. You hire hunters. And supposedly the wound the other man was sporting was from a deer. After Lance had some time to ask a few questions we were again attacked. Seems that some were left hiding in the tents. As we were unarmed, or so they thought, they asumed they had the upper hand. What they failed to realize is that Lance and I are never unarmed. Even when sporting no weapon in hand. As such these few foolish persons died needlessly. Still this left the two men we had been talking to unmoved. It was then that I felt Williams rage and his battle to subdue it almost get the better of him. He had controlled it that time. But what about the next. I was not about to let it get to the next time. So I told Lance that I grew weary of this and swiftly put the wounded man on his back, ripped off his boot and tossed it to a member of our party to check it for blood and to see if it fit the size of the track we'd been following. When I moved into action it took everyone by surprize. I should say everyone, except for Lance. I think he knew what I was going to do before I knew. The instant I moved he moved and the leader had no chance. Lance had him trust up in no time. All the man could do was curse and spit. Both tried to present blades against us but they were of no concern and easily negated. Anyway, while I had this... vermin... on his back I had the opportunity to examine his wounds closely. Deer wounds my eye. These wounds were caused by a small blade of some sort. A paring knife or possibly a standard table knife. The man swore at me and spat in my face a couple of times. Even had the fortitude to threaten me. Told me he would remember me. At that I laughed and told him to take a good look at me. That I was not hard to find. But also to be warned. That those who have came looking for me under such circumstances never came looking again. All this time I'd been focusing on young William and I sensed that his anger, although not gone, had reduced from a boil to a simmer. Lance instructed me to make both men ready for transport so I trust up the wounded man and placed both of them into a cart and hooked up the oxen. Mari had been searching the tents and found a bag containing a significant amount of true within as well as some bloody knives. We took the men back to Fort Llast and turned them over to the authorites no worse for wear.
But that was not it. William had said something about a new construction site and that his father had issues. What kind of issues we don't know. Yet we went to investigate. A cursory investigation led us to a weapons shop near the site. Inside was the owner and a guard. Very rare to see a guard as it didn't look like they did brisk, daytime, business. I engaged the owner in conversation as to whether he had.. exoctic's, that might be for sale. He said no but that he could get some. Just needed to know what type. I then asked about the guard and he gave some answer relating to weapons and security. It was then that Mari called my attention to a long sword. While looking at it the owner exclaimed he did, infact, have an exotic weapon out back. I asked him to bring it here... in front... so that I could look at it. He disappeared through the door and we heard him, trying, to ride away. I say trying, because Lance, once again had anticipated this and had stopped him before he had gotten far. Had him off his horse and face down in the road. My what instincts Lance has. We got him up to his knees facing Lance and then it happened. He admitted to everything. Was going on and on about how he had killed Williams father. It was then that I sensed the boil again so I quietly moved between William and him. He was about to say something else when I put my boot against his chest and shoved him over onto his back. I felt William move. But he regained control. Still the fool would not shut up. Then he said it. He asked William if he wanted to know what his mother had said before he killed her. This I would not allow. William's rage was so intense that I'm amazed he reatained any control at all. Yet I could not let it go further. So I came down on the mans chest with all my weight and force behind one knee. He gasped and passed out but for good measure I stuffed a rag in his mouth and secured it firmly with another tied around his head. Almost immediately I felt the rage within William turn into surprize, and then relief. We loaded up the man on his horse and took him into Fort Llast to the authorities. Seems that there was a weapons theft ring working in the shop we had visited. His stock was actually stolen. Any special orders were stolen items as well. It appears that Williams father got wind of this and was going to inform the authorites. They killed him before he could.
All through this I had been focussing on William, but once we were back into the Fort I noticed that I was getting ... awkward glances from Mari. I hope she thinks this is not something I do as a matter of routine. Normally I would take the verbal abuses from men such as these as they really mean nothing to me. But in this case William needed something to break the rage within him. I did these things to do that . To confront him by confronting his mental state through impersonal action. In this case those actions taken against those that did this vicious crime against his family. In the end justice was served by those assigned by society and not at the point of my, or William's, sword I hope she sees the true intent in my actions.
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Dissention in the desert:
I really don't know how to start this. So many people. So many parts. It should have a beginning but I don't have a clue in my muddled mind on where that should be. *sighs* I'll just start writing and let come what may. I guess the big picture first. We, Sehky, Keela, Gel, and I, discovered some strange artifacts in the desert and soon after a significant increase in the undead throughout the area. Come to think of it there has been an increase in reports of undead throughout the realm. Anyway we came to find two items in the desert. I took a whip from a fallen mummy. Not sure where Gel found the sensor. Soon after finding these artifacts we were visited by a talking bone bat who said his master was an all powerfull lich. One that controlled the undead. And when I say controlled I mean he reigned them in and wouldn't let them wander the land. Sounds like very strange behavior for a lich. Anyway this bat creature said that his master kept the undead from wandering through the use of a whip, which I still have, and a book. Which we didn't have. Sehky asked the creature about this book and the bat said something regarding grave robbers and then something about a Dark Elf Mistress and a half man with a tattoo on his face. That's all he knew, or claimed to know. If we found them we would find the book. Stood to reason that these robbers would have left the desert and since the tent village nearby was a Hafling settlement we decided to go there first. On the way out of the desert we discovered the body of a Dark Elf Mistress. She had been shot with powerfull shock arrows. The bone bat was fluttering overhead yelling out she's the one, she's the one. Seems we were now just looking for a tattooed hafling.
Upon entering the village there was a commotion near the pawners tent. Seems that this "tattooed Hafling" named Bram was vomiting asps. Literally puking up snakes. Seems this book is cursed. Well always being the profitier Bram was more worried about how much gold he would get for this book than disgorging a belly full of snakes in his bed while he slept. Eventually we came to an agreement whereby I would give him some fish and Gel would remove the curse for the book. He'd had enough of the asps by that time and was famished so he readilly took the deal. He gave the book to Sehky. Now we had all the pieces to give the lich. We had yet to decide if we would actually give them to him. The journey must be made first. Then we would decide.
