Author Topic: Corsan Ament (Read 2169 times)

SteveJW · « **on:** September 02, 2005, 10:30:00 PM »

It's been six seasons now and I'm no closer to finding my birth parents than when I first came here. But then Matilda Landsend gave me a nudge in the right direction. She reads tarot cards and told me that there was no malice in their abandoning me...but there is treachery and deceit involved. I will start my search as soon as possible now. The amulet with my name...seems like a good starting point.

And what in Layonara was I doing in a den of Shadison, the Snake God? Predictably, I went to the Void and almost went to the Soul Mother. Not a nice experience. Never is. Got to pick my fights better. And have a better weapon...the sword I had didn't cut it.

SteveJW · « **Reply #1 on:** September 03, 2005, 08:10:00 AM »

I'm becoming a good smithy. I finally managed to craft a weapon. A sai blade made of copper. Such a good and sturdy blade. Gave it to Sy'Ravenne as a gift. She likes the exotic weapons. A beautiful blade, for a beautiful warrior. Different from those Elven girls back home. A pleasant difference for sure. I must make a twin for the Sai....they should always be made in pairs.

And fearsome...while helping some newcomers with the Red Light Goblin tribe, she took down those goblins like a warm knife through butter. Such agility and skill. It was a fine sight to see. And she isn't bad to look at either...I thought I caught her eying me as we rested, and we were trading friendly flirtations throughout the trip...but is it wishful thinking? I don't know...

SteveJW · « **Reply #2 on:** September 03, 2005, 10:58:00 PM »

How does one make gold around here? All the gold I do make goes to healing salves and replacing broken picks. How does everyone else do it? I am getting better in smithing...made a couple of shields and a katar blade...should fetch something from newcomers...and I made the twin to the gift sai blade that I gave Sy'Ravenne. Hope she likes them.

At least Talisin Woolhands commissioned me to find a box of Chicken Eggs and and Corn Grains for him. Will pay me around 3000 gold sovreigns for the lot. Now...I haven't seen any chickens around Hlint. Corn stalks either. Where do I start to look? I'll need some help. Maybe Sy' would be interested in helping me...I'll have to split the fee with her...but at least I get to see her again and give her the other sai I made.

SteveJW · « **Reply #3 on:** September 08, 2005, 03:59:00 PM »

I died twice today. And both times the Soul Mother's siren call bade me to follow her. It took all I had to refuse. All I thought about was Sy'Ravenne. I had to get back to her...the Soul Mother may not have me yet...but it is getting harder to resist...

I crafted another bronze shield. Good quality. Now to try some armor...the small stuff first...then the larger stuff when I get it down. The first set will be mine of course...Tried to make arrows...but the wood snapped. Got to get some more....

SteveJW · « **Reply #4 on:** September 11, 2005, 12:49:00 PM »

When will this bad luck change...

I died again last night. Thank the gods the Soul Mother didn't call for me. Broke all 4 picks I brought with me. I had a fully laden ox and I was eager to get to the forge to smelt when kobolds attacked. I fought them off almost dying before I left the cave. Not before I shattered the longsword that Jet crafted for me...trying to switch from my last pick.

Then once outside...I find that spiders had killed Antos, my loyal and trusted ox. Then they decsended on me. I didn't stand a chance in my weakened condition and I died there. No siren call this time from the Soul Mother. Vivian Elishan...bless her...helped met get back and reclaim my soul. She and Jet have been true friends to me. Lost all that ore I fought and sweated for. This makes 3 days in a row this has happened. Except for dying this last time.

I have gone to the Wild Surge to drown my sorrows....I wish Sy'Ravenne were here. I could go bashing something right about now...and I could use her companionship too...

SteveJW · « **Reply #5 on:** September 11, 2005, 03:50:00 PM »

I finally told Sy'Ravenne how I feel about her.

But...and there always is a 'but'...she says she likes me a lot...but her heart leans towards another. But she won't say who. She was worried that I would tie her down...keep her spirit from being free...but nothing can be further from the truth. It is her free spirit that I fell for and I wouldn't change that for anything. Her heart is torn between the two of us. I told her to follow her heart...and I hope that it brings her to me.

She hasn't ruled out the possibility of us being together...and I won't either. I will wait...

5100 gold for the gems I put up for auction!!! That will set me up a bit so I don't neeed to live day to day. I have to check the bulletins at the Surge. Maybe there is a new bid...

SteveJW · « **Reply #6 on:** September 13, 2005, 04:14:00 PM »

I think I know who it is that has Sy'Ravenne's heart...Jet.

I saw it in the way she talked in the Craft House the other day. The way she reacts when Jet and Vivian are together. It is as if she is jealous of Vivian.

