Diary of a curious Elf

[DMOE]

Headed off to do some crafting to try and tidy up slightly.  Had a conversation with Shar as she is worried about Brit and me.  I’m not sure I managed to put her mind at rest but I tried.
So there I am crafting and Thais came up and handed me a letter.  I was nice; really nice I didn’t have a go at her or anything.  I was as nice as I could be although I’m sure Elladan would have told me off.  Upshot is that she has said she will help in anyway she can and I didn’t laugh!  See I was nice!  It's not really her fault but she was in danger of all my fustration at this exploding over her and she's young so I'm sure she'll learn.
So she leaves and I go back to crafting and a large guy and Kai walk up, not together but at the same time.
The large guy introduced himself as Rakan and asked me about shiny rocks.  I did my best to explain that you can sell them to some people and he offered to sell them to me but I can’t really justify spending money on minerals so told him that and he decided to throw them away!  Well can’t let good rocks got to waste!  Will have to dig out a ring to give him next time I see him. He left to dig clay for Kai.
Kai noticed my new/old scar and commented he’d not seen it before.  He asked if it was branding and then had to explain branding to me.  Why on earth would anyone wish that done to them? He also showed me his tattoos on his chest.  Think it was just an excuse to take his shirt off.  He said he was worried about me too.  Then he needed to help someone in the Goblin caves so I tagged along. Afterwards we went to the campfire.
We had a very good and strange talk.  Must be my day for them or something!
I continued to discuss the scar with Kai.  He does genuinely seem concerned about me.  I told him that as long as he respects my marriage I am happy to be his friend.  He told me that he would never do anything to interfere with my marriage and I thanked him for that.  He did admit that he really likes me and when I said I didn’t understand what the attraction is he pointed out that it was probably better for our friendship and my blushes if he didn’t tell me.  I had to admit that was fair.  He did comment that it would be an adventurous night should be ever be together and when I commented that a night would be all it would be and that’s not my thing he replied that it wasn’t his thing either and a night would be the minimum he would ask for.  I gently reminded him that I can’t give him that as I love Brit very much and he said he’d not realised he had spoken out loud and wasn’t asking so not to worry. He wishes to be my friend and has asked me to always be honest with him.  I think I can manage that especially as although he does say the odd inappropriate thing he does seem to care and he is respecting my marriage to Brit.  I couldn’t be his friend if he didn’t as Brit is going through enough with Dougal without Kai making it worse!  Although I’m fairly certain my husband isn’t jealous of Kai and he certainly has no reason to be!  I like Kai but as no more than a friend.  I do find it strange he said these things to me as he’s getting married soon.  I would not have married Brit if I didn’tlove him with all my heart so why would Kai marry someone he doesn’t love with all his heart and if he loves her with all is heart why say these things to me?

[DMOE]

Decided to go to the Leilon Arms with Angela and Trysk.  It was nice and I enjoyed myself, other than Ozy licking me.
My scar seems to be the work of Kea, the Avatar I owe the debt to.  It seems she has drained the poison from me as a favour to Ozy.  I gather there is more to it than that and I probably won’t like it!  Ozy can be so infuriating but I’m sure I’m not the first to say it and won’t be the last! At least I know what the scar is about and the fact I’m not poisoned anymore!  Brit will be happy to know that.
I eventually got bored. I think growing up in an inn tends to make me get bored of them more quickly, so I took a walk home to snuggle down and wait for Brit.

[DMOE]

Went to Hlint.  Was chatting to people when Pendar walked up. I gave him the possible good news on the poison front!  Pendar was in a strange humour and wastelling me how he’d upset a druid earlier in the day.
A young man ran passed by very hurt.  I offered to help and he said there was no need.  He introduced himself as Gaia.  He has no memory from the time before he met the dragon and was after some help.  I called Pendar over as he’s best with questions and answers but before we had much chance to try and sort things Gaia had run off again.
Some of them headed for the crypts and Pendar head off after Gaia but not before he’d threatened in jest to put me over his knee and spank me, a strange humour for him indeed.  I found myself left with the newly returned Jet who tried to tell me it was dangerous to be seen with him.  Oh how I laughed!  We swapped some of our tales of woe and he realised I am living in interesting times too.  We separated and I went to buy a hood to go with my costume.
It took a while but I managed to get it to match the outfit Elhara made.  I hope Brit is looking forward to the ball as much as I am!

