Journal of a drow (Zanirth's)

[Niles09]

- Sielwood  Eamane said I had forgotten the most important thing secret she had told me about her past, else things where good. I tried, I have tried so much to remember it, maybe Ive really forgotten it, after all my mind has been rather overloaded the last time.
  The bad feelings are easing. The rage slumbering and I feel much better, yet still a little empty.
  I saw a note in Wild Surge some days ago, Spugle had written it.... WONDERFUL NEWS! he is alive! and he is back, cause he was calling for the giants Brigade. I hope to see him soon.
  I met Wolf aswell. I havent met him so many times, but I remember him very well. The first time we met, we ended up in a most heated argue about my skincolor, but later we started over again, without arguing instead I explained my past and we became friends. I think Wolf is the only person Ive befriended even though it started out in such a harsh way. Anyway he needed help. Someone had put a bounty on information on him. Some friends of him had arrenged to meet those persons at some inn, the "Scamp" I think. I will have to look closer into that, before things happens. He thinks its his familiy, he hides from them, and have done that for many years. I know the feeling, thats just how Im hiding too. Its 6 or 7 years since we met first, so I can only just remember he told he had some issues with his families in the past, hmm maybe there was some paladins or clerics in it too.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  I'm planning to make a better cloak, yet I will need gems for that. I found Eamane in the craft house and asked her. Quite a group there where assembled there, I couldnt help notice the way Isilme threaded a girl by her side, creepy.
  Anyway I went to broken to kill a few deaders, and met Kloss on the way. We ended up killing alot and was a good team. Deeper in the forest we got attacked by a really huge basilisk, not just a normal one. It was really thoug. First it petrefied Kloss, so I took fort my sword to get its attention. It took a few beats before it, I guess, turned me to stone. It only felt like a second then I could move again, though I was much heavier wounded. Kloss was still a statue so I fought it alone, it was badly wounded but not bad enough, it would kill me first, but luckely the basilisk then turned to Kloss... not that I wanted him to die! but I got a chance to sneak it. Two well placed thrusts later it was dead. Kloss nearly too, it was a close run.
  Later in broken we got attacked by some really strange creatures, not the usual stuff. I said it might be the dead ranger that was mad, the deaders was beginning to give little money too. Kloss said it was because too many passed by. And just then two others came by. I suddenly realized why the ranger might hunt this place. It is a stupid thing to lead the high road to the egde of this place. It should be in peace.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  (The following detail s travels throughout Sielwood and Zan's different experiences here. She's trying to refocus her mind after the last chaotic months. After nearly two years she decides to return to the civilated lands.)

[Niles09]

- Southern parts of Sielwood
  Ah its good to be back. There didnt went much time till I bumped into Dorena. It was great to see her. She told me she had gotten twins!
  I also met this drow, Cymeran I think, a follower of Azatta. He talked about his god, I said I didnt follow her, cause I didnt owe Azatta anything, yet we shared the same goals. He invited me to come to some sord of gathering for Azatta's followers. Hmm why not?
  Later I bumped into Dorena again together with Alleina. We had a little talk. I got the story about Broken. Seems that the ranger there had been in love with one of the seven sisters, apperantly a mean one. She had summoned the zombies to guard his grave. Appearently she communicated with his spiret, but now that he have found peace and have went on, the sister have gone crazy and cursed the forest. It looks like dark wood now. ... witch!
  A few days later I met Jin. He had become and uncle, things have truly changed! I helped him finding some almonds. Though we never found them we had a nice trip.
 
  I feel much better now! The nearly two years in Sielwood have given me peace. The anger is gone.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  I've heard rumors that Vestlyn is still alive, its only rumors, but its certainly better than nothing.
  I met Sen in Sielwood. Good to see him again too. He hadn't got a niece or some kids but he had started on making instruments. He showed me a vio-lin, and also told be about other strange things like guita-res and something I cant remember the name of. We discussed the situation in Broken a bit, I had lost my hunting grounds and he the easist way to getting oak.
  A few days later, I met Cymeran again in Hlint. At first he didnt recognize me. He was together with someone called Junta (a tiefling), Nepp (a drow I cant remember the rest of his name) and some silver haired woman. Hmm there might have been a fifth person as well. Anyway, we had a nice chat, they really were some nice people. I even maked alot of trade. Goodness they needed equipment, both oak bows, swords and leathers. I traded my old bear leather for some very nice bracers with Nepp. Heh heh he might want to retail the armor abit, I used to wear it. I also sold my oak bow to Junta, it was easier to let it go since it have only been collecting dust the last two years. Sabrissa came by. It was nice to see her again. She told me she was going to marry Barion.

