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Author Topic: Scale and Claw  (Read 369 times)

Eorendil

Scale and Claw
« on: April 14, 2006, 12:32:49 pm »
Its been some months since I arrived here in Hlint and I will try to do that time justice, even though I begin these journals far later than I should have.      To start.. my life must have been far more sheltered than I suspected.  While I knew of Blood and his generals it seems that calamity has a target and that target's name is Hlint.  I've not seen such a humble place so wrought with trouble from demons to criminals, monstrous hordes to the holy and unholy.  It has me quite perplexed but I suspect that much of it has to do with the dragon... Yes.. everyone here has been summoned by a dragon because they are special.. or a hero... In this place my skills are meager but they grow every day.  I am overwhelmed with the scope and breadth of the peril our world is in.. unsure that my contribution may make a difference...  I digress.. Much of the reason I believe Hlint to be a target is because of all these heroes being summoned or gathered in one location..  There are even... Pyrtechon followers in our midst.. I would have thought the dragon that summoned us might have been, in some fashion, connected to Rofirein but I can not see him ever bringing a follower of Pyrtechon... *lots of scratches on the paper*     I have a few people of my faith here... Shae and Jenarra are also warriors blessed by Rofirein.  Meth is the only one of the Clergy I have seen besides those within the temple in Valensk.  I'm feeling a bit disconnected from the church here.  Many times I do not see others of the faith for days or weeks on end unless I venture to Valensk.  That is most troubling.  But, I continue to carry out my duty, protecting and defending those that have need of me.  I carry, always, my great hammer with its dedication to Rofirein inscribed on both heads.  Though.. I see the looks of my fellows.  It is almost doctrine that those carrying out his work use swords.. often referred to as the claw, of Rofirein.      Sometimes I wonder; what purpose I am to serve?  The vision I had that led me to using my hammer and Rofirein's blessing me with the abilities of his holy order of warriors is curious.  My faith is unwavering.  Still... I am moved to research and pray for answers.. Were there any others in his service so blessed that held such a devotion that set them apart from his other followers?  I do not know.  I hope that, in time, Rofirein will grant me the wisdom to answer this question for myself so that I may serve him even better.  It was a welcome surprise to see the clergy's stunned looks when I returned with my vision and demonstrated the abilities of a freshly anointed paladin.  I will never forget that day.  The honor filled me with such courage and sureness I thought I would burst.    I have seen a great many people.. a man with wings.. the legendary Ozymandius...  It is truly overwhelming.  I even had a bit of a verbal tussle with him though it did not amount to much more than a slap.  As I walked through Hlint I overheard him saying something to the effect that the dragons and their gods had once ruled over Layonara like Tyrants and that if Blood left we might see their return and the return of slavery to the races.. I mistook this as a statement that he believed Rofirein's followers were duped somehow but he asked me what I believed and I told him that I believed in Order, in Protecting the Innocent, the truth of my word and Justice...   He merely smiled and said that I was no dupe.  A great number of things happened that day and much of the rest escapes me.    Dalia was there... Oh, now there is a shining example of a Toranite.  Her compassion and wisdom shine through where others seem to pale.  I have met several Toranites from this land and few are better than automatons that wander about thrashing anything alien and spouting the word of Toran from a dead tongue.  Dalia is different.  She has experienced a great deal of pain in her life and she has learned from it.  I hope that she continues to honor me with her presence in the future just as Miss Lee has..     AnnaLee...  Never have I come to know a more vibrant, caring and trustworthy creature.  She wears her heart on her sleeve.  A fact that, I'm afraid, may cause her hurt in these parts.  Many of those that wander this path just aren't worthy of the devotion and warmth that I'm sure she is capable of.  It was not long ago that she told me she was leaving for the Forrest of Myst.. the grief on her face was apparent.  Fortunately, she has returned but I haven't the chance to speak with her on any topic.  I swear, by Rofirein's CLAW!  Should anyone cause this wonderful creature harm I will not allow them to forget their transgressions.    On the topic of Transgressions I had the opportunity to assist in the apprehension of a wicked man a few months ago.  A crude devil he was.. Rollie, a very pleasant and benevolent fellow attempted to speak with him... but so far past redemption was this monster that he openly laughed when he admitted the atrocities that he had visited on people.  I'm not sure who took the first strike but he fell and was dead quite fast.  Proof of his death was returned to the Mistone Ministry of Justice.. It was on that trip I met Honora, a half orc lady with a very impressive code of honor..     A few weeks ago I aided in the defense of Hlint against a horde of creatures: Ogres, kobolds, gnolls and more.  My new hammer, fashioned by the Raven Trading Company and engraved with Rofirein's symbol helped hold the line that day.  It was an amazing battle.  The markings of Rofirein were left, embedded into many of the creatures.. a sign to all of the justice that awaits such wickedness.  I would rather leave that sign on the tactician's forehead. though.  How anyone can tolerate a philandering general is beyond me.  The man we had to seek out and return to Spellguard in order to confront the hordes was in Valensk... SHOPPING.. I've since come to know that that word means that he was looking for women to seduce and pull into his bed.  The man has no honor as he even seduced the wife of Salles.. the barkeep in the Inn in Port Hampshire.  I swore to Salles and this.. Lolpan *ugly face drawn here* that he was lucky we needed him so... Of course, Salles' wife is equally responsible but this man obviously had no interest in whether the women he chased were oathed to another or not.  His crime is doubly wicked.  A flagrant disregard for the oaths of marriage... repeatedly.  I'm curious just how many he has done this to... perhaps I should pursue it...     It was right after that that a Demon.. some Kea.. showed up in town.  I hear tale she is Ozymandius' fiancée.. Who knows?  It wouldn't surprise me.  The reaction of some of the other so-called heroes disgusts me.  A demon.. guardian of a plane.. shows up in town and they try and challenge her?  In response she released a Bator in town and they're all very lucky no innocents got hurt.  Reckless.. just reckless, which brings me to another problem... back to Toranites.  Maev and a fellow Toranite claimed that the demon's showing must be fate and that they were sworn destroy it.. Foolish.  They said it was fate.  I'll tell you a thing or two about fate.  Even I believe in fate.. but they speak of it as if the tides of fate determine the every move of a fly.. not to mention Toran's divine blessings and how he would not put them in a place to fight evil if they were not supposed to... Blind fools.  They lack judgment.  Even I know that Rofirein has blessed me with my abilities because he calls me to a higher purpose but were I to act foolishly he would not intervene on my behalf.  It is not a god's way.  Foolishness carves its own price.. Good judgment and wisdom in pursuing the will of the one you follow will always win out over thoughtless actions in their name.  It burns my blood simply thinking of it but they are entitled to their opinion, as I am mine.  I have faith that Rofirein will let me know if he feels I am wrong.
    I’ve been thinking.. there is a treatise on the Claw of Rofirein…. Perhaps with meditation I could reflect and draw inspiration for the Tail as well.. for more and more lately that is how I view my weapon, blunt and brutal sometimes but swift and great.  I shall ponder on it more later..    Again I digress.. it seems that many of Blood's generals are worn down.. but there is something else dark and sinister creeping about these days and I've heard references to a Halfling and his horses but all of those whom I have approached seem unable or unwilling to share information and I know that Miss Lee and Lady Ireth are somehow involved... By the CLAW! I'm disturbed.  I don't know what's worse.. not knowing or a bunch of elite snobs that feel this is theirs to burden alone.  I swore to help protect this place and its people and I'm going to do just that, even if I have to knock this hammer aside a few heads!  What’s more I refuse to allow these two outstanding individuals come to no good end...     My rounds in keeping the accursed crypts free of roaming undead shall just have to wait....
- Caighd Brendimeere
May his wings shelter and keep you, his eye watch over you, his claw strike down the wicked and his tail protect you from harm.
 