[DMOE]

I worry, I worry that I am doing something to cause this interest in me.  I’m not sure what it might be but it must be something!
Brit fell in love with me and me with him and that is all good and well.  He is the man I wish above all others and holds my heart in his hands.  A kind word or smile from him makes me soar and a look or sour word can make me crash!
But then Dougal shows an interest in me and  Kai tells me he really likes me but understands I am Brit’s and wishes to be my friend.  Ozy accuses me of flirting with him and it seems like half the time I meet new people and they are male they find it a pity I am married.
I’m sure I didn’t flirt with Ozy although I can ask Elladan to be sure as he was there and I don’t think I flirt with people I met on the trail or in Hlint.  
I try to be nice and polite to people but that is all.  I do understand that sometimes what a woman wears can have an effect on men but this happens when I am wearing my leather armour.  I don’t own a more practical outfit and hardly think it is exciting!
I have no idea what is going on.  Certainly I don’t remember there being this much interest in me at my Fathers Inn. Maybe it has something to do with Blood’s impending invasion, maybe it’s making people more aware of the joy’s in life but even so I fail to understand why the interest in me!
I am a simple person very inexperienced in these things.  Maybe I should seek council elsewhere but where?  
I can ask Elladan as he is a man and may have an insight but I class him as a brother and he classes me as a sister so he might not understand it either.  
I could ask Kai but he preferred not to tell me what he likes about me before for fear of jeopardising our friendship and making me uncomfortable so I would not wish to force his hand on this issue.
I don’t want to ask Brit because I don’t want to draw attention to this at the moment as I know he is finding the Dougal thing hard enough to deal with.
I don’t really have a female friend other than Elhara I really trust yet and I’m not sure she would know either.  Maybe I could try asking Sy or Angela and they would help explain it to me.  
I tried asking Ozy what Dougal sees in me and wasn’t quite sure what he meant.  Maybe I should see if Elladan understood it better.
I certainly can’t ask Dougal as he will lie to get his advantage.
I can’t ask Master Noss as it makes him uncomfortable when I talk of these things with him.
I could ask Rolf if I can find him.  He is a cleric and has been nice to me.  Brit and Master Noss both respect him a great deal and he is trying to help me.
I will have to think on this more and hope I can understand it.  I do find it strange that there wasn’t this interest before Brit.  Maybethe joy of Brit’s love makes me shine and if this is the case then it will have to be something I get used to and learn how to handle as I never want to change his love for me!

[DMOE]

Met Brit in Hlint today and decided to join Pendar, Kai, Jet and a few others in Haven mines.  We did really well until the end when Brit and I fell.
When returning to our graves we met Sy and Aries.  Sy was not feeling well and seemed to have had a strange experience and we discovered there where Minators in the mine.  We got to our graves and came out.  By this point we had a fair sized group including Elladan so we went to investigate. It was very hard and Elladan fell. We took him back to his grave but decided to leave investigating for another time and went home.
Brit was worried about making love to me.  He seems to fear forcing me into something I don’t want.  I hope I made it clear enough that I wanted him.  I managed to bite his lip by accident!  It was a good afternoon’s sport!

[DMOE]

Went to Rilara to deliver a message for the postmaster.  We were helping out a few people while we were then when Dougal appeared and put his hand to my stomach.  I told him not to touch me and he informed me that “she will be mine”.  It’s safe to say I had a bad feeling at this point. Elladan didn’t see him but heard me speak and Brit returned from scouting ahead just time to hear Elladan asking if it had been Dougal.
The Avatar who had show us Dougal’s lair before appeared and asked if she was too late. I resisted the urge to say many things and just replied yes.  She grabbed hold of my left arm and Brit started to shake and then turned and walked away.  I sent Elladan after him.  She explained some more about the nature of the poison and why it is important Dougal does not realise I am no longer poisoned.  She also confirmed I am pregnant with a girl.
Brit returned and Elladan gave us some space.  I gave Brit the good news and we were talking when Elladan appeared and told me he had made an oath to his god to protect me and the child.
Brit started telling Elladan that if the baby is a boy we will name it after him and I was nasty and ran off.  
Elladan came to talk to me and explained that he’s oath is about me and not Brit and he answers to me and a few other things but by this point my head was starting to hurt again!
I returned to make me piece with Brit, explain that I will not be treated like glass and agreed to travel home.  Not much was said on the journey. Back other than we have decided to keep this development a secret other than telling Master Noss.
Brit was a little strange when we got home but I can hardly blame him!  I held him in my arms and sang him to sleep and once I was sure he was asleep I went and explained aboutthe poison to Elladan.  He told me that my child is destined for greatness but the powers at be do not know if it is for good or evil yet.  If Dougal gets her it will be evil and devastating for everyone.
Nice to know that once again I am under no pressure!  I just hope Brit can cope.

