Elgon's coming of Age

[curtwise]

i have done my chores, fulfilled the quests asked of me and learned to fight with some of the best. I am not dedicated to any deity except to survival. I have some friends and a few enemies as well.

I stand for what is right and good, not a Paladin by any means, but a respecter of persons and especially the underdogs. I despise ego maniacs and arrogance, especially when it hurts others.There are a few of those in Hlint. But mainly the people i have met are gracious and genuinely concerned about others and Layonara.

I work hard at learning about the different crafts and have acquired skills in Fletching, trinkering and wood working. I am learning to cook but my food turns out like sandpaper and the sandpaper turns out crummy. I can make weapons, bows and hope to learn more about armor and iron weapons.

I smelt copper, tin and iron and am learning to work other ores also.

I can cut some gem stones but make more dust than anything (except greenstone).

I am a little shy around the ladies but enjoy the company of a thoughtful woman. One who is self reliant and not insecure. I like sitting around a campfire cooking deer meat and talking of the universe and the grand scale of things. I share but not too much at a time and feel that i have time to make friends before bearing my soul.

Speaking of sharing, i make things and find things and give things away. That is my choice and i delight in giving gifts. I like sharing with good friends and good times and have been known to drink a brew or two.

I look forward to living and growing in Layonara and I know not where i shall end up but will enjoy the trip to getting there!

I hope to focus more energies on my fighting abilities and would like to become a weapons master. I am patient as i shall live a long and happy life and will get stronger everyday.

With time devoted to perfecting my abilites and fighting techniques i will have little time for social engagements and frivolous affairs. But am most willing to spend some mutually gratifying time and experience with the right lady. Maybe that makes me too serious for most but that is the way to get ahead in this world. Work and fighting with love trailing as third priority. I am young and open to change and hope to have the satisfaction of meeting my "soul" mate someday.

I have recently had the pleasure of meeting several very nice young ladies. One in particular catches my interest but i need to spend more time with her to see if "we" get on with each other. Time will tell.

[curtwise]

I ran into an old fighting friend yesterday, Elrend. He had been on a journey and recently returned. We adventured with some others into the Temple of the Eye. Elrend always seems to have some goal to attend to and we accomplished just that. I regard him as a very good friend.

Met with Robert Hearth briefly before he had to leave. He has taught me much about stategy and fighting. He's been a good friend and a life saver too. I enjoy adventuring with Rob.

Talked briefly with the love sick Paladin, Thomas. He's to be treasured for sure but cant help but worry about his heart on his sleeve.

Then There's Nepp, his ragged sense of humor and endless energy, good adventure buddy.

I havent seen much of Cym lately, we seemed to have lost our connection. NOt sure what happened there if anything. Could be we are both very busy. He is industirous and has been supportive of me from the very beginning of my stay in Hlint. I hope to keep in touch with him, continue to be friends and work together.

There are some many new faces of late, it's hard to keep track of names. I have had the pleasure of taking some new folks around Hlint. Eagle comes to mind. I dont understand him yet but he appears to be steadfast and well principaled.

I recently have met a man of unusual manner. Rain Darsus, he has approached me with an interesting business proposition. He is also planning and talking of marriage to a friend i met some time back, Sonya. She's an interesting person of strong beliefs and principals. Although she practices magic of the darkside, she is quite straight forward and helpful.

Rain is a kind and giving person, very trusting of others. He seems to be quite genuine in his words and deeds. I have pledged my sword to him should he ever need it.

Rain recently introduced me to Jenna Pandorn. She is quite nice (but not shy) nor given over to pretense. I like that in a person. She recently made inquiry as to an oak short bow. So i made her one and some ammo to go with it. She was very appreciative in a most genuine way. I like that too. We've been on two adventures, both quite short in duration but a good time just the same. She is a proficient archer and not afraid of battle. I like that very much!

I dont see much of her though and she seems interested in someone of whom I'm not sure. I just sense soemething unsettled with her heart (maybe).

We'll see what tomorrow brings!

[curtwise]

Met two adventurers today and we went on a grand tour of areas that i had only been to once before. We fought blue snakes and giants of the desert. Samir is a most interesting sort of fellow, generous to a fault and brave beyond imagination. His prowess with his sword proved to be the undoing of our enemies. It was fun and exciting despite the fact that our traveling companion Seril fell to the giants of the desert.

Samir was most regretful and sincere in his loss of his apparent friend. Truly a remarkable and giving warrior this Samir. I shall seek his council in matters of fighting again as he is a good instructor and i learned much from him that day.

[curtwise]

By chance i met Jenna Pandorn(or was it chance since Rain had beckoned me), Rain suggested that i take Jenna to His and Sonya's wedding. I must admit i was caught off guard and realized i dont own a tuxedo or shoes for that matter. In my clunky sort of way, sort of asked her if she would go with me. Sort of! She didnt say yes but stated that it would be nice. I think that means yes, now what to do, i cant dance?!

She was wearing a striking dress of her own making. She is very talented.

We stole off to the campfire for some private convsersation. I think things went well. She suddenly got up and yawned saying it was late and had to leave. We said our good byes and good nites, and that's when it happened, she gave me a kiss on the cheek!

I did what every normal red blooded half elf would do, i blushed and decided to load my ox for some travel. I was over come by fear. My face was as red as the fire and a fire burned within myself.  I am taken...no smitten by this girl...this lady? I cant think right now, better go kill some ogres and get right with the world.