Jet...

At first...I was angry at him. How dare he steal her from me? But...that was a foolish gut instinct. Jet can't control these things no more than I could. And he is my friend. And I know he wouldn't steal Ravenne from me. He has Vivian...they are quite a couple.

And I can't lose what I never had. I will just have to wait and try to win Ravenne's heart...

SteveJW · « **Reply #7 on:** September 15, 2005, 06:01:00 PM »

I almost lost her....

I had sent a note and rose to Ravenne...just to tell her I miss her. A runner returned and told me she was slain by ogres and hasn't returned from the Void. My heart filled with sorrow and rage. I wanted to go to Haven and slay every ogre I came across.

I was near Lake Alon...when my heart leapt for joy. Coming up the road from Haven was Ravenne!!! Alive and whole. I hugged her repeatedly...I didn't want to stop. I was so relieved...

She told me I shouldn't worry that much...that warriors will fall sooner or later. I know this...but I can't help it...I love her.

Let's hope she falls later rather than sooner...

SteveJW · « **Reply #8 on:** September 17, 2005, 11:28:00 AM »

I am making a fool of myself.

Zeos...that arrogant huanor en orqu...knocked Ravenne to the ground after a somewhat successful trip into the Haven Mines. He best stay out of my way...

Sure...pick on the lady...but wouldn't try that with me. He even made an untoward insinuation about Ravenne.
It made me...furious. Ravenne got annoyed that I would think such a thing about her. Me and my jealousy...it will scuttle any hope of winning Ravenne over.

She did forgive the fool in me. She will dine with me next time the Leilon Arms opens up. I have to get the proper clothes. Maybe Vivian can make something for me....

SteveJW · « **Reply #9 on:** September 18, 2005, 06:19:00 PM »

So it stands...I should have seen it coming...Just like back home...

Love and pain seem to go together. I thought I was prepared for this...but I was wrong. It turns out that Jet does feel about Ravenne the way she feels about him. Jet said so in the Craft House. My heart broke as Ravenne said...'Corsan....I'm sorry...' She made no promises to me. I will step aside and let them be together. For Ravenne's happiness...and for friendship for Jet.

Jet gave me his symbol of Ilsare...for guidance. Gods know I could use some. But I'll never stop loving Ravenne. Nor hold any ill towards Jet. I hope he makes her happy. That is all that matters now. I shall use the iron scimitar Ravenne gave me. At least I'll have that part of her. But there will never be another like her.

Gods...I wish it didn't hurt so much. Maybe next time I fall and go to the Void...I shall listen to the Soul Mother's siren call...

SteveJW · « **Reply #10 on:** September 20, 2005, 08:30:00 PM »

I can't get Ravenne out of my mind. Gods how I love her so. I try to tell myself that she is just another Elven girl that you can't love....but that is a lie. I regret the letter I sent her. Sounds like I'm giving up. But I can't...

I hope it is not too late to win her heart...I hope the dozen flowers tells her that...Please Ilsare...let me see her again...

SteveJW · « **Reply #11 on:** September 21, 2005, 07:06:00 PM »

At least Ravenne and I can still be together...at least as friends right now. But I stlll want her as more than a friend. But I will bide my time...it is the only thing left to do...

I haven't seen Jet around since that little episode...I hope he didn't do something rash...he was pretty upset after the other night...he is still my friend and all.

I have to do some mining...I can now churn out the copper and bronze pretty much with my eyes closed now. Now to try and craft some weapons and armor...

SteveJW · « **Reply #12 on:** September 24, 2005, 08:46:00 PM »

There is something wrong...

Ravenne is sullen and angry. She won't say why. And Jet seems to be avoiding her. Odd behavior for someone who the other day professed love for Ravenne. It doesn't make any sense.

I...fell again today. In Storan's crypt. A gaze from one of the undead creatures sent me to the Void. And this time the Soul Mother was paying attention. Her call is getting stronger...harder to resist. But I held on to the one thing that keeps her at bay...my love for Ravenne. But I fear that one time...not even that will be enough. And maybe that would be for the better...

Foolish talk...Corsan...foolish talk...you can't let the Soul Mother win...fight until the last breath...and maybe Ravenne will love you for it...

SteveJW · « **Reply #13 on:** September 27, 2005, 09:05:00 PM »

I hope this doesn't mean what I think it means....

I ran into Ravenne outside the smithy and she seemed to be in a hurry. In a hurry to be with Shelu. I asked to kiss her...but she was more interested in Shelu. Her exact words were "SHELU is waiting for me." A kiss on the cheek and she was gone.

