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Messages - Acco
1
« on: July 25, 2011, 06:16:42 PM »
On behalf of Ygraine Ursus,
100,000 bid for item 1
(signed on behalf of Ygraine Ursus)
2
« on: January 04, 2011, 12:10:36 PM »
Thanks to DM OSX for the impromptu! Couldn't agree more geloooo and thanks to OSX for running another short and quirky encounter which led to some angst over what Ni'haer actually wanted the poor little thing for anyway :rolleyes:
3
« on: June 09, 2010, 06:17:08 PM »
I have found a challenge I must take some time soon...me against a bear worthy of my skills.
I found it by complete accident when I was out past Krashin.
It was just standing there, unfazed by the weather or anything else. It was so powerful I could feel it's aura before I even got near it.
And so my challenge will be to bend the bear to my will and then become it's friend for a time in need. I know I can do this....
4
« on: November 28, 2009, 07:20:53 PM »
*giggles to herself at Jay's comment, then gets serious*
1300 trues
~~ Ygraine
5
« on: November 28, 2009, 06:30:24 AM »
Hmm, could be useful, so I'll bid 1000 trues.
~~ Ygraine, of the Ursus clan
6
« on: November 26, 2009, 07:52:28 AM »
I revisited Krashin again, to try to talk to the wolves and bears and see if I could take on a shape to help me with the goblin riders.
The bears and wolves are becoming easier to control and if I approach them softly and gently and without anger, they seem to be quite accepting of me.
I even tried it ad a bear and it worked just the same. My anger is under control now and I am in control all the time and what a difference it makes.
On the way to the goblins, I say some adventurers in the distance and they had run foul of the kobolds, so watched them for a while to see how they handled the kobolds. It became apparent that they were struggling, and once one of the kobolds summoned a wolf in support, I went to help them. I changed into a bear and ran into their company to help out and in a short time, had helped them defeat the kobolds. They seemed surprised by my presence, but I remained that way as I found it enjoyable and left them shortly afterwards, all the more puzzled by my appearance and disappearance.
7
« on: November 22, 2009, 07:06:22 PM »
I continue to be amazed by the power of self-awareness and the easiness and advantages of controlling my anger.
I met a man today when I was with some others: Annwll, Xanya and Grendola. I can't remember his name, but he said he was from the Raven clan of Krashin. I am sure it was the Raven clan who attacked my village, but I did not get angry and kill him right away (which I woul have done some months back), but instead talked to him calmly. I did not treat him warmly and explained my antipathy, but for me, it was a revelation.
I felt in control and aware of myself and my feelings, instead of as before, my rage would have taken me into combat right away.
I listened to the man and heard his explanations as to why he wouldn't have been involved, so I offered some consolation to him by saying that he could earn my trust. Annwyl was great - she was gooing to defend me and attack the man on the spot - she looked to me for our sign - but I signalled her to her that it was okay and that I was in control.
There seems to a lot of things about me that I am learning as if I was a newborn and as much as I love my bear spirit, it seems I have found a new path that my shaman teacher knew nothing of. I must say, I prefer this new route immensely and am waking each mornng with a freshness in my heart and sould that I have not felt since I was a child.
8
« on: November 21, 2009, 08:16:52 PM »
I took a leap of faith and went out past Krashin to the Ice Island to see if I could find a polar bear and some ice wolves. I wanted to test my new resolve on them to see if I could befriend them in their own shapes and then as my own self.
I eventually found a polar bear, and walked towards it confidently, but slowly. At first it bristled and growled, but it must have sensed no danger or anger in me, for it returned to foraging for food. I stepped out of sight and smell and repeated it again and again until it happened without thought.
My final test was to approach it as a bear, then to reveal myself as a human to it and see how it responded, and I was amazed to be successful again.
I repeated this with some winter wolves, and although they were in a pack, I tried to radiate an aura of confidence and not anger or violence, and it worked as it had with the bear. I even changed into a wolf in front of them and they acted no differently.
I am positive that I have enough control over my own feelings now to be able to change into whatever shape will suit my purpose. I need to explore the world now to see what other shapes I can take - they must be wide and varied and simple animals are now no challenge to me at all.
9
« on: November 21, 2009, 08:10:43 PM »
I met up with Xanya today, and we maneged to fertilize a lot of goblins and things, as Cardin is wont to say.