[Niles09]

 - Sielwood
  I remember my first few years among humans. It could be hard sometimes, when strangers assaulted you because of your skincolour. I learned to ignore them, stick to my friends. But what happens when your friends turns against you?
  I met Cymeran and Nepp again. Funny guys, can't discuss much else than weapons scrolls and such stuff. Then Jacchri came by. Started muttering about drows all over. Since something obviously was wrong I catched up with him. What have become of him?? He speaked of my friends as untrustworthy and spies of the drow. He've never done that. People began to garther, and suddenly several was beginning to thread us. Jacchri nearly got hostile, ordering Nepp to put his bow away. Goodness, both that mad dwarf Varka (who once knocked me out without reason in the woods) has come with his axe drawn, and some big woman also got her maul ready in both hands, yet he didnd thread them to put their weapons away (or me at least.) People was really hostile. Jacchri speaked of some drow attack that had been on Hlint, but there was really no reason to assualt a group of three drows (where one of them was me, and at least I expect me to think of me as a friend, so that makes two unknown drows.)
  Ignorant humans. If they knew the pain excistance is in the underdark, if they where born there they would try to flee too. They see us as the ones to bring suffer, yet I think it is we than suffer the most.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  Outside Hampshire I met Jin and Xan together with Tegan (I think Ive met her once or twice some years ago) and some Remiel. They where out to get a beholder eye. Sounded interesting so I couldnt resist the invetation to come along. We went to the cave in the gnoll infested mountains. Ive been at the first level many many years ago with Spugle. We had quite a diffucult fight there, and had I known what lurked below at that time, I wouldnt have bothered to go there.
  This time though, we needed something there. The beholder eye. Jin said the tunnels led deep down, past earth elementals and Illithids. A chance to kill Illithids was, one one hand comforting (they are some evil buggers, without exceptions) and on the other hand quite terryfieng. Even my mother thought them evil! (and that means really evil).
  Actually things went completly smooth until the beholder mother. We started fighting some battle devours. I saw some magic thing coming towards me, I suddenly felt very hard and things went dark, then what felt like moments later, I opened my eyes again, seeing dead beholders everywhere. I must have been turned into stone. Xan was dead but Jin healed him. With the eye we returned to the surface to Sielwood.
  It felt good to be on adventure agian. Once more Im whole.

[Niles09]