[curtwise]

Got a summons from Elrend my old friend to go to Roldem. I've never been there and didnt think i had it in me. He encouraged and said the party didnt mind if i joined. I met up with Q=Quilius and Karana who always enjoys insulting me. I think she doesnt mean it personally but so what? I met a very strong cleric but cant recall her name now? I hate not remembering names.

She was graceful but forceful with her spells and her fighting. Very interesting person.

We ventured through drow and giants and nearly lost ourselves with the earth elementals, huge ones. i survived but barely. Karana took the front and the brunt of the attack and i tried to flank em. It worked for me but i think Karana took a beating, probably used to it by now!

We got good coin and i learned that is no place for me to be alone!

[curtwise]

So many adventures have come my way. I cant but think that Tegan is by far the most upredictable woman i know, but one of the best magics there is. She heals when needed and fireballs the heck out of em when needed. Great fun. But her mood can turn quickly, dont cross her!

Armolas is quite different in behavior, hard to tell when he's serious or kidding. But he seems to have a good sense of humor, I think? He's a pretty straight up guy though and good at strategy too. Enjoyed fighting along side of him.

The most predictable fighters and reliable are probably Elrend and Silverhand. Both set out to accomplish and go for it. Sometimes over my head but i usually survive. Great adventuring fun with either of those guys. Silver is generous with me always giving me items without expecting. Elrend too, they would both fight ya for the last gold coin but would give ya the shirt off their back.

Rain, what a great wedding. Those two (Rain and Sonya)seem destined for one another. Rain seems naive at times but is generous to a fault. I feel like he is a brother to me. He is still moving on the guild idea. Hope it works out. I am grateful for the friends that i have made in Layonara.

Then there is Jenna, so innocent and sweet but not without sparkle and shine. She is something else! I cant describe how i feel, not now anyway, too early. She makes me feel worthwhile and like i'm a man. I must think on this more and be cautious. As her brother (Kyle) has informed me. I dont know Kyle, he seems kind enough but serious enough so as not to cross him. I will go slowly and thoughtfully in regards to Miss Jenna. I respect her and wouldnt want to cause her harm or hurt.

Time to go to bed and rest, so much crafting to be done..tomorrow!

[curtwise]

Lousy day of andventuring two mortalities with Robert and Strykyr. Vampires and trolls terrible curses they are. Upside? i ran into Samir again, had a good conversation with him and went on a short adventure. Man can he fight and his magic! Great fun and what a teacher too. He knows his way around so well. Awesome warrior!
 

Got back to town in a bad mood and found Jenna in the crafting house with her old friend Talen. Didn't mean much at first,  but when i saw them laughing and whispering to each other, something raged up inside. Jealous? me? why? It was an ugly moment for me, inside and out.
I said some things to Jenna i shouldnt have and didnt mean. I need to find her and speak with her.

MY crafting as of late has been off, made an oak staff and and oak short bow. Tinkered a bit and made some arrows. Lost the silver arrow heads and some of the platty too. Couldn't believe the luck.

Met Cym and crafted 3 crystal rods for him. Got very lucky!

Ran into Mercas, and we talked about the Guild and him heading it up. He is genuine and so sincere. I liked him the day i met him, seems like eons ago now. He is one who has my sword anytime!

Had a most interesting conversation with Jaleel, he seemed very disturbed aobut some actions taken by some members of a party he was with in High Forest. Something  about Paladins and Rangers not behaving accordingly. I didnt ask names but tried to help him understand how we folk of Hlint are all struggling under stressful times and circumstances. He said he felt better but I think his faith had been shattered.

[curtwise]

Worked at my crafting today and gained some vital experience in cooking. Gathered more oak than i care to think about. Tried to make an oak long bow for Dalan but failed. Filled an order of oak parchment for Elrend for his scribing, twenty sheets. Finished the arrows for Rain and made a few iron tips for me self too.

My heart aches when i think of how much i have to say to Jenna and havent seen her for days. I hope that doesnt mean i've lost her favor. Just need to work harder and keep my mind on crafting and perfecting my weapon skills. I feel stronger everyday but havent done much fighting lately.

Saw Creighton today, always a gentleman and gracious. Wish i had more opportunities to fight along side of him. Sometimes i feel that i isolate myself too much and bury myself in work.

I miss Jenna's company and smile...hope i didnt mess this up! I need to speak to her and let her know my true feelings and how immature i've been acting. I saw Kyle at the craft house, he spoke and i got tongue tied and just blithered. He must think i'm an idiot and not fit for his sister.

I made some oak shafts for weapons too, Robert wanted some, havent seen him since the other nite. We had such a time drinking and fighting in the arena the other nite. *chuckles to himself* Felt good to let off some steam, even though he beat the dickens out of me. It's late and i'm tired from a long day of crafting, got to get some sleep.

Polishes his sword and sheaths it beside his bed. Curses the spider guts and blood, "Dang i hate spiders"! More oak tomorrow and more spiders to kill, *hoping he doesnt have any nightmares about spiders*
*Turning his thoughts to Jenna* pleasant dreams my love, *the words bearly escaping his tired lips*

[curtwise]

Another day of crafting making oak bows.

Met up with Rain and we went for sand for Treana, so sorry to hear of Addison. I had just purchased an amulet of Shield from her to, i shall cherish it.And of all things Rain mentions or rather announced that Sonya is with child. He is very excited and worried. Something about planning for the future and staying alive to raise his child and other ramblings.