Eorendil

RE: A Journal titled: "Tail of a chosen warrior"
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2006, 01:41:37 pm »
Well.. I have found out from Miss Rhynn, recently, what this whole ordeal is about and I offered myself to aid Miss Lee and her troup in any way possible.  I'm afraid, though, that she was very focused on the task at hand.  I offer my counsel and my ear, my hammer and my life in service to protect the innocent.  In this case, these fine people and the strange horses that are now bound to their souls.  I know they appreciate the offer but I am, yet again, left feeling somewhat useless.  I could not go with them on their planar travels as I would have only been a burden... I hope Rofirein's eye is watchin over them as they journey.
  Miss Lee is a sharp one.. wish I were half as gifted as she.   This blasted treatise I'm working on is still floating around in my head.  I'm sure Miss Lee could put it to words but I don't think she can reach into my skull.  It will take me time.
  More on fate.. Maev and her friend still go on about fate and how it rules and determins everyone's lives.. When I was speaking with Rhynn I had an insight into my thoughts on Fate.. I have refined it a bit more since then.  Darn fools and fate.. it astounds me.
  Fate is like a mining pick.  It hews large, rough pieces from the stone of.. well, everything.  It does not take interest in details.  I speculate that sometimes this is why a greater tyrant replaces lesser tyrants if dethroned... Just an idea.  It is up to individuals, good or bad.. deific or mortal to take up the gem cutter's chisel and carve out the details for in those details is where an individual's life is decided, not in the greater cut.  Furthermore, there is only true failure if the individual refuses to take up that chisel and relies completely in the greater cut.  We are not helpless puppets.  I chose Rofirein and in return, for his own reasons, he chose me.  I shall serve him to the best of my ability because I believe.
  -Caighd Brendimeere
 

Eorendil

RE: A Journal titled: "Tail of a chosen warrior"
« Reply #2 on: May 08, 2006, 08:42:59 am »
Oh, how things go so wrong sometimes...
    In an effort to assist the Hearth brothers and Johan the crafts master I have shown my own weakness.  As we gathered pelts we ran across Miss Lee and Mith in the High Forrest.  One of the two asked us what we were there for and I spoke of Bears and Johan's need.  I knew it would pain my dear friend but I found I could not swallow the words before they left my mouth... I simply could not.  I wish I could have for My dearest friend's heart sinks, I know.  
    She, herself, has told me that this is the natural order of things... Living and dying... and I know not to take too much from nature.  Even in nature there are laws... much like those of the Lord Protector.  
    She had entered the Sielwood caves with me earlier in the day and I simply could not ask any more of her but Mith... I see his true nature now and it saddens me.  Though it is obvious his love for Miss Lee is strong it can not excuse the rest.  He seeks to protect her and I have respect for that.  Regardless, words were exchanged and the anger in Mith's voice was apparent as soon as Miss Lee winced in hearing our intentions.  He might as well have been threatening us... and as I tried to reason with him, assuring him that none of the creature would be wasted, since I planned to donate the meat and other products to the Freelancer for their drive, he said three words... three words that drive in me such anger as can not be described.  "I don't care" Never will you hear me issue such a base and disgusting phrase.     Law and protection are always balanced with mercy and compassion.  I DON'T CARE! *circled several times and underlined* This is the phrase issued by tyrants and cutthroats, mercenaries and deviants.  People hunger and people die because someone simply does not care.  Hearts are twisted and minds worn away under the empty power of those three words that I simply can not tolerate.
    So, I am both ashamed at my display and deeply saddened for I can not bring myself to seek out my dear friend Lee and apologize.  I do not wish to see that dark creature again... He is a selfish creature, save perhaps when it comes to Miss Lee but even there I can not be for certain and any assistance he might ever lend me I can no longer conscience because I know it would only be for Miss Lee's benefit.  For her sake I shall hold my tongue.  She loves that creature and hers is a heart that has seen much pain.  I will not bring more upon her with my words and since I can not be trusted to bite my own tongue I must make certain I am never given the chance.     I'm so sorry Miss Lee... so terribly sorry... *large, bucket-sized tears stain the page* I wish you love and happiness...
    So enraged was I at myself and Mith's words that on my way from the forest I swung my hammer in a wide arch... and left its imprint on a tree.   Some justice...  I have used my hammer in vain and gone against my oath but I guess a kind of justice was served for the forest claimed me that day, not once but twice.  I feel... lessened, like a part of me is missing.  In meditation I searched my thoughts and feelings but could not put my finger on it.  There is an emptiness... small, but its there.  And strangely... I dreamt... dreamt of walking the streets of Hlint as a young child.  Very strange indeed, almost as strange as my lack of appetite....
    I beg your forgiveness Lord Protector...
    *written innumerable times in the margins, at the head and the foot of the page* I'm sorry Miss Lee
    //A few things I failed to mention about Caighd in his character submission: 1) He has a monstrous appetite because his metabolism is so high.  He could sit next to a half giant or an ogre and almost eat them under table...  2) He's not just truthful... he's compulsively honest, to a fault.  He can not lie or even withhold the truth.  3) ... well... we'll let that be a surprise.
 

Eorendil

The color red
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2006, 06:59:36 am »
I wake up in the morning and the only thing that brings focus to my thoughts are my exercises.. my weapon training.  That, and the thought of battle...  When not fighting I feel somehow empty but when I am fighting a frightening anger fills that void.  I have found myself, occasionally, continuing my assault even when my enemy no longer moves.  And in the back of my mind all I hear is,
  "I don't care."
  I could speak with Miss Lee but I fear she would wish me to make a sort of peace with Mith as well.  It can't happen.  I could not trust that anything he says wasn't simply for Miss Lee's benefit.  I will not cause my dear friend harm.
  "I don't care"
  Ketilbjorn came and enlisted me into a small band of adventurers.. a halfing, myself, Keti, Tegan and a man named Remi or some such... and some man with a malicious and annoying sense of humor.  I really wished to have my hand around his throat, Rofirein save me...
  "I don't care"
  We marched from Hlint, deep through the Sielwood and, before I realized it, Remi and Keti lead us straight through the center of the Broken Forest.. I'm not sure how I could have mistaken our direction or where we were but, once again, the forest claimed me.  
  "I don't care"
  The waters of the fishing pond in Hlint are so peaceful.  I like to practice there.  Occasionally I peer over at the man I see in the calm waters and he stares back at me.  Who is he, I wonder....
  "I don't care"
  Lord Protector give me strength.
  "I don't care"
  -Caighd
 