- North Point
  Days or weeks ago I think, I was sitting quitely in Hlint when this girl came by. Appearently and elf my size and figure. SHe gave me those eyes, passed em several times, she even howled at me. Well, no surprise really, people tend to do that to me. But this one got interesting later on. A few days ago when I was sitting in Hlint she came by again. She smiled alot to me, and asked for the way to Rilara. So I told her. She kept smilling. Well my impressions was that either she had learned that we surface drows aint so bad, or maybe she was just being niceto get the information.
  But it doesnt end here. I met with Cymeran and Grem. Asked them if they would help me getting the minotuar leader for this cap in Nort Point. They would, but we needed others. Suddenly we where a half army. Elgren, Elgon, this little halfling Lyala or something, a dwarf Thorimir I think, Marcus (I think!!), Grem and Cym. Before we where about to leave, some Paladin showed up Kinson. It didnt sound to me as if he was gonna come. He asked why we where killing those minotaurs. Well that cap asked me. (And the practice would do me excellent, so I better can protect the forest and myself if the time comes). This elf also showed up, the one from before. Her name was Alassë. She had a nasty looking spear or halbard, not sure what exactly it was. She didnt howl or greet me so that was ok.
  Kinson showed up to be of trouble. He was the real paladin type. He didnt want Elgron to summon his skeletons, (they showed up to be very useful later). But well, we went in. Half through the dungeon our group got halfed. Cym, Marcus maybe, the dwarf I believe, and maybe Kinson and some others probaly felt in a giant battle. I thought the rest would go back for the others, while I scouted ahead. But suddenly when I was sneaking quitely around in the later rooms, they come. They havent got the others but we fought on. We found the head of the ex leader on the floor. Probaly a recent leader fight. But hell, Im not paid to kill the ex leader, but the leader so we went on. In the end we simply ran out of healing. I think it was Alessi or Elgon that felt first. Then we took a break. In the fight that followed we got the the chief. Some of their nasty mages got some hits on me, and appearently the cheif didnt like that I fired arrows some very bad places, so he suddenly went through all the summons and chopped me down (I guess). Last I saw was a minotaur chief filled with wounds, very deep wounds. In North Point we discussed wether we should give the cap the false head. I dont like doing that. If the cap cant count on the chief death he might underestimate them, and the village might be surprised by a powerful raid. Think of the families there. Luckely Grem, the only suvivor, returned with the real head. So we got the proper reward.
  Later on in Hlint, Alassë acted rather friendly. Asked me to be the leader of a big group of unexperienced people. I told her I was glad she didnt gave me those looks anymore, and she said she liked me?! Well a chance in motion I guess. About the group, oh goodness dont put me in lead of such a bunch. When we where going back to our graves in the minotaur caves Kinson refused to use trickery like invisibility. Against his honor. He also refused the use of Elgrends skeletons if we where to fight back. In this new group there was lot of this sord of unexperienced people, knights and palas. Dont put me head of such a group! They didnt have any respect for the life of ogres. We went to the start of grey peak, killed the easy one and left. Really it was without reason. The others didnt think so. They said they attacked first. What?! THats the most lame escuse Ive ever heard. I tried to explain that they defended their lands, when we come here heavy armed and armoured they have the right to strike back since both of us know we are coming for kills. Stupid stubborn people. They only see things in black and white I hate such people.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  Ive run into this elf several times again. Funny that she likes me. Her acting have made me realise what my life have been, and it saddens me. Allasë is happy, welcoming, talking and blind to the darker things in the world. She nearly started to scare me when she said a excited "hello!" everytime we hadnt seen eachother for a few minuttes. Yet I envy her.
  Ive never been innocent or ignorant to evil. Right from my birth my mother made my life a hell in the name of Vierdi'ira, I spit on that name. I found friends on the surface though. But so many are lost. I remember the early days of my realationsship with Eamane and Isilme. Good times, I nearly forgot about the dangers that I hide from. All the people I learned to know, gone. Some death. But worst of all the coranithes. A new "god" entered my life and cast a shadow over me. I no longer feel the anger, but a shadow have befellen my mind. Ive seen to much death, sick behavior and suffering.
  The gods must hate me.

[Niles09]

*The script is difficult to read, appearently written by a very excited hand*
  Ive done it! Ive done it, Ive done it! The first of my goals, I did it!
  I ran right out in front of the ogres, they saw me, I know, they looked at me charged towards me! But! I jumped into the shadows of a cliff. The shadows.. they embraced me, made me a shade, I became one with them! The ogres looked around, but couldnt see me...

cause I was dancing in the shadows

[Niles09]

- Sielwood

So what happened? The last weeks Ive become close to reach my goal of mastering the shadows. Heh heh I remember the faces of Nepp, Cym and Grem as I told them I was nearly one with the dark, ofcourse not symbolic meant. It Bcame almost creepy the last days. The shadows half stuck to me, now it looks more natural.
I can be a shadow. I can disappear right in front of a living being by entering the nearest shadow and then disappear. Should my mother come back, it will be hard to catch me very hard.

Other things of interest. I adventured with Jin and a few unkown people, S’handa, Dulan, Sue and a most brutish woman. Im not sure wether she was human or half orc, not pretty at least. It didn’t go long before we got into an argument. She appearently thought it as fine to kill the treants, just because they attacked us because we trespassed right through their territory (and I did warn the party). The best argument of her seemed to be that I was a dark elf, and she wanted to solve everything with fight. Evil Savage I say.

[Niles09]

- Sielwood
  Me and Allasë had a trip to Rilara. It was good. I showed her around, first the place of the sneaky birdies, told her the story about me tricking a giant into believing I was a spirit in its head, and showed her bone hill. (which went a bit wrong when a demon started chasing us, but we escaped alive!). I enjoy her company, her happy moodrubs off on me, things arent so dark as they used to be.
  My new ability to dissapear into the shadows has proven quite useful. Not only to save myself, but also to save others byusing myself as bait.

[Niles09]

- Forest of Mist
  When I entered this forest I met a rather strange dwarf called Bjornigar, or well he acted pretty normal at first until we (hmm or mostly him) had smashed the giant camp, and he got his eyes on a boar. He went mad and smashed it to bits! I was more stunned by his action than angry, why in the name of nature did he do that? Appearntly he thought that it was a jinx pig that maked giants pop out of nowhere. I couldnt help but ask if he was sane. hmm I didnt really get a straight yes. But a funny guy he was, and we took out a huge group of giants.