Rain gave me a key to a house in Krandor and said i could use a room. We met with Nyyana and Mercas, in Krandor and Mercas bought a house on the spot. Very nice house and they both seemed very pleased about it. I do believe that Nyyana and Mercas are nesting. So now we have a house warming to plan for, i'd like to make some furniture for the house but...well not very talented at that yet.

I miss Jenna in my heart but i keep busy with crafting but seeing Nyyana and Mercas together and so happy..well...it kind of hurt.

Rain and i have had some very deep discussions of late and it has got me to thinking of my future rather than just blindly wandering through life. He has a kind heart and a deep consideration for others, something i believe that i lack? I just dont have social skills. I was raised alone by my mother and ended up raising my little sister and brother. I had no time for social graces, just survival and provison.

Growing up! Bah! not what it's all cracked up to be! Perhaps i should leave here and hire on as a mercenary somewhere. Just live to fight, it's so much simpler that all this who's who and what's what in Hlint!

Tired now, killed some snakes in the desert, best get those guts off me sword. *wiping his sword clean, Elgon falls back onto the bed* ZZZZZZZzzzzz.....

[curtwise]

Saw Jenna at the craft house in Hlint yesterday. She is so beautiful, more than i deserve. We talked for a bit and sat by the Lake Alon. We held each other and kissed. What a night!

Then we went to Haven on a run with Mercas and Rain. What fun! Mercas has become a fearsome force. He wields his spells with an authority that impacts anything that stood in our way. Great fun to watch him work.

It was Jenna's first trip to Haven and she seemed a little frightened at first but she is a bold adventurer and stood her ground well.  She is a fighter too with good skills. She looked amazing in her outfit, ummmmm!

I think i've fallen for Jenna, dont know what that means yet, but it feels kind of funny at times...inside me. She makes me so happy, i look forward to seeing her again and again and again, etc.

Time to rest, got more arrows to make tomorrow and hopefully i will see the light of my life, Jenna.

*repairs his mining pick* and *cleans his sword* *drifting off into a dream of Jenna and her beauty*.......ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz..........

[curtwise]

Jenna and I talked and i appologized to her, and she was gracious. She showed me a spledid dress that she said was for my eyes only...what a lady! Take her out of the leathers and put on a dress and whew! I didnt want to go fight that nite, just set with her and look into her eyes.

We ended up going to Borlan's Crypt or whatever it's called? We had a great group with Cym and Mercas flinging fireballs, there wasnt much left for a fighter to do though.

Jenna and i parted shortly thereafter on the way back, she went to Hlint and I to Krandor. Some day, who knows, we may be going home together!

Went to Grey Peaks with a group Armolas ans Tegan lead me and a bunch of newbies up and back. We had casualties but not me this time, the curse is broken! Yahooie!

Then i went to Sielwood with a couple of new guys and ended up dying from spider bites. Things like that keep a fighter humble and hungry for revenge. I hate spiders!! Gained some more experience in woodworking and cooking. Still cant make anything edible though. I need to work on tinkering skills, need to make crystal rods.

Had a strange conversation with Cym about some guild/coop, he was involved with. I believe he said Robert Hearth, Strykyr, Silver and himself are forming. Said Silver might want to see if i would be interested. I like most of the fellows involved but i have a committment to Rain too. Right now i'm a free spirit and i dont owe anyone anything. Feels good!

Made more arrows and a couple of oak bows. Getting tired and cant keep my eyes open...i think i love Jenna...but i love my sword too...fighting or love...or are they the same?   Too young to know of these things, i suppose, just a free spirit *reminds self*.

Clean my sword and dream of Jenna...yes...that beautiful blue dress....stunning...ZZZZZzzzzz...

[curtwise]

Most unusual day today; it seemed as though Rain's idea, nay, dream of a guild might be at an end. I believe the Pandorn's are being courted by another guild. The Orc Basher's, to which they belonged at one time, so I am told. I overheard the conversation and discussed it with Rain, thinking they were making inquiry on behalf of "us".  Rain imediately went to Ferrit and my heart went crazy...what had i done?  

Ferrit tried to assure me that all was ok and so did Rain..but..still..i dont like being in the middle of things like that. I felt like i was betraying the Pandorns, yet upsetting Rain too!

I just stuck to my crafting and busied myself with gathering herbs and oak.

Rain and I spoke as did Kyle Pandorn, it seems as though the "dream" is alive and well, as the Pandorns are still "in". Rain assures me I'm still in too.

Then tonite I met up with Jenna, what a wonderful person she is, so caring and thoughtful. NOt to mention beautiful! She is independent but is considerate of me and my feelings too. She just seems...well...perfect for me. We saw Kura and she realized that we were a "couple", she said some really nice things to us. She is a very sweet person.

Jeena and i got to talking and making some plans when Silver, Cym, Eredel made me an offer to join their fellowhip cooperative, guild to be. I really like and respect all of those guys which includes Robert Hearth and Strykyr. Couldn't give em an answer. Said i'd think it over.

I dont want to lose their friendships but i have a committment to Rain and his group to. I cant believe, that me, Elgon Merrick is demand for anything?! I'm not an outstanding warrior nor an accomplished crafter....wonder what others see in me? I wonder what Jenna sees in me?

Growing up is not an easy task..it was so much easier when i was young and raising my siblings...even by myself...I had real purpose and focus. It was easy to figure out survival and protect my brother and sister. Now its deciding on who to associate with, who to love, who to serve, it gets so confusing sometimes.