Eorendil

Making peace
« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2006, 07:49:22 am »
Its been over a month... I've spent countless hours in meditation attempting to make peace with that part of me and those three words but I can not abide them...  They are a poison, often a lie told in an attempt to avoid something that is painfull.  However, I am much calmer now and my shame is lessened.  
  A couple weeks ago I ran into Miss Lee while walking through Hlint and took the opportunity to apologize.  Her heart does her great service, forgiving and calling a man friend who very nearly threatened her loved one.  She understood and it was all I could do to hold back the tears that sprung from my heart.
  Today, as I passed through town I saw a small crowd gathered by the road and as I approached I recognized Miss Lee, Jennara and one other lady.. Jenerra beckoned me to come sit.  She was telling the tragic story of the people's of Roldem.  Lord help them all.  Were it not for Lady Jennara's works they might all be forgotten and swept beneath the rug in their time of need.
  Jennara has set up a drive for donation of items and supplies for the people of Roldem so that their suffering may be lessened while they rebuild.  The numbers of items that she seeks is no small thing and I fear it may be too much even for the heroes gathered in this place but I continue to gather what I can for her cause.  To her credit she has already amassed considerable amounts of supplies.  I want to do more, though.  My crafting skills are weak and I was no more than an apprentice in my father's blacksmith shop.  Jennera spoke of reclaiming the farmland.  Now, that's a job for me.  I've no fear of hard labor, breaking rocks, tilling the earth.. It strengthens the spirit.  Perhaps I can be of some help to the people in that regard.. or, atleast, I hope I might be.  I shall speak more to Jennara...
  It seems that no day in Hlint is complete without some amount of tragedy.  Miss Lee's love, Mith, returned from another mission.  He and others have destroyed a blood pool, but at a price.  Many have lost a part of themselve, falling in battle so close to it.  Mith is counted among them and his spirit grows tired because between the pools and the soulmother he has only a tenuous sliver securing him to this world.  Worse yet, in speaking with him I have learned he is without faith and believes that, were he to die, his spirit would be cast into the void.  So.. I made my peace with him in a way.  Despite our differences I would lay down my life to keep him from jeopardy.  The pain his passing would cause Miss Lee I can not even begin to imagine.  I pray that The Lord's wings shelter and protect him and Miss Lee...
  Strangely.. Miss Lee has seemed unusual as of late; not in a bad way.  There's something different about her; something that is very familiar to me.  It floats in the back of my mind and occasionally my thoughts drift to my own mother but why they would do that I have no idea...  I'm glad she's acquired a taste for Rhubarb pie though.  A man could fuel a battle on a good bit of Rhubarb pie, though a tall glass of milk goes a long way in washing it down.  Oh, and chips... chips and fish.  I'd hold back blood himself for fresh chips and fish.
  I'm hungry. I wonder what the kitchen at the Surge has prepared today. I could eat griffon.
  -Caighd
  *scratched at the bottom of the page, erased many times and rewritten*
  The tail of a dragon.. When defending a dragon's tail is always in motion, much like the style of fighting I use when wielding my hammer.  Never do I allow it to stop.  It circles and swings, dips, connects with the foe and continues on always attempting to keep the force it holds in motion.  A dragon's tail.... nearly always in motion...  protection for its back and other weapons.. a weapon in its own rite....
 

Eorendil

RE: Making peace
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2006, 01:23:54 pm »
Where to begin.... its been a while...
  Those poor folks in Roldem.  I'm afraid Miss Jennara is very sad.  The alliance has pulled their support of her relief actions and as people go about their lives she dedicates almost every waking moment to the cause.  Supplies continue to come in but usually only in small amounts.  I only wish I could do more... My own crafting skills are meager but I will lend my time and my back in hard work and devotion at a moment's notice.  I have pledged as much to both Miss Lee and Miss Jennara but they need so much more.  If we are to ship in the relief supplies we will need people guarding every step of the road to Roldem... Our brothers and sisters in faith should step up to this task and I intend to ask Geldar as well.  Our two faiths work so closely in so many things, surely they will be willing.. and perhaps the followers of Aeridin... We need strong, trustworthy people.  There are many items that will surely tempt those of lesser resolve...  
  So many tragedies... There is a price on my head, set by a man i know only as Christian.  He is a noble of Fort Hope, or so i have been led to believe and at his request many of us came together.  After listening to the man it seemed that his request for assistance in winning the Lady Sussanah's hand was neither noble or honorable.  Geldar, I and others agreed that it seemed like he was after something besides the lady's love or her money.. several times his tongue slipped, revealing what I think to be contempt for her.  When we questioned him he became agitated and dropped a pouch of coin. Caldir, a hooded dark elf, scooped up the purse.  
  After traveling to Port Hampshire we tracked down Lady Susannah.  There's such a lot of us that Miss Lee and a few others decided to see her audience rather than intimidate her or her family.  Seems that Sussanah is being made to marry by her father but he allowed her to choose tasks for her suitors... What a troublesome arrangement.. but it has keep them at bay thus far.  She's really in love with a man named Stuart.  He has no noble ties and thus her father wishes nothing to do with him but she sent us after him.  He lives in Fort Hope too.
  When we arrived he threatened us but Caldir had long since disappeared with the coin.  He wanted the coin or the three objects Lady Sussanah requested and when we refused he rode off.  Absurd.. he claimed we had a contract because that thieving little dark elf scooped up his coin.  
  We went to the Inn in an attempt to find Stuart.  Everyone was trying to talk at once.. Rhynn and half a dozen others it seemed, offering money to the Inn keeper... It was more than I could take.  Truth is not something to be purchased with coin.  So, I stepped outside and after a time Geldar stepped out.  I'm not sure what he was looking for but I followed him.  Christian has told us to watch our backs and I took his threat to heart, pairing up with Geldar and watching for something as we wandered the streets.  It was as we neared the tents that we were fired on.  We were able to spot our assailant and we tried to run the man down but he disappeared between two other tents.  So, we returned to the Inn and I resumed my post outside but not long after Geldar left I was pierced by a poison bolt.  I made my assailant, silhoueted on a nearby hill.  It was all I could do to stumble inside before I fell to the floor.
  After a time, I can't say how long, my thoughts cleared and I awoke to Rhynn, Miss Lee and several others standing over me.  The bolt was out of my chest and the poison waning.  I still felt weak and with Geldar and Miss Lee's help I stumbled into an inn room, stripped the plate armor off and colapsed on a bed that was far too small.... it didn't matter.
  When I came to I guess this Stuart fellow was in the tavern.  We were worried that Christian might take after him too so I took a seat close to the door and kept a close watch on things.  From there I do not know what happened but that Geldar said he agreed to meet us at the far corner of the pond in ten minutes.  Several times on our way were were attacked by more assassins and as we waited there at the pond I saw a dark figure casting not far away.  Miss Lee and another were closer to the figure than I so I ran as hard as I could, knowing that they were in danger.  I got a good enough look.  It was a female dark elf.. but that's all I got as I was engulfed with darkness.. stabbing pain struck me in the throat and the world fell away.
  Some time after that I awoke. Alleina pulled me back from death... After I fell the dark elf must have left having lost the element of surprise.  While Geldar and the others spoke with Stuart of what we should do I meditated and worked to regain my strength.  We were ambushed several more times as we made our way to Port Hampshire but when we got there the Savannah's father had left..
  I'm tired.  Hope Miss Lee and Jenarra know they can count on me... Miss Rhynn and Treana too.. had a nice talk with Treana about faith and destiny and such.  It was real nice to talk to someone who thinks for themselves..  
  There's more.. I just need a bit of rest now
 