[Niles09]

- Wolfswood
  Its funny. Some people say they fight for good for the preserving of life. How many of does have I seen slaughter animals without reason? How many times havent they failed me when I warned them not to enter the territories of the wild animals, yet they did it and killed. The only person who I remember respected this warning was Kobald, the dwarf that I nearly got into a fight with, on several occasions.
  I guess such things truly seperates friends from socalled good and kind people.
  I met Elrend, Glenn and Alassë in Hlint. Friends I consider them. Elrend even showed interest in my past, and asked for my story. Not now I told him. So, we went to Dregar, hooked up with alot of others among them Ael and Sahala, old friends. Everything went finem until we where leaving the Vale heading towards the satyrs. I told them not to attack them. I told them the satyrs just defended the woods. They said they would kill them if the satyrs attacked. Honestly, if someon walks well armed and armored and buffed into your home, wouldnt you react? If the last many people who did that attacked you?
  Yet they ignored my call. Elrend and Glenn said they wouldnt help in the fight. Blessed be Alassë wasnt there at that time. So they murdered the satyrs. Seperated themself from friends to the group of false goodness.
  People have so little respect for nature.

[Niles09]

 - Sielwood
  Well have to describe it. I was trying to convince Cym and a few others that we should do something instead of sitting in Hlint all day, when Taislin just came walking down the street. Oh joy! He is back! Ive had so much fun (and trouble) with him, and he is back! He still had his reputation, as I was chatting with him, I heard Ozy and Angela discuss wether they should get the bounty for him. Even among some of the newer people he had made himself known.
  I gave him my bracers that casted darkness, I dont have any use of them now that I can dissapear into the shadows whenever I want. I made sure to strictly warn him not to use them for trouble, cause I didnt want to see him in jail again because of me.
  Other interesting things. Me, Jin, Karana (I think) a little hafling and a ranger went to Storans. It have never been like that before. After slaying many many numbers of undead, It looked like Storan got tired of us. When we was cathcing our breaths before the final room, mummies started to come all over the corridors. We kept them off back by back, but they just kept coming so we started moving back out of the cave. Even at the hills they kept pouring fourth.

[Niles09]

- Hurm
  The last time has been dull. Nothing happening, Im growing impatient of waiting. Slaying weak ogres is not my style, a waste of life really. However only Cym and Nepp have been around lately, and Cym have not been much for adventure lately.
  Cym is really a cleric of Azatta. Convinced that everyone can be turned. We made a deal that if he could turn my mother I would join Azatta. He actually took it serious. I didn't my mothers heart is so dark even a demon would get horrified. I explained him Ael once slaugthered some evil drows, not thinking of turning them to Azatta at all. Cym didnt like it, he really believes in redemption.
  He somehow reminds me of myself, or what I was like before the business with Corath and all that. I used to share his thoughts about saving our people, turning them away from evil. I dont care much about it anymore. Ive seen too much evil to fight it all, and Im growing tired of it.
  However Cym promised me to join me on adventure a few days ago. So just the two of us went to Dregar. I think we did well. Pirates, scorpions, ants, antmen, giant and mushroommen fell before us. We really worked well together. He buffed and summoned and then healed me as I fought the hostile creatures. It was good to do something again.

[Niles09]

- Saudiria
  So Cym is starting to say that Azatta loves me. We had a discussion about that a few weeks ago. She still lack to impress me. I have no reason for ever worshipping her, she have never done anything for me. Ofcourse Cym channels her power, to strenghten me in combat and heal me, however that goes both ways, I wouldnt get very far on Dregar without Cym and he wouldnt get very far without me. My heart belongs to the green forests, the wind, and the wild creatures. After visiting the Anoroch desert so many times Im also beginning to like the place.
  Pranzis was invaded by Bloods men. I fought there for days. In the end we lost. It was a pretty bad end. We where attacked from all angels. I tried to get a defense up in the merchants square but we couldnt hold it, and non of though fighters from the east front was interested in helping us. I guess I found my way there. I couldnt help but feel a pierce in my heart as I saw the others get chopped down by Bloods dwarves while I dissapeared into the shadows, but what else should I have done? It didnt get better when I returned to the eastern line that was broken by some mad succubus, and I repeated the hiding thing. At that time every front was defeated and we retreated to the castle. There the guards handed some flags out to us (magicial, they have proven very good), and then we escaped the city through the castle. I also found a nice pair of boots, the magic in them however, is too strong for me to wear them yet.