I sometimes feel like being a hermit and fighting solo, living in some cave. No one to worry about or complicated decisions to make. But true growing up means being social and interacting with others as i learn about myself...Ha! I gotta go to work.

[curtwise]

Yesterday was  boring with the usual chores and crafting. Then there, in the corner, i saw her out of the corner of my eye, trying on new clothes, my Jenna. She has such style and grace, just natural for her. Some women have to work at it, not Jenna, she has the natural ability to compliment me and my personality. She is the envy of others, especially other women.   She just makes me beam with pride and burst with virility. Well...yeah its true, i think i'm in love. That's scary to admit but oh so true, true to my heart!  Jenna left and i went to Haven mine with Rain and Rhynn, joined by Dora. We did alright, surprisingly, each held their own and we mined, made some coin and survived. I have to admit, Rhynn to me is like sandpaper at times, but we managed to get along for the duration. She is actually a good fighter when she has to be and best of all, she likes to kill! Dora is easy going and easy to get along with, a real team player too. I was impressed with her fighting prowess. That capped my evening, back to some raw fighting, enjoying my weapon! I dont know if Rhynn was just spouting about fighting and weaponry but it means everything to me. I live to feel the blade, piercing and slashing my enemy.   The way it feels when my sword hits and breaks different bones in their bodies, ribs are soft and crack easy, arms and legs are tougher and dont break so easy, and heads and skulls are like melons, brains flying everywhere! I want them to bleed and suffer for their filthy existance.   Death is not a bad thing, the pain lasts for only a while. A warrior must not be afraid to die, not stupid mind you, just not afraid. A true warrior doesnt charge head long into a death trap, knowing that death would deprive you of the opportunity to live and kill again. You use strategy and study your quarry and find their weakness and strike at it! The satisfaction of a good kill is so rewarding and you feel so powerful afterwards.   *looks at his sword, what a beauty she is, he thinks to himself* *smiles broadly and proud*
   "But so is Jenna, so beautiful and innocent!" *as he mumbles to himself*
  *looks back at his shiny sword*
  " But your sting is great and your bite is fierce" *strokes the fine blade*
   *looks intently at  the sword, and sees his reflection*
  *Your reflection seems to be saying*, "until she pierces your heart you fool!"
  *Shaking himself head back to reality* You are faithful and true oh Sword of Death but you are cold and cruel and Jenna is warm and loving.
  I'll not let you come between us, I swear upon my own mother's death! For that is the fate that killed my father and destroyed my mother, a bloody sword!
  Love lost is more painful than any sword thrust to the breast, i'll not let it be my own undoing. The Gods have mercy on my mother's soul, who loved my father so dearly. And he my father, who threw away her undying love for him on a worthless war and his death was of you.....and by you, you cold death steel! *throws the sword down*
  I pray to what Gods there are that i not lose the love of my life, please, i pray! *tears falling on his pillow*
  Help me to be the man that i need to be, that i will cherish her and drink deeply of her love and savor every sip. 
  Jenna my love may i dream of thee for an eternity......my love....ZZZZZZzzzzzz.....

[curtwise]

A trip to Haven mines, always a pleasure. We had a young group but some veterans went with us. Got some coal and some iron. Not much though.  I didnt feel bad about not getting coin of which i did not partake, or the ore of which i got two nuggs. No...there was something more thrilling, exhilarating if you will...the Sword of Death popping those ogres like swollen casks of dwarven ale. They're inards spewing on the others as i busted them open with my love...the Sword of Death...what a feeling of power and strength! Oh Yeah!!
   *thinks to himselfas he admires his sword*
  She's never failing in her determination and her precision. She is always there for me, protecting and serving me without asking of me. She requires nothing more than a good cleaning. *pulls out his soft leather hide soaked in pig fat* * *He slowly strokes his sword, his love, polishing her to a shimmering gleam.  *Once again his reflection blares out at him and seems to mouth the unthinkable*  "Can she match my glory? Can this Jenna protect you and love you truly as i have? Does she give you the feeling of blood lust and the reward of conquest?....ha...ha...ha...Ha!"  *"She is weak and of the flesh, she will fail you, just you wait and see, my love...and who will be there for you?? My cold hard steel.. your true love...killer of evil and destroyer of your enemies! The Sword of Death..."*   My sword is true and faithful...*mumbling to himself* She has never failed me and has kept me alive through it all..*he proclaims loudly*   *thinking out loud* You cant trust people, they lie and they hurt, they're cruel and cutting...killing of the spirit and torturing my very soul.Look what my father did to my mother, left her alone with nothing but us children. Fending for ourselves, surviving the best we knew how....and then my mother passing away...miserable from her broken heart!   *looking at his sword*
  It seems to be almost laughing.I can hear it in my head, echoing and ringing insidiously...louder...until...*shaking his head* He emerges from this dream...no...a nightmare of sorts...*looks again at his reflection in the shiny blade*   What do i do now...can i trust Jenna? Should i leave and save myself from a certain death of love lost and a broken heart? I wont do as my mother did. Slowly whithering away and dying of a broken heart and loneliness....loneliness?   Wait...you liar and deceiver! *grasps his sword by the blade* *squeezing until his hands begin to bleed* You would have me live alone with only your cold steel to soothe my wounded heart? No...i wont be fooled by your taunting of my love for Jenna...you cant sway me from what i know in my heart!  We are meant to be together and we are bound in our hearts by the words and deeds of our very real love for one another. Not to be swayed by flesh or steel from our chosen destiny...Is it of and by the heavens and the gods in those realms, that we two should be bound together by true love? It is more than mere chance happening or by the slight of hand guided by a few friends. The very universe trembles in awe of the love that we share..to the point of laying down our lives for one another if it would be required of us, evenof the devil himself!  No...dear Sword of Death...i will not fall prey to your charms of blood lust and murder or your promise of faithfullness...for although you cannot lie..you do not know my heart or the true intentions of my love for , Jenna. Nor could you know of her love for me, for you do not have a heart or soul to touch me as she has done.
  And as you failed my father and allowed his death...you will not take me downto suffer his fate. And to leave a wounded heart behind to suffer a slow and anguishing death as my mother did surely suffer..until her dying day.
  *looks into the reflection on the blade, now streaked in blood*
  You fool Elgon, you believe that you can survive without me? Ha! Sheath me and be done with me?Why, You can no more resist me than you can this fleshling you call your love. We shall see who wins your love and your very soul....who you can trust your very essence of life to...fool!..not the girl...not the girl!
  *he turns away* *clasping his head in his bloody hands* *the tears washing the blood from his fingers*
  Perhaps you are right? The flesh and its essence, the heart and soulcannot be trusted. It sways like the tidewith every new emotion and feeling that courses through the mind and the marrow. Perhaps this feeling that we call love is a cresting wave ofwarmth and joy that is destined to receed as quicly as it has come. And the embers of the fire are blown hither and yon leaving emptiness and sadness, just as my mother was emptied of life and joy as she withered away unto her own death.
  *picks up his sword and wipes her clean* * looks upon her blade and mouths the words*
  I can trust you, for this i know, and unlike the death that befell my father and decended upon my mother, you shall protect me and cover me, keeping me from harm and pain and that wretched fate called death.
  * the now clean reflection, stares back at him*
  You are safe with me Elgon, death shall not overtake you, my fine warrior, not with me in hand, no never....sleep now and wake to a new day of revenge for the losses that you have suffered from these mortals.....rest my love...rest.....ZZZZZZzzzzz.