We gathered a group of talented individuals well versed in adventuring. Casters, singers, fighters. We had all types and manor of persons. I'd sent word to Jillian to hurry and join us. But when we started out she had yet to arrive. She did arrive shortley after we entered the desert and was delayed by a flying, I guess lion, with riddles. I left the riddle telling to others whether or not it was important to us I know not. I was making my way back to Jillian as I felt her presence. And I was not going to let her wander the landscape alone. Once the riddling was done we proceeded and along the way we encountered the usual dangers the desert presents and the unusual. Portals everywhere were opening and fire creatures pouring through. We dispatched those that came and closed each portal in turn. It seemed that round every corner there were mummies. This continued until we came to a citadel, of sorts, where the writings on the walls indicated that inside was a mummified immortal king. This is where Jillian was in her element. She knew everything about the king and all required to put him to rest. We needed his organs to place back into his body. Once that was done he would be mortal again and could be dispatched to the next plane of existence. Where these items we carried his organs? Seemed unlikely. While the group was contemplating whether or not the whip, book, and sensor cold be the kings organs William went into a deep trance and saw a possible horrendous future. One that had an immense portal opening and thousands upon thousands fire creatures passing through to claim a new world. He also said that time was a commodity we did not have. We had to move and move now lest we miss the opportunity outright stop this invasion. So we entered the citadel and again at every turn there were mummies and constructs. We discovered three alters. The first was sacrificial in nature. While inspecting it a vampire materialized and was immediately struck down. It carried on it's person one of the canopic jars containing a portion of the mummified king's organs. But where to next? The only exit was the entrance so we set about looking for some secret passage or door. While doing so we were attached by a small squad of Dark Elves. This lends more weight to the possibility of Dark Elves being at the heart of the matter. That being said we did not encounter any more. Meanwhile one of our party discovered a false wall, of sorts, and Jillian and I produced our picks and commenced picking our way through. It didn't take long and we had made an opening large enough for entry. There we found the second alter. The inscription indicated that an offering of, the best, gems would please the watchers. So looking about we could not help but notice that there were four mithril statues, one on each corner, looking to the alter in the center of the room. Lady Breanna had some fine diamonds so we placed one in each of the statues hands and the room slightly shook and the the alter moved aside revealing another canopic jar and other items. The voices bellowed from the statues that the offering was accepted and that all the items were for the taking. Jillian took the jar. Not sure who took the rest. It was then that a portal opened. Was this the way forward? I suggested that we enter but others said we should ascertain it's purpose first. William muttered something about hesitation and loosing and stepped through to the astonishment of many. I followed close behind. The others followed in kind. Some not liking the idea but yet they came through. Here was an alter and a sarcophagus. There was a noise coming from inside the sarcophagus like someone, or something, scratching to get out. We were leary of what was inside but we were there to release the king and if necessary make him mortal to kill him. So we did. At first we were ready to attack. Which would have been foolish because he is immortal and to do so would have been the death of all of us. He raved on and on about the curse of immortality and how he wanted it to end. But he needed his organs. All we had was his brain and spleen. We didn't have his heart. His heart was being held by another. This ... being... was the cause of all the recent undead in the desert and was amassing an unprecidented army of fire beings to invade. We needed a champion. Someone to face this thing in mortal combat. If that champion won then he, or she, would take the heart and allow the king to finally die. But more importantly stop the invasion and the harness the undead. It had to be me. Not that I'm a champion, but, it had to be me. All of the party girded me for battle. The king himself gave me aid in the form of the power of ice for my blade. When it was time and I could not be more ready he sent me on my way. The others came too. But could only watch. Any aid on their part during the battle would have voided the contract and doomed us. I had to defeat this creature. But I wasn't alone. I had the blessings of many, the power of Toran, and most importantly the love of Jillian. Yes I was ready. He appeared. Arrogant. Cocky. He asked me if I as ready to defend a world. I asked him if he was ready to loose one. With that he launched himself at me and a flurry of blows ensued. He was fast but my shield was equal to the task. My blade found the mark over and over again. He healed and I healed. The flurry continued but then I heard, and felt, him cry in pain. Not long after I struck the final blow and vanquished him forever. The instant he died the floating rock we fought upon began to fall. Molten balls of fire falling everywhere. I quickly picked up the jar containing the heart and we all were transported back to the kings chamber. Everyone was elated. I was, and still am, exhausted. So the final piece was in hand. I placed the jar before the king and true to his word and wishes he inserted all the organs and faded to dust. He is no more. But before he went he set in motion that we all be transported to Center. So he died and poof! We are now here. Just as if it were a dream.. A dream I'll not look forward to again.
That is the story in a nutshell. To be sure there are more details that can be, and probably should be, included. But those details do not interest me. My dilema is .... is the conduct of myself and the three people I hold nearest my heart. Jillian, whom I shall always love. No matter the circumstance. Sehky. My love for him as a brother is without question. I shall always standby him as I value his judgement and experience. And then there is Keela. The little sister I never had. Her devotion to Sehky and her ability bring people together is an art. One that I admire. I know that Keela has years of lifes experience over me. And that she will walk her path long after I'm gone from a ripe old age. But she is my little sister. And I love her as such.
To see all three engaged in turmoil against one another. Words spoken that may never be recalled. May never be forgotten. I can only pray that those words are placed in proper situational context. That they all see them for what they were. And to let them pass. For it to be otherwise would devistate me.
You see. They were all right.
Jillian was right for giving voice to the fact that we, seemingly, were going to assist a lich. I'm sure many others had the same question. Jillian just asked it. It's instilled into her to fight and win over such creatures. To have it any other way is contrary to her training and her beliefs. I understand and respect that. I love her for that and so much more. Maybe....in my own blundering way I made it worse for her by siding with Sehky. I admit I could have done better. But Jillian should never be ignored. She should never be used. She should always be Jillian. Yet. Jillian was right.
Sehky was right. We had no other course of action open to us. As it was if we had delayed, as some suggested to get these items in our possession inspected, we would now be in a sea of firery death. He had not stated that we would hand these over to the lich without first making sure at every turn that it would be the right thing to do. He never said that we would just hand them over. We had to make that journey. And it didn't help my cause with Sehky when I sided with Jillian after he told her she could leave. The fact that I stated outright to the group our overall intentions regarding the journey. To decide our course of action once we got there. And lastly, and most firmly, announce that under no circumstance would I allow Jillian to wander back through the desert alone. I was going forward. And she was coming with me. Yet. Sehky was right.
Keela was right. She defended Sehky against the verbal barrage. And not just from Jillian. And there were times when I sensed animosity between Sehky and her. That should never be. That's not my little sister. Yet she was right. And like Jillian she should never be ignored. She should never be used. She should always be Keela. Yet. She was right.
And then there is me. I admitted earlier that I could have, should have, done things better.
My interaction with Jillian was late. I tried to lend support to her questioning of this venture but I failed on so many counts. Was it because I was one of the planners of this mission? Or was it because, like her, I can be head strong. My path was set and nothing was going to deter me. I don't know. All I know is that I need seasoning in this area. I need to get better. I know this isn't true. I know it in deepest parts of my being. But it seemed as if Jillian didn't trust me in this matter. I told her the plan. Please trust me to act accordingly. Ohh. After it was done it was all water under the bridge. But still. Please trust me to do the right thing.
With Sehky I'm rather confident I did the right thing by him. He wanted me to take the leadership of the group. I declined. Could I have? Yes. I can lead. Done it many times. I'm sure I will lead again in the future. But I have every confidence in Sehky's leadership. He should have the same. And it bothers me that he, seemingly, doesn't have the faith in my trust in him. If it were otherwise I would have taken the leadership. But it wasn't necessary. Additionally I would not have let him pass that mantle to anyone else either. He knows how to lead. He just needs to believe in himself. Just as I beleive in him.
