Worn Leather Bound Journal

[Gilrod]

** journal kept in a neat, well practiced flowing script**

Tunar, 28 Junar

   I keep this journal to chronicle my failure, and with hope, my redemption in the eyes of my Mistress.  Perhaps someday, my words will inspire some acolyte of my order.  At the very least, these words will explain my actions to my superiors should some stranger stumble upon my cold corpse in the wood.

   To the reader of this journal, be it known that you read the thoughts of a humble cleric of Lucinda, known in this world as Nathaniel… previously that of Nathaniel Spellguard.

   I was born a youth who never knew the love of parents. My father, a of some celestial heritage, is all but unknown to me.  My mother was a nameless wizardess, felled by a Balor in service to Lucinda.  I mention these fleeting persons so that it be know that I had no knowledge of a true surname other than that of “Nathaniel” given to me by the order of Lucinda’s that had been benevolent enough to care for an orphaned child of aasimar blood.

   It was I that chose the name “Spellguard” in a promise made in silent prayer to Lucinda, may Weave flow forever.  I had promised my Mistress to protect those who weave magics from her bounty. But…

** small circular water stains blot the page here and bleed the ink into indecipherable smears**

… I have failed her.  Every great quest I have undertaken with allies in the name of Mistone, and more importantly, my Mistress has resulted in my death!  Only by the grace of the Mistress of the Weave and the mercy of such mortal souls as Reventage D’vinn and Quintayne Rosewyne do I still stand (anew) among the living of Mistone.  I have failed to deserve the name Spellguard!  And most recently, I have failed the family Rosewyne and was partially devoured by fiends before the benevolent Lady D’vinn found my soul and made my body whole.  For the first time, I have been resurrected without my complete soul.  I have lost a piece of it forever… a lesson of my Mistress I endeavor to suppose.  A price paid for the arrogant boast of my youth.  I shall forgo the name Spellguard and be but Nathaniel.  My Goddess has shown me deserving of no surname.  

   Before you, a stranger to my mind, conclude that I am but a self-deprecating coward, know this: every man of faith must believe in the possibility of redemption in the eyes of their Mistress.  In my days walking Mistone, I have shown but one skill.  I have begun to craft mundane items with great skill.  Perhaps, with time I will develop this skill to truly honor my Goddess with great skill in crafting item that are graced by Lucinda’ s touch.  But redemption shall have a price.  I will take to wondering life, one of harsh reality.  I must learn where every resource is to be found to further my craft.  Such a life shall be my penance.  I believe as much because Lucinda has chosen to grace me with Divine Invisibility, a spell not granted to all of her followers.  I always took this for granted before.  Now I see it as a sign.  She has mercifully granted me the means to hide my shame until I prove myself worthy.

-- Note to self --
   -- Perhaps you shall find a way to repay Lady D’vinn and Master    Rosewyne.  DO NOT FORGET DEBTS OWED!  If you ever wish to be considered a Cleric of strong fiber, you must owe no debt in this world or another, save to your Mistress.  Perhaps when you discover a way to pay such kindness in kind, you will be deserving of the Trials of Lucinda. --

[Gilrod]

A few days ago I embarked with some others to aid a halfling named Danny.  This young halfling wished to woo a clever fey lass with an impressive ring.  I suggested to use the simple, yet elegant pearl as a sign of affection.  This young fellow found the suggestion appealing and I and some transient companions set about to the Haven mines to recover some platinum in which to set the pearl.  In use to you, acolyte was the method of defense I employed against the orges of the Haven Mines.

Much practice with my oaken bow in the woods while gathering components for alchemy has yielded results!  I have perfected a form of archery that depends not on nimble fingers.  I used experience and concentration to guide my arrows ... to great effect!  Such a manner of archery, while a difficult feat to master, is unimpeded by the lack of dexiterity of the archer.  This could be profoundly useful to an archer in full plate armor.