[curtwise]

I saw Jenna last night. She is so beautiful and patient. She waits on me to decide what to do and lets me talk with friends and never gets pushy. Is she perfect or what?  Went went for a walk to outskirts Haven (it was raining at Alon) and climbed up the hill. We sat there watching the stars and people and drinking Xeenite wine. I think we said everyting to each other except marriage proposal.  We're in deep now and my talk with Kyle went very well, he essentially gave us his blessing.He seemed very understanding and ecouraged me to relax and have fun. But he did say dont hurt her...but he fell short of a consequence...i'm pretty sure it wouldnt be pleasant!  I even asked her to spend the night with me but we both agreed that would not be appropriate just yet...just yet....Ha! It's getting serious i'm in over my head and my heart is the guide. Be honest true heart and be true to your love for yourself and for Jenna.  I'm scared though, what if i cant live up to her expectations? Or Kyle's? Not to mention Ferrit too?   Rain has been such a good friend through this ordeal, he's watched me suffer the insecurities and lack of self confidence. He's encouraged me when my courage was failing. It's amazing how this little girl, so petite and sweet, can send shivers of fear down my spine!   My sword i know her, and the enemies i can face without fear, but Jenna, how do i say it...i have fears within me that i cant fight with the sword and bow. I remember facing off with my first ogre, i was terrified, knew death was eminent should i not prevail.   Now Jenna is not an enemy...oh no...but the fears i have of...dare i say ...love....are more fearsome than the giants of the desert! I'm in a battle with my heart...and how do i prepare for a battle with myself? I dare not pierce my own heart or run in fear and hide in a cave?!  I can hear Rain's voice in my head, "just follow your heart", even if it leads to the most pain i have suffered since the death of my mother? I'm having a hard time convincing my head that this love relationship is a good thing.  * he glances at his sword*  Am I being untrue to you my love, the steadfast compass of my life? Will I have to leave you and your beauty behind?  Then there's the fear of what happened to my mother, will happen to Jenna. That some fateful day i will not return from battle and leave her hurting and alone. I cant bear that thought! No one has the right to inflict that kind of pain and suffering upon another...especially one that I love so deeply!  *turns from his sword*  Not today Sword of Death, i care not to hear your twisted thoughts and rancor. Leave me some peace in my heart today..and do what you were made to do. Kill mine enemies and smight the evil from this land, until no filthy creature stands against us.
  That is what you were created for, death, and nothing more...you are not the love of my life...and you will not come between Jenna and my love for her. Save your cold cutting for the ogres and gaints and leave my heart be..for you shall not pierce me but only mine enemies..and nothing more!