Keela. I have no issues with Keela. She, as always, was just Keela. Steady to the core. How could anyone have issues with Keela?
Having said all this. I still worry. My love for Jillian is, and will forever be, unfaltering. My love for Sehky and Keela moves in different circles. None the less it's there and earnest. I must find someway to reconcile their differences. And as I've already written. For it to be otherwise would devistate me. - Riley finally succombs to exhaustion and falls asleep. The ink from his quill forever staining the pages in his journal -
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SOUL MOTHER VISIT.
I was visited by the Soul Mother again last night. Jillian, Zakariem and I were exploring the crypts north of Veil. All was going well. That is until we came upon a pack of vampires in the lower reaches of the crypt. It was filled with all manner of vampires. Most notably were those we could not see. It was full of hafling rogue vampires that materialized on top of us. I was sapped of all my strength immediately. Jillian was heroically keeping me alive but it came to a point when she had to leave. Just as I was collapsing to the floor the Soul Mother came to me and gently laid me down, kneeled over me and whispered "Five more". With that she reached into my body and plucked a piece of me to take with her and then was gone.
Jillian also found the bind stone but because the Mother was with me she was passed over. Zakariem managed to escape.
I have five more. Only five. She'll not get them without a fight. That I have promised Jillian. I know it's a fools promise. The Mother comes and goes at will. Her visits are at the time of her choosing and when she visits there is no reprieve. Only five more.
-
Jillian, Zakareim, Sehky, and I heard reports of increased highway assaults in the area of the Crossroads near Dalanthar. So we all decided to investigate. I was wondering about the makeup of the party being so close on the heals of the desert trip and this concern bore unwanted fruit midway during the trip when both of them turned cold to one another. Words were said and even though they were working as a team to eliminate the bandit threat it was clear that Jillian was cold in Sehky's presence. At one point Sehky told me he would leave and I stopped to talk with him. I told him that if he felt that way to please wait until we were clear of the bandits. While making my plea I noticed Jillian and Zakariem had back tracked to find us as they had ran ahead but stood off to give us privacy. As I walked past Jillian she whispered to me she was sorry. All I could do was whisper back that I knew. She made the same whisper to me repeatedly throughout the remainder of the night. And each time all I could say was, "I know love. I know." I desperately wish I could have said something else. As I honestly believe she needed more from me. But I didn't, and still, don't know what to say. Is she sorry about the tension between her and Sehky, or that she's sorry about putting me through this .... this dilemma? Matters not. In the end I want her to be happy. I want her to be at ease.
I thought that maybe a change of scenery, and foe, would brighten her mood. So to the peaks we went. Sehky asked me what I wanted to do with him. I responded that I wanted him to act as he had always had. That he find them and pound them from a distance while we would provide the frontal assault. He seemed relieved at that. Not sure what Jillian felt as I didn't look at her at that time. I do know that she pulled her hood farther over her head to more hide her features. But that may have been to gird against the cold we were headed into. In any event I wanted Sehky's bow at our backs. Regardless of his faith he is quite efficient with that bow. And I would be a fool to turn away such assistance.
Normally Jillian does a little dance when fighting the undead. She positively dances from one to the other. She giggles, makes witty remarks, and is happy. Not this time. She was an undead killing machine as always but the dance was gone. No witty remarks. No giggling. She was a machine. That's all. A machine.
To change the scenery we even ventured into the wolf cave and almost cleared two levels. There was one door, that I could see, to pass through to continue but Sehky gave counsel that it might not be wise to do so. I have no issue with taking such counsel so we left. But still Jillian was a machine. It was time to end her pain so I stated it was time to make our way back to the Crossroads and settle up. Just before we arrived Sehky asked Jillian if he could have a moment with her, in private, so I asked Zakariem to continue with me to the camp.
Although it seemed an eternity it wasn't long before they entered the camp. Jillian was first to arrive, her hood drawn down as far as it would go. She never said a word to me. Just passed by and took a seat by the fire. Sehky followed. Quiet and reserved. He sat by the stump on the opposite side of the fire away from Jillian. I was in the middle. Again. Tried to engage in conversation with Jillian but she didn't answer. It was obvious she would not talk with Sehky present. And although I knew that, I wasn't going to punish Sehky. So I held a short conversation about the wolf cave and how Ellis and I took Keela there. Then I asked him to leave. I had to talk to Jillian. He understood and gracefully departed. Then I turned my attention to one I love.
Her hood was still drawn so I kneeled to look into her face. She had been crying. That would never do. I sat beside her and gently pulled her hood back and kissed her tears away. Then she spoke. She said she was spoiled. That she had gotten used to the idea of never being alone again. It pains me to think she was ever alone. We talked. Topics were about our love for one another. How we might change who we are once we are married. But at the end it came back to her saying she was spoiled. And how she felt she was alone once again. It seemed that no matter what, or how, I said that she wasn't and would never be alone as long as I was there she never took that on faith and she always to returned to spoiled and alone. I had to stop. This conversation had to end. Maybe it would be appropriate to begin it later, but at that time it had to end. So I told her it was late. That this was a safe place to camp and I would do so. Then I asked her to join me so that I could hold her as she slept. She came to me and hugged me, crying, and said she would like nothing better.
So here we are. Under the lean to, under the stars. She's sleeping on the ground cloth I put down and I sit and write. Soon I will do as I said. I'll lay by her side and hold her. But I too will sleep. What will be when I awake? Will she still be here with me? Or not? I pray that she is. I told her that I would choose if I must. And that choice would be her. I would forego Sehky and Keela for her. She doesn't want, in any way, for that to happen and she would harbor resentment for herself. But I would make that choice. But ultimately it matters not. Because in the end I want her to be forever happy. I want her to be at forever at ease. And I want these things for the Jillian I love. Preferably with me. If it's without me so be it. As long as she is those things I shall be happy too. If she leaves during the night without waking me and I awake here alone without her in my arms. I'll have my answer.
-
Resolution (?)
Jillian was there when I awoke. Actually , she did the waking. I never knew such soft kisses could wake me so readilly. But they did just that. Perhaps it was because there were so many. *sigh* Regardless I opened my eyes and hers were smiling back at me. She was a changed person from the night before. The tear stains were gone. She seemed relaxed. Even happy. She told me she had to hurry. Duties you know. And with that she kissed me softly and ran off toward Dalanthar. I don't think I said one word the entire time. I'll see her later tonight. Here. By then I'll have erased these cobwebs from my mind.