[Niles09]

I have fallen in love with you… Its still a bit confusing. Those words explained everything.
The last months have been strange. When I see him, I have this odd feeling in my stomach, and why did I get so upset when he complimented that woman’s armor?

Then a day like any else I stumbled across him in Saudiria, Cym. He gave me a ring and then said “I have fallen in love with you.” I cant describe the joy I felt, I was speechless for a moment, when I realized what the feelings I had had in his company was. I was in love.

So… Since then things have been happy. Maybe more happy than they ever have been. Even the fear for my past is weakening. I feel safe in Cym's company.

[Niles09]

Zan's CDQ:

A Matter Of Trust

*The following passage is some places hardly readable. The script is obviously written by a shaking hand, and some places there are spots of tears*  I still hardly understand it… What I thought just was a childish dream, too good to happen, happened a few hours ago. My father is not only alive, he’s also a good person a follower of Azatta.  I’m over enjoyed! I can hardly understand this! Hopefully I will get to see him again soon!    I better write this from the beginning…  For a while something or someone had been stalking on me. Obviously someone who didn’t want to be seen… Skills like my own, so that’s where I got my talents from! At that time I was beginning to get enough. I told Cym, Nepp and Dorena about it. And when we noticed a shadow slipping trough the cemetery doors we decided to find this creature. Maybe I will grow so skilled one day! It was nearly impossible to find him. He only showed up in glimpses and the different people of Hlint made it impossible to track him down. We where lead outside Hlint when we saw a glimpse of the shadow crawling over the wall and out to the goblin lands. For some time we were without clues, until I saw him between the goblin hills. I made a cruel “mistake” and ran after him, before Cym, Nepp and Dorena could react, and moments later I felt a blade against my throat…… I guess we both were desperate. I guess it was necessary… He asked me to come to Sielwood alone. The others maked a camp outside the wood, and I went in.  I didn’t feel like going completely defend less, so I made a ring of traps and sat in the middle, then he showed up. He revealed himself as a drow. At first I was alarmed. His colour were as mine, very dark, only a few drows have such a dark colour as mine, so… he could very possible be from my area, which could mean he was after me. He was, though not as expacted! Oh joy! I.. but I will tell the story first…. He started calling me child, didn’t help it, that’s something priests do… Then he called me daughter… *very shaking script here* I cant describe this… He was my father. However, at the moment I would have no idea if the romantic ideas about my heroic good father going against my mothers will where true, or if he was as.. evil as the rest. He told me he was a member of a small community of rebel drows, or followers of Azatta.   Ive been through extreme anger, sadness and happiness in my time, though never have I been such a wreckage as that point or now.. It was a dream come true, the impossible, a glory Ive never thought I would have in my life. I did my best to hold myself together and not burst out into tears.   However the happiness was short. He suddenly said he should leave. It hadn’t been his intentions to find me, “selfish” he called it. He was on a mission for his community, a very important one. I just couldn’t let him go. After a long talk I finally convinced him that I could not let him risk his life without doing anything. However, he said that since he couldn’t look after me, I should have some other to do that. So he asked me to find my friends, make them swear to me and their gods, and only then he would be there when I returned.  Blessed be them. Dorena, Cym and Nepp sweared to me without hesitation. Good friends indeed. When we returned to the forest my father once again appeared. He made them swear again. Then he explained his problem. Apparently a spy had infiltrated his little community. Because he had the.. experience in tracking down people and kill them, he had gotten the task. He must kill the spy before he could contact his allies. However things have gotten complicated after groups of those have appeared. The spy for the moment, was jailed in Velensk prison. I must go and murder the spy… and with a special dagger my father gave me, so no one will be able to contact his soul. Harsh I know, but he could have leaved the community in peace.  I cant wait to get this done, to see him again, Me, Dorena, Nepp and Cym have camped here to rest and be ready for tommorow, though I cant really close an eye.  *The next passage or the journal is written over several pages. Some places the script is stroked out, obviously in frustration. Generally the writing is spread out instead of the closely written text back in the diary*  How many days have gone? I cant count them anymore?   He didn’t come back, how FOOLISH of you Zan, he didn’t say anything about returning though why did I then do this, which I can never forgive myself.   Maybe it was wrong to trust, he could be anyone, stupid stupid stupid thinking Zan that’s where you emotions get you.    I doubt I ever will forget this, would not be fair either, let that be an example.    We tried to plan it. We did our best. I wanted to talk with the guy first. I got plenty of those cursed tattoos or whatever it is across my body, should be enough to trick him into believing I’m there to get the information he had, making him reveal himself.   However things did not go as planned. I don’t know much about the rules for prisoners, and we did not have time to learn them. I tried to disguise myself as a cleric of Roferien but the guard just wouldn’t let me in without papers. I tried to sneak in but he saw me, I got out but after that the prison was crowded with guards. I began to panic. How to get in? Cym got in using his magic, though I should be the one to talk with the prisoner. I don’t know what Nepp did but the guards caught him.  A dark figure stalked around the prison, Dorena found his tracks, obviously he was trying to get in. At that point we where running out of time.     So I asked Dorena to get the guard in front of the prison’s attention. She did well she did. She cut herself in the leg with a dagger, then screamed she had been attacked. The guard in front of the prison maked a big group of guards from the prison run out and over to Dorena. Then I knocked him out and sneaked in.   When we where in, Cym started to cast darkness. Chaos began. I tried to knock out the Jailor I think Cymtried too. He was a though guy didn’t pass out, but I got his keys. Tried two doors and got into the prisoner. There I hided in the shadows, somehow the guards didn’t think long about why the door leading into the cell had been opened, and left me alone with the prisoner.            From there everything went wrong. I acted like I was from Vierdi’ira and here to get the information he had. That just maked him go crazy. He called for the guards, revealing my cover. In desperation I grabbed him trying to keep control of him by holding the dagger to his throat, telling the guards not to get in, kept them frozen for a few moments. I did my best, really… Said that if I wanted to kill him I could do it now, but we could escape using his darkness spell. Every sense of sanity had left him however.      I could leave him, get out of the prison and fail the mission that had been so important for my father, if he was telling the truth.. The other choice wasn’t better, I wish I hadn’t done it.. I could trust me dad blindly and kill him.             He kept screaming, pushing me away he was in terror, it was horrible. I killed him. I killed him in cold blood. I can never forgive myself this evil act.  