Eorendil

The long and short of it...
« Reply #6 on: June 15, 2006, 09:27:44 am »
Bear with me.. for I've waited too long to write within these pages and catching up past events is difficult. Even now the details blur somewhat... as memories are want to do.
  We waited for Sussanah's father to return home... goblins slaughtered... ogres scared from the grey peaks... people, literally scared to death by some unknown assailant and a mysterious grave marker that Miss Lee and Miss Rhynn touched. It made them feel sorrow and betrayal... From the Quartermaster, whos has a somewhat odd fascination with grave markers we learned that this marker was placed where it is now, some fifty years ago. It was reused.. I can not imagine why nor can I understand it.. seems such an irreverant action to take the stone from another's grave.
  Both Miss Rhynn and Miss Lee have copies of the inscription, as far as we've been able to discern it.. L.A.P.A.T.... I think.. and there's a poem. At Elladan's suggestion I took Miss Lee to both the Rofirein temple in Velensk and The Citadel in Pranzis to research and see if the stone was moved from somewhere else. The scribes are very thorough in its records and while I could research it myself I feel Miss Lee's talent for finding things among piles of books and parchment is far greater than mine will ever be. I'm just a protector.
  I must remember to apologize to Master Shale next time I see him.. there's a lady cleric of Mist that joined us. She seemed quite keen on telling Geldar and I how we are supposed to act as paladins and I fear my comments to her might have been insulting to Master Shale. While I would rather her tongue be stilled permanently I am afraid she might be right.. to a point. Unable to see Miss Lee because Miss Rhynn shrouded her from sight I rushed ahead, following the one called Coin who insisted the party that ventured into the Grey Peaks was in dire trouble.. The lady cleric and Miss Lee were attacked by a vicious skeleton.. stronger than those of the Hlint Crypts. From here on the coaxing and encouragements of others to rush to the rescue shall fall on deaf ears so long as I have others under my charge. It will not happen again.
  The other party was indeed in dire trouble but we were able to bring them back.. though, I was not sure how this was done. I was too busy watching for an attack.. a great and sinister fog stretched out through that area of the peaks. On our return trip Miss Lee, Geldar and I ran into an odd Ogre.. he was so afraid he did not attack us. He simply ran away and much faster than we could ever follow.
  An entertaining thought.. I wonder what scalding remarks that cleric would have if I managed to save her life.. Best not to dwell on it. There are none, save the followers of Pyrtechon, for whom I would not give my life in the line of duty and... under the right circumstances... Forget it. I dare not even consider what those might be.
  I miss Dalia.. I have many I call friend, Miss Lee most of all. Treana is a welcome additionn amongst them. She is a considerate and wise lady. Miss Jennara is among the wisest and most kind people I know. Still, Miss Dalia would seek me out to talk or to lay the undead to rest..... no matter.
  I suppose I shall be assisting with the training of the Militia in Roldem as well as clearing and helping to rebuild homes. Master Cole was going to take up that task but the Soulmother has taken him for good. I am impatient to begin my work there. I'm tired of sitting in Hlint, waiting.. Before I go, though, I will double my efforts to enforce the need for donations to the Roldem cause. It is a time for action.
 

Eorendil

RE: The long and short of it...
« Reply #7 on: June 16, 2006, 08:37:29 am »
I recently met Storold, a Lucindite I believe, and a lady named Nyyana as we attempted to assist another lady by the name of Malamilaa.. Mala. That's what she told me to call her. Her name is much longer and as with many Elven names it has a beautiful ring to it, at least when she speaks it. I butcher it horribly, I'm sure.
  The four of us traveled into the Grey peaks towards a Village I think is named Lars... I've never successfully made it that far I'm afraid and this time would be no different.  The ogres ambushed us quite unexpectedly and as soon as Mala, an Aeridin sorceress, and Nyyana began casting the brutes could not be distracted from their pursuit. I was able to heal Mala once, laying upon her the healing touch that Rofirein has given me but the Ogres wasted no time and knocked her flat. It was only a few moments after that that Nyyana fell and then I was overwhelmed.
  I awoke in the Rofirein temple in Velensk only to see Nyyana. We greeted one another and talked for only a short time before she needed to rest. I then made my way back to Hlint.. a long trip for someone in my condition. It seems that Miss Mala was left for dead and escaped from the ogres of the valley. So, with her magics, she helped me return to the valley, shrouded from sight to pray at the spot where I fell. After that we made a hasty retreat back to the road outside of Fort Llast where, in my debt, I asked if there were anything she needed assistance with and there was indeed.
  She needed to collect a bounty on goblin ears as well as seeking out lost treasures within the Seilwood caves and so we went. The kobolds and goblins were out in force that day and I collected a great deal of stolen coin from the corpses. Miss Mala's animal friend Aeri is an amazing creature and listens Once, when the battlefield within the caves lay quiet and I was hurrying to gather everything.
  Having seen my harried rush she too gathered what she could and presented it to me when I was finished. I'm not sure if it was just me or if her mind wandered or.. but we stood there for what seemed like forever and those blue eyes felt like they were looking directly into my soul. Don't get me wrong, she is very pleasing to the eye. She's also an Elf. Mom used to say something about Elves bewitching men's souls but I don't know. She hasn't cast any spells on me.... not that I know of. It was just a very uneasy moment... but in a nice way. I don't know.
  Its easier being different when you're alone. Sometimes I'd give anything to be the size of Geldar or Master Elladan or even Miss Jennara if it came right down to it. Being big has its good side, I guess, but you just don't fit in. The world looks at you different and things are more... complicated. Sometimes its like being alone... with everyone around.
 

Eorendil

Watching and waiting....
« Reply #8 on: June 20, 2006, 07:39:51 am »
I pen this entry having had little sleep so bear with me...
  I don't think I've ever seen Miss Lee in such a state... even during the trouble with Pandemonium.. She falters and trips over almost every word that issues from her mouth.  It was obvious when she came to ask my assistance that she had not slept well.. My heart goes out to her for whatever she is dealing with weighs heavily upon her.. So terribly heavy is her burden that it can be seen upon her face and the way she stands.  As a friend she knows that I would gladly help bear any burden but that decision is hers and hers alone to make.  For now I stand, hand out as it were, ready to lend her my strength.  She's strong willed, that one, and proud but even the strongest timbers can buckle under too much weight.
  So, after handing her a bit of cloth for her tear, a reassuring hug and vowing to protect her angels I gladly took the bit of pie she offered me as payment if for no other reason than because it lightened her mood for a moment or two. I set about guarding and patroling the the outside of Ilsare's temple.  Rofirein help me.. Miss Lee and others have freed many angels.. but a few of them paid an incredible price.  I had a glance or two at the poor things and can not describe the anger or sadness that filled my heart.. Lord Protector, guard their little souls and bring them back to Miss Lee.  That anyone could do this to children.. Miss Lee assured me that their assailants had met their end but I'd rather have seen them shackled and breaking stone.  For some death is too good.. Strengthen me Lord for who is more innocent and deserving of our protection than the little children..  
  I would have been in Roldem already and perhaps I would have bumped into Miss Jennara, Miss Lee and Miss Brisbane.  I do not know but Miss Lee caught me as I was getting ready to walk out the gates.
 