Do I repulse her so much that she would rather be with a woman than with me? She must be under some kind of spell.

I'm so confused...I don't know what to do now...

SteveJW · « **Reply #14 on:** September 28, 2005, 05:23:00 AM »

It is true...

Ravenne would rather be with Ranewin than with any man...including Jet. She says different but she is like all those other elven girls who just saw me as a curiosity. Now if it were another man...I wouldn't be so hurt...but a woman...

Why do I do it...why do I always give my heart out...only to have it crushed...I may never learn...

SteveJW · « **Reply #15 on:** September 28, 2005, 11:07:00 AM »

We parted on good terms I guess...

But it doesn't hurt any less. Went to the Direwood caves with Tedulas. I...told him what happened. He was understanding. Said a similar thing happened to him and that in time...the hurt will pass. I hope so...and I find myself not hating Ravenne...I did tell her to follow her heart...I just hoped it would lead her to me. I still do...maybe she will realize just what she could of had with me...but I doubt that will happen.

But it is time to move on...I can't let this turn me into a vegetable. I guess I'll pound some metal...take my mind off my troubles...

SteveJW · « **Reply #16 on:** October 02, 2005, 01:27:00 PM »

I met someone in the Seilwood Caves the other day...

Faile is her name. And a pretty name at that. She helped me out of the caves with some mined ore by bolstering my health and strength. And dispatching those pesky kobolds too. In return...I gave her some mineral gems I came across while mining the ore...and she said that she will trade potions or gold for them in the future. I was just happy to get all that ore from Seilwood.

I met her again later on...but she had the death shroud on. She had become a practice target while helping out in the Berhagens. I offered to help get her to her body...but she smiled and said she would rest and wait for her soul to catch up with her. A nice smile to go with the pretty name and face. I asked if I could wait with her...keep her company..she thanked me but said she would rest alone in her room. Maybe next time.

Corsan....Corsan...Corsan...what are you thinking? You just had your heart crushed by Ravenne. This must be loneliness talking...

Jet is a true friend...true to the core. When I told him I needed to leave Hlint for a while...to clear my head and sort my feelings...he up and gives me a key to his house in Lar!! Says that if I ever needed to rest or just need peace for a while I am always welcome there. I owe him big...

It is peaceful in Lar. Maybe that is just what I need right now...

SteveJW · « **Reply #17 on:** October 02, 2005, 05:11:00 PM »

Strange things are happening...

Ran into Ravenne today. I thought she would have more salt for my wounded heart...but she was very contrite...and concerned for me. We talked a bit...but we parted on good terms. But it wasn't until Ranewin showed up that I found out why. Ranewin broke it off with Ravenne! I wanted to laugh...to say some mean things to her...but I couldn't. I know all too well the feeling of heartbreak...and I felt sorry for Ravenne. Even after what she did to me...I don't wish that kind of pain on her. Then she went off to the side with Ranewin...what they talked about...I couldn't hear.

But after they parted...I asked Ranewin if she would have a drink with me...and she accepted!! We went into the Surge and we talked and talked...about me...about her...about Ravenne. She is actually good to be with.

I just love it when things work out...

SteveJW · « **Reply #18 on:** October 04, 2005, 06:59:00 AM »

Ilsare works in a strange way...

Jet said if I carry the symbol of Ilsare...I would find love and guidance. Now that Ravenne is no longer in the picture...it seems Ilsare is working her wonders.

I guess Ilsare was trying to tell me that Ravenne wasn't the love I sought. But Ranewin...Ilsare seems to think that she would suit me better. I am more comfortable with Ranewin...as these last few days were great. We laughed together...we admired the sunset together...we talked about Shofar....gave her a shoulder massage. And her birthday is coming up...she wants me to come to the Leilon Arms to celebrate...and nothing would keep me from going.

Maybe this is the guidance Ilsare is providing me....

SteveJW · « **Reply #19 on:** October 06, 2005, 09:42:00 PM »

I never thought my life would turn around so quickly...

Ranewin took me to Shofar today. What a peaceful and serene place. And cold. But we didn't mind...we kept each other warm while we took in the sight. She told be she believed in love at first sight. She also thought that I hated her at first...but I told her that that was at a time I wasn't really myself...but now...I felt like a new man around her. The cold started to get to bitter on the hill...so we made our way down to Velensk...where we found a spot near the pond. We talked some more...cuddled some more. And then it happened...

We became intimate right there...we cared not...we just gave in to the moment. We couldn't help ourselves. The passion just flowed.

Never though it could be this way. Ravenne...was a confusing point in both our lives. But now Ranewin and I have each other...and now everything seems clearer...