__________________________________________________ ______________
Came back to the crossing and found Jillian, as expected, but what was not expected was that she was with Sehky and Keela. They were cordial to one another. Looked as if they had just returned from thinning the Trolics. Before I had a chance to say anything Keela left, followed closely by Sehky. Just a quick hello and goodbye was it and they were gone. Jillian's eyes were still smiling. A good sign right? No harsh words. No cold shoulder. I had to find out why the switch had been thrown in Jillian. Something had definitely changed. And I had to know what. She came to me and kised me. I hugged her close and then asked if there was somewhere pretty we could go to talk. She suggested a lake so I followed and she led me to a quiet little lake near North Pointe. Very pretty and peacefull. Yes this would do nicely. So I just asked her. Flat out asked her why the change. She said the division was hurting me and so she decided to "Put on her happy face"..... For me. She would do this for me. I mildly objected saying that she shouldn't do this for me. Not even us. If it's something with which she's not comfortable, she shouldn't do it. She put a finger to my lips to hush me and said, "I was friends with them before you. I can be friends with them again. Please let me do this." I nodded okay, she smiled, and then she kissed me more passionately than ever before. We moved closer and talked in whispers as we continued to kiss. I don't think in the entire time were were more that a slip of paper distant from each other. More talk, more kissing, quick heart beats. Faster heart beats, more kissing, less talk. Even now my heart races as I write. No! We can wait. And even though I would love to married today, now. It would be rude. And rude people we are not. Make an excuse to leave this spot quickly lest we indulge our passions. The guard is giving us awkward glances? That will do. Have no idea whether or not the guard even sees us. Still it's an excuse. Take a deep breath and draw her scent in. It's different. More alluring, if that can be possible, but there it is in the air around me. Push away and make the excuse about the guard. Kiss her gently and do what is right, not what's primal. We shall be married soon enough. Those passions can wait. They must wait.
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Soul Mother passes by:
Jillian and I were together when a messenger falcon deposited a scroll infront of us. It was from Sehky. He asked us to join him at the Crossroads. We were to clear the ridge of the undead and then continue through the wolf cave atop the mountain. The idea of dealing the final solution to the undead on the ridge positively delighted Jillian so I, or we rather, decided to honor Sehky's request. So we journeyed to the Crossroads and met up with Sehky and Keela. Also there was Micus. After preparations the five of us set out to the ridge. Jillian was spot on form. Even now it warms me to the core. She was laughing, dancing, and just .. I do not know. It soars within my heart to had seen her and think her such. It was like she had rediscovered a long lost childhood friend. Anyway. It was, and is good even now, to think of her in that state.
We made our way to the cave. The wolves, as long as you stay together, pose no real problem. It was after. Sehky warned us to stay together and we did. It would have made no difference. They, ice spiders, swarmed us. We never had a chance. Must face the reality that there are things out here that can deal us significant harm. Things we must plan for and execute well with the correct party. Otherwise we end up at the bindstone like we did last night. And even though I did not loose another strand. I saw her. She floated close to me as I lie there. Wagging her boney finger at me. Yes. It was her. And it was too close.
-
Alazira:
We all had recovered from our bad exprience with the ice spiders, and when I say all I mean Jillian, Keela, and myself. Sehky and Micus were able to escape and make it back down the mountain without further incident. We are at the Crossroads outside Dalanthar when a rather vociferous elf appeared. Everyone, save me, knew her and except for Jillian and I were as happy as could be at her appearance. I tired to get Keela's attention but she was so enamored with this new visitor she hardly noticed me. Matter of fact she out right ignored me. Maybe it was the fact that the newcomer was sitting in Sehky's lap and making cooing noises that had Keela distracted. What ever the case I would be ignored no more so I forcefully, and rather rudely I'm ashamed to say, injected myself into the never ending ramble of words that was being considered conversation. This, as was plainly evident, got her attention, Keela's also. From the newcomer an icy stare, but at least she wasn't talking, and from Keela a look of bewilderment. Sehky had a look too. Between the new arrival ceasing her squirming in his lap and roaming her hands all throughout his body, and that Keela momentarily removed her loving attentions from him to glare at me. He looked like a puppy who had lost his favorite toy, or toys in this case. But I had created a momentary pause in banter so I took advantage of that pause to introduce my self. She casually removed herself from Sehky's lap, which I thought made him almost whimper with disappointment, and turned her attention to me. She then said something along the lines to the others, not to me, of he's dressed in blue so it figures that he's a Toranite. What doesn't figure is that he's rude so that goes against his grain as one. Then directed to me she said , "Okay blue boy. I am Alazira, High Priestess of the Temple of Ilsare. My friends call me Zira. You call me Alazira. I don't care for Torys much. As I was married to one for what seemed a life time. Argos', do you know him?." I replied that I did. But probably not as well as I should. She immediately came back with the story of him kicking her out and abandoning her for, at least according to her, no justifiable reason. She also said that since I was in good company, by her standards, she would hold her tongue. At this time Jillian excused herself as she wasn't feeling well not yet fully recovered from our trip through the bindstone. Alazira and Keela both gave me funny looks, kind of well look who's been naughty looks, when Jillian excused herself. I have no idea, nor am I sure I want to know, what those looks are about. I just shook my head at Keela in confusion. She just kept on with that look. I thought she would never stop, and probably would not have, but Micus said that he needed to make a trip to the Frindahl Fortess and asked for our help in doing so. We all, save Jillian, signed on to the trip. So off we went. I stopped in to check on my love and found her peacefully sleeping in one of the tents. I didn't wake her. But when I emerged there are these two again with those same looks as before. For the life of me I cannot figure them out.
It was evident that Alazira was extremely usefull during this trip. Her talents are extensive and well practiced. And with her, and us, we had no problems making it through the defenses of the fortress and gaining the prize that Micus sought. Somewhere during that trip, and I forget when, she said I could call her Zira. I think a rather good compliment. We made our way out without incident and while we were headed back our trip evolved into a fashion show. Literally, as we were walking back, Alazira would run ahead and momentarilly disappear behind a rock, a tree, or something and then reemerge wearing a completely different set of clothes. This positively thrilled Keela. Who almost at once said she was looking for something to wear to a wedding. So when we got to the lake outside of Dalanthar we stopped. Micus said his farewells and the rest of us stayed for that purpose. A fashion show. Again the words between Alazira and Keela were flying. They must have looked at dozens of outfits. Where does she carry them all? Somewhere I got confused and thought that this had progressed to them choosing Jillians gown, which they were not, and I said that Jillian already had a concept in mind and that if they wanted to help they should ask her. At that they both stopped talking. I was amazed they could do that so easilly, stop talking I mean. I would have thought they would have to slow down gradually or face risk of permanent injury and deformation of the face when spewing words at such a rate. None the less they stopped. After a brief moment Keela stated that this outfit was for her to wear. Alazira echoed the same but she did add that she would help Jillian, if Jillian so desired. I apologised for my error and told Keela she could wear anything she wanted. She could wear the most elegant dress, stalks of corn, or even her most daring furs. To me it didn't matter as she would look beautifull in whatever she wore and that my main concern was that she and Sehky be at the wedding. At that Sehky said that he would wear his kilt. Again I stated it didn't matter. Just as long as they were there. It seems though that during all the passing of words and fashion changes Keela did settle on an elegant dress to wear. And I was correct. She looks beautiful as always. I excused myself and was making my way back to Jillian when we found each other in Dalanthar. She looked refreshed and ready to meet the world again. So that's what we did. We turned to face the world....Together.