[curtwise]

i spent a miserable day on Dregar, solo, such a bad thing to do. I was vulnerable to most anything that came along. Challenged the Soul Mother twice and I  won this time around...... pumpkin headed scarecrows. Farmer Part can have em for all I care!  By the time I found Hurm and got back to Hlint I was exhausted. Tried to work but couldnt concentrate on anything.   Then Jenna appeared, as if a breath of fresh air from the heavens...I missed her so.   I felt as though i had to speak my heart and mind and let her know how i felt about us and the future. I was very honest, brutally honest in fact...I just knew she would panic and leave...just for survival's sake...her own survival!  But she kept reassuring me of her love and devotion, that she had faith in me...Me? That i would do the right thing and our love would sustain us through the tough times. I explained to her that I am a warrior, not by choice but by the way i had to survive in this world...taking care of my brother and sister after my mother passed away.  It is by the Sword of Death, my father's sword, that i and my family made it this far...and that by this same sword shall i live.....or....die!
  I thought that it would  be unfair  to her to be waiting at home, wondering if i would return this day or not. I saw a repeat of my father and mother's own love and lives.....and deaths...i couldnt let myself do that to anyone...especially Jenna.
  So just as i thought perhaps, this will kill what we have and could have...she boldly looks me in the eyes and says "then we shall fight side by side...protecting one another!" I almost fell into the campfire!
  I could not even imagined that she would have even thought such a thing!....what could this woman be thinking??  I love her even more...she's more than i could ever imagined...more than even my mother could have done for my father. She said that we would be together in love and in battle and that  together we would overcome any obstacle or enemies!
  I cant let this diamond fall from my hands and heart! She is all and more than I could ever want in a partner...dare i say?   A wife ?
  *unsheaths his sword for cleaning*
  *humming an elven  song he learned from his mother*  
  * the blissful moment is shattered by manic laughter*  
  Ha! "So you've fallen for the fleshly frail wench, fool?"
  *he galnces at his sword and his mirrored image lunges out at him*
  "of  course she is going to tell you what you want to hear!" "that is the beginning of the deception" "to lure you into a false sense of security, are you blind?"
  "She cant protect you in battle, save your life in the heat of a frothy graze with death!"  Ha! "Who has been your protector all these years...have you forgotten your first love?"
  *staring intently at the blazing glare of her blade*
  "I know that you are right my love, but I am not being untrue to you or myself"
  "Jenna is my re-enforcement, my second weapon in battle, fighting back to back, willing to die each for the other!"
  "Argh!" " You mean a distraction in battle",  "A campaign of weakness frought with silly little sayings and lustful glances"
  " She will be your very own death sentence, fool" "Battles are for warriors of valor and strength, not weak willed love struck wanna be's"
  "She will be your death and downfall, Elgon, trust me...the faithful one" "your Sword of Death, your true and first love"
  *he falls back, dropping his sword and clasping his heart*
  It is as if you've pierced my very heart...vile sword!  You would take my happiness and rob me of this feeling i have and for what purpose?
  To lead me to my certain death without ever knowing the love of a woman? You would be that selfish?
  I am torn and broken with sadness, for my heart is troubled by this...this...truth and yet lies...i cannot say anymore what is true and what is not?!
  * he hears the muffled sound of laughter* *he looks down at the word* *and for a moment a glare catches his eye*
  "already she has begun to weaken you" "and yet you would revile me...the one true love of your life?"
  " I can only protect and serve you as your soul mate, if you are not distracted by this creature of weakness, this Jenna"
  "Elgon, you must decide to live as a warrior or die as  lowly servant to this wanton wench of selfish desire, this Jenna as you call her"
  "your mind is strong and your body is fit, but your heart is lustful and selfish, it will lead you to your death, down this path that you call love" Ha!
  *shaking his head and clearing his eyes*
  I must rest from my weary day..i cannot wrestle with this one more breath longer...maybe you are right my love, my Sword of Death..maybe you are right.....ZZZZZZzzzz..... *ever so softly, there arises a quiet laughter of evil**"sleep Elgon my love...sleep and dream of me..your true love..your Sword of Death"* Ha! Ha! Ha!

[curtwise]