"Archers in full plate armor!" you may exclaim, but ponder mounting a successful defense of a weilder of our mistress's blessing.  Many a mage stays a distance from the combat.  A competent defender would necessary place themselves between the threat and the Weaver, yet to close to close combat could be hasty.  A ranged defender could act more appropriately shield a Weaver instead of being drawn into an offensive fray lead by comrads.  A Spellguard's first duty would be to protect the blessed Weaver in their care or holy site where the Weave converges!  Using this meditative archery, a Spellguard can protect his charge, disrupt enemy casters and stay close to his/her charge and use themselves as the Weaver's shield.

I have used this tatic to some effect, although unarmored, in the Haven mines.  I used by bow to distract orge mages while using my invisibility purge spell granted by the blessed Mistriss to make them vulnerable to the fighters.  My arrows disrupted the brute's spells while the Weaver I protected worked his art.  Although this was not a particularly challenging test, it was promising none the less.

Perhaps in time, I can develope further tactics in order to preserve the safety of Weavers furthering the Art and the will of my Mistress.

I have hope, as I continue my journeys, that I may perhaps earn my Mistress's forgiveness for my youthful arrogance.

[Gilrod]

Today I had yet another poignant reminder of the arrogance of my youth.  From the corner of my eye, or perhaps within the frame of my Mind's Eye; I convinced myself that I had seen her and my heart was both alight with joy and heavy with loss.

She was a being of contradiction.  A Tiefling by blood, she struggled with her nature and on many occasion aided the cause of good ... even if reluctantly.  I remeber when, together with others, we bound ourselves to a quest to defeat a drow plot to use the spirit of a great and ancient fallen elf, corrupted by anguish of betrayal of love against the citizens of Mistone.  I could not but help admire the strength she possessed in her daily struggle against the tendancies of her fiendish blood.

I reveled in her presence.  Despite my own celestrial heritage, I found myself strangely drawn to her inner strength.  The arrogance of my youth blinded me to the reality that our bloodlines were entirely incompatible as I goaded her into being frustrated by making plain the wonderful duality of her nature.  She was so lovely when her eyes became darly crimson in her frustration.

Alas, we parted ways ... as soon after I realized my failure and shame in not living up to the taken name Spellgaurd and began my remote, sequestered penance.  Last I heard, she had fallen.  Mysteriously gone from this world and with my feelings left unspoken ... possibly as it should be.

I believe I may learn much from this reflection.  She was a creature born to damned blood, yet struggled every day to redeem her heart, against even her own conscious will.  Her example inspires me.  If I may show but an inkling of her strength, I may very well overcome my shame and realize a future ... a future where I might do great credit to my Mistress ... and to her memory.

I never thought I would claim this.  But the world is a poorer realm without the presence of a particular teifling.  Let whatever acolyte who may one day read these words know this... You may find strength of will in the most unexpected of places and use it as a tool to further Lucinda's Glory.  My silent, little strength has a name.  It is affectionately known as ... Key.

[Gilrod]

Yesterday, I partook of a most curious adventure.  I was returning from a foraging trip, gathering clay, when patches of darkness began to envelope portions of the small community which I call home… Fort Llast.  From the darkness immerged all sorts of foul denizens from the plane of shadow and were destroyed by our impromptu band of adventurers.

I joined a small group of adventures to track down the cause of this darkness.  We were following a group of black cloaked monks or the like.  The patches of darkness apparently stemmed from something in their possession.  We were waylaid once again in Fort Hope.  Many fell to the darkness, including myself.  By Lucinda’s grace, I was returned to this world and was able to raise another.

We followed the trail of the black robed monks to Port Hampshire.  There, we discovered that they were carrying a powerfully enchanted black gemstone that appeared to be able to draw in and absorbed the very shadow stuff of darkness!  We further discovered that the possession of this stone was linked to the Black Wizards.  On of my fellow adventurers, refused to accept that a mysterious black robbed female was to depart with the stone so that it could be secretly buried and protected from the hands of Blood’s legions.  In the end, my neighbor, Rufus Coldfinger convinced here not to impede the progress of the mysterious figure.