  I’m a murderer, I’m a bloody evil murderer.  

It was not a problem getting past the guards using the shadows and my agility. I ran to Nepps cell punched the keys into the door and got him out. Then we run out of the city. Most of that is a blur really. I couldn’t stop seeing the prisoner’s terrified face. There was a lot of guards around, shouting about drows attacking the city.   I returned to the forest alone. Sad and ashamed, only the thought of seeing my father again kept me going. I waited a day, two tree I have waited many. He said he easily could take care of those groups of drows that had come to find the spy too, but why haven’t he returned to me? His daughter. I threw the cursed dagger into the deepest pond I could find in Sielwood, if he want to have it back, he could just come and ... get it!… Maybe I’m demanding too much of people I guess.   Im hiding now. Went into Hlint and quickly went out. They’re searching for me and Nepp they know how we look. A goodness even worse, I’ve maked my race even more unpopular especially in the south. I feel so ashamed. Some have done so much to put our race in a good sight, Cym for one.   I want too see them again, want to be together with friends, forget about the memories haunting me day and night, murderer, murderer. I just feel so ashamed, I don’t think I can face them again.     I must remember this as a lesson, I mu….  *and then Zan ran deep into the woods*

[Niles09]

*After the affair with her father, Zan spends nearly a year traveling the forests. Most of the journal describe how much she miss her friens especially Cym. SHe is pretty much alone with her grief until she sumbles across a little panther kitten after some months. Appearntly the parents are dead, since the area a filled with tracks from humanoids, and the kitten obviously is starving. After she have given it some food it keeps following her and she decides to raise it. After a half year she takes a quick trip to Hlint*
  I made a looong trip with him, so he would get real tired. Then I returned to Hlint, just to look around.
  Suddenly Cym just stood there. Ooh I have really missed him, and he was glad to see me too! He didnt think it was so bad with the whole murder thing. We went to Haven with some others, and after that the trolls... I couldnt really concentrate in any of the places. First I was together with Cym in Haven, after a half year! Then...
  Cym asked me to marry him! I love him so much, I dont know what to do without him anymore. Ofcourse I would marry him, though I tried to warn him, my path might turn rather dark. He would follow me trough the nine hells he said. Zanirth Vrinn... I do like the sound of that.