Could have been another lonely day without Jenna but i met up with Kyle, Rain and Ferrit over in Velensk. Pyyran was there and we talked politics for a bit.  We gathered in Hlint and folks crafted as Kyle and I gathered needed materials for the others. Kyle was kind and spoke as a big brother to me, reassuring me as a warrior and a man. He tried to teach me his spinning kick but i could only fall to the ground dizzy with my head spinning. He sold me his iron half plate for a good price and it fit perfect. I later customized it, the colors are brighter with a tribute to the color of blood that will surely be spattered upon it. Soon i hope!   So while everyone was busy with this or that, i busied myself with killing some orcs north of Hlint. Maybe some people dont realize that the orcs are the elves oldest and most hated enemy?  Anyway, the Sword of Death and myself set out to busting a few of them up. When Rain and Kyle came up and appeared concerned about me...and "my sword" as they so stated.  We discussed tactics and strategies but I was distracted by their decided prejudice, and pointed accusations about the "sword". Kyle asked to see the sword and i shared her with him and Rain, nervously, for she doesnt like the hands of strangers upon her.
   He asked me to examine his fine Kantana and i did briefly, but only briefly, for she gets jealous of others if i should dwell too long with them...
  I then had to rather insistently retrieve her from Rain...but he made some foul remarks about getting a feeling of evil and sickness from her...my love...my Sword of Death, made me wonder about him and Kyle both?  I was not concerned about my love, my sword, but about the distinct difference of opinion that Rain and even Kyle and I share about war and killing, blood letting if you will...they seemed offended by my words and actions...as if I were...well...a devilish barbarian!  Chiding me and lecturing me about righteous this and high and mighty that...as if they really understood about a warrior and his weapon...the intimate oneness of man and steel. Kyle said he did, he's studying to be a weapons master. He may have the moves but does he have the heart to achieve that true oneness with his chosen love...his chosen weapon?
  I may be on a different path than most...that i dont doubt...but when others question your very soul about being a warrior and a master of your weapon...i have to wonder?
  *takes out his beloved sword* *listens to her hardened steel sliding across the sheath*
  Hummm...orc blood, foul things *he mutters* Disgusting vermin and scourge of all that is good!
   My beloved, once again you have proven your worth and devotion.
   *scratching at the dried blood stains* *he catches a glimmer from her blade*
  * Again the raging laughter in his head rears up and stuns him for a moment*
  "So...evil am I?" "Ha! I, the one that cleans your path of harm and wretched filth?"
  *startled he looks at the sword*
  Wha...at? * shakes his head slowly in disbelief*
  "You let others touch me and defile our love and then you listened to their lies" " How dare they!"
  "That quick cut to Kyle's hand was just a warning"  
  A warning you say? You cant and better not hurt my friends...this is not yours to decide, you are forbidden to harm any of my friends, ever!   Especially my love, Jenna!
  "Your love? Ha! Where was this Jenna, your  love today? Guarding  your back as she promised?...Was she the one knocking down the orcs and ogres?"
  " I think not, Elgon, there was only me...and this Jenna...was no where to be found." " I told you of her lies and now her brother's lies, how much more can you take from them?" " When will you realize the truth...I am your truth, Elgon...there are no lies within me!""My blade determines truth and what and who is right, do not forget this."
  Perhaps, you are right..maybe all along? I've been a fool, drawn into this plan, a conspiracy? But what could these people want of me? They have been kind and given of themselves to me..but yet...they seemed to turn on me and true...Jenna was nowhere to be found?  
  "Only now you see this Jenna in the true light, poised with a dagger to pierce your heart, in the name of love?"
  "Do you think this was meeting of chance Elgon? This was orchestrated by Rain and set in place by Kyle and sealed by Jenna." "Fate perhaps but it's your death in the balance." This Rain, Kyle and Ferrit...what torment have they planned for you my love?"
  They seem so genuine and kind to me...i cant believe that they would mean me harm? I cant believe what i am hearing!
  "Did they not mock you today? Did they not question our love, our bond? What do they know of us and what we share? Don't let them in! They will be your death! They will surely lead you to slaughter! They want to take me away from you and leave you defenseless, cant you see this?"
  *he retracts his hand from the blade, as a trickle of blood drips from the edge*
  Ouch, dang! How clumsy of me, I....I wasnt paying attention to what i was doing!
  *an evil laughter erupts from the sword*
  "Ha! Ha! Ha! You fool! Lose me and lose your life! Choose this woman, Jenna and she will tear us apart and you will surely die!  I cannot protect you if another stands in my way! Dont let this happen Elgon! Dont let these fleshlings destroy our love!
  These people mean me no harm you wicked witch, you are the dealer of death and destruction, not Jenna. Be still and desist  this very moment! You are to serve me and that you will do or go into the smelter's fire and bellows!
  *throws the sword aside* *it falls point first and sticks in the hardwood floor**shaking from side to side like a snake about to strike*  
  I need rest now, leave me to my dreams of my fair lady, Jenna. Good night and may you dream of busting ogres heads!
  *mutters to himself* *and falls into his pillow*
  "Young fool, Elgon...you cannot shove me aside without regard! Abandon our love will you? I had your father's soul and I shall have yours.
  I shall have that girl's head too! Hummmm....Let me see...Yes..of course..while in battle, I , Sword of Death,  shall strike her down! And it will seem as if by the hand of the enemy..and I shall have my Elgon once again." Ha! Ha! Ha!
  *Elgon rolls over in bed* ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz..............

[curtwise]

i'm exhausted!  I met up with Ferrit, Kyle and Rain in Krandor...Ferrit bless her heart gave me a lion bag...my first! She does nice work * tugs at it* it's strong!  Strange thing, happened, my sword came up missing!  At first i thought maybe Rain and Kyle were playing a joke on me. But then no one would fess up and i became enraged. I left the Free lance in point Harbor and went back to search the house for the sword..my love.  As much as i didnt want to think it, i checked in Rains crates..low and behold... buried under some things was my sword. I was hurt and angered too, i ran all the way back to Point Harbor, well except for a short boat ride. I confronted Rain, who was by now drunk and nearly passed out.  He denied taking the sword but accused me of talking to my sword at night and over heard some nonsense...i cant even remember..he kept quoting some phrase..dont remember what.  He got all emotional and threatened to take his own life...something about proving his loyalty to me.    Then i found myself apologizing to him...just to keep him from doing something stupid. Meanwhile I think Ferrit was thinking we both needed to be thrown in the bay. Rain finally calmed down and we talked..he tried to convince me that the sword was cursed or some such thing and that it had control over me!  So he tried some mediation technique and Mercas examined the sword. I did feel better after talking and meditating but what Mercas revealed of the runes on the sword concerned me and all but confirmed what Rain was saying about the sword.  Let me think now, something about the bearer being soul possessed by the spirit of the sword. I went back to my mother's journals and tried to  decipher the history of this sword. Indeed it had been passed down from generation to generation but on my mother's side of the family,not my father's. Even though he died with it and used it in battle. Then, there was this one part about this sword being made for a Tethrin Veralde'  a demi god of sorts. He was the son of Corellon(creator of elves) and Sehanine(moon goddess). Something about my mother being desended from royalty but was banished for having fallen in love with my father.  And the other strange thing about the sword...and my father..a wizard brought the sword to my mother, just after my father was killed in battle. Or so I had thought. He was not killed in battle but was alone and run through by his own sword...the Sword of Death.   So now I'm the bearer of this sword and accused of being possessed of a blood lust frenzy killer of sorts. So now i must find a way to master this weapon and overcome the "curse" that took my father and has nearly destroyed me!  *yawns* *drops the quill*  *Begins to write again* So i must seek out a priest or cleric or wizard of the weave perhaps to help me understand and control the power of this weapon. And perhaps a mentor, a weapons master to guide me and show me how to be the master!  *yawns again* I must sleep now....so tired...Jenna, thanks for the letter and reminding me of your love...I need to see you... I must tell you of what has happened to me. I am so lucky and blessed with good friends, almost family...something i've not had in years..*yawns*
   *glances over at the Sword of Death*       *falls back into bed* ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz................................  *Ha! Ha! Ha!  You fool Elgon...my plan of Rain's betrayal failed..but I'm not done yet. I'll let you continue to think you're master, until I'm ready for my master plan...Jenna's death! Then I will have your soul!  I must protect you and myself at all costs..those meddling fools...he calls friends...this Mercas...thinks he knows of me...Ha! Ha! Ha! Death to them all!!!!*