I feel that the threat from this stone is far from finished.  Rufus seemed far too yielding in this situation.  I found this most curious.  Perhaps there is truth to the rumors that my powerful neighbor is somehow linked to the Black Wizards.  If he is, I hope Lucinda may guide is soul so that he is not prematurely destroyed in a selfish grab fro arcane power.

For now, my home in Fort Llast is safe.  I really should buy some real furniture.  It is currently more a warehouse than a home.  I currently sleep on a rug, when not sleeping in the wilds, amid a collection of large chests and crates.  Considering I do not normally entertain guests, perhaps a decision to purchase amenities would be premature.  For now, my “laboratory/warehouse” will suffice.

For the glory of Lucinda, now where did I place that gem setting tool?

[Gilrod]

Perhaps my favor in Lucinda's eyes has improved...

In the last few weeks I have stumbled upon not one, but two mineral emeralds.  Due to my lack of skills I have sold one and will soon sell the other.  The funds and magic items will forward my goals to become an expert crafter of enchanted items will be furthered greatly.

This is a good omen, to which I give my thanks to Lucinda.

[Gilrod]

I met the most interesting being the other day.

I was lost in a vast desert on Dregar when I was stumbled upon by a party of adventurers seeking to free a town from a plague of constructs.  I joined there cause to investigate such a misuse of magic.

During this noble venture, I was called upon to use my power as a cleric, blessed be Lucinda's Grace, to raise from death a fallen wizard.  I foolishly assumed that such a gifted wizard would have been a devote follower of Lucinda.  Lucinda punished me for my ignorance ... and for raising a being loyal to a deific enemy.  I felt as though a bit of myself was taken and was shaken to my soul.

My initial reaction was to abhor this being, but that is not what my order has taught me and is counter to the nature that is my aasimar birthright.  I waryily apologized to this stranger while keeping a safe distance.  This stranger approached me and we began a converation.

I discovered that he too, this Tath, was of a conflicted nature as well.  Whereas I struggle with the shame of my failures in Lucinda's eyes, this wizard struggles of what path he should take.  Our association inspired me to remove my hood.  He removed his hood as well.  To my shock he was cursed with the dark elf birthright.  

Our converation revealed that he followed the dark elves' sadistic god as a matter of habit.  I felt it my duty to speak the teachings of Lucinda and her Blessings.  He was ready to listen, but not yet ready to follow.  Perhaps in time, he will see the strength of the Mistress of the Weave and the glory of her teaching.

Oddly enough, when I mentioned a sale of a jewel to Rufus Coldfinger, this Tath confided that Master Coldfinger was once his mentor in the Arts.  I am curious as to why Rufus would teach an enemy of Lucinda's the power of the Weave.  Tath further stated, "Good luck," when speaking of my upcoming meeting.  What an odd statement to make.  Master Coldfinger has always been a upstanding worshipper fo Lucinda in high standing and a neighbor of mine in Fort Llast.  I must think on these happenings for meaning and Lucinda's purpose for me.

[Gilrod]

Not too long ago I ran into Master Coldfinger again in Hlint.

Rufus informed me that a one Kobal Bluntaxe was petitioning the Queen of Mistone, a glorious Chosen of Lucinda, to ban the practice of Necromancy.  How absurd this little dwarf must be!  Might as well cut off his nose to spite his face!  To think that the banning of Necromancy would end the abusive acrane practices of malign wizards is quite foolish.

Soon Celgar, a fellow Cleric of Lucinda, joined our discussion.  I implored him to speak out against this plot, or at least inform the Circle of Necromancy of this move against the Church and arcanist in general.  If Necromancy was banned, what about Evocations?  An irresponsible wizard of sufficient power could lay waste to entire villages!  I would not dare speak before a Chosen of Lucinda until I am redeemed and freed from my hermitage.  Celgar said he would speak to the brash dwarf.  I hope he talked some since into the diminutive fool.  I only hope he had some luck.

Those who fear what they do not understand, if given the opportunity, would be all of our undoing even with the greatest of intent and purity of heart.