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Author Topic: Monsters you WON'T be seeing in Layo anytime soon...  (Read 329 times)

LightlyFrosted

Monsters you WON'T be seeing in Layo anytime soon...
« on: September 02, 2008, 11:29:07 am »
After I posted some spells that got cut from Bioware's Neverwinter Nights to the amusement of some, my source on all things nixed by the Bioware execs mysteriously dried up.  Recently, it's been in contact again, so here are a few monsters you won't be seeing anytime soon...

1.  Garden Slaad:  Made up principally of lettuce, this extra-planar creature was cut from Hordes of the Underdark due to some complaints that the magical item 'Decanter of Ranch Dressing' had also been cut.

2.  Dire LOLcat:  Remarkably prescient about how irritating the meme was going to be, Bioware pulled the plug on this monster concept after it got stuck on 'I Can Has Critical Hitz?"

3.  Plutonium Dragon:  The most powerful possible metallic dragon, it's a pity that this monster got pulled.  I'm sure it would have been the basis for some new, clear adventures...

4.  Heckhounds:  Like hellhounds, but less so.

5.  Grassy Gnolls:  A truly deadly foe, capable of ranged sneak attacks, these creatures were the bane of elected officials everywhere.  Bioware yanked them because the conspiracy theorists saw it coming.

6.  Ketchup Golem:  Easy to slay (particularly with +5 french fries of deliciousness), but you can never get the stain out if it hits you.

7.  Snake Elementals:  An elemental plane of snakes?  Snakes on a plane!  Bioware just couldn't get Samuel L. Jackson to record the monster's sound-bites cheaply, and the cost just addered up.

8.  Abominable Sno-Cones:  'Yeti' had already taken up the slot of 'irritating winter-terrain creature', and taking these beasts into warmer climates meant that they melted all down your hand into a sticky mess.  Sno cone?  Sno way.

9.  Groper:  A variation on the traditional D&D monster the 'Roper', this one just goosed adventurers as they walked by.  It was abandoned for being 'More creepy than frightening.'

10.  Bacardi 151 (tm) Zombie:  About the only type of zombie that Bioware FAILED to include, this was pulled from the pallet after it was discovered that the people 'designing' them had been spending the budgeted money on drinking them instead.
 
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Alatriel

Re: Monsters you WON'T be seeing in Layo anytime soon...
« Reply #1 on: September 02, 2008, 12:27:30 pm »
hehe.. cute
 

miltonyorkcastle

Re: Monsters you WON'T be seeing in Layo anytime soon...
« Reply #2 on: September 02, 2008, 02:44:56 pm »
.... you get that from somewhere or just find some random spare time? and yeah, pretty funny, actually.
 

LightlyFrosted

Re: Monsters you WON'T be seeing in Layo anytime soon...
« Reply #3 on: September 02, 2008, 05:15:16 pm »
Found some random spare time.  *Chuckle* Otherwise I'd cite my sources.
 

 

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