[curtwise]

It's been a couple of uneventful days, not much crafting, not much fighting either...I miss Jenna! Every since I started to meditate, I've lost my edge, my sense of raw power has left me.  So much so that i challenged the Soul Mother as an infuriated Yehti took me down as i was runniing wildly in circles..not my style. I dont understand how i have lost my drive and desire for blood letting...i feel pitifull and pathetic!  What good is a warrior that cant utilize strategy and overcome and enemy? Meditation may have calmed me down and I do feel more in control but much less effective. I swing and miss my target because i'm not focused and i just cant seem to position myself for an advantage? I dont understand, i'm the master but not an effective one...that's where the Sword of Death came into play. She knew when and where to strike, with intensity and lethal accuracy. She's gone and i'm...lost without her...just holding an empty shell in my hand..not a powerful blood lusting weapon of death!  Rain visited the Soul Mother, same Yehti i suppose...we were off guard and unprepared for the onslaught. Ferrit also left a grave marker on that forsaken mountain side of misery. Mercas escorted me back for recovery but Rain and Ferrit were not to be seen in the mountain.   Perhaps we were over eager and careless in our approach, and it cost us three lives...i'll say no more about defeat...tonite!  I'm just an empty shell with out my Jenna or my sword, my life seems to be going down hill and i'm still just young! I need to get my focus back and follow my heart in love and my head in battle..Need both of my loves.  I'm tired from climbing mountains...it's time to rest...I pray for Sonya's and Rain's twins...so tired cant remember names even...dang! I wish Rain safety and Sonya peace, i hope that i can help with both. I am anxious to see the twins too. Like to see the look on Jenna's face when she sees them...i can see the smile already...she has such a giving and loving heart and soul...God i love her...!  I best clean me sword for tomorrow's conquests..*removes sword from sheath*  This time there is no sizzling steel sounds or shiny glare to be seen..just cold steel..lifeless and cold..Sword of Death? Are ye suffering your own death? Have I killed you, your spirit?  *looks at the sword as if he expected an answer*  I'll clean her tomorrow, I'm tired now....*lays the sword aside and falls back into bed* ZZZzzz....  "It's working Ha Ha Ha! He's falling apart, weakened by his friends, Ha!...enemies more like it!   He'll be back begging me to join him again...unleashing my awesome killing power of death! Ha Ha Ha! He'll be mine again and i will have his very soul...just as i had his father..Ha Ha!
  "Sleep dear warrior, for tomorrrow we vanquish your enemies, those enemies you call friends! Ha Ha Ha!!!

[curtwise]

Met up with what I'm beginning to call my family. Rain, Ferrit, Kyle and Mercas.Did some fine adventuring and nobody died!! Whahoo!  I need to do some crafting and get some arrows made soon.  The sword performed flawlessly today, knocking down giants, ogres, everything. Great team we had...good enough to tackle my nemesis, Grey Peaks...it was fun! Felt good to be in control and letting some blood.   I am beginning to feel that these folks are like family to me, they're all i have right now. They genuinely care about each other and even me!  Still no sign of Jenna, getting nervous about her and our relationship? Bought her some Flowers at Hope...I hope i see her soon! My heart aches for her but just knowing that she loves me, keeps me going...I love that girl!  Time to clean this battered sword, probably need to take her in to a Smitty for and over haul.   *runs his fingernail over the blade's edge*
   *hears a faint moaning sound* *shakes his head as he looks at his sword*  Must be hearing things? ....Time for bed already...eyes are drooping and i'm hearing things...I'll work her tomorrow and shine her up good.   *Sets the sword against the wall*
   *lays his head on his pillow* *begins to smile thinking about Jenna*
  *mumbles to himself*  How lucky I am...so lucky to have the love of this woman....indeed.....My lovely Jenna *yawns* ZZZZZZZZZZzzz..  "This woman he says...Ha!  She's nothing to him...i am his life!" I must gain control, i must get back what i had...with Elgon...his love, his touch, his devotion...i had all of him!"
  " But how do i get him back? These people have become a distraction, He dares to call them family...I am his family! His father's blood is upon my soul drawn from him into me...I have the blood and souls of his family for generations!"
  "I do need a plan...hummmm...but what?" Yes, of course! "I shall inhabit his dreams and lead him back to me through his slumber...yes...yes!"