Eorendil

RE: Watching and waiting....
« Reply #9 on: June 22, 2006, 07:28:01 am »
There are a lot of different kind of rain.... and I think they all fall in North point.
  A few days ago Rawkwin came to the temple of Ilsare in Hlint to care for the children. With inadequate shelter he suggested moving them to North Point and Aeridin's temple. Nothing woke these poor fallen angels. Mith would have had some Golem carry the lot of them there but I protested. Even in their state they should be kept comfortable and I can not imagine a golem's touch to be very reassuring. So, I cradled two of them in my arms; Master Rawkwin, Miss Lee, Talen, myself and Mith took the portal directly to North point. However, Garent voiced his displeasure with the children's present, claiming it was not a nursery. I explained that it was an emergency and we were moving them.. I think that set his mind at ease.
  The trip was fast and we quickly found ourselves at Aeridin's temple, though I was left standing outside.. I am sworn to not enter temples unless they are that of my Lord's allies.. save for dire circumstances. Master Rawkwin soon returned to take the children with him and I stood there at the door, looking in for a time and feeling somewhat helpless.
  Not wishing to be rude I allowed the door to close and went about making myself familiar with this place.  There is definately a less civilized feel here.. The locals are brash and rough but they live, in what I hear is, a very demanding environment.
  Well, by the time I had checked around, Miss Lee and the others were coming out of the temple and told me that Winu had informed Rawkwin of a shipment of healing supplies that had gone missing on its way to Pranzis.. This, some artifact, a strange mage giving warnings and pirates... I'm not sure what to make of it all but if its all connected may The Lord Protector's tail guard out backs, his wings shelter us and the light from his golden eye guide us...
  Miss Lee and Mith made sure I was properly provisioned before they left.. though there is a bank and a decent inn here. I've no insight at the moment into Miss Lee's stuttering but its obvious that something's wrong. Her and Mith were both acting a bit odd.. but he's a Necromancer and I suppose that sort of thing comes naturally for him. I hope Miss Lee is alright.. and perhaps my being here will take a bit of that terrible load off her shoulders.
 

Eorendil

RE: Watching and waiting....
« Reply #10 on: June 22, 2006, 07:46:26 am »
Several days have passed... still no progress on the fallen angels but I am certain their spirits will return..
  Miss Lee comes and goes fairly often and its nice to see someone familiar occasionally. She's so busy with these and the others in Point Harbor.. I do not feel it fair to delay her with small talk.
  I spoke briefly with Miss Treana.. she was very sad when I mentioned the children but she's forgiven me my brief loss of composure during the dealing with Christian. I am glad to be rid of the guilt. I would sooner sever my hand from my body than cause harm to any of my friends...
  The rain falls at an odd angle today. The wind blows in odd gusts causing the fallen rain to pound into the walls of the temple at times.. The weather requires I keep good care of my armor.. strangely, I do not mind the drenching. It is cleansing. The rain almost sounds like music sometimes.. as it causes my armor to ring like a metal drum.
  I wish I could sing to the fallen angels the lullabies and songs my mother taught to me and those that I sang to my brothers and sisters as I helped.. I do what I can for these innocent creatures...
 

Eorendil

RE: Watching and waiting....
« Reply #11 on: June 22, 2006, 08:04:50 am »
An odd thing happened today.  The door to the temple opened briefly and then closed.  When I poked my head inside to ask Winu if anything was wrong she said an Elven healer had entered the temple and had gone to see the children.
  I paniced.  Miss Lee sent no word and Rawkwin hadn't mentioned anyone.  So, I ran into the temple, fearing the worst; that somhow the people that hurt them had tracked them here.  I stopped immediately just inside the room where they lay.  The Elf was chanting and blessing the children, checking their bandages and crying.  When I asked who he was he initially told me that he was the one who caused all this..  I was concerned and stepped a bit closer, ready to pull my hammer from its mount on my back.
  No.. he told me his name was Quillwen, healer of Berryl and leader of the Freelancers.  The worry slipped from my like so much spilled water and I apologized as he continued to tend to them.  Miss Lee speaks quite highly of him, though he, like Treana and Miss Lee seemed to blame themselves for what happened.  I know this to be natural but they've saved so many and even these fallen angels chose the risk rather than remain where they were.  Regardless, I explained that I need exit the place since there was no danger and later he came out to speak about the children.
  It seems I will have more friendly company here after all..  Master Quillwen spoke of the children and his regret for their condition and I spoke of my faith in him and Miss Lee and everything they have done.  I also pledged to help drive from Karthy the worms that seep through it like a poison.  He appeared to be pleased at this.  For now we both wait.  He will do what he can.. I do what I must, for these poor fallen angels and Miss Lee.  
  Haven't seen Miss Lee in almost a week... I hope everything is okay with the other children.  Perhaps I should send her a falcon.  No.. best not.  I'd hate to get her hopes up like that.  I told her I'd send her one as soon as the children wake.
 

Eorendil

Its a funny thing..
« Reply #12 on: June 23, 2006, 09:01:49 am »
I sit here.. or stand. Often I am standing or practicing here outside the temple. I've come to be on good terms with the guard that patrols here. He doesn't like the rain at all. He is bound by contract and duty. I am bound by... *scribbles and doodles..*  
  That's just it. I'm a protector, a defender. It's been in my soul for as long as I can remember, even as a child. And now I guard these children.. these children who sought to be free of a prison they were born into; a prison they never had a chance to escape from, until Miss Lee.
  She is such a generous and caring soul; it pains me deeply to think of her in the state she's in. I pray for her protection and guidance every night as well as those close to her. I pray for the poor fallen angels who lay motionless... Their wounds have long since left, thanks to the magic of the clerics.. their bodies drawing breath but their spirits seem trapped, unable to react, to cry, to laugh, to speak, to run or even blink in response to our presence. The poor fallen angels... for that is what they are.. They thought only of the safety of their rescuers. I can not begin to imagine how much courage and love is contained within these tiny vessels.. but then again.. that's Miss Lee.. Anna.. A humble woman, unable to see the light that shines from her own spirit, for everyone to see. These children saw it and I see it still... despite whatever is tearing her apart inside. Were it only the fate of these children.. I would know. There is something more.
   Everyone seems to think that they failed.. that somehow they are to blame. I hope this will pass when these fallen children wake.
  *places the pencil in the book, between his knees and sits just outside the door to the temple as it is open on this day to allow in the temperate breeze that brings fresh air. He looks up, his eyes welling, at the beautiful orange and reds of the soon to be twilight sky*
  *hums for a short time a soft tune, his deep voice sometime barely registering to the ears of those not listening*
  *sings in a that gentle but deep bass voice*
 
  "Sleep children and peace attend thee,   All through the night   Guardians and Gods will send thee,   All through the night   Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,   Hill and dale in slumber sleeping   I my loved ones' watch am keeping,   All through the night     Angels watching, e'er around thee,   All through the night   Midnight slumber close surround thee,   All through the night   Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,   Hill and dale in slumber sleeping   I my loved ones' watch am keeping,   All through the night
 
  *pauses a moment and smiles, still looking up at the sky*
 
  Caighd and Quill are here with thee
  And still beyond this night
  Anna's love will e'er surround thee
  Well beyond this night  Many hearts for you are feeling,    Prayers and wishes o'er you spilling    Gods and Healers please be willing,    To set this damage right."  
  *glistening lines run down his dark skin from his eyes, over his cheek and down to his chin as he stands in the twilight and quietly pulls the door shut* *as he turns around, gripping his journal it falls to the ground* "Oh.. A.. Miss Lee! I didn't hear you...."
 