-
CAPTAIN JILLIAN:
I'm beaming as I write this. Jillian has been promoted to Captain within the ranks of the Shining Hand. I never had a doubt. The position was open and desperately needed filled. She was the logical choice. But it wasn't given to her outright. She still had to earn it. There was a ship that washed ashore to the west of Fort Llast and it was rumored to be a meat locker, a vessel containing undead, We formed a group and made our way to the distant beach only to find that the ward placed around the ship had faded and undead were walking the beach. They were easily dispatched, as were the ones on the ship. I felt ill. My stomach in knots. I'm ashamed to say I vomited. But still I resumed my duties. Stomach pain and all. In the hold of the ship was an egg like stone protected by a wall. It took Richard a few times to disband the wall before we could get to the stone. It didn't respond to spells, holy water, or anything else we could think of so Jillian, my Jillian, produced a pick and started striking the stone. With each strike the feeling disapated in my gut. Once I thought she was going to fall ill. But she kept striking the stone. Then it cracked and exploded. I had my shield up and it took most of the pieces of stone. Jillian had no protection save the armor she wore but as she was directly over the stone when it exploded she paid the consequence. I'd though I lost her. She was badly wounded. Near death. I potioned her as quickly as I could to bring her back from the brink. I do believe because she took so much of the blow it saved many behind her. Because I had my shield up it did the same for those behind me. Alas we did have one young man succumb to the blast. But our priest saw to it he recovered. Now as I think of it. We did have another go down during the fighting in the ship. And the priest came through there as well. It was over though. My stomach returned to normal. Everyone was walking out. It was a good ending to a dangerous situation. Upon return the Commander of the Shining Hand inducted some into the order. Others he did not. One being William, the lad who's parents were murdered. So much pain there, anger as well. But I feel he needs it to mature. He needs to get past it in his own way in order to be sure he can control himself and thus control most situations. Enough of that. And Jillian. My Jillian. Was promoted. I'm still beaming.
-
It's been some time since my last entry. So much has happened. I shall try and be brief. But there are topics that need airing. I guess I'll just start writing and remember as I can. In most cases the order of events is not important. But to me, in entries such as this, the subject does carry weight.
1- I did get a chance to talk to Mari regarding my actions with the men involved with the death of William's family. It was right after Jillian was promoted to Captain. I had also requested that William be there but he was not. I can only surmize that the reason he was not was that he was not selected to be a member of the Shinning Hand. Instead he will fill the position of Auxilllary member until he .... he gets controll of himself and finishes more training. Regardless, he does not answer to me and his being here would have been completely voluntary. In any case it was Mari I most wished to talk to and she was there. And I ws gratefull to her for that. I made my explanations and she accepted them. The whole time she stood at attention. I told her two, maybe three times to stand easy. But she would unconsciously draw herself to be rigid. Then, in the Captains presence, I told her that I thought, if she kept up with her training, she would be an outstanding Paladin someday. No promises to such. It was dependant upon her and her willingness to stay the course. She beamed. And I thought to myself, "Why did I just say that?" While I was formulating an answer in my head Mari asked permission from the ... Captain (I'm going to have fun with that) to go eat before the others had fininshed it all. Jillian asked me if I was through. I absent mindedly said yes and off she went. I then knew why I had said that. I could see that it was in her. Mari I mean. She is focused, determined, smart. The list goes on and on. And I've only seen her a few times. Matter of fact only twice. But it's not my place to make such comments to the students under the ... Captain's charge. So I offered an apology to the Captain for doing so. It won't happen again. Yet I have this sense about Mari.
Upon leaving the Temple William was close. He was enraged, hurt, and in pain. Both Jillian and I could feel him. She asked me to talk to him. But I refused. *chuckles* (Refusing Jillian. Not likely to happen again) I do feel that it's in him to get over this tragic event that has beset him. But will be with the help of his peers and his internal fortitude. When, if, he comes through this he will be stronger, more confident, and then ready to move forward.
2 - I happened across M'Lady Clover as I was headed into the Silkwood Spider Caves to collect silk. I was as well. All this time and I never knew about the lady in Center who was offering true for dark silk. Just goes to show how observant I am. Should have been completed long ago. She was waiting for her husband Finn but he was delayed. Don't know the reason for his delay and neither did she. In any event M'Lady Clover was also in need of the silk so we came to an agreement to split what we found within the caverns and together we entered the caves. We were through the last part of the second level of the cavern when we heard commotion behind us. We hustled back and found Finn engaged with numerous bastard sword spiders. He was doing quite well but it would have been in bad form not to assist so I jumped in and helped with the remaining spiders. Now. Between the three of us we should have no problem clearing and collecting but M'Lady Clover spells were aparantley hurting them more than our blades so they continued to break away form us and head to her. One time she was poisoned and unable to move at her usual pace so I told Finn to stay with her. I do realize that they are married. I do realize that he is a more than capable fighter but I had struck the pact with her and as long as we were within those caverns M'Lady Clover, I felt (and will continue to do so) that I was responsible for her safety. She agreed to abide by my rules within the cavern. And truth be told she did at every turn. But Finn was not bound by that agreement and, by my estimation he would have rather left his wife and engaged the spiders rather than see to her safety. This irked me to the point of point blank telling him to stay with his wife. I was adimant in this. And still am. Too many times the spiders were peeling away from us to her. He would have had plenty of blade time near her. And that's where he needed to be. We got into a heated arguement and he said something to the effect of placing his "Size 13's" up my arse, I told him he was welcome to try. But at that time he was with M'Lady Clover so I didn't care what he said. While clearing the remainder of the second level M'Lady Clover was poisoned once again so I fell back to stay with her and let Finn finish up the few remaining spiders. Once he was complete I told him in no uncertain terms that while he was with me in this situation he was to never leave his wifes side. He did not like that at all and started to say something but I was in no mood and I left him as he was trying to form his thoughts into words. He was so mad at me at that time I probably could have rested twice before he uttered a sylable. I went to the last level and rested while they remained above. I was already rested before they came down. Actually, before he came down. M'Lady had problems with the small opening and I was about to head up to make sure she was safe when she finally poked her head into the lower section. Both had rested above so there was no need. But first I had to put forth the rules in that lower caven. Number one was that Finn stay with Clover. He bristled at that. But I ignored him. Number two was that if we saw any Rock Spiders we were leaving. Plain and simple. At that he voiced major objections to being told what to do. I then calmly said that if that situation arose whe was more than welcome to stay. And to die. But M'Lady Clover and I would be leaving. While I made that last remark I was mostly addressing to M'Lady Clover and I was looking directly at her when those last remarks were made. Now he was incensed for me to take the position of ordering his wife about. I told him I really didn't care what he thought about the remarks and that if necessary I'd carry her out while he stayed behind to die. I upset M'Lady Clover and I am sorry for that but there would be no discussion in the matter and I told her as much. By now he was livid but I really did not care. He kept flexing his fist over the hilt of his axe, But he retained the good sense not to draw it against me. Fortuneately we didn't see any Rock Spiders and cleared the lower cavern with out incident. On the way out she again had problems making it through the opening and again just about as I was headed down to assist her she emerged, This time I wouldn't stay silent on the matter and said something about the "knucklehead" leaving his wife below. Again he was flexing his grip on his axe and again he retained the sense to leave it on his waist. Upon our exit from the caves I told M'Lady Clover that it was a pleasure to be her escort. We split the silk as agreed. Then to Finn I said that to leave such a lovely wife alone in her moment of peril speaks volumes about his willingness to fight rather than see to his love's safety. Pity. And I left them both there. I'm sure he, again, was trying to formulate a coherant sentance but I was in no mood to hear what he might say.
