To Halflings and Others of Proper Stature

[Acacea]

A colorful young halfling sticks a notice rather low on the wall, and then sighs when she sees where the rest of them are. She drags a chair over and, standing on top of it, posts the message right on top of the others, using her dagger to hold it in place. She leans back to admire her work, shifts her weight from one leg to the other, and promptly falls off the chair. Looking around and seeing only drunks and the hosts of the Wild Surge Inn who probably can't afford to lose a customer who buys so much ale, she kicks the chair back where it was and walks out while scowling in a fashion you can only assume is supposed to be fearsome.


Recently there was a vicious attack on halflings by an orc with a giant axe- the townspeople, guards, and adventurers standing around did absolutely nothing except briefly look at the going ons, and talk about what pelt Johan needed next. This is an outrage! The halflings made a brave stand, but were forced to run for it when the orc bellowed something about heads being ripped off, and were promptly chased through town by the creature, even though it was made clear that they were just trying to get away!

Peace was attempted with ale, but the nasty bugger raised its axe anyway (a complete waste of a good drink, the biggest atrocity of them all!) and surely there would be no one to warn the town if a tall person had not walked up. To save them? No! To sell it things! This is utterly unacceptable even for the Madhouse and Inconsequential Door of Demons! Halflings and children are being run over by giants and attacked by orcs and when they call out for help, they are ignored and forced to watch the attackers being greeted with open arms.

Worse, they will take your ale and attack you anyway, and if that is not a breach of some sacred rule then I don't know what is! Fierce faces can no longer come off when in town, as it is not at all safe for anyone!

[Victor]

*scribbled in dwarven below*

To my kinfolk, I say this:

For us to overlook our smaller cousins would be a mistake.  How many times have the dwarves been misjudged because of our stature?  Let us not make the same error.

Where ale has been spilled, blood soon follows.

If trouble comes, treat the wee folk as kin.  They may act like annoying younger siblings, but they feel like family.

[Vyris]

*written in neat, block script common*

I shall harbor no orc, nor suffer the abuse of one of conservative stature, the wilds are no longer safe, if the town becomes a haven for lawlessness than there shall be no respite for tall, broad nor propper.

Breg Brightglade

[Variable]

*written in a rough but neat manner*

This is unacceptable, all those who wish to stand against the Orc, should stay armed and be ready.

-Tanner, of the Swordwinger Clan

*drawn below the signature are the symbols of Dorand and Deliar*

[FraterAudcal]

*written in very cramped, small, neat letters*

I, Balit Glenhobber, as a fellow member of the shorter kin, hereby swear to do all I can to aid my brethren and sisters in defense against the marauding, savage orc blood that threaten our existence.

Regards,

Balit Glenhobber

[deagle]

*Twixel reads the note before him and starts to swear unders his breath in gnomish. Before long he takes a deep breath and bellows out a loud*

"RRAAA"

*he then stomps out of the inn*

[Diamondedge]

A simple looking halfling walks into the inn, and sits down, holding an ale. He peers up at the message board, looking for anything interesting, and sees the notice, quite promptly, that is stuck to the board with a nasty-looking blade. Inquisitively, he pushes a chair over and hops up, taking a look at the note and all it's posts hanging off the bottom, nearly reaching the floor! He can't help but giggle, just a little, as he takes another warm sip of his ale. He then begins writing his own reply, in a very hard to read script, as if by a hand not practiced in the ways of writing. Not much, anyways.

This orc attacked my friend Acacea and I. Well, me, first. It chased after me, hollering huge obsenities after I called it "strange". It was running around in circles shouting 'Weee" at first. Then at my remark, it slammed me in the head with the face of it's giant axe, knocking me flat on my back! I told him that hurt and he could cause someone some serious damage if he did that to anyone else. He said sorry, and that he'd use a smaller axe. And so he pulled one out. And I ran away, and he chased me!

And then Acacea and I made something of a stand against the orc. But of course, nobody around did anything to help us. I was scared out of my wits, but nearly as much as Acacea was. She high-tailed it, calling for me to follow her, frantically and worried. Naturally, being the man I am, I hesitated, thinking that I should stay the beast here and now, for the better of all. But no, I ran, too. Reluctantly, I might add!

We ran to an open door, and slipped inside. Panting, we came to a rest, and the orc leaped into the doorway, astounding us with it's speed! Naturally, Acacea ran away, but again, being the man I am, I kicked the orc in the shin and stamped on it's toe, before slipping out the doorway between it's legs.

Then we ran across a field, and it caught up with us. Acacea's knees were wobbling, and she slipped around and hid behind an ox. Being the heroic man I am, I stepped up and stamped on the orc's foot again, waving my finger dangerously in it's face. "If you bonk anyone on the head, I will hurt you something bad!"

And Acacea threw the orc a bottle of ale, trembling behind the ox. "Please don't hurt me!" she cried.

People walked on down the street, and did nothing! Is this what Hlint is supposed to be? A place where innocent halflings get hunted down and beaten up while the rest of the town stands idly by!? It is a horrible thing! I won't stand for it!

Signed,

Tiran Tentoes
Farmer

P.S. This was possibly subjected to a poetic liscence. There may or may not be halftruths hidden amongst those words. But the jist of it is true, honest!

[Acacea]

Acacea finally makes it back into town after avoiding it for a long while, feeling irritable and just cranky in general, which makes her more grumpy because she would rather be in a good mood. She walks into the inn, and orders two of every kind of alcohol Yastin has in stock. She takes a sip of a bottle at random and then almost spills it when she sees the replies. She gets up and investigates, skimming down until she sees Tiran's, which she reads with a furrowed brow, her cheeks getting redder until she reaches the end.

"Son of a rhyming gnome! That lousy bark-licking halfling! Never saving his bloody life again!" she mumbles to herself, and removes the dagger strapped to her thigh to stab it through middle of Tiran's post, hoping he'll get the message. At the bottom, she adds:

"The next time you are running scared from an orc, I won't even reach for my bow until you're crying on the ground like a girl. Maybe more people will be paying attention to save your sorry hide, though. (Shorty!!)

"Cheerfully- Acacea Liquor Nicker"

[teefal]

*written below acacea's note*

I was there.  I was suffering through another halfling bragging contest, with Acacea and another halfling boasting to each other of which of them was the true "Hero of Hlint".  The orc ran into town and I pulled my swords and stood before it, then realized he was a friendly orc that I knew from the day before, who was having a bit of fun, playing tag with another.  I could sense his intent was not malicious.

When the halflings began talking big to the orc, threatening him, I decided it would be a fitting lesson for these two to determine which was the *real* Hero of Hlint, and as such, walked away to let the brave halflings deal with it. If they were misrepresenting their true abilities, this is their failing, not mine.  Perhaps this dose of humility may soften their claims in the future.

[Acacea]

Looking determined that this will be the last time she walks in to check, she observes the new message, and swearing under breath, pulls her daggers from where they held the notes, tearing the posts down. She places a small one where they were, that reads simply, and unsigned:

If you're reading this, you're in Hlint. If you're smart, you'll leave.

[Thunder Pants]

*adds a small note to the bottem* it took you this long to figure that out?

[Diamondedge]

Hee hee hee

Tiran Tentoes, Hero of Hlint
Farmer

[Trip1888]

*Bido takes out his book of notes and scribbles a few words while shaking his head*
*Bido puts up his book, pulls out his Monk's wrapping and binds his hands tight thinking to himself*
I may not be able to help the larger races.  But by Aragen one of my kin shall not be harmed!

-Bido Ryskill