Eorendil

On the road
« Reply #13 on: June 25, 2006, 07:28:48 pm »
Quick entry as I am on the roads.. There are still enemy forces scattered here and there.  We lost Pranzis.. the Citadel.. and many many lives as well.  A dwarf name Vakra had an ingenious idea.. to use explosives and to take out their leader.  If only he had shared his idea.. perhaps, with backup, a secondary individual to set blaze to the bag he had carried, it might have succeeded.  Treana fought like she was possessed of demons.. my hammer struck true time and again but still we were overwhelmed... we held for many days, and in the end we were allowed retreat to fight again.
  The skies are darkened with dust and cloud of the likes I have never seen and it is cooler than normal.  I fear this does not bode well.  Perhaps the other fronts were no more successfull than ours but we musn't give up hope.
  For now, I must run.. rest is a luxury that I must take in small doses and the areas I venture through are dangerous at best.  I continue on.  I must ensure this chaos has not spilled into North Point.  For the Children, for my brothers and sisters.. for Miss Lee.  
  Lord Protector, may your wings shelter and keep us, the light from your golden eye guide us, your tail guard us, your claw make our weapons to strike true...  Protect Miss Lee, the Children, Layonara and this humble warrior as I travel this dangerous path.
 

Eorendil

On the road
« Reply #14 on: June 27, 2006, 08:30:03 am »
Finally!  I have arrived in North Point.  Thank the Lord Protector.  The cold sea breeze is so refreshing to my soul.  There were times I doubted I would ever feel it again; times I doubted that I could continue.   My heart is greatly relieved as the Children and the area are still untouched, but for how long?  And this dreadful cloud cover... ever present.  Its positively freezing.  Were it not for the arduous pace I set for myself I might have noticed sooner but even now I am hot, soiled and soaked in my own sweat.  I am weary as well but time is always against us..
  If it continues to get colder this place will not be desirable for the children.  Mala and Meira have agreed to remain while I seek out Miss Lee.  I only hope that she is okay and that her own expedition did not end so horribly. I worry for her.. and of her.  Many things have become clearer during this trip and perhaps more complicated as well.  
  Hard work.  That's what my father would say.  There's nothing like good hard work to make you think clear, to clense you of conflict and turmoil.
 

Eorendil

The wolves among us...
« Reply #15 on: July 03, 2006, 09:11:34 am »
You would think that of all the devoted followers of the gods, Ilsare's would understand much more about love... much more about that which appears to be love but is twisted and warped... much more about the differences between devotion and obsession... between possession and cherishing... between desperation and faith... They meddle in others' lives only because they can, not thinking on if they should. They are fools, blind fools.. My poor Imogen, can they not learn from the past?  
  And it seems Miss Lee is in the middle of it all. Much happened in my absence and I fear much more will. My duties keep me too busy to be available as much as I'd like but we spent many hours catching up...
  The bone woman... Its all very strange and in the back of my mind I sense an immense task is at hand. I was nigh useless when the horses of pandemonium were choosing their riders and again I fear something beyond my ability darkens the paths of my friends. I will try and be there, no matter the task. Miss Lee trusts me.
  And Mith... there is little to be said. I had only a slight inkling, only a small glimpse. Unfortunately, my impressions back then are now verified.
  I'm sorry Miss Lee.. sorry that I was not here.. sorry that he proved me right...
  There are wolves among us. They hide in plain sight. Some do not know their own nature and yet others do. Circling, they find their prey and devour it, but not the flesh. Identity, self respect, foundation, security... are torn from them. And so they come to rely on the wolf and fear it. Some get away. Many do not. None are ever the same... My sweet Imogen.. and now Anna.
 

Eorendil

The wolves among us... part II
« Reply #16 on: July 13, 2006, 11:05:47 am »
Time continues rush by like a raging river. I remembered Miss Lee and the Freelancer's story night long enough to pull myself away from the answers I searched for. On my way my I made a trip to Haven and visited my family. My mother had been baking for days, knowing much that I know, preparing her special molasses crackers for Miss Lee's orphans. I was sworn to deliver them, and so I did.    
  There were three who brought things to share. Ifion blessed us with a humorous anecdote from his father. Miss Lee finally recounted the story of Elezander and his Horses. Treana shared with us a poem dedicated to Addison... It was beautiful but so sad.. I could barely hold back the tears.  
  My heart aches for Miss Treana. She seemed to finally have found that happiness we all search for.. that something that we all unknowingly seek. In her grief I only hope that she isn't too proud to remember that she has friends.
  Miss Abigail, you too will be missed. I'm saddened that we never spoke at great length.
  But, back to the Freelancer. For some reason I could not take my eyes from Miss Lee.. something was different and when it struck me it was like a load of iron had been dumped on my chest. At first I asked if she had had her children already but no.. they were taken from her womb by magic. I can not believe this. So much has happened to Anna already. Why can she not be spared for a time? But, she has a strength about her and she takes pride in her work. I admire her and am happy to be there for her. Sometimes I just wish I could do more. This whole thing with Mith... The four of us remaining at the closing of the Freelancer talked about it, generally speaking.
  Blind, desperate obsession... It drives people to do things, unhealthy things. It can turn a hero into a villain.. a savior into a demon... a loved one into a monster. I have yet to recount my own telling and experiences in this but I will. I have to. It rests on my heart like an open wound and it tears a bit more each time I see my sweet little Imogen, broken now these five years and still unable to forgive. I thought I could bear it alone.. but for what I have done I can not begin to show her the way. I am torn. Anna would understand but she bears so much on her shoulders.. Mother, father.. my other brothers and sisters.. all of them feeling so helpless.. and me most of all. She will not even bear my presence.
  When you've killed a man in anger.. you can never forget how that feels. But, to be robbed of the responsability... to be refused any accountability... to be called a liar... but, perhaps, one less wolf among us, though it has earned me no comfort.
  Rest. I must get what rest I can.. so many things weigh on my mind.
  Lord Protector, watch over Anna. Keep your watchful eye on her babies, wherever they may be. Let your wings shelter and keep them safe until we find them. Guide us along the path to the knowledge we need to be able to stop those responsible.
 