3 - I have made a series of bad choices lately that have resulted in trips to the bind stone. Three of them to be exact. Each time the Soul Mother has passed me by. Not a hint of her, thankfully.
The first was when I encountered a group of mercenaries in the desert outside of Audira. They should have been routine. And they would have been had I been prepared. I was on horseback so I used the speed to catch them by surprise, or so I thought. A cleric in the group cast a storm and there I was sitting still upon Pearl while the rest beat us to death. More embarassing than anything really. When Pearl and I left the void I had that funny dream once again. I was again that ugly little dwarf. I was in Audira with Keela, Sehky, Talia, and Tane. It had to be a dream. I acted so strangely. I steadfastly removed to budge until my former self was returned to me. I was saying silly things and standing there like a statue. After some time the rest became tired of my antics, and I can hardly blame any of them, and Tane picked me up and carried me onto the ship headed for, who knows where. He carried me off once we got there and again I would not move. How utterly foolish can one be. It was a dream. It doesn't matter. These people are my friends. They know who I am. Even Keela was upset with me. Keela of all people. So it must have been a dream. And to top it off I was willing to let my friends go into the unknown without my sword there to render aid if necesary. So it HAD to be a dream. Wasn't it. I wonder. Because when I awoke I was fully dressed in my armor, at the dock, and shooing birds away from my face. No one else was around. It must have been a dream. It just has to be.
Second instance was when we decided to try the ice spiders once again. We had a formidable group. Most notable being G'ork. I had a bad feeling about the trip. I as much said so. But I went along. Worse than me going along was me dragging Jillian with me. These spiders are bad news. I knew it. But yet I relented and went. Still the Soul Mother, gratefully, was engaged else where. But until I have many more seasons behind me I'll not tempt them again. G'ork is formidable. I am not. And me walking into these spiders without proper wards or restriction in area where they cannot surround me is like leading a lamb to the wolves.
Third instance is entirely of my own doing. We were in the desert, Spirit Dunes, and I rushed into a room full of magic casters. I'd been there before and I knew what to do. I just did not do what was required. Jillian even warned me. Completely my fault no one elses.
So I made Jillian a promise. That I shall be more circumspect in my situations and learn how to say no. I need to let that nagging feeling in my gut rule over the desire to please people. I've only five more visits from the Mother before I rest with her eternally. It may happen. I can't promise not to visit the stone from time to time. It's my business to be out front in the fray. But I shall do my best to make that happen a long, long way off. I can be smarter in how I approach situations and battles. No more running in without a plan. No more being surrounded by creatures and beings that can cause me substantial harm.. That promise I've made to Jillian, the love of my life. And that is a promise I fully intend to keep.
There was one positive thing that did happen after my bindstone visit courtesy of the ice spiders. Keela asked me why I've taken to calling her "Little Sister". I can never say no to her and in any case she deserved an answer. But these words were for her. Jillian was there and, as usual was my rudder through it all. So we removed ourselves from earshot from the rest. And there I told Keela, my "Little Sister", the story about Silool. The diary. Everything. But what I'd told no one, what I'd held to myself was that I was ashamed to have forgotten Silool. That someone who loved me so much I could forget and that it took the writings from her wonderfull diary to bring her back to my memories. That was until I told Keela and Jillian of my shame and that I never wanted to forget such things ever again. Then I told Keela that Silool was Ilsarian. So in a way I guess I'm keeping Silool's memory alive through Keela. Keela, my Little Sister. And because of that I have, and will always have, a special place in my heart reserved for her and Sehky. To me they represent all the good things Silool was, and will forever be. They knew me not. Yet they befriended me and helped me through the first weeks after I had returned. I feel much better having told this to Keela. A weight has been lifted from me. And I breath easier as a consequence.
-
My goodness the wedding's only a short time away. And I have yet to get Jillian a ring. I must do that without delay. Other than that concern I am ready. New smart outfit, yes. Rehearsed my song to her at that alter, yes. Well I'm not that good at carrying a tune. But it's a short song. And I know she shall love it (I hope). At least I don't think I'll torture anyone with the bad notes. But I've yet to test it with anyone else. I was thinking Keela. But no matter how bad it is she will say it's wonderful. So I'll just sing it the one and only time in public at the wedding.
Speaking of Keela. My little Sister has offered to teach me Elven. And I think I can learn. I just hope she has the patience with me to see it through. But as long as she wants to try I shall be her diligent student. Jillian says that if I learn I'll have to translate everything they say. Jillian hates when they talk Elven when we are with them. She always thinks it's about her. So I'll translate. As needed. Anyway I hope to start right away. I do so admire the language. It seems to flow. And now I may be able to appreciate it even more.
-
Soon. But not soon enough. Jillian and I will ....FINALLY...be married. Seems a life time ago that I asked her. Seems a life time ago since I was with her last. But soon that will all be a memory. She asked me last night if I minded if she were to keep her last name. Of course not. Just as long as we are married. That's my main concern. Her name is important. But if I can't see my way past her wanting to keep it the same then I'm being selfish. And with her I guess I am a bit selfish. But only in the sense that I want to be with her. What ever her name. She did have an interesting observation about all the famous Toranite Paladins having a last name that started with "ST". So I made an off handed joke about changing my last name to Stuart to move myself into the last name with an "ST" at the beginning. Of course it's a joke. Albeit not a good one. I'd never give up my name. It's the only legacy I have remaining from my real parents. Like I said. A bad joke.
Jillian has been, for sometime now, eating herbs and drinking tea made from those same herbs that's purpose is to ... prevent conception. I'd never noticed before so I asked her. She told me what they were for and then informed me that she told me of them some time ago. I freely confess that I do not remember. Does not mean she didn't tell me. Just that I don't recall. She asked if it was a problem. I said no. The truth. The problem is that I could forget such an important conversation between me and the woman I love. But then again, if not engaged in battle along her side, I'm in a fog. She still has that effect upon me. I do believe she always shall.