[DMOE]

Went colecting Aloe and knuckles for Master Noss with Kai today.  Aries aslo joined us for the knuckle hunting.  It was a good way to clear my head!
Kai was slightly concenred when he healed me and I screamed but didn't seem to realise I was faking it!
We sat around in Hlint talking while I waited for Master Noss to arrive.  Kai ask me to keep his behaviour a secret from his intended.  I told him that I would not bring it up but if she asked me a direct question I would not lie either.  He seemed ok with this and to be fair his behaviour has improved a great deal!
Master Noss and Pendar arrived.  I asked Pendar for a quiet word and explained the need for Dougal to think I am still posioned.  He said he will go along with subterfuge for which I was thankful.
I then had a quiet word with Master Noss and explained my 'condition'.  He was very happy and concerened.  I have suggested that he and Brit might make the crib together as a joint project to help distract Brit from everything.  I also told him a little of what Elladan explained to me and how I worry Brit will react to being told his child is important to the great scheme of things. He was understanding as always.
I do worry about my beloved.  I know he wish nothing more than to settle down and enjoy me and our child.  I doubt life is going to be that easy!

[DMOE]

Ended up having another long talk with Brit.  It’s an interesting marriage at present!  We are either fighting (each other or for our lives), talking or making love with the occasional eating, drinking and sleeping.
We had a long discussion about the Avatars.  Brit has an idea about what they are up to and I can’t prove him wrong anymore than he can prove me wrong as we agreed to disagree and be cautious.
He also reminded me that we are not to lie to each other.  I asked if omitting to tell him something for his own good is lying.  We then discussed that. He is worried that the Avatars will take the child.  I said as far as I knew only Dougal wished to but that I thought Brit had guessed that. He had so I pointed out did it really matter if I knew how Dougal wished to do this and didn’t tell him if he can’t do anything to stop it and I know it will only make him worry more.  He had to admit I had a fair point.
I can’t tell him what Elladan told me about our child as I know he will decided the possible potential for great evil is down to him being the Father and the possible potential for great good is down to me being the Mother.  I couldn’t handle that if he did!  Selfish I know but I think I have enough on my plate at present and again he can’t change it at the moment so I will leave it until he can and he can shout if he wishes!
We also discussed telling people I am with child.  He wishes to so I am thinking on the matter.
We retired to our room to make up for a while and then headed off to get supplies to make more arrows.
On the way I decided we should start to tell people.
We collected some hickory for arrows and Brit headed to the Craft House to work it while I headed to collect my ox.  Mith was sat on a bench so I said hello.  There were some other men talking near by and one of them asked me about Kai.  It was a very strange conversation.  He wanted to know how trustworthy Kai is.  I told he I trusted Kai but he should decided for himself which is very similar to what the others had said!  In light of my conversation with Mith regarding love I ask him if he wished to meet Brit.  He agreed and we walked to the Craft Hall together.
Ever thought something was a good idea until you did it?  That was how I felt as I introduced them!  I was relieved I had spotted Ly’s young man and had the opportunity to see how Ly is.  He told me she is fine but he hasn’t seen her for a few days.  He will pass messages on to her for me.  I returned to discover the atmosphere was little better and then we discussed gems.  Mith gave me some expensive gems he claims to have no need for and I could hardly refuse! Brit left to sell some sawdust and Mith asked me if I can activate magic items and gave me one to try.  I could!  Brit returned and I showed him!  Mith then gave me some magical gems for future use.  He asked to speak to Brit alone and left after the discussion only stopping to say good bye to me.  The discussion was about arrows or so Brit tells me.
We took a slow walk home and Brit gave me another magic gem like one of Mith’s that he’d found on a goblin. Then he carried me to bed!
I did find it ironic that having decided to tell people I am with child we didn’t see a single person I wished to tell!