Eorendil

A growing storm
« Reply #17 on: July 17, 2006, 10:54:07 am »
Personal entry.. I fear losing myself again. My journeys take me to the far stretches of Dregar these days but distance no longer calms the storm for the reminders are all there... with me.. inside me.
  I met an interesting little fellow recently.. his name was Lyle.. *several dots and a squiggly doodle* Well, his name was Lyle and I fear I did him a disservice. My mind is not my own. My spirit seems to fly to other places.. other times. I nearly overran the little halfling as I passed the merchant houses in Hlint. I apologized and then called him by the wrong name after he introduced himself. He must think I'm a complete idiot and I guess that might not be far from the truth these days. He's looking for his uncle; same name as him. Never heard of him. So much passes my notice...
  Such as... well. I found myself out in the desert with Cymeran and a number of others when I should have been headed for Roldem to meet with Lady Jennara.. I didn't know my way to return and no one was willing to see me back. I was so lost.. but I kept fighting. If I was stuck there I had better earn my keep. I really wasn't thinking.. I'm afraid I might be able to name only a few of those that I worked with to retrieve their minerals and supplies... I wasn't there.. not really. Well.. luck was with me because the group found itself at the house of Ozymandius. He was kind enough to allow those of us that needed to be elsewhere to use his portal. Hesitantly, I took it straight to Pranzis.
  It was the second time in so many days that I had walked those streets and my heart sinks each and every time. So, I left quickly for Lorindar... feeling so overwhelmed... I almost wish to return permanently to my post in North Point. There I feel like what I do has some sort of meaning and these other things seem like little more than distant nightmares. Maybe that's hiding though... From there I sailed to Tibum where I was fortunate and caught the end of the meeting for the Roldem relief. Anna was there as was Lady Jennara, Miss Ash, Daniel Poetr, many others I knew and the Lady Brisbane. Anna had told me about her a number of times but she truly has a presence and most definately makes an impression. As she sized me up I felt almost small even though I tower over her.
  Making our way to Roldem we encountered a number of.. what the others said were.. undead drow. Unbelievable. The first couple of encounters were easily delt with but we were ambushed as we drew closer to Roldez. I stopped, for there were others in these creatures' path and while they tore through my armor I gave the group the time they needed to prepare and deal with them. And another piece of myself was torn away.. inching me ever closer towards my next life. I hope that Rofirein finds me worthy when the time comes.. I don't know any more.
  Lady Brisbane was kind and returned to assist me. She is very direct and perhaps strong willed but definately not cold as some rumor would have told. We ventured a second time through her grove on the way to Roldez and she stopped to reflect. I can not think of a natural place more beautiful and wonderous, dense with growth and life. All the animals within that grove were calm and unafraid. I handed an acorn to a squirrel who'd lost his grip, my head being almost level with the branch he sat upon. He took it and for the remainder of the time I stood there he investigated every inch of my armor. I wonder what that little creature thought of me.. or what he thought me to be, if anything. There was an exchange of words between Lady Brisbane and I regarding the future of her great grove. I hope that I can visit it again. My new, tiny friend chittered at me and jumped to a nearby branch as we moved to leave and catch up with the rest. I felt sad.. If only Imogen could see these places... meet these people... Regardless, Lady Brisbane saw me safely the rest of the way to Roldez but had to return to her grove.
  So, there I stood with Lady Jennara and Anna. We talked over many things and I have been assigned to assist, primarily, in Roldez. But first, I have to make nails.. as many as I can manage. I've a list of things: nails, hinges, wheelbarrows... those will mostly have to be built there if possible. First we will need to clear debris and sort the unusable from what can be reused. Even half beams and scorched doors can be reused as well as any building rock that may still be in good shape. There's so much.  Nails first, then hinges. We'll need a lot of shovels and baskets.. They're going to be lighting the fields with glowing staves.. There is yet hope in the darkness.
  It was an eventful talk and I felt as though I was more myself for a while but I had to leave. I had plans to keep and an outting with members of the Crimson Shield. Saying my goodbyes I reluctantly stepped through the Roldez portal to Hlint and made my way to Fort Hope with haste. My mind was fresh when I arrived. The effort in making good time bled much of the worry from my body.
  Another thing that escaped my notice. Rawkwin is a member of the Crimson Shield. I do not know why I was surprised or why I hadn't heard... He could tell I was troubled and since he asked I found myself talking about Imogen and my distress. His wife, Emerald, graced us with her presence and several others began to gather as well, so the conversation shifted and I was glad of it. I do not know how they might see me in light of what I was about to admit. I won't even write of it here. Fortunately, the pages of my journal ask no questions. They only lay there bare, waiting for me to fill them as I am ready. Some day, perhaps soon, I will lay out what I know and what I feel so that I can make better sense of it all.
  I went with the Crimson Shield group, back to Dregar and the mines I had visitied what seemed like only days before. As we stood on the road to the desert there came a familiar tugging on my cape. I looked around but did not see a soul and it was then I heard the giggling and a familiar shape stepped from the air. Anna was passing through and though I expected her to make for the wilds of Dregar, the Vale perhaps, she join us. I was at once confused and elated. I know Anna hates bloodshed but she seemed very ernest in her desire to come along. With her there it was easier to focus on what was going on, Rodlin, Riley, Cymeran and the others..
  I did not feel nearly as scattered and while I watched over the others in their sleep she rested against me. Will that trust be shaken if I tell her? I have promised that I will and eventually I will have to tell Lady Jennara of my shame as well. I almost blurted it all out when we returned to Mistone to track down some oil in the Grey Peaks.. Anna wished to part company. I told her to go but I wished for her to stay. Even in this I did not waver and therefore it was not a lie but if felt odd, somewhat uneasy. She had seen enough of this world's savagery for one day. I wanted to tell the whole story right there but she bade me to go and catch up with the rest. We said our goodbyes and went our own ways... the world faded a little and in the back of my mind I heard the voice from so long ago, "I don't care"
  We found the oil for the lady.. returned it, and decided we were done. There was some climbing to be done and I am thankful that I was not all there. Thinking of it afterward made my head swim but I was so tired from the events of the day that it didn't matter. I sat there in my padding, resting under that small tree in Fort Llast near the gates that would lead me to Hlint and quickly fell asleep. It was a fitful sleep, an unresting sleep filled with dreams and nightmares. I could see his face there in the doorway. I could see poor Imogen cringing in the background but most of all my ears rung with, "I don't care."
 