We both visited the bind stone last night. Courtesy of the Awakened Souls just outside of Huangjin. No visit from the Soul Mother, thankfully, for either of us. So we took the time and sat by the pond in Hlint and talked about our future together. I held her close. Nice to do that. But I'd rather it not be because we need time to let our souls settle after a trip through the void. Still nice though.
While we were there I noticed a change in her. I told her and I could feel her get tense. Not that kind of change. It's in her scent. Basically it's the same. But there's a subtle change. I've noticed for weeks now. Possibly the herbs? It calls to me. It's been getting louder. More demanding. Last night it was screaming at me. Perhaps it was my weakened state because of the recent void visit. Maybe the call was just that powerful. Regardless the reason I found it hard to resist. I managed. But the scent still lingers in my nostrils and screams to me still.
Upon leaving the pond we encountered M'Lady Breanna and a young lady I have not previously seen. A young lady named ... Ytsim.. If I recall correctly. She was asking about where she could get some bandages. I offered to her some that I had. I have plenty. I'll never miss them. After that I excused myself and made my way to get the flowers for the wedding. Let's see singles for Jillian's mother and sisters, Keela, Ellis, Mari, Commander Daniella, and Samantha. And of course a bouquet for Jillian. All blue roses. They look nice. And smell nice. I took a large inhale from the bouquet to try and purge Jillian's scent. But it was no use. Going to be another night without a good sleep. Marriage to her cannot come soon enough. I need the rest.
-
It's FINALLY done. Jillian and I are now one. And it was wonderful. The Citadel was a magnificent location. All her family attended along with her friends. Most notably was Commander Daniella, who was escorted by Commander Eagleheart. She wore a dress. She should wear one more often. Takes away her rough edges. Well, anyway, others in attendance were Samantha. Practically the whole Stargazer clan. It was nice that they were there, especially Mylanna. They all mean so much to Jillian. The two most important to me were there. Keela and Sehky. I half expected Sehky to wear his kilt. *smiles* But no. It was Sehky as Sehky. Completely appropriate. Keela on the other hand was sporting a beautiful gown. But again. I've said before she could make the most plain of garb seem elegant. But still. There she was. Obviously uncomfortable. At times twitching against the fabric on her sleeves. I whispered to her that she was beautiful in the dress. She smiled nervously and I wiped away a tear. She was, and always will be, lovely. My little Sister.
Then there was Jillian. My Jillian. As I watched her approach the vision I first saw at the Crossroads was in full bloom. She was beautiful in her gown and she oozed happiness as she practically had to drag her father down the aisle. Well. Maybe not drag. Urge would be more accurate. As Mr. Stuart passed her to me he gave me the glare. The same glare I'm sure he gave his other sons-in-law. They one that says, "This is my little girl. And she always will be. You be good to her or you'll answer to me." kind of glare. I nodded acknowledgement to him. I understand perfectly well. And I could not agree more.
So there we were. Together before the priest. Reciting our vows. I sang my song for her. Badly I'm sure, but it's was my gift to her. And for me to try and sing in such a public forum has to be because of my unyielding love for her. I can think of no other reason. She told me later that it was a lovely song. So I guess the sour notes were worth the effort. Then. Then the kiss. Something we have been only able to do in private moments. Right there in the Citadel no less. It was then that I knew I was truly married. And I've never felt more complete.
Thank you to all who attended. Thank you for your wishes and your love. But mostly. Thank you Jillian. I celebrate the day you found me. And now I can celebrate the day you made me whole. By the way. Have I told you today that I love you?
-
Keela, or I should really say, Naacil sat me down and started my introduction into the Elven lauguage today. She gave me some basic words to practice and I shall do her bidding in this. I told her I'd be a good student should she decide to tutor me. Well anyway here are the words and names:
Quecceill is Jillian. I wonder how she would take to that if I called her that openly. I will ask her before I do. They are both beautiful names. Yes. I'll ask her. Maybe it won't be a full time thing. Only for private moments. Or maybe a code for something. I'll have to think about it.
Toran is Anemil
Illsare is Ecclailma at least I think that's right. I'll have to check with Naacil.
Aey is you
Lracce is hello
Veewfaa is goodbye
Laamenw is sword
Feam is bow
Ceela is love
Ceananca Laelaanam (I think) is Little Sister
Anirillna aey is thank you
Laairna is Sehky
Naacil is Keela.
Mecaa is me.
Those are the words and names she gave me. From those I can say (badly most likely) Anirilln aey ceela (Thank you love). Let's see what else. Ok here's one. Anemil fcalala Quecceill. (Toran bless Jillian) and simple things like that. I'll keep practicing. Toran knows I need it.
-
Will this ever end? This Cinder business keeps going. Enough is enough. First of all it's time to bring all the right people in and destroy this cursed book. Who ever that might be. Let's get it done. The longer this thing exists the more opportunity for it to fall into the wrong hands. SO LET'S DESTROY IT ALREADY! Not only that I thought I was going to get skewered by Naacil when I let slip that Mark, Jillian, and I were attacked by these ... four furies .... ,they called themselves, in retribution for vanquishing Cinder. So I'm on a hit list of sorts. Apparently it's a dark order of some type. Mr. Driggles tried to explain it all but it's all so convoluted and ultimately confusing. There is an upside to it, if you can call it such and if it's true. Mr. Driggles said that these ... Furies ... fight amongst themselves for the honor of setting out to kill me. That's a good thing. The numbers dwindle as they squabble. But in the end there will be another attempt. And hopefully just one. Anyway when I let slip that this was threatened to me Naacil was beside herself with anger. Initially no words would calm her. Only the return of the conversation to the destruction of the book refocused her. But still I feel she is angry with me for holding such information from her. I'm not sorry Naacil. I'll not put you in danger over this as well. If they want to come. Let them come. I'll face them. My concern is that Jillian and Mark are mixed up with them as well. Bad enough for them to be on my mind over this than to subject my little sister as well. So like I said. I'm not sorry for keeping it from you. I was a fool to let it slip and now I am sorry because you will worry about Jillian and I when your immediate focus should be on Sehky and this cursed book. So let's do that first and foremost. Let's destroy this book. Please. The furies will, or will not, happen. I'll deal with them in time. Naacil. You just take care of Sehky. *smiles*
Not only that, it seems that we have a planned attack brewing. Something to do with the Lady in the Red Cloak that was being escorted by Aesthir in Fort Miratrix. Supposedly there's a pact being struck with giants and assassins moving into position. And the signal will be shortly after the Lady in Red appears. We must be vigilant. Aesthir has some explaining to do. He may be an innocent pawn in all this but yet he needs to come forth with what he knows. Not to me specifically. Perhaps to the Elders of his faith. But someone. And soon.
All the more reason to deal with this book NOW and eliminate what we can rather than postpone the process and possibly deal on two fronts.