[DMOE]

Took a walk into Hlint and saw Pendar, Angela, Trysk and Lan in the Smithy.  Kai then joined us.  Lan had a mucky rock he didn’t want so he kindly gave it to me.  Angela did not seem herself and left us to sit outside. I went to join her and I hope I helped. I suggested she walked with me to clean my rock and we ran into Thais on the way.  She is a strange one that girl.  I took my leave and went to wash my rock!  It was Feldspar which I look forward to working.  
I returned to the Smithy to find just Kai left.  We had another chat.  He is a terrible flirt but I think he does understand I am Brit’s and Brit’s alone. I told him he should not marry unless he knows he will never want another woman than his wife.  He told me he can’t think about anything else when I am there.  I reminded him I can only be his friend and he said that is all he wishes.  I don’t believe him but as long as he respects I am married I can be his friend.  I told him about the baby and he was happy for us.  I took a walk to his house in Haven and he kindly gave me some iron weapons and suggested he takes Brit and me hunting sometime.
I was starting to feel slightly worn by now so made my excuses and left.  It was a good time although sometimes he flirts a little too much for my tastes but it is just his way!

[DMOE]

Went into Hlint to do some crafting.  I am getting better each time I work with gems and the steady rhythm of working them helps take my mind off other things.
On my way out if Hlint I had a chat to Lan again.  He seems nice and explained to me about Neushis companion animal.  We also saw Jet but he was a little too busy to talk.  Lan and I chated for a while longer and then I went to rest.  I am finding I am eating, drinking and resting more since I discovered I am with child.  I’m sure that must all be in my mind rather than what is needed for the baby!

[DMOE]

I met Brit in Hlint today and while we were talking Ranewin and Pendar arrived.  We told them our good news and they were both very happy for us. It was really nice to enjoy telling people.  Trysk arrived and when he’d finished saying hello to Ranewin we told him also.  He too was happy.
Pendar turned Ranewin and Trysk invisible as a joke and then did the same to Brit.  Brit was a terror and kept fondling me until I pinched his ear and reminded him I am good at spotting things.
Pendar, Trysk, Brit and I decided to go and collect some copper.  It was a good trip although Pendar healed me so as Trysk was with us I had to scream out in pain but Pendar did a good job of looking concerned.
When we came out of the mine Kai invited us to go hunting.  I went to smelt copper ore with Brit first.  Brit was so sweet helping Pendar and I to make sure we were doing it right.  I think we both had good days on the smelting front.
I felt grimy and tired so decided rather than hunt I would have a bath and rest but told Trysk and Kai to make sure Brit didn’t get hurt.  I hope he enjoyed himself as I think he needs to go out and let off some steam especially if some of his comments today are anything to go by!  I have never blushed so much!  Even during conversations with Kai.  I know Brit is proud of getting me with child but I was surprised by some of the ways he chose to express it.  Although to be fair there was no really harm do it was just more than I am used to.  Also the sight of me hot and sweaty in the forge seemed to be one he liked.  I suppose I should be thankful Pendar was with us or God’s knows what someone may have caught us at because it is very hard to refuse my husband when he puts his mind to persuading me!

[DMOE]