Xanya is learning well, on her route to become a bear warrior, but I know now that my path lies in a different direction. Fighting alongside her, I see in her the anger that I used to feel, and where she uses that anger to fuel her strength, I know now that I do not need it, for my strength comes from my secure knowledge in my own being.
I have now used my own desire to change my shape to a bear, a panther, a wolf, a badger, and even a boar.
What made this all the more remarkable is that I changed into a boar out of sight, then ran up to Annwyl (I do love her so) and she knew it was me, even though I snuffled around her feet as as boar! I think she sees the real me inside whatever shape I assume (and she has admitted to me that she loves me no matter what shape I take).
I am beginning to feel the real stirrings of a new shape that I can take, with just a little more effort. Annwyl's love has freed me from my connection to my old anger and has released this inside me, to know my true self and my true nature.
I can feel this new shape....
10
« on: November 21, 2009, 05:49:42 PM »
I was out by Palden Lake and came across a cave in the Whithorn Forest, so naturally, I went in for a look to see what in it.
I rounded the first corner and came face to face to with a large brown bear - I don't know who was the more surprised - it or me? Normally, I would have been furious at being surprised, but instead, I tried to empathise with the bear and walked casually towards it as I did so. It looked at me steadily, but did not attack.
Encouraged, I walked nearer but could see the bear was still not entirely friendly to me - what to do? Almost as soon as I began to think of solutions, it came to me, and I changed into a bear in front of it. I had no sooner done this, than the bear came to me and nuzzled me - I was overwhelmed by the bearness of it, it's power and strength, but it had sensed my spirit and calmness I am sure from the first sight, and was merely puzzled by me. I must be projecting my own self awareness more now than I had previously thought.
I had the bear follow me as I toured that cave and found other bears, who also were friendly to me, but then I spotted some beetles so decided my experiment had gone far enough.
I returned to the cave mouth, talking to the bear all the way in grunts and roars, and it seemed perfectly at ease with me, even when i changed back into human form again.
I left my new bear friends behind and returned to the Lake to go fishing and ponder this new development.
No anger, even when surprised! I must remember that as I am sure it made the difference between fighting and friendship.
11
« on: November 14, 2009, 07:20:25 AM »
I was passing through Hlint and met up with some adventurers, Annwyl, Trenton, Azk'a, Sonya and a horrible elven man who wouldn't give his name but wore bandages on his face (Verdin Cowl). He insulted me and I was going to belt him one, by the Captain held me back. Just as well for him.
I digress though. A woman came up the street with a little girl who was unwell, and although trenton examined her, he could find nothing wrong. We toook her to the temple and I watched the little girl, and I got it.
I think because I am in touch with myself, and know who and what I am, I sensed the change in this small girl. As I watched, it became obvious to me that the girl had been bitten by a were creature and I was aware of the inner changes going on within her.
I warned the others, and sure enough, the girl changed and in her new form, killed her mother. The others killed the girl, and we now hunt the monsters who did this, but I am pleased that I sensed, or felt, the change in the girl well before her physical changes appeared.
I am convinced this is because I know my own true self so well now and am well grounded in my own reality and that around me. I can't wait to perfect this skill and change onto other shapes as I need them. Perhaps I will be able to change into the were creature the girl fell victim to?
12
« on: November 11, 2009, 10:07:09 AM »
I was out by Corax Lake, and ran around a corner and straight into a giant.
Oh my, I was unarmed and unarmoured (Annwyll would laugh at that - she says I already wear too little armour to make any difference), but I reached into myself and shifted into the only shape I know that would help me at that moment, the bear.
I found Annwyl's love of myself deep inside me - she loves me for me, and not for any outer covering I may be draped in. She was really happy when I shifted into a panther by our campsite, and she laughed like a girl while I ran around her in circles, and licked her face afterwards. She said then that she didn't mind at all what shape I took, as she she knew it was still me, and it was my core she loved.
But I digress.
There was the giant, so I shifted into the most powerful shape I could think of at that time, so I became the bear and fought it. It was hard, but eventually I prevailed and overcame it. Not once did I lose my temper, or my sense of self, and happily walked back to Haft Lake to go for a swim. I was swimming as a bear, but when I jumped out of the water, I was back in human form again so as to not upset the locals.
I can change shape with ease now and it is becoming easier the more confident I become with my own inner being and sense of self.
13
« on: November 09, 2009, 04:28:07 PM »
I was fighting some goblins today, with Xanya and a strange dwarf called either Hail or Big Man (I think he was hiding his identity).