Eorendil

Of Faith and Love
« Reply #18 on: July 21, 2006, 10:23:44 am »
I thought it was going to be another day just like any other. I've been working hard on the nails and hinges we need for the building to take place in Roldem. Miss Jennara wants to teach them fishing as well. We talked about Pranzis.. so long as the people are being taken care of no good will come of deposing its new ruler. It reminds Jennara of Stone and what happened there.. not a comforting thought at all.
  I sat with Miss Jennara for some time on the benches in Hlint when a man came and asked us for assistance in the Haven Mines.. I went, because I should but as with so much these past years my work feels so empty. I know those that I help are thankful but I just don't feel it. No meaning.. no purpose. I hid it from myself for a time.. tried to deny it but I see Anna and I can't help but be reminded. She hurts.. in many ways, like my dear Imogen. My heart cries out but it is also trapped by pain. Lord Protector.. how can I be worthy?
  Jaleel.. devout of Rofirein.. he seems so anyways, though he seeks conflict and excitement. His youthful eagerness, perhaps. It can not compare to my shame.. my crime.. my helplessness.
  Lady Jennara noticed something.. I don't know. She was concerned at least and I knew she would ask or I thought she might but she bade me good journeys and went to rest. I almost told her.. were it not for bad timing I might have. I have a great respect for Jennara but I'm not sure what she would think or do about my confessions.  
  I can't see straight any more.. it clouds my mind and chokes me like a thick black smoke and calls out, 'I dont care'. I headed to the Freelancer in hopes of finding the one person that has been able to clear it.
  As I arrived Anna was setting there next to the Ankh, Master Starr speaking with her, but she seemed so small against the world. I almost turned away but something pushed me forward. The look on her face made my chest grow tight and my breathing difficult but Starr welcomed me and Anna nodded that I was welcome. It wasn't long before Starr had to leave and he asked that I help Anna into the Freelancer.
  I knelt down and reached out, holding out to her a single finger from my hand for her to see. It took a few moments but her eyes came into focus. She remembered and smiled. We talked for a few moments about the rain and the docks before she stood up and we went into the Freelancer. I've noticed she does not take compliments well.. She even berates herself with hardly any provocation. It makes my heart ache so.
  I handed her some Juniper berries after making our way past the crowd of children. It makes me smile to see their faces, despite the world and our troubles. After squeezing the juice from the berries she handed me bottle so that I might try it; definately something I will have to add to my meals now and again. I spoke of Jennara and the idea we had talke about about fishing. I had inquired if they still had some boats, even small ones. Anna became even more uneasy and I could tell she was guarding something. I don't know what but I tried to reassure her that I need not know. It is best that she keeps what secrets she needs. I have faith in Anna.. whatever she needs to do she needs to do for good reason. It was all I needed to know that things were being taken care of for the better.
  So we sat by the fireplace.. I on the edge of the stage, Anna on the floor. My knees.. They just don't like me being on the hard floor.. or down too low. She asked me if there was something I wanted to talk about. In truth I just wished to be there but there was something long overdue.. a story that I had promised Anna several times before. I'll save that for another entry as it deserves the attention.
  I finished my tale and Anna handed me a cloth to wipe my face for the simple tell of it is enough to overwhelm me. I saw in her actions that there was some recognition there of what I was telling her but she still seemed far away.. and with reassuring and kindness she confided in me as well. I understand her fear.. from another perspective. I understand the emptiness that she feels for I, myself, have an emptiness.  
  I held her hands in mine as she told me she wished to help my poor dear Imogen and my legs nearly swept out fron beneath me, betraying both my feelings and my lack of sleep. For the second time since I have known her I offered to watch over her.. for her sleep has been fitful and she needs her strength. It was amongst a pile of children that I later found sleep. Having read a number of stories and recounted a few more that I know personally they fell asleep one by one. Anna slept in amongst them, peacefully. I smiled and the world melted away.
  For me sleep was once again restless. A dragon came and took my hammer.. I hope the dream was only born of fear and not some far sight. The other dream came as well.. but this time it was Mith. Mith was in the door. I could see Anna in the back of the room so frightened and crying. Only, I remember what I did... in my dream. I am a protector... but I don't feel worthy.. not of my lord. All the good works in the world could not cover the shame I feel... the loss. Why does he still tolerate me?
 

Eorendil

A wound that does not heal
« Reply #19 on: July 21, 2006, 11:10:29 am »
I sat there.. I don't know how often I looked over to Anna, sitting there, but she seemed almost to be made of stone at times. She wanted to hear what plagued my heart and even more I wanted to tell it to her. And these were my words:
  It is a shame I've carried with me...
  something I can not undo..
  I was fresh from finishing my training and visiting home in Haven a little over five years ago before returning to Pranzis and after that, called by the Dragon. My mother and father had cooked an amazing feast for my return and had called all my brothers and sisters home but there was one chair that was empty. My dearest little sister, Imogen. She had been my heart's joy as I grew up, from the moment mother showed her to me after she was born. She wrote me twicea week while I was in the Citadel, about this and that, mother's doting, father being over protective. And then, a few months before my visit they just stopped. I couldn't fathom why and so I asked.
  Everyone's faces turned to stone. Dad marched from the table to his smithy, shaking. Mother broke into tears and cried uncontrollably, but I pressed for an answer. I didn't know if she was dead, or taken by slavers or worse.. but I could get nothing from my mother. Her tears drowned out her voice.
  It was the littlest of my brothers and sisters that spoke truthfully and without fear... Derick. Derick had taken her away and she didn't want to play with her any more. I didn't know what to think. She had mentioned a Derick once or twice before the letters stopped but always in a very loving manner.
  Being concerned I wanted to go looking for my sister. Kendra was too young stilll to show me where Imogen was but she said she talked to her now and again at the market. It was three days later that I recognized her, walking through the market. She had always been such a beautiful child, brilliant and full of energy but I hadn't recognized her on the second day. It wasn't till the third that I noticed on her wrist a trinket that I'd sent her from Pranzis. It was a small silver bracelet... engraved dragons dancing around it.
  Beside myself with joy I ran to her, took her by the arm to give her a grat hug but her hood fell away.. I'd never seen bruises like that... even in fighting practice. I was stunned, shocked; I couldn't speak and just stood there staring. She looked back at me but... I could barely see my dear little Imogen in thos eyes. They were so full of fear and before I could gather myself she ran.
  I didn't know what to do. Mom and dad had hidden away their pain because I was coming home. I had to get what little I could frind out from my brothers and sisters. Derick, it seems, was the sone of some noble.. a true brat and I guess that he'd made life hard for mom and dad till they quit trying to see her. It infuriated me; turned me cold.
  I always used to protect her and I had to see her. In that moment I regretted leaving for Pranzis.. and a part of me still does.
  It took a little time but I found him and he realized instantly who I was. Who wouldn't? There aren't many around like my family, skin as dark as pitch. At first I begged that he stop hurting her, that he love her like she deserved, that he change things.. but the more I begged or spoke the less he listened. "'I don't care' she's mine.." "'I don't care' leave us alone" "'I don't care'"
  Eventually, I followed Imogen hom from the market one day and as she entered his doorway I could hear him yell and curse her name for some transgression that I do not know but she cowered. She cowered and cringed, this bright beautiful flower I adored and protected since she was a baby...
  Before she could close the door behind her I put my foot in it. I do not know what he filled her mind with. To this day it still taints her. She ran from me to the far side of the entry way and in he came. I stood over him and growled in a voice I still do not believe was my own. I told him to let her go. I told him he was done and he threatened me. He threatened to call the law to take me from his property but in the end he looked back at her and again at me. He told me; no, he threatened that if I did no leave things would be worse for my poor dear Imogen
  I killed him. I must have. I don't remember it, not really. I couldn't think. All I could see was that day in the market and little Kendra saying her sister can't come play with her any more. I remember seeing him laying on the floor, or I think I do. I was standing over him and Imogen had disappeared. I searched for her but did not see her for several days when she showed up on my mother and father's doorstep, shaken and covered in dirt. I went to call in a guard, having regained my composure and know what I should do regardless of what it meant for me but when we returned to the house there was no trace.. nothing. I know I killed him.. and no one believes me.
  The only person that might know hasn't spoken in five years. What's worse? I can't even be in the same room with her. She's moody and broken even around the rest of the family but me, I"m like a burning knife in her flesh. She flies into a rage and I can't ge through to her.
  There was an investigation but it didn't go anywhere.. Derick has never been seen again and no evidence was found so no charges were ever pressed. I returned to Pranzis, thinking I could set things right in my heart and shortly after I was called back to Hlint by the dragon.  
 
  That's pretty much it.. I searched for answers but the one person who might hold a clue is locked within herself.. I am sorry I did not share this with those who matter to me most, sooner. No matter what happens I need to help my little sister..