Well today was an interesting day indeed!  I brought a house!  A home for Brit and me to raise our daughter in.  I did have a little help though.  Master Noss had called into the estate agents to check for houses as he often does to find a house in Fort Llast was for sale.  He quickly sent me a bird and I went to meet him.  He offered to lend us the money so we could have a good start!  I told him if he did that then I was going to take it off the 100k he insisted Brit pay me. He agreed and gave me 55k which is slightly more than the house was but means I can buy furniture.
I love the house!  It has space for a common room, kitchen Master bed room, bathing room, nursery and store room/study.  There is also a room for Elladan who I know will insist on moving with us.
Master Noss and I looked round and then I arranged for the movers to sort out furniture from our old room but they managed to send it to the wrong place so now we’ve got to wait for them to sort it out!
Master Noss sent a bird for Brit to meet me outside the house and went to collect the things he had taken out of our chests before the movers arrived and lost them.
I popped to pick up a bit more furniture before Brit arrived and got back to see him reading my name on the door.  He seemed really surprised but very happy.   I showed him round and he insisted I kiss him in every room!  I had the oven installed and we put some chests in the storage/study area.  We are both so happy!!
Brit left to see if he could find someone who is making some potions for him and Master Noss returned with our belongings.  Which included an ingot of silver I’d never seen before.
Master Noss seemed sad that we were leaving the house in Blackford even though he understands we need more space with the baby on the way.  We had a good talk about visiting and the such.  I then cheered him up by taking him to the bank and giving him 5k towards the debt.  He said that Brit has a lot of armour at Blackford and he is willing to take it in trade towards the debt.  I told him I could not accept that without talking to Brit first.  Master Noss said that Brit is very lucky to have me as I’m a lady but I’m just me!  Master Noss seems to think that is enough!  Master Noss left and I headed into Hlint to go to the furniture shop!
I ran into Kai and Ranewin so told them my good news!  They were very happy for me.  I also met two elves and Kai’s intended.  She seems nice enough.  One of the elves seemed sad I grew up in an inn but I don’t understand why!
A big group decided to go to Dregar.  Brit and I thought about tagging along but bythe time we got to Fort Hope I was feeling tired from the days excitement and we both realised we were out of food and should really hunt!
Hunt we did.  It was wonderful to be hunting food to cook in our oven and for our larder!  I asked Brit where the silver came from and he told me Kai had given it him because I’d asked for it.  I did comment that I’d offered to trade for silver with Kai and Brit apologised for not doing so.  I told him it was ok as he didn’t know and if Kai hadn’t asked for anything it must be a gift!
We had a very good hunt and returned to our house.  I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that!!  Thanks to the movers we have no bed so we made a makeshift bed in Elladan’s room.  We cooked and then we christened Elladan’s room properly which may be a bit mean but it’s our house!  Anyway we aren’t going to charge him rent as I wouldn’t feel it was right although he can sort out his own furniture!!!
It was nice to fall asleep in my beloved arms in our house!

[DMOE]

I ran into Mith today shopping in Hlint so I offered to show him the house.  He seemed to like it.  We did end up having a very strange conversation abut friends and why they do things for each other.  Mith was trying to convince me he is evil and dark while I tried to convince him he isn’t and we all have our moments of darkness.  I could swear a couple of times he tried to tell me he like me as more of a friend but I’m so bad at reading people that way I can’t be sure. It was a very long and strange conversation.
Mith was answering the Queens call to deal with the Minators in Seilwood Ruins so I went along with him as I’d arranged to meet Brit there.
We went along and Brit arrived.  We listened to the Count explaining what was happening and then left with the party. When we reached Fort Llast Brit realised he had an important errand to do but suggested I go to see where the entrance was at least in case we couldhelp later.
We kept getting attacked on the way and I was very little help at all and then we reached the entrance we were ambushed by a group of minators.  Once caught me a glancing blow as he passed and nearly killed me.  If it hadn’t have been for Rolf’s healing I may have died.  I decided at that point that I was just a liability and also that it was too great a risk to the baby.  I excused myself and carefully returned home.  
I finished the decorating I had left to do and snuggled downon the couch to await my husbands return.
// OCC We were only heading towards this epic dungeon as it was a DM organised quest.  Leanthar has declared it off limits in the following post
http://www.layonaraonline.com/forums/forums/thread-view.asp?tid=18934&posts=1

[DMOE]