We were fighting some really tough goblins, and I was having trouble hitting them, so I sheathed my scimitar and shield and changed into a bear in front of the goblin as I knew that shape would give me the extra power I needed. He must have been shocked, for he did not attack me, and with the power of my new shape, I killed him where he stood.
Xanya was especially pleased as she is a true Bear Warrior, so I fought like that a little until I no longer needed the bear form and turned back into mu human shape again.
What is pleasing is how easily I can do this now. The dragonling shape is nearly within my reach now.
14
« on: November 06, 2009, 10:05:33 AM »
It is becoming easier and easier, this form changing.
I was with a large group of people: Annwyl, Val, Jebediah, Larissa and Xanya, and we were out around Orc's Watch and then onto Vale, where I stopped with Annwyl to rest and let the others go on.
I have Annwyl to thank really, for she has shown me true love, and love has conquered my anger, and this, in turn, has allowed me to understand myself. I can still sense my bear totem, but he has become a counsellor, more, and he leads me not in anger any more.
I am wandering, really, for what I mean to say is that Annwyl has opened the path for me to take the shape of whatever I want to be. I need no anger, I need no totem to guide me, for I am safe and secure in my own-ness to know who I am am, so that my shape does not matter. I can simply will it now, and I am the shape I need to be.
I realised this as we were leaving Orc's Watch and saw a boar ahead. I felt it would be good to talk to her, so I simply changed into a wolf and went and talked to her.
It was wonderful. It was liberating. I was still me.
I could still see Annwyl perfectly and still felt the same way, but I was talking to a boar and it was talking to me.
Deep joy, for I feel I am on the threshold now. Not much longer, I hope, to take that final step.
15
« on: November 02, 2009, 05:27:49 PM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
I know now how to change my shape!! I was out by Corax Lake, resting and listening to the plants and trees, when I saw some berries on an island on the lake. I wanted to go and eat the berries, and suddenly, there I was on the island. I had wanted to go there and remember thinking it would be easy if I could fly, and so I flew there!
No anger, no bears, no spirits; I just changed and flew there. Strange though, for I mut have fallen asleep after eating them and flew back because some time later I awoke and I seemed to have flown back to the spot where I was before I ate the berries.
No matter. What I know now is that I needed my anger and bear totem to show me that I could change my shape, but now I know I can change without any of them - they helped me to understand myself, but now that I do, I do not need them any more.
What a revelation! I have the knowledge now and know I can change my shape, because my shape is not important as it does not define me!
It is me that remains constant throughout and the rest is simply a shape I can take to suit my own purposes. I must have known this all my life I suppose, because nudity never bothered me and I am rarely aware of my own nakedness, something Annwyl and Cardin are always reminding me of.
I will concentrate hard and try again to take on this dragonling form I can sense blossoming on the edge of my awareness.
16
« on: October 31, 2009, 03:47:38 PM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
I found my uncle - Droog Ursus - what deep joy. He was out by Lake Corax as I was out hunting and together we went to fight some giants.
He is an awsome fighter, and although he is like all the others of my clan, he doesn't really want to have anything to do with avenging my tribe. He is also not a shaman or a shifter, so he is not going to be of any help to me. Except in one thing.
We were in some deep and dark caves, full of giants, and I was badly injured. I needed some rest, but he wanted to leave the caves quickly. I told him to go, to leave me, and as I did, I felt the insides of my body harden and change to help protect me. I was calm as I felt this happening, then almost as suddenly as it happened, it returned to normal again when Droog said he would wait a little longer.
I have not felt this change before, but I think it must be part of my response to change. I suppose that if my outside changes to a bear, my insides have to change as well. And if I can change into this dragonling I can sense on the edges of my perception, then it would make sense for my insides to change as well.
It is gettig nearer and nearer. I can sense it more often now and I am excited by it.
I hope Annwyl is not frightened.
17
« on: October 29, 2009, 07:36:18 PM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
More time ithe mountains, this time in Brech, out past Brenuth. Oh how these ranges and the snow reminded me of home.
I was meditating and trying to change into a lizard, I can change into a bear or wolf with ease now, but it is a slow process. I think I am doing it, but when I look more closely at my legs, feet or hands, they seem to dissolve back to himan form again.
I was wandering about as a bear, with Poo, my spirit guide, as company, when I saw some adventurers in the distance, so I went over to see what they were up to.
They were heading up the mountains to get some sort of crystalline thing, so I changed back to my human shape and sent Poo into the woods to wait for me and joined them.