-
(not from in game)
LITTLE KICKER
The time was close and as much as Jillian wanted to stay active it was too much for her. Her back was racked with pain almost constantly now and even though all throughout the pregnancy she carried herself well these last weeks were miserable for her. But she never complained, well maybe just a little. Always faced the day with a smile and her only complaint was that she thought she looked liked a dancing cow. Never! She's radiant and beautiful even on her worst day. But regardless of how I see her it's time to go. Little Kicker will demand an audience soon and we must be prepared.
We had talked about where the birth should take place and after short discussion we both decided that it should be at her family home. What better place? Her mother and sisters are there and will want the very best for her and the newborn. And the temple is close by should anything go amiss. So we packed and headed for the docks and caught the next ship to Huangjin. The voyage over was uneventful. That is unless you consider Little Kicker noticeably assuming a lower posture to be uneventful. Jillian's back was now on fire and I knew she wouldn't be able to complete the walk to her parent's house without many rests. So I paid one of the young seamen to go out with the pilot long boat and deliver a note to her parents. The ship's Captain was the same as when I came and asked for her hand and he told the young sailor to make haste or in his words, "Prepare for a thumpin", if he didn't go there straight away and not only deliver the note but offer his services. Another three hours crawled by as the ship made it's way into dock and the gangway was across. But even before that we could see that the young man avoided the Captain's wrath. There on the pier was Abygale and Richard. They had with them an ox drawn cart filled with straw. Both appeared to be calm. But I'm sure that their stomachs were turning. Mine was falling and tumbling uncontrollably.
At first Jillian refused the cart. She kept saying she wasn't infirmed and could walk but Abygale wouldn't take no for an answer. And it was good that she did. At least Jillian could be somewhat comfortable, kind off, as the cart rumbled along the path to the house. When we arrived Jillian's sisters were already active. When her youngest sister Sandra saw Jillian she sent her son straight away to fetch her midwife. Thank Toran for that as neither of us really knew what to expect and things started to move rapidly. Almost immediately upon entering the house Jillian gasped and her legs buckled as she doubled over in a shot of pain. A copious amount of fluid covered the floor where she stood. I was on the verge of panic. Jillian had the look of bewilderment. Abygayle just smiled and weighted the room with confidence which calmed us both and said that we got there just in time. The pain passed and Abygale slowly led Jillian to her room. I tried to follow but a look from her sisters and a gentle hand on my shoulder from Rick kept me from proceeding further. It was at that time that the midwife arrived and hurried into the room with bag in hand. And the waiting began.
"You know. It doesn't make the time move any faster if all you do is stare at the door. And before you ask it's only been a few minutes from the last time you asked. ", Rick said. I give him a muted smile and try to look away but every noise that comes from within the room demands my attention. What are they doing?, How is Jillian?, How much longer?, are the questions racing through my mind. There is increased commotion from within the room. A muted scream and Abygale's voice urging for someone to push. Push what? Quiet now. Then it starts again. What in all the hells is going on? I look at Rick. He smiles and tells me it's alright. Soon now he says. How can he be so calm? Then from the room I hear, "There's the head! Push child! Push! Almost there. Just a little more. One more child, just give me one more good push". Then silence. Followed by sobs and soft crying. I stand to head to the door. Is something is wrong!? I must know.
I take a step toward the door and it swings open. Sandra steps through the door smiling and wiping away tears. "It's a boy." she announces. "Jillian is fine. The baby is fine. We ... are fine. Give us a few minutes and you can come see her and your son".
A son! I ... I have a son! I feel Rick's hand on my shoulder. "Welcome to fatherhood Riley. Look. *he motions to the door* They are ready for you. Go see your wife and say hello to your son". I rise and make my way to the room. Or do I? I don't remember taking the steps to get there. I was just there. And what I witnessed was beyond all I could ever have imagined. Jillian propped up with pillows holding our son in her arms as she cemented the bond between mother and child. Tears of joy streaming down her cheeks. Tears streaming down mine I'm sure. I make my way over to her side and kiss her gently on her cheek. "You are amazing." I say. And I take the first real look at who she has been carrying for all these months. "He's beautiful." I say. "No. Handsome. He's handsome." she corrects me. Of course. Handsome. Our handsome son. Richard Alexander. Welcome to a confused world Richard. And I lean down and gently kiss him on the head. Welcome to fatherhood Riley. Don't mess it up.
-
I know I should have not done it but I left Jillian, just for a bit, without telling her. Events overtook me and I had no choice but to leave without letting her know. Not a very husbandly thing to do. So as penance I have decided to write twenty five times the following:
"I, Riley Alexander, will not stand my pregnant wife up again. I know better than to leave her sitting on a log for days on end. I love her dearly and respect her time more than that and I will not allow it to happen again. I will buy her a dozen roses and give her a dozen foot rubs to make up for it."
In Elven. This was a difficult task to find all the words and put them together so they make sense. But I do believe I've been successful. So without any more delay.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
E, Mecaa Ilca'illwam, amecc lean laanillw sa tymavlillan ameoa yty ilvilel. E nleam faananam anirill ane cailela iram laeananelv el il cev oem wilala el alw. E ceela iram wailmca illw malatyanyan iram anesa sema anirill anirilan illw E amecc lean ilcceam ean ane iriltytyal ilvilel. E amecc fya iram il wejal melaala illw veela iram il wejal oeean myfla ane silna yty oem ean.
Whew! Now I am done. And I need to get the roses, the best I can find, and start on those foot rubs right away.
-
Riley's Crisis of Conscious
From the journal of Riley Alexander: Have I been a good husband and father? That question torments me. At my core I know that I worship the very ground that Jillian treads upon and I could not be prouder of Richard. So why do I have this nagging doubt? *sighs* And yet I do know the answer. My time with Jill is fleeting at best and the time with Richard has been, well, to be truthful almost not at all. The knowledge I have of him are reports I have from my treasured wife. Not from personal interaction. No... I have not been a good father. He's practically a grown man now and I know not where his interests lie. Why could I not have taught him how to fish? Does he even know how? Is he a good swordsman? If he is half as good as his mother he is better than me. Is he a swordsman at all? So many questions such as these I have but without any answers to place on the other side of the ledger. *another , but deeper sigh* I know my duties have taken me far afield. And I know that it was of the utmost importance that I be where I was. The Commander would not have asked that I make these treks unless they were of significance. Truthfully they were and I have gained much in knowledge and experience because of them. But they have been at the expense of my wife and son. Jillian has been busy as well and she fully understands why I have been apart from her. At least I hope this is the case. But I have doubts regarding Richard. Does he really know the gravity of what was transpiring at the time? Or was he too young? That time I can never regain with him. So the question still stands. Have I been a good husband and father? *Places down his quill and rubs his tired eyes. Time for sleep. Yes. Sleep will hasten the arrival of a new day. The day of his return. The day of his quest for answers. The day he will hold his Jillian again. And the day he will strive to know his son. *