Was sorting out Elladan’s key to the house when Brit arrived home.  I finshed up and Elladan left to pack his ox while I discovered Brit was distant and not quite himself.  We had some time to kill before the Masked Ball and I suggested we spent part of it engaged in a good ‘roll in the hay’ so to speak and he said he wasn’t in the mood. This was slight cause for concern but it does happen.  He also didn’t seem to care what we did to kill time so I suggested we took a walk into Hlint and wash a mystery mineral I have. He agreed.
We were just leaving Fort Llast when we ran into two Dwarves one of whom at least knew Brit and asked how he was.  Brit was very un-talkative even for Brit.  He also failed to introduce me as his wife.  Something he normally really enjoys doing!  I was explaining about the Masked Ball to the Dwarves when Quinn arrived and we continued to discuss it as he is one of the owners of the Arms. Obviously Brit got bored because he walked off.  In fact he walked off so fast I only just managed to catch up with him before he reached Hlint.  By this point I was starting to worry!
We were stood by the bank as Brit was chatting to someone when Angela arrived and asked me if I wished to go to Haven Mines with her as they were having a girl’s only mining trip. Now I felt so torn!  I so rarely getting invited on these things but it was obvious that Brit was not happy.  I did the only thing I could think of as fair and asked him if he wished me to go.  He said I was to go and enjoy myself with my friends.  I asked him if he was sure and he said he was so I took him at his word! He said he would sit on a bench in Hlint and wait.  Ranewin had also arrived outside the bank and been asked to go along
I headed of to Haven with Angela and Ranewin and we picked up Thais and Sy on the way.  It was a good trip!  We had fun and I got someamethyst to work with later.
I went back to Hlint and Brit wasn’t there.  I could only hope I’d see him at the Arm’s later.  Lan and Gaia were there though and Elladan arrived shortly followed by Mith. I asked Mith if he was going to the Ball and he said he was busy but did have some more magic rocks for me.  He then took his leave!
I asked the others if they were going to the Ball and offered to show them the way.  Then Angela,Ranewin, Trysk and a few others came past going to the Arm’s so I suggested we head off with them.  Somewhere before Hlint and Blackford Castle we lost Lan and Gaia.  We waited and eventually set off again!  We got to the Arm’s with no problems and I sneaked off to put my costume on.  I was going to wait until Lan, Gaia and Elladan had gone in but they were taking ages so I dodged past!
I recognised Brit straight away!  It was his own fault for wearing a costume which showed off so much of his body.  I know every inch of that body so well!  I went over and spoke to him but tried to give him no indication it was me.  I walked over to the bar and ran into Lan on the way back who guessed who I was an complimented me!  Brit offered to buy me a drink which was good as I’d forgotten to go to the bank and while he was at the bar Gaia displayed an interest in me which I hope I managed to dissuade without giving away the fact I’m married.  Brit returned and chatted.  He mainly chatted about how wonderful his wife was which was nice to hear. I’m sure he knew who I was but wasn’t going to ask!  Pendar arrived being a ‘ghost’ which was fine until his invisibility wore off!! Eventually I became tired and Brit decided he needed some fresh air and I took this as a good chance to leave.  I made my excuses and followed him outside. He was stood out there without his mask making him even more handsome!  I revelled who I was and suggested we walk home.  We got to the gate of Leilon to find Elladan waiting for us in case an escort was needed.  For some reason this did not please Brit but I didn’t comment.
We arrived home and Brit didn’t even say good night to Elladan.  I said goodnight and then went to join Brit in the lounge as we’ve still not got our bed sorted out yet.  He was sat at the table and asked me if I’d enjoyed the Ball.  I knew he hadn’t from the very little he’d said on the walk home. I told him I had and he did seem happy to know that at least.  He suggested that I sleep on a couch and he take the floor.  I pointed out we could put the cushions on the floor and have a makeshift bed.  He commented it was worth a try.  I suggested we sorted out the cushions andthen he could ‘help’ me out of my costume. He said he would rather just rest. I could see the stress on his face and I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.  I suppose it was just a matter of time before all the stress of the past few weeks caught up with him.  I told him not to worry and asked if he’d like me to sing him to sleep as that always calm’s him and he at least let me do that for him.
As I lay there holding him after he fell asleep I did wonder if I am being selfish?  I mean he has given the impression that he is coping with everything and carried on as normal in almost every way so is it unfair of me to expect him to continue doing so?  Should I have stayed with him rather than going to Haven?  Should I have suggested we didn’t go to the Ball? While I enjoy our ‘intimate’ time together it is not my only interest in him by far so I can live with out it for as long as he needs.  I don’t know what to do for him unless he tells me.  I can only hope he will tell me in time.