We were a mighty horde, but not very powerful and we got hurt a lot, but we battled our way to a cave of giants and had a great battle in there. On the way, I talked a dire tiger into joining us for a while and she as a great help. However, I went to sleep and found the tiger had deserted me and when I went to talk to her, she attacked me. I was sure my legs and arms had changed into lizards, and that was why she attacked, but the others said no, and that I looked as if I was dream-walking.
Perhaps they were right, but I can feel this change becoming stronger within me and I know I just need a small leap to break the barrier and be able to change into this lizard form that I know I can be.
In fact, I am wondering now if this human shape is not just a shell, and that I can take any shape I want to. Even as a bear, I know I am still me, yet my shape has changed, so perhaps I do not really have any shape that is me, since they are all me?
Hmm, this needs some more thought; I may be onto something....
18
« on: October 25, 2009, 06:23:41 PM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
I spent another week in the mountains, trying to practice talking to the animals and nature herself, and trying to change my shape. I was out on the Dragon Isles with some others, and talked a Forest Render into helping us, a Grizzly Bear, a Parrot, and a few other animals.
We lost Sy'ris and Xanya for while in the caves of the cow bears, and I nearly got killed when I was turned to stone, but Jebediah saved me until I could break free and kill it.
I left them to return back though and stayed up there. And it was during the end of that time, when I was trying to talk to a grizzle bear, with my dear Poo-azzh at my side (my companion) that I turned into a bear myself!!
Poo and I ran about the mountains like that for hours and hours and what fun we had, swimming, hunting and rolling about. Later that night, when we rested, I am sure I felt the scales return to my legs and arms, but when I awoke, it was the sound of Poo's snoring that have startled me and my legs and arms were normal. Worried it had all been a dream, I thought about my shape and there I was, a bear again, so I know that is now part of me now.
I shall keep communing and will become my true shape in time. I know I can do it.
19
« on: October 22, 2009, 07:15:48 PM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
What can I add to my diary that can explain the changes I am now feeling?
I met a new woman called Sy'ris, she's an elf, but I think she comes from the desert as she is blck skinned. Nice though, but quiet.
Anyway, what I an trying to say is that Annwyl has changed me somehow, for I was with her and Xanya, another elf who doesn't talk in common, and we met a man called Isherwood. He was going into a cave so we teamed up. On the hill near the cave was a huge griffin and Isherwood was going to kill it, but I stopped him and instead calmed the griffin and git it to folllow us.
We ran into some gnolls, and the hurt Annwyl and I got so angry I attacked them and forgot about the griffin and it got killed in the figh defending me. I was hurt at it's death, and collected it's remains to honour it,when Xnya spoke to me in roars and grunts and I understood her.
She is a bear warrior and she said she could feel some of my pain, I thnk, but what amazed me most was that as she and Annwyl consoled me, I am sure my feet changed inside my boots as my anger left and my feelings settled again an I regained my composure. I untied my boots, but when I looked, my feet were normal, but I know they were changing.
Later on in the cave,Isherwood gave his life defending Xanya, and it was the bravest thing I have seen. I tried to save Isherwood too, but even my companion got killed and we were lcky to get out alive.
My bear spirit was there; I sensed him, but I knew that anger was not the path to follow this time. If only could have become the winged lizard I can feel just inside me, I'm sure I could have saved Isherwood too.
20
« on: October 17, 2009, 08:57:52 AM »
~~ The path to becoming a shifter - my true form ~~
I have now caught up, dear diary, and this news is the best.
After we parted at the marshes, I went to Hempstead to seek knowledge on my shape and met a powerful wizard who told me I might find the answer in Spellguard.
Off I went and on the way, met dear Annwyl. We went to Spellguard and on the journey came across some gnolls who we fought. They were tough, but we triumphed in the end. It was after the last fight, covered in blood, that Annwyl told me she loved me.
Oh rapturous joy! I was overcome with emotion and could only hug her tightly and murmur in her ear that I felt the same. My heart was full of love and joy and all at once I felt completely whole; as if I was at one with the world. I was at peace, and content, and at long last, complete.
The trip to Spellguard was uneventful, but we were so besotted it didn't matter, even when we got to the tower and it was closed. We simply sat at the edge of the cliffs and watched the world go by, cradled in each other's arms.
It was in that position at that point that I knew I would soon be able to change my shape at will, and without any thought.
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