[DMOE]

I was doing a few things around the house having got hold of the movers to discover they have our furniture and we just need to arrange a time for them to drop it off when Brit returned home from a walk.  I gave him the good news and he asked me to try his costume from the Masked Ball on. He seemed to like how it looks but told me I was welcome to make something else with it to.  Although he did have a smile he didn’t seem quite his usual self. Maybe it is just the pressure of Dougal and the sudden news of the baby that is causing him stress.  It is a lot to take on board after all!
We walked into Hlint to go to the Craft Hall and ran into a few people.  Brit really didn’t want to talk to anyone.  We got the Craft Halland I set to doing what I needed too. Brit seemed to think one of the other crafters was avoiding him so decided to wait outside.  When I had finished I went out to find him talking to Master Argos who suggested a trip to Haven.  I thought we could take Elladan and Elhara and collect the head they need but Brit wasn’t sure we could do itwithout a healer.  Then he realised he needed to rest so suggested I go with Argos if I wish.  I didn’t wish so stayed in Hlint chatting.  Elladan ended up carrying Ranewin to the inn and tucking her in as she was so tired.  Angela has decided to change her name to Aikanaro .  I told her if this makes her happy it can only be a good thing and I hope I can still call here friend.  She said I could.  I will keep an eye on her just to be sure she is ok! Kai arrived being his usual self and decided to go on a hunt so a group of us including Elladan and Elhara went off with him.  We didn’t get very far as Elladan managed to get stuck behind a wall but it was fun!  After a while I need to return home and rest so left the rest of them to it!

[DMOE]

Was at home thinking of contacting the movers when Kai knocked on the door and invited me to hunt with him, Pendar and a few others.  I jumped at the chance.  Originally we were going to head for the Dragon Isle but ended up in the Berhagen Mountains where we fought those gem golems and giants.
Keaira’tynen appeared and told me my debt is paid as Dougal has been vanquished!  One of our travelling companions said he wasn’t sure it was a good thing but it is done now!  
Our baby is safe!!! We can relax and just concentrate on being parents!
Kai seemed to be confused by it all but if necessary I’ll explain all to him in small words at some point!  Not that i think he'll care nor should he to be fair.
Got back to Fort Velensk and the partystarted to split up.  Kai, Pendar and I headed for Fort Hope and the rest went their own ways.
I am so happy and I’m sure Brit will be when I tell him!

[DMOE]

Aikanaro invited me to the Dire caves but as I’d already agreed to meet Kai I gently refused.  Of course it turns out Kai was going as well and neither Akianaro or I realised this!  Ranwein, her love, Daren and Jill from earlier, Abi and a few others went also. They are a good group to adventure with and I enjoyed myself greatly!
It was an interesting trip I have never been to the Dragon Isles before nor have I been into such interesting places.  Well until I fell and was raised, then fell again and found myself back in Hlint.  I tried to head for the docks but nearly died again when Griffins attacked me so decided to wait in Port Hampshire until I felt better recovered.
I was sat watching the water in the fountain in a world of my own when Kai and another man walked up. Kai need to sort out a weapon for the man and asked me if fancied the walk.  I couldn’t see why not.  We returned to Kai’s house and I waited downstairs while he completed the business he needed to.
While he was upstairs I decided I needed to talk to Kai as he has been making a lot of comments recently about wanting me and I thought we had sorted this out and agreed to be friends and nothing more.  He told me he could cope with that but I’m having my doubts and don’t need this pressure from a friend!
When the other gentleman had left I came right out with it and asked Kai why he wants me.  He gave me his reasons and I suppose as reason’s go for wanting a woman they are good.  I then tried to explain that he only wants me because he can’t have but his is adamant that he wants me and would touch no other if he had me.  I told him I am Brit’s over and over again but as far as Kai is concerned Brit is not the man for me Kai is.  I kept trying to explain that while Brit is different to Kai and does things in different ways this does not mean he doesn’t make me happy.  I tried to explain how Brit does make me happy but all Kai could say is that he would make me happier.  I did get Kai to admit that it was when I asked him to be just my friend he realised he couldn’t be only my friend and I tried to explain this is what I’d been talking about earlier.  People always want what they can’t have and never want it when they’ve got it!  He just kept telling me over and over how we’d be so good together.  I tried to point out that he is engaged but I got the impression that’s not going anywhere anyway so that didn’t help!
He claimed I get aroused every time I touch him and that’s why I hardly ever touch him.  I don’t get aroused every time I touch him but I do fear to touch him and by that I mean hugs and kisses on the cheek as I would to say Pendar for fear of what he’d try to turn it into!  I suppose I do occasionally get aroused by him but at the end of the day he is a good looking man but the point is I don’t do or say anything about it because it’s Brit I love!
He tried to say it is my inexperience which makes me happy with Brit and if I knew more of the world I wouldn’t be happy with Brit.  Why can’t he see I like the simple life?
He just kept talking and talking about how we should be together and how he doesn’t lie and how yes he would flirt because it is his way but he wouldn’t touch another.  I tried to explain how jealous I get and all he could say is that I’d learn to get used to it because I’d know it was just talk.
I explained I am with child and that has a lot of responsibilities but he couldn’t take it seriously or understand what that meant which is part of what I’ve been try to say to him!  He likes the idea of me but I’m not so sure he’d like the reality.
Eventually I asked him if he wished me to break my word and dishonour myself by leaving Brit for him. It was the only thing I could think of to say by then!  He had tied my mind in knots!  He told me he can wait for Brit to go to the Soul Mother if he has to and tried to get me to promise that if Brit died I would be his.  I refused of course!  I am with my husband because I love him not out of duty but Kai seems to be able to understand duty better than my love so it is what I used.
He asked me to test him so he could prove that he would keep his word but I would not.  Not in the way he wished anyway.
I asked him not to push and he informed me he hadn’t even begun to push.  I pleaded with him not to.  In fact I made him promise to not push and just be my friend.  I also told him I expect him to keep his promise!  He said he would and asked me to promise to love him and accept him the way he is.  I told him I do love him and accept him already as a friend so I can do that. He told me he would expect me to keep that promise also.  I have a horrible fear I may regret that promise more than my one to the Avatar!
I do not know what to think at the moment.  My head hurts.  I love Brit; it’s why I married him after all.  I am carrying his child and that makes me so happy, scared as well but mainly happy.  Brit is loving and caring, strong and dependable, a good man.  He makes me laugh and I feel cherished and so loved.  I also desire him greatly.
I enjoy having Kai as a friend.  He is a very different kind of man to Brit but that does not make him better!
All I can hope for is some new beauty to come along and take Kai’s eye away from me so we can return to being friends again!

[DMOE]

Ran into Brit on my way back home.  I gave him the good news although he didn’t seem that pleased!  We had a talk and he said he was just grumpy from sleeping on the couch.  We walked home together and make love in the pool before curling up in each others arms.
My head hurts still regarding Kai but at least I know how my husband feels about me!

[DMOE]

Managed to organise with the movers to get the furniture delivered so spent the afternoon with Brit organising it which of course meant we ended up testing the bed out just to make sure it was ok after the move!
Brit went out and we agreed to meet up later.  I sorted the house out a bit more and went into Hlint.  I ran into Sy in the craft hall and gave her the good news about Dougal and the debt.  She told me about the new woman in her life and seems really happy!  I hope all goes well for her.
Brit came over while we were talking with some arrow making supplies for me and Sy had to leave.  I spent a happy few hours with my husband making arrows and collecting things to make arrows.
He did give me nearly a full box of magic gems which Mith had given him to pass on and did admit that me getting presents off other men makes him slightly jealous.  I can understand that so I won’t mention getting gifts unless he say asks me where I got something from although to be fair I don’t get that many gifts anyway.
Brit reminded me it has been four months since I discovered I am pregnant and asked if I have any idea of how much elven blood the baby has.  I honestly don’t know what is happening with the baby other than I am eating like a horse!
I haven’t seen Kai since our talk and the break is doing me good.  Also with Brit back to his normal self it makes it easier to remember what it is I love about him.  I ache to tell him what Kai said but I know it would just cause too many problems. He might try and attack Kai or he might try to demand I don’t see Kai and as I firmly believe that Kai just needs time to fall in lust with the next pretty girl it would help no one.  I don’t know why Kai ties my head in knots. I think I might talk to Elladan about it as I need to talk to someone or I’m just going to explode!

[DMOE]

I went to the Aeridin Temple in Rangers Vale to see if I could find Elladan to talk and thankfully I did!
I explained that Kai claims to have feelings for me and aims to have me as his.  This took a long while in a conversation peppered with many questions.  Elladan was very helpful though.  He made me realise that I have to put myself first in this and not lie to myself.  That I need to work out what I feel for whom.
I know I love Brit and I care for Kai.  I also know that there is a big difference between the two. I’m not even sure there is a choice to make.  That’s part of the problem.  I don’t know how I truly feel about Kai and in a sense I’m frightened to find out.  I will work out my feelings and my confusion but it was good to talk